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Shaun Ellis
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Once in a while a furry will strike gold and live the life he has always dreamed of living. Shaun Ellis (a.k.a. the Wolfman) doesn't have a fursuit, doesn't spend all his money on comissions on FurAffinity and has never been to a Furmeet [citation needed]. Instead he has given up the delusional wannabe world of OL furfaggotry and moved on to IRL furfaggotry by living with wolves.
Background
Universally believed to be the ultimate wolfaboo, Shaun lives in Britain (where wolves have been extinct since the 1700s) and has been literally living with wolves for between 12-15 years, stopping only occassionally to put on clothes, sleep inside a house, cook his food, and use the toilet like all wild animals do. He does not bathe, as his wolves would consider this "unnatural." Like all furries, Shaun originally worked with foxes before deciding wolves were more awesome. Specifically, like all wolfaboos, he only likes the fluffy North American wolf, as opposed to the short and scraggly Arabian wolves, or the scrawny brown European wolves (which are more closely related to the now extinct British wolf populations than his zoo-bred North American wolves will ever be).
Also, like all wolfaboos, Shaun has proven he cares more about the latest animal in fashion than he does other people - particularly his own family. Shaun has several children from a previous relationship, after he realized that rolling in shit and eating raw meat with wild animals was preferable to taking care his brats. His wife has denied this allegation, however, and claims she divorced Shaun out of shame.
Shaun's ultimate goal is to re-introduce wolves to Britain. His plan sadly is destined to fail because:
- England is such an overcrowded and built-up country there is literally nowhere for wolves to live.
- The Welsh would not take kindly to wolves killing and eating their lovers.
- Although it just might be possible to re-introduce wolves to the wilds of Scotland they would most likely be shot, deep-fried and eaten by burly Scotsmen.
"Unique Maverick Researcher"
Shaun's claim to fame is his unqiue experiment of living and eating alongside wolves in their natural environment (the zoo) instead of viewing them from afar, like most researchers. Unfortunately, he is not the only lunatic to give up health, hygiene and sanity to live with wolves:
- German photographer Tanja Askani lived with wolves for 8 years. Like Shaun she too thinks that wolves are not the bloodthirsty hunters and we can all earn spiritual enlightenment by living with this great majestic creature.
- Filmaker Jim Dutcher lived with wolves for 6 years. Exactly the same as Askani and Ellis.
Notably, while both Askani and Dutcher lived among wild wolves, Shaun has only managed to live among semi-tame wolves living in cages.
Other Work
—He managed to shit |
Shaun has written several books on wolves including The Man who Lives with Wolves, The Wolf Within: How I Learned to Talk Dog (on wolf "language"), Wolf Talk (which is exactly the same) Spirit of the Wolf Talk (see previous) and finally Oral Bestiality Among Canines: How I learnt "Woof" means "Yes".
He also has his own site Wolfpack-management.com. Interestingly, the pages dedicated to wolf behaviour are all exact copies of the article about wolves from Wikipedia, thus proving a shitty online bureaucracy run by homosexual asspies knows more about wolves than Shaun Ellis.
Videos
How to feed wolves the Shaun Ellis way! Previous Video | Next Video |
Gallery
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What's next? Batman!
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Despite the username, he forgot to mention Furious George.
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HA! I could do his job in 15 seconds!
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You can if you live with them. This may also explain the condition of Shaun's hair.
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Shaun Ellis returns to his family, after being fired from the Combe Martin Wildlife Park
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Ellis extatically debating wolf issues with his colleague Farley Mowat
Contact (UNCONFIRMED)
Shaun Ellis Enterprises Ltd. / Wolf Management Combe Martin Wildlife Park, Combe Martin, North Devon, EX34 0NE United Kingdom. Email: [email protected] Phone: 07709 256103
External Links
- Shaunellis.org Currently dead
- Wolfpack-management.com His other site.
- Wannabe wolfaboo calls "Bullshit!" on Shaun.
- And another
- "Man teaches wolf to howl" followed by "Man teaches cows to graze."
See Also
- Wolfaboo
- Biofur It's only a matter of time ...
- Dracoguard
- Ebon Lupus
- WolfJLupus