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Bethesda Softworks

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Bethesda Softworks
Founded 1986
Key people Todd Howard
Website www.bethsoft.com

Bethesda Softworks (sometimes called Bugthesda Shitworks) is an American video game publisher and developer, best known for creating The Elder Scrolls series. The company is notoriously famous for releasing rushed unfinished games, filled with countless bugs and glitches, that nevertheless achieve commercial success because herds of misinformed and indifferent sheep purchase their overhyped products. This malicious marketing ploy is done by using even more false promises like future delayed updates that don't fix anything and new downloadable content with the same, if not even worst, level of quality.

Todd Howard, is the executive producer and game director that works for Bethesda and an evil pathological liar, that transformed the mere bad habit of lying into an art. All his deceit was eventually repaid over the years under the form of countless awards and prestigious titles, because the world is funny in that way.

Bethesda are also extremely lazy, most of the objects and items throughout their games are re-textured then recycled into some shitty DLC. They take ages to fix bugs due to them wiping their lazy, fat asses with all the precious money that they get from pathetic basement dwelling nerdy pieces of shit.

Sony fanboys rarely get the chance to play Bethesda's Elder Scrolls DLC due to the PS3 choking on its own diarrhea and crashing like the worthless piece of junk it is. And to REALLY make the lifeless fanboys rip their tiny pubic hairs out is the fact that Bethesda is too lazy to fix the bugs on the PS3.

Games made by Bethesda

  • Brink - A game nobody would care about if Bethesda wouldn't be the publisher.
  • Dishonored - A game where you play as an assassin with magic powers and a creepy mask.
  • Where's Waldo - Quite possibly one of the worst games on the NES. The game speaks for itself.
  • Rogue Warrior - A shitty first-person shooter with tactical elements that no one remembers. Its one of the worst games for 7th gen consoles.
  • Fallout 3 - Other than the fact that the world is nuked to the ground this game that has absolutely nothing to do with its predecessors. People still love this game for having better graphics. Was at one point considered the best game of its gen by normalfags who did not play Fallout 1 or 2 until enough time passed causing everyone to look at the game for what it really is, a big steaming pile of shit.
  • Fallout: New Vegas - Even tho' it came out two years later it crashes more than Fallout 3. When it came out it is universally panned, but over time it has been considered the best of the newer Fallout titles. Fans of this game claimed that you weren't a real Fallout fan unless you totally tore Fallout 3 to shreds declaring it the bad game that it truly is. Published by bethfags, made by Obsidian, who while being a bunch of Marxist hipsters have proven to be far more competent at game design than Bethesda at least until Obsidian went full Go Woke Go Broke in the near future.
  • Fallout 4 - Basically Fallout 3.5 but slightly more polished in terms of graphics and mechanics but also considered to be an even lazier and just plain causalized version of Fallout 3. Full of complete hand holding and terrible optimization. Do not buy!
  • Fallout 76 - The worst Fallout Game since Brotherhood of Steel. This game is a more broken Fallout 4 with terrible buggy unoptimized multiplayer. Normalfags fell for buying this cashgrab that was only designed to steal part of their paychecks. Ever since its release it has been panned by pretty much everyone even the mainstream gaming press that normally would shill these shitty half-baked games like this one as being the best things since sliced bread. People who bought this game are demanding refends meanwhile Bethesda fucks them over by attacking fans of the fallout franchise.
  • Rage - Same as Fallout 3 except the world gets fucked up by an asteroid. A subpar game that no one other than Bethfags care about.
  • The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind - The best RPG ever made that's being played by nostalgiafags and old people.
  • The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion - Same as Morrowind, except slightly shittier.
  • The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim - Played by 12 year olds because it has an extremely boring story, lots of cleavage, and it's easy as fuck.

Videos

See also

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