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Jeremy Corbyn

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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The revolution ends here
You gonna get socialised

Corbachev is a deranged Karl Marx reincarnate and Communist that somehow against all odds became leader of the Labour Party and promptly fucked it up.

Comrade Corbyn used to be some hard-left backbench pinko who has been a Labour MP since the early 1980's and often campaigns for things that shrewd politicians who first think about how it will negatively impact them in the future veer away from; i.e. trying to overturn convictions of imprisoned terrorists who bombed the Israeli embassy, and had been found possessing bombs and guns but had tried to say that they weren't going to use them in Britain. He was also a strong opponent of the Iraq War during the Blairite era of the party, which would end up making him the only candidate in the leadership election to not be a globalist neocon shill.

Corbyns' particular style of leadership is to do nothing at all, especially during life-changing referendums, and then hope that the socialists of Britain will vote for him regardless.

He is often compared to Bernie Sanders, which is an apt comparison given that Corbyn's chances of one day becoming Prime Minister is about the same as Sanders' non-existent chances of becoming President. Since becoming leader of the Labour Party, Corbyn has been thoroughly committed to consigning the party to dustbin of history.

Leadership

Jeremy Corbyn hates America

Like the retards they are, Labour Party MPs decided to parachute Jeremy Corbyn into the leadership contest in 2015 to quell the tide of butthurt liberals and their wailing for broader 'representation'. MPs who did vote for him mistakenly believed that another candidate who was actually somewhat sane in contrast and understood how politics works would instead be victorious when members get their chance to vote. Unfortunately for them, they didn't expect an invasion force of millennial whack jobs to join the party in amass, quickly outnumbering those were already members. Corbyn was elected to the leadership role by SJW students who believe they're wiser and even more so enlightened than all those who have come before them (excluding Corbyn, of course), the trade unions, and other Leftist buffoons who don't yet realise that the winds of change are blowing in the opposite direction. Of course seeing as they had never been in a political party before, they took advantage of pre-election offer which allowed them to vote for only £3.

When Corbyn miraculously became leader of the party, many people in Britain believed that he might be the one to liberate politics and implement meaningful change as he wasn't some privately educated yuppie from Cambridge. Instead what they got was the mumbling old socialist who shuffled around in ill-fitting suits whilst defending Sinn Fein.

During his time as party leader, the only thing he has ever done which was favourable to anyone was to bombard pig-fucker-in-chief and then Prime Minister David Cameron with a boatload of inconvenient questions he would never be able to answer honestly during Prime Minister's Questions. Other than that, nobody cares to acknowledge his existence, and he would be lucky to get a shout out on late night talk shows that no one watches.

Brexit

Jeremy Corbyn is still trying to unify Ireland with Sinn Fein leader Gerry Adams.

While many politicians during the Brexit campaign wisely aligned themselves with the Leave or Remain side, Commissar Corbyn did fuck all while masquerading himself as being in the Remain camp. Because most of the imbecilic EU-supporting Corbynite brigade appear to be blissfully ignorant of the fact that Corbyn opposed Britain joining the European Union, and was also in opposition of nearly every major EU treaty in history, he did nothing to support the Leave side, albeit he voted in favour of the referendum and is evidently a closet Brexiter. Instead he allowed Nigel Farage to bathe in all the glory as he didn't have the courage to slap down his occult-like followers during this once in a life time opportunity. He secretly opposes the EU because communists like himself believe that the EU is a globalist cabal of evil capitalists dominating over the proletariat via free trade.

After Britain voted to leave the EU, he quickly returned to spewing bullshit about how great radical terrorists are, thinking that this would just blow over and that he wouldn't need to grow a spine and pick a side after all.

Diane Abbott

Like a fine wine Abbott has turned to vinegar with age

Like all upper middle-class champagne socialists, Corbyn had grown up without having contact with anyone who wasn't like him; a never-had-a-real-job grammar school attendee who has only ever known a life of representing trade unions and being elected to political positions. So, to vindicate himself, he started fucking Diane Abbott's chocolate punani, a fellow MP who turns out was just the right type of black he needed to feel politically well-rounded. His appetite for Nubian ladies developed during a stint in Jamaica after university, where he spent 3 months trying to show black people how to be poor properly. He clearly maintained this hunger as Abbott attained a role in his Shadow Cabinet and has since received two promotions on the front bench once he was made Labour leader in 2015.

Jewenemy Corbyn

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Anger kikes? Israel strikes!

One thing that Corbyn definitely has going for him however, is his big redeeming factor. He is hated by The Jew with a passion not seen since You-Know-Who did You-Know-What, although he has Jewish blood in his veins. But just like that fictitious event, The Jew has nothing to pin on Corbyn who is too much of a pussy to get involved in any kind of conflict (or even polite disagreement). His only involvement in anything to do with The Jew Problem is to stick up for the Pakis because Corbyn can't see an underdog without wanting to save it, even if it has rabies, fleas, and rabid fleas, and is carrying a Mazeltov cocktail.

... Big mistake!

As a result The Jew has gone apeshit and resorted to trying to topple Corbyn from his position as Labour Party leader by accusing him (directly and indirectly) of anti-semitism, time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after time after... well, you get the idea.

It's almost as if there were six million Jews lining up behind Corbyn to knife him in the back. Each time they have completely failed. Suddenly, the traditional crybully tactic of persecuting your foes by pretending that they are victimising you has simply stopped working. The Jew cannot figure out what has gone wrong. And it drives them absolutely insane with anger. Obviously, being Jews, they are already insane, but this is a new pinnacle of deranged and frothing fury that must surely give even the most hypnotised goy a feeling of "Woah! WTF is all this about?"

Fall from leadership

Like another dictator who refused to quit

Somehow, he still believes that he can become Prime Minister despite the fact he has done little to nothing during the 9 months he's been leader. Almost all of the Labour Party have wanted him to go from the start, it getting so bad that a humiliated lame duck David Cameron telling him to leave. His biggest mistake besides doing fuck all during Brexit was firing the most important man from his Shadow Cabinet, which made everyone else in the cabinet leave in retaliation, which sent his leadership confidence into chaos.

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