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Furniture Porn

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Furnitureporn.com is a pornography web site that caters to objectophiles, people almost as fucked up as Furries: the Furniphiles. They have the best taste in porn, since there's nothing more abstractly sexy than furniture items sexing eachother up. Plus, most of the people reading this see furniture every day- unlike women or even animals, which they rarely come in contact with. It's also a good case in point why Web 1.0 sucks. Go to the site and tell me your eyes don't bleed from the horrible page design.

Furniphiles

Furniphiles (or furnies, for short) are people who get off on strategically placing pieces of furniture in compromising positions. Then they take pictures of the furniture and masturbate furiously. Flavors of furnies include:

  • Amateur Seating
  • Bondage
  • Office Party, and the ever popular
  • Outdoors

furnitureporn.com

The most popular furniphile site, furnitureporn.com is also the most comprehensive. Everything from armoires to vanities is depicted humping other pieces of furniture with raw, uncensored detail. Whether it's chair-on-chair, chair-on-desk, or desk-on-desk, all of your filthy perversions can be found here.

Furny Porn is broken up into several subsections, the most lulzy of which is the "Letters" page. There are also user-contributed movies and photos, and it used to have a fairly active Message board which has since e-died.

HAWT CHAIR-ON-CHAIR ACTION (BARELY LEGAL)

  • Two, young, amateur armchairs do the classic 69.
    Two, young, amateur armchairs do the classic 69.
  • Lucy Liu wants to eat out you!
    Lucy Liu wants to eat out you!
  • Now, now Ms. Barrymore. There's plenty of Diaz for everyone.
    Now, now Ms. Barrymore. There's plenty of Diaz for everyone.
  • They really can take this fucking job.
    They really can take this fucking job.
  • Hot, gay, teen lawnchair sluts!!!
    Hot, gay, teen lawnchair sluts!!!
  • A different variety of furni pr0n
    A different variety of furni pr0n
  • Even niggers enjoy it.
    Even niggers enjoy it.

MOAR HAWT SEXXORS

Other uses of furniture porn

People want you to download furnie porn on the chan because it sends the party van to your door. This is because sofa's are hawt and you aren't behind enough proxies for what they put in that "Wood glue""

This article is crap. You can help by completely re-writing it.

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Furniture Porn is part of a series on Psychology
Mental illness & Disorders

Acrotomophilia • Addiction • Agoraphobia • Alcoholism • Alexis Pilkington Syndrome • Alzheimer's • Anorexia • Antisocial personality disorder • Anthropophobia • Anxiety • ADD • ADHD • Asperger's Syndrome • Autism • Bimbofication • Bipolar • Borderline personality disorder • Bug Chasing • Bulimia • Cognitive dissonance • Deep thinker • Depression • Dick Impalement • Down's Syndrome • Dyslexia • Eating disorder • Factitious disorder • Fake Schizophrenia • Fauxlimia • Feminism • Gender dysphoria • Girl on the Internet Syndrome • Heterophobia • Hero Complex • HFA • Histrionic Personality Disorder • Hutchence's Syndrome • Hyperbolimia • Inadequacy • Inconsistent personality disorder • Insanity • Liberal Butthurt Syndrome • Liberalism • Low Self-esteem • 'Missing White Woman' Syndrome • Multiple personality disorder • Napoleon Complex • Narcissistic personality disorder • Neurotypical • Obsessive Compulsive Disorder • Paranoia • Paranoid personality disorder • Peter Pan Syndrome • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder • Psychopathy • Pyromania • Retardation • Schizophrenia • Seasonal Affective Disorder • Self-diagnosis • Self Injury • Sexsomnia • Sickfuckery • Sociopathy • Social anxiety disorder • Special Snowflake Syndrome • Terminological percipience disorder • Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome • Tulpa • Unrealistic expectations • Victim complex

Fetishes:

Acrotomophilia • Aquaphilia • Arborphilia • Audiophilia • Autogynephilia • Balloon Fetish • Bestiality • Carmen Electra complex • Cross Dressing • Dollfilia • Emetophilia • Emosexuality • Eproctophilia • Fatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • Fetishism • Foot Fetish • Furniture Porn • Furrism • Goo girl • Guro • Heterophilia • Homophilia • Inflation Fetish • Japanophilia • Jungle Fever • Lesbian pedophilia • Lotion Play • Macrophilia • Maiesiophilia • Mechanophilia • Mpreg • Necrophilia • Objectophilia • Oedipial Complex • Paraphilia • Pedophilia • Plushophilia • Pregnant Loli • Pregnophilia • Quicksand Fetish • Rangerphilia • Spectrophilia • Statuephilia • Trichophilia • Voraphilia • Wet and Messy Fetishism • Wetlook • Xenophilia • Yellow fever • Zoophilia

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll Syndrome • Deletionism • E-go • E-Psychiatrist • E-Psychiatry • ETD • Hivemind • I-Dosing • I have a 140 IQ • IRC Disease • Imaginary girlfriend • Internet Disease & Internet Disease Chart • Internet poverty delusions • Internet Rehab • Internet troll personality disorder • Mega ultra super genius • Nerdy Fandom Gateway Theory • Sex by association • Lulz-Blindness • Wikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fm • Brainwashing • Hypnosis • Milgram Experiment • Scientology • Stanford Prison Experiment • The Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top Secret • B/ • Bodies Under Siege • CYOC • Chatroulette • Defense Industries Organization • Deeker • FoolQuest.com • InkBunny • Neuticles.com • Psyke.org • WarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric Association • Anger • ASMR • Child abuse • Conscience • Dreams • DSM • Elan School • Enlightenment • Intelligence • Lobotomy • Mary Bell • Psychiatristy • Serial Killers • Take the meat bridge • The Law of Conformity • Trigger Warning

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