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Revision as of 21:11, 25 April 2013
Voluntary exposure to this article may turn you into a furry. Please resist the temptation. |
Lopunny, referred to by Japanophiles as ミミロップ and known by furfags as SlutBuni, is the 69th Pokémon and is the female counterpart to Lucario. It is commonly known as an extremely cautious Pokémon, that cloaks its body with its fluffy ear fur when it senses danger. Though she is not as well recognized as the more popular Gardevoir, she remains a focal point of many pokéfags' sexual fantasies and stories, because everyone totally wants to fuck something that's 3'11".
Characteristics
She has the appearance of a bipedal rabbit, loosely designed off of Playboy bunnygirls; keep in mind that this is a character in a video game supposedly targeted towards children. She is very well known for her breedability with other Pokémon; her vast range of compatibility makes her one of the most useful tools for breeding, seconded only to Ditto. Her known abilities are Cute Charm (making her irresistible to her opponents when attacked) and Klutz (making various forms of sexual foreplay near impossible). Some argue that this Pokémon is just one in the same as all the other Pokemon, these people of course are wrong.
She can be obtained either through hax or by evolving a female Buneary; most trainers preferring the evolutionary method as it pertains to evolution through happiness, defined by how much a trainer loves its Pokémon.
Contrary to what some may believe, Lopunny are always female. No exceptions.
Fanboy Quotes
Many Pokétards have had various things to say about Lopunny.
Previous Quote | Next Quote |
YouTube Worship
As it would also be expected, many YouTubers make Lopunny-themed videos, most of which are so called "tributes" consisting of stolen images and copyrighted music, and the remaining few are just gameplay clips.
Previous Video | Next Video |
Typical Fanfiction
Fanfiction writings are just another aspect of this horrid fandom. Many fanboys will spend their time writing stories filled with grammatical errors that read as if they were written by 13 year old boys; hell, only 13 year old pre-pubescent fanboys would write fake stories about playboy bunnygirls anyway.
"...try the same spot tomorrow. It can't be hunted out this soon." is Ash's decision.
May is not so sure of that. For one thing, tho Pokewomen are rarely brainy, they aren't stupid, and one way or another word gets around that trainers are in the area, following which many Pokewomen leave. Still, it does take time for word to get out and Licksplit is unlikely to be the only one near here. So she makes no protest and the next day sees her again putting out bait.
Lucky or smart, Ash again proves right. They had been waiting for barely an hour when out of the bushes hops a brown furred rabbit Pokewoman about the same size as Ash, maybe a bit smaller, with lighter brown fur covering her lower legs and the tip of her ears that goes three inches above her head before curving down and stopping a half foot from the ground to bracelet-like tufts of fur on her wrists. With a distinct lack of caution, she jumps to the bait and bends forward, giving Ash a great view of her near D-cup breasts.
Ash was a bit distracted, but May quickly checks on the Pokewoman, to find …
SLUTBUNI - THE HORNY BUNNY POKEWOMAN - THIS POKEWOMAN HAS A GREATER DESIRE TO HAVE SEX THAN TO FIGHT, BUT SHE CAN BECOME VIOLENT WHEN ENRAGED WITH JEALOUSY. KNOWN ATTACKS: ENDURE, ATTRACT, CAPTIVATE
“So she’d rather make love than war?” Ash mutters with a gleam in his eye. “Well, I guess I can accommodate her…” With that, Ash steps into the clearing. Slutbuni is not scared off by his sudden appearance as most Pokewomen would be. Instead she blows him a kiss and starts to caress her beauties as Ash approached, tearing off his clothing as he did.
May guesses this is what is meant by “attract”, and it does seem rather effective, at least with men. So what were the others?… Ah yes, endure… she can keep on functioning long after other Pokewomen have become exhausted by pleasure. More of a defense than an attack, but… Captivate… hmm, those she defeats become her slaves to some extent. She’s sorta a low grade Pokeball.
There’s more, but May turns her attention to the “battle”, which is definitely a vigorous “fight”. Ash has already mounted her and is pumping away. He takes his time about shooting off for the first time, but does not stop when he has, to the joy of Slutbini who climaxes soon after him. The two continue to enjoy each other, in a variety of positions and manners, and May is no longer sure just how often each has come when Ash finally gives a big shout and slumps over Slutbuni. This is May’s signal to toss a pokeball at her and a moment later she has another addition to her harem.
It takes a fair amount of time before Ash can revive, and his 1st words when he does is “Where’s Slutbuni?”
“Here” is May’s response as she displays the Pokeball. “She’s not really much of a fighter, but we can sell her to a brothel for good money.
“A brothel? But that would be cruel!” Ash protests.
“It’s where a lot of Pokewomen end up.”
“But not her! It …it is just not ..”
May reflects that it is odd that Ash is wanting to defend Slutbuni from a brothel, while she wants to get rid of her. Fortunately a compromise is available… “Just turn her human and ask her what she wants.”
Ash finds this a reasonable idea. A minute later, Slutbuni is shifted to the transformation ball, and a little later, she is human, and is being told of the plan to sell her to a brothel. “I go to where a dozen men will jump on my bones every day for cash? “Why would I object? That sounds wonderful!” Slutbuni definitely lives up to her name. “OK, you are going to get your wish. Now do you want to be human or Pokewomen form when you’re sold?”
Fanart Glorification
To make matters worse, every single furry artist has heard of this creature and has made at least one fanart of her to place among their brawl screenshots and sprite recolours. Most of these artists worship her as if she were some sort of sex goddess; a small few just make her look as cute as possible. Some fanartists even go as far as making up an original charaters based on her design.
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50% of fanarts consist of this.
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Or this.
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Or this.
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Or this.
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The other 50% consist of this.
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...the fuck?
See Also
External Links
- Dead DeviantART
- Inactive Twitter
- Typical fanartist.
- Typical discussion.
- Not all furfags like this thing.
- TL;DR
- She isn't the only one that looks ridiculous. (But that's besides the point anyway.)
- How to Get Lopunny for Dummies.
- TOW
- Too much information.
- WAY too much information.
Lopunny is part of a series on Pokémon [Who’s that Pokémon?] | |||||||
Abra | Aggron | Alakazam | Bidoof | Blastoise | |||
Braixen | Charizard | Cloyster | Ditto | Empoleon | |||
Espeon | Garchomp | Gardevoir | Hypno | Jynx | |||
Jigglypuff | Kadabra | Kirby | Koffing | Lanturn | |||
Lickitung | Lopunny | Lucario | Lugia | Metapod | |||
Mewtwo | Misty | Mudkip | Omanyte | Pikaman | |||
Pokémon Go | Poliwhirl | Porygon | Primeape | Probopass | |||
Reshiram | Riolu | Seaking | Shaymin | Shiny Pidgey | |||
Slowpoke | Smugleaf | Snorlax | Snover | Squirtle | |||
Suicune | Vileplume | Xatu | Zoroark |
Lopunny is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |