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Malaysia: Difference between revisions
imported>Arif No edit summary |
imported>Arif article is full of unfunny shit |
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{{天|<big>'''ATTENTION [[you|FAGGOTS]]!'''</big> | {{天|<big>'''ATTENTION [[you|FAGGOTS]]!'''</big> | ||
This page was made unfunny by [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|self-righteous]] [[Democrat|Pakatan Rakyat]] [[fanbois]].|Bersih.jpg|150px|Yellow|55%}} | This page was made unfunny by [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|self-righteous]] [[Democrat|Pakatan Rakyat]] [[fanbois]] and [[poor|Indonesians]] [[trying too hard]].|Bersih.jpg|150px|Yellow|55%}} | ||
<div class="center" style="width:auto; margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto;">[[Image:1malaysia_logo.jpg|center|500px|Malaysian Flag]]'''Spam this pic [http://malaysia-today.net/ here] for maximum trolling''' | <div class="center" style="width:auto; margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto;">[[Image:1malaysia_logo.jpg|center|500px|Malaysian Flag]]'''Spam this pic [http://malaysia-today.net/ here] for maximum trolling''' | ||
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[[Image:Boa_hot.jpg|thumb| Malaysian whores [[Unrealistic Expectations|THINK they look like this]]]] | [[Image:Boa_hot.jpg|thumb| [[fugly|Malaysian whores]] [[Unrealistic Expectations|THINK they look like this]]]] | ||
[[Image:Asian_girl_bra.jpg|thumb|[[Slut|A classy, respectable Malaysian girl]]]] | |||
'''Malaysia''' is a South East Asian tourist trap inhabited by a species of [[Shit|humans]] called Malays followed by [[China|chinks]] and [[India|Indians]]. The immediate neighbor of Malaysia is [[Singapore]], which Malaysians hate because of the better system of government and the longer age expectancy the Singaporeans enjoy (and also how fckg rich they are), which just means that Singapore is shit better than them. They claim to be an Islamic nation, but really, most of them act like Jews and they still they call themselves true Muslims. | |||
[[Thailand|'''Malaysia''']] is a South East Asian tourist trap inhabited by a species of [[Shit|humans]] called Malays followed by [[China|chinks]] and [[India|Indians]]. The immediate neighbor of Malaysia is [[Singapore]], which Malaysians hate because of the better system of government and the longer age expectancy the Singaporeans enjoy (and also how fckg rich they are), which just means that Singapore is shit better than them. They claim to be an Islamic nation, but really, most of them act like Jews and they still they call themselves true Muslims. | |||
<s>[[unfunny|They also have advanced weapon called "Green laser" and successfully rape Vietnam & Indonesia.]] | <s>[[unfunny|They also have advanced weapon called "Green laser" and successfully rape Vietnam & Indonesia.]] | ||
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==Language and Culture== | ==Language and Culture== | ||
[[Image: | [[Image:LeeHomPotrait.jpg|thumb|What Malaysians aspire to be, and [[fail|failed]] in doing so ]] | ||
The official language of Malaysia is Malay, which basically consists of sounds created by putting the tip of the tongue on the roof of the mouth just behind the teeth and moving it backwards, unlike the French language that will make anyone who tries to speak it die from a brain jam. Go ask a [[linguist]] to do a French tongue twister and see for yourself. | The official language of Malaysia is Malay, which basically [[HA HA HA, OH WOW|consists of sounds created by putting the tip of the tongue on the roof of the mouth just behind the teeth and moving it backwards]], unlike the French language that will make anyone who tries to speak it die from a brain jam. Go ask a [[linguist]] to do a French tongue twister and see for yourself. | ||
However, in recent years, the Government realized that this inferior language has resulted in many instances mass miscommunication, sounding like retards and thus started the rapid introduction on English into the country. The Malaysians today mostly speak a modified, unperceivable form of English. The Chinese Maraysians? What erse? They speak [[Engrish]]. Mostry spoken by typicar Chineze dat never study Engrish in primary schoor. | However, in recent years, the Government realized that this inferior language has resulted in many instances mass miscommunication, sounding like retards and thus started the rapid introduction on English into the country. The Malaysians today mostly speak a modified, unperceivable form of English. The Chinese Maraysians? What erse? They speak [[Engrish]]. Mostry spoken by typicar Chineze dat never study Engrish in primary schoor. | ||
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The capital of Malaysia is Babi Lumpur, which is pretty much just like New York City, only it's about 500% full of shit and has significantly more violent crime. Although Malaysian routinely do crimes from time to time, they simply cannot contain the crime rate, as the favourite national pastime in Malaysial is stealing other people's worthy shit. | The capital of Malaysia is Babi Lumpur, which is pretty much just like New York City, only it's about 500% full of shit and has significantly more violent crime. Although Malaysian routinely do crimes from time to time, they simply cannot contain the crime rate, as the favourite national pastime in Malaysial is stealing other people's worthy shit. | ||
'''Executing''', be it criminals or Christian priests, are their second most popular national pastime after [[ | '''Executing''', be it criminals or <s>[[pedophiles|Christian priests]]</s> opposition leaders, are their second most popular national pastime after [[gay|badminton]], a piss-poor copy of tennis. [[China]] owns them in this sport, but it doesn't matter if Malaysia or China won as [[FACT|the winner will be Chinese]] | ||
Malaysia's badminton Olympic team regularly has felt its fair share of limited success, but this is partially due to the fact that no one plays badminton because | [[truth|Malaysia's badminton Olympic team regularly has felt its fair share of limited success, but this is partially due to the fact that no one plays badminton because it's]] [[gay]]. | ||
==Government and Politics== | ==Government and Politics== | ||
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[[Image:Hishamuddin_Keris.jpg|thumb| Typical Malaysian politician promoting [[Bullshit|racial unity]] ]] | [[Image:Hishamuddin_Keris.jpg|thumb| Typical Malaysian politician promoting [[Bullshit|racial unity]] ]] | ||
[[Image:Chuasoilek.jpg|thumb| '''M''' | [[Image:Chuasoilek.jpg|thumb| '''M'''ARI '''C'''ARI [[slut|'''A'''MOI]]]] | ||
Malaysia is a dictatorship under the undisputed leadership of [[liar|Najib]] who slept his way to the position of Head of [[wat|UMNO]]. The UMNO, The [[terrorism|United Malay National Organization]], runs the Malaysian government, and they are | Malaysia is a dictatorship under the undisputed leadership of [[liar|Najib]] who slept his way to the position of Head of [[wat|UMNO]]. The UMNO, The [[terrorism|United Malay National Organization]], runs the Malaysian government, and they are so good at it that's why many [[poor|Malaysians]] moved to [[Australia|another]] [[singapore|country]] because they want a <s>better</s> [[life]]. Prior to [[satan|Najib's]] leadership, Malaysia was run by [[Adolf Hitler|prominent Anti-Jew Activist]] [[Mahathir bin Mohamad]]. | ||
Ruling party is [[forever|still]] [[satan|'''Barisan Nasional''']](BN) [[pathetic|since the nation's independence]]. [[hypocrite|Promotes 'racial unity' while simultaneously perform racial segregation]]. BN is composed by sub-parties like: | Ruling party is [[forever|still]] [[satan|'''Barisan Nasional''']](BN) [[pathetic|since the nation's independence]]. [[hypocrite|Promotes 'racial unity' while simultaneously perform racial segregation]]. BN is composed by sub-parties like: | ||
* UMNO (untuk melayu no [[brain|otak]]) | * UMNO (untuk melayu no [[brain|otak]]) | ||
* MCA (make chinese angry) | * MCA (make chinese angry) | ||
* MIC (mighty indian [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|cock]]) | * MIC ([[micropenis|mighty]] [[nigger|indian]] [[The Great Black Dick Hoax|cock]]) | ||
* Other [[shit nobody cares about|parties that are not so important]] | * Other [[shit nobody cares about|parties that are not so important]] | ||
The opposition, [[Hypocrite|Pakatan Rakyat]], upholds liberal values and frequently uses race card and minority bias. [[Democrat|Sounds familiar?]] Headed by [[Obama|Anwar]]. Sub parties: | The opposition, [[Hypocrite|Pakatan Rakyat]], upholds liberal values and frequently uses race card and minority bias. [[Democrat|Sounds familiar?]] Headed by [[Obama|Anwar]]. Sub parties: | ||
* [[socialism|DAP]] (full racist chinks who think that they are [[Fact|second class citizens]] but [[jews|control the Malaysian economy]]. [[Greedy]] bastards. | * [[socialism|DAP]] (full of racist chinks who think that they are [[Fact|second class citizens]] but [[jews|control the Malaysian economy]]. [[Greedy]] bastards. | ||
* PKR | * PKR ([[Unrealistic Expectations|justice for the people]]) | ||
* [[muslim|PAS]] | * [[muslim|PAS]] (wannabe [[arab|ragheads]]) | ||
<div class="center" style="width:auto; margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto;">[[Image:Zunar_cartoon.jpg|center|500px|yea right]]</div> | <div class="center" style="width:auto; margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto;">[[Image:Zunar_cartoon.jpg|center|500px|yea right]]</div> |
Revision as of 12:29, 14 September 2011
Did You Know: Malaysian law allows grown men to marry and rape children of any age. Sorry NAMBLA members it only applies to girls. |
ATTENTION FAGGOTS!
This page was made unfunny by self-righteous Pakatan Rakyat fanbois and Indonesians trying too hard. |
Malaysia is a South East Asian tourist trap inhabited by a species of humans called Malays followed by chinks and Indians. The immediate neighbor of Malaysia is Singapore, which Malaysians hate because of the better system of government and the longer age expectancy the Singaporeans enjoy (and also how fckg rich they are), which just means that Singapore is shit better than them. They claim to be an Islamic nation, but really, most of them act like Jews and they still they call themselves true Muslims.
They also have advanced weapon called "Green laser" and successfully rape Vietnam & Indonesia.
Indogs lost 3 - 0 and the first leg and win 2 - 1 at the second leg in the football AFF Suzuki Yamaha Honda Misubishi Cup.
But indogs still lose 4-2 according to the stupid aggregate points.
Well, the Harimau Transexual beat Garuda that night after winning at the GBK. I AM A HUGE FAGGOT PLEASE RAPE MY FACE.
History
The land was called Malya at first, when the teacuppers had nothing else better to do but to rape the poor people there by bringing in the chinks and Indiansas slaves to rape Malaya for them. But somehow after all those years of getting raped by the British and Japanese, some tard finally found a way to free themselves by going to London to claim fake freedom around 1957, and they actually got what they wanted. That easy? Yep. But they're don't realized that, british still take over the goverment of malay-sial or whatever it is called until now
Some retards, should've done that bullshit couple years before...
Now it's called Malaysia. Most people think that it's a cross between Malaya and Asia, and so it becomes Malaysial. Which is totally unoriginal, but everything in Malaysia is unoriginal and that's a fact.
Language and Culture
The official language of Malaysia is Malay, which basically consists of sounds created by putting the tip of the tongue on the roof of the mouth just behind the teeth and moving it backwards, unlike the French language that will make anyone who tries to speak it die from a brain jam. Go ask a linguist to do a French tongue twister and see for yourself.
However, in recent years, the Government realized that this inferior language has resulted in many instances mass miscommunication, sounding like retards and thus started the rapid introduction on English into the country. The Malaysians today mostly speak a modified, unperceivable form of English. The Chinese Maraysians? What erse? They speak Engrish. Mostry spoken by typicar Chineze dat never study Engrish in primary schoor.
The national food of Malaysia is the Ramli Burger, which is banned in 76 countries up to date. The 'beef' patties are made from (believe it or not)parts of unwanted, dead, donkey parts, such as the nose and dick and testicles, which are flattened using pin rollers and sewed into a patty. The sick and the fckn mad would've loved that. Those sick fucks.
The capital of Malaysia is Babi Lumpur, which is pretty much just like New York City, only it's about 500% full of shit and has significantly more violent crime. Although Malaysian routinely do crimes from time to time, they simply cannot contain the crime rate, as the favourite national pastime in Malaysial is stealing other people's worthy shit.
Executing, be it criminals or Christian priests opposition leaders, are their second most popular national pastime after badminton, a piss-poor copy of tennis. China owns them in this sport, but it doesn't matter if Malaysia or China won as the winner will be Chinese
Malaysia's badminton Olympic team regularly has felt its fair share of limited success, but this is partially due to the fact that no one plays badminton because it's gay.
Government and Politics
Malaysia is a dictatorship under the undisputed leadership of Najib who slept his way to the position of Head of UMNO. The UMNO, The United Malay National Organization, runs the Malaysian government, and they are so good at it that's why many Malaysians moved to another country because they want a better life. Prior to Najib's leadership, Malaysia was run by prominent Anti-Jew Activist Mahathir bin Mohamad.
Ruling party is still Barisan Nasional(BN) since the nation's independence. Promotes 'racial unity' while simultaneously perform racial segregation. BN is composed by sub-parties like:
- UMNO (untuk melayu no otak)
- MCA (make chinese angry)
- MIC (mighty indian cock)
- Other parties that are not so important
The opposition, Pakatan Rakyat, upholds liberal values and frequently uses race card and minority bias. Sounds familiar? Headed by Anwar. Sub parties:
- DAP (full of racist chinks who think that they are second class citizens but control the Malaysian economy. Greedy bastards.
- PKR (justice for the people)
- PAS (wannabe ragheads)
Voting for Barisan Nasional in the elections is a national duty or you will be perceived as a self-loathing unpatriotic scum or a Singaporean faggot.
Anwar Ibrahim
Another favorite national pastime of the Malaysians is sodomy. Although it is officially against the 'Islamic' law to practice sodomy, only in rare instances has this law has been enforced, and a study in 2005 by MIT(Malaysian Institute of Technology) has found that 67% of Malaysian males between 20-25 habitually practice sodomy.
In February 2008, Mr. Anwar Ibrahim, a Malaysian politician/complete trash, led a band of gypsies to usurp the throne of Premier Najib. However Najib countered this by pushing Anwar's dick into prison on accounts of sodomy, and loling at his face and lulz. A bogus story was cooked up, and Anwar Ibrahim was publicly humiliated like a sicktard pedophile/necro/furry finally finding out that everyone knows he's a pedo/necro/furry.
Intranets
In 2008, Malaysia went through a massive Tech program to implement the Internet into the country, which was absent from the entire country in the past. Experts from Papua New Guinea were hired to implement Internet technology into the country, and Malaysia can now proudly boast a nation wide 55 kbps connection. And now to make that even better. UMNO is planning on frying every single p2p user in the country via the ISP providers. To quote an online newspaper article, "A proposed new law will enable Internet Service Providers (ISP) to suspend or terminate the Internet accounts of P2P (peer-to-peer) users. This new law called the ISP Liability act, will be tabled in Parliament next month." This bunch of hypocrites who after stealing enough money from their citizens to buy billions of CD's, they decide to sodomize em as well.
File-Sharing site censorship
EDIT: THE PREVIOUS DISCUSSION POSTED HERE IS MOVED TO DISCUSSION PAGE.
Last Thursday, Malaysia decided to be a faggot and raped every ISP to force them to cock block all the access to some file-sharing site. The government quoted the leetspeak that copyright infringement is molesting the media industries. What they actually conspired was they did it for the lulz.
Typical Malaysian Internet users who attempt to access these sites, will had their browsers returned with AIDS.
This resulted in much butthurt to the internets pirate who copypasta files into their hard disk. Many more gone BAWWWW because they can't download pr0n into their machine and fap at CP again. Not longer happen because even retard figured out how to access to these site easily by proxy and other VPN, which make block set up with over 9000 of dollars useless.
Despite of this act of censorship, Malaysian are still retard enough to feed the ISP with million dollar of income so that they can have internets.
Afterward, real drama ensured. Anonymous decided that Malaysia had enough period to retain their virginity and plotted conspiracy to gangbang the government portal for great justice. At first they was like I Am In Your Base Killing Your D00ds and created various amount of lulz. But tragically, government doesn't give a fuck and brought the portal back on. They said will take serious business to sue anonymous.
Some Wimmins decided not to be offended and created facebook page to protest the act. The page encouraged much troll to spam with over 9000 cocks.
The block was ordered by Rais Yatim as The Man of Malaysian Cyberspace Multimedia Association who have same stupidity as Bush.
Actually the whole Malaysia was sodomized by the government who illegally violated copyright infringement and blamed it on citizen. This fact is proven by one engineer doing fixing by programmed the government computer with SQL Injection reported that the hard drive was fulled of illegally downloaded stuff.
In summary, the typical Malaysian Internet user is fed with dick-flavored dildo almost everyday by their glorious government and their pet ISP.
National Defense
Tentera Udara Diranjang Malaysial or Royal Malaysial Air Force was the strongest Airforce in the world. They're have been involved in toughest Battle ever faced by them, that is "Battle Of Subang AFB" at that time they're struggling to survive with repeatedly sunlight which make TUDM personel almost dead. But there isn't malaysial's TUDM personel who Killed In Action. there's just 1 man who "black out" when some of them still struggling to staying alive LOL DISREGARD THAT I'M A BUTTHURT INDON
Malaysian ED users
Are not funny and mistake ED for Uncyclopedia.
Summary of Malaysia in 6 minutes
With Extra English Subtitles
Namewee is a fucking faggot, are you kidding me? Go listen to some Panda Head Curry if you want to hear some good social satire.
Tro0 Muslims [+]
Abdulkadir Masharipov • Abu Hajaar • Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi • Abdul Razak Ali Artan • Adnan Oktar • Allah • Ali David Sonboly • Anjem Choudary • Azad Rouhani • Benazir Bhutto • Carlos Latuff • Dave Chappelle • Elias Abuelazam • Espen Andersen Bråthen • Izzi • Jake Bilardi • Isa • Kaliph Jamal • Linda Sarsour • Mahir Çagri • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Mahoud Samed Almahadin • Malcolm X • Miss USA 2010 • Musa • Muammar Gaddafi • Muhammad • Mullah Omar • Muntather al-Zaidi • Mustafa Al-Habib • Nafiza Ziyad • Nayzak • Nicky Reilly • Osama Bin Laden • Omar Mateen • Richard Reid • Saddam Hussein • Salih • Salman Abedi • Sheikh Yarbouti • Syed Rizwan Farook • "Syrian War Refugees" • TigerCommander • Wellington Menezes de Oliveira • Yassir Arafat • Yuri Kochiyama | |
Countries & Peoples [+]
Afghanistan • Albania • Arabs • Azerbaijan • Bahrain • Bangladesh • Bosnia and Herzegovina • East Turkestan • Egypt • Indonesia • Iran • Iraq • The Islamic State Of Iraq and Sham • Jordan • Kazakhstan • Kosovo • Kuwait • Kyrgyzstan • Lebanon • Libya • Malaysia • Mali • Michigan • Morocco • Niger • Nigeria • Pakistan • Palestine • Qatar • Saudi Arabia • Sierra Leone • Somalia • Spain • Sudan • Syria • Tajikistan • Tunisia • Turkey • United Arab Emirates • Uzbekistan • Yemen | |
Beliefs, Events, Traditions & Other Drama [+]
1-14 Jakarta Attacks • 2017 Saint Petersburg Metro bombing • 9/11 • Allahu Akbar • American Airlines Flight 63 • Animal abuse • Anti-Americanism • Anti-Semitism • Arab Spring • Ariana Grande Massacre • Beheading video • Breitscheidplatz • Boston Marathon Bombing • Censorship • Circumcision • Crocus City Hall Massacre • The Crusades • Defense Industries Organization • E-Jihad • London sandnigger attack 2017 • Freedom Flotilla • Gaza War • Gazarooster • Genocide • Ground Zero Mosque • Holocaust denial • Homophobia • Islam Is The Light • Jihad • Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 • Misogyny • Muslim Dating Sites • 2016 Munich Massacre • Nice Truck Attack 2016 • Paris Mass Shooting • Pedophilia • Pulse Nightclub Massacre • Rape • Reina Nightclub Massacre • San Bernardino Shooting • Self-Immolation of Aaron Bushnell • Shi'ites • Slavery • Terrorism • Terror Soup • WTC | |
Infidels & Islamic No-Nos [+]
Alcohol • Alexandre Bissonnette • Ali Sina • Anders Behring Breivik • Atheists • Ayaan Hirsi Ali • Bacon • Rifqa Bary • Nick Berg • Tony Blair • Borat • Brenton Tarrant • Charlie Hebdo • Christopher Hitchens • Christians • Communism • Darren Osborne • Denmark • Donald Trump • Everybody Draw Mohammed Day • Fun • Fitna • Fuck Arabs • The Great Satan • Homosexuality • Islamophobia • Israel • Japan • Jews • Jihadunspun.com • John J. Pershing • Laura Loomer • Lee Rigby • Muhammad cartoons • Muhammad Sex Simulator 2015 • Muslim Massacre • Pagans • Pamela Geller • Daniel Pearl • Philip Manshaus • Pork • Richard Dawkins • Salman Rushdie • Satan • th3j35t3r • UK • Geert Wilders • W • Women's rights |