Zeriara
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Zeriara is an Epic Lolcow One page alone is not enough... Here's an additional clusterfuck of lulzy content on this furfaggot! |
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Zeriara (pronounced ZUR-Y-ARAH), known nowadays as Seux Twiggy Doodle or 666hailsatanlol666 is an obese pile of furry shit who is horribly afflicted with Internet disease to boot. She spends her time whining on the internetz and drawing furry art of dubious quality. Known in real life as Holly Suzanne Massey, she is also sometimes referred to as Holly Massive by certain loving fans. She used to list her surname as Ramirez in order to be hardcore like Twiggy Ramirez from the band Marilyn Manson and the Spooky Kids...or possibly the actual infamous murderer.
The name "Zeriara" is derived from the names of the characters Zira and Kiara of Lion King 2 fame. She had changed the pronunciation after her mockers started referring to her as 'Zur'. Recently, Zer tried to claim that her name was an acronym (dumb bitch meant anagram) of "Ramirez." However, there is only one 'A' in Ramirez, and no 'M' in Zeriara. Mississippi's education system rears its ugly head once again. Her first fursona was almost—-well, fuck the almost, it was an exact copy of Zira.
For a bit of insight into her past idiocy, please read this fanfic (archived), which contains such amusing lines as "He looked me strait in the eyes..His fear..his pain..OH!!!! It was like a sweet rush of warm honey in my veins! My first merciless killing."
For a while she insisted that she was gender fluid, and preferred to go by Jimmy-Ray, a name her father supposedly 'wanted to give her'. This was after her campaign of hate against transgenders.
Either way, Zeriara started her artistic career with hints of things to come: idea theft. Now, of course, she just engages in plain 'ol grand larceny - if you've given her money for a commission, consider yourself lucky if you ever see your art materialize at all, let alone actually receiving it in person. Past experiences have shown that you shouldn't leave her alone with your stuff at conventions or, god forbid, if she visits you. Given her history of stealing from her own close friends and family, be warned that if you happen to hire her, especially if you run a sex toy store, you can expect thousands of dollars to mysteriously 'disappear'.
In other words, she's an absolute whore who is not to be trusted with your money, your pets, or your artwork.
The Art
Zeriara does not tolerate any criticism of her art, constructive or otherwise; she's fanatical about taking down her entire online galleries after someone critiques her work. Said 'work' is characterized by flat flood-tool coloring, shaky linework, white void backgrounds, and broken anatomy which she usually excuses by claiming it's her "style". Oddly enough, the only thing she's really competent at drawing is the cock, which is strange for a "lesbian." It should also be noted that Zeriara was a much better artist around 2002-2003. That is to say before she burned herself out, and to this day she prides herself on 'talent' that was lost years ago, and still rides the shrinking wave of popularity from that period.
If anyone who doesn't draw particularly well (or at all) tries to critique her work, they'll be openly mocked, with Zeriara often saying they "can't draw their way out of a wet paper bag" anyway, and thus have no right to critique her. This is a lot like saying someone can't think a movie sucks ass without first directing one themselves, and leads to the conclusion that Zeriara and Branca share the very same thoughts about art and stupid Mary-Sueism. However, Zer has been critiqued by artists of a much higher caliber with the same angry, defensive reaction, and throws explosive tantrums if an artist red-lines her work.
She only accepts comments in the form of kissassery from her friends. It had better be more than "nice job" though, anything but excessive asspats will send Zer into a rage.
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STOP. There's MOAR of Zeriara's insanity in the archive! |
Just A Lil' Crazy
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If you're apt to finding the best (or worst) of Zeriara's online foibles, SCREENCAP THE HELL OUT OF THAT SHIT. She is known to delete every trace of her online existence after realizing what an arrogant, blind dumbass she's made of herself with whatever she's just said. |
Zeriara now seems to be embracing her completely broken mentality thanks to internet psychology, and insists on posting the diagnostic symptoms of Antisocial Personality Disorder anywhere she's able. This is not a new idea. It's been speculated many times, including on this article itself, that Zer shows nearly all the symptoms, and it seems she's finally taken the hint and decided to just roll with it. It's easier to use the whole "Antisocial Personality Disorder" shit than to be held accountable for her brutal behavior.
Instead of getting help, Zer will probably continue using this as a way to hide behind it, like the chickenshit she is. And then there's the fact that many serial killers are suspected or known to suffer from this disease, such as Ted Bundy, Jeffrey Dahmer, and John Wayne Gacy. Once again, it all boils down to being as edgy as possible.
She has created imaginary friends and relatives in the past, duping many people into believing they were real. She also has a very bad habit of stalking the few former friends and love interests who have actually existed, which is just another reason to avoid associating yourself with her.
The Commissions
Zeriara will sometimes -- okay, always -- whore herself out for cash, usually in the form of icons which she charges the strikingly high price of $20 dollars per 100x100-pixel drawing for. The saddest part about this? The icons especially display the height of her shoddy workmanship -- when people order multiple icons, she's been known to blatantly copypasta the first icon, and change small details (sometimes flipping the image horizontally if she really wants to go the extra mile) to create the rest of the commissioner's icons. In the past, she's also been known to charge extra for animated icons and then completely fuck up the animation, as you can see below.
If you are unfortunate or foolish enough to commission her, be prepared to wait long months for your work, if you get it at all. She is often seen yelling at her commissioners and telling them off, after they have given her their money, if they ever complain or ask for progress. This goes for traditional, digital, and whatever else commissions you can get from her. Or, if you're stupid enough to mail her the money, it will get lost in the mail.
None of this should come as a surprise given her history with her Monster's Ball annual contest. Out of four years, she has yet to draw the prizes for any of the 12 total winners, even when her 'best friend' Chival mysteriously won. Funnily enough, even after peddling out shitstain after shitstain of fandom-raping 'art' for months, Holly is suddenly unable to draw when reminded of unfinished commissions because work takes up too much of her precious time. Even though most of her crap art is drawn while she should be working.
REAL LIFE ENCOUNTERS WITH TEH ZER
Unfortunately, there are those who have met Zer IRL who have their heads planted so far up her anus that they don't notice all of her glaring, horrible, mind-bending faults. However, not all of her 'friends' are completely retarded--listed below are both those who have suffered the vacuous space of Zer's mind firsthand and decided to share their horror, and those who cling to the idea that she might still have some redeeming qualities somewhere deep within.
PlagueDoctorMD and Psycho Djinn
It seems that Holly has a fetish for FTM trannies, considering she's fucked so many. Or maybe she does it because she thinks she looks pretty in comparison.
Zeriara's old flame, PlagueDoctorMD, has been in stuck in the eye of a shitstorm since being rid of the bitch. As any true furry companion would, PsychoDjinn has repeatedly publicly mocked and provoked Zer "for the lulz," though it's clear he does it because of his butthurt over PDMD's BAAWWing about what a terrible ex Zer was.
However it seems from recent postings of pictures on the Zeriara's Seux username on FA that they have patched things up, evidenced with photos of faggot furry frolickings in the park and lots of shitty fan art of his pink haired bull terrier character Jerico. Perhaps all the medication PlagueDoctorMD is on to become a dude made him forget he was supposed to hate the skank whore till the end of time.
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STOP. There's MOAR PlagueDoctorMD drama in the archive! |
Panda
Much like Zer, Panda is Zer's obese furfag roommate, and also her main minion. Some sources say that Panda and Zer are now a happy couple.
She will leap, roll, or even amorphously wobble into action whenever Zer makes a drama happen, obviously with Zer breathing down her double chins and masturbating.
She's just like every other Zer minion, but with added bonus seeing as she lives with Zer (or rather, Zer lives with her) and is a fat, ugly juggalo. This does not threaten Zer, as they would certainly sink the same boat.
This dastardly duo came together when Panda offered to let Holly move in with her. Not being one to ever pass up an opportunity to mooch, Zer took her up on it to escape her drugged out mother and the tyranny of being forced to lie around and do nothing all day, every day. Zer basically does the same thing, except now she does it in a porn store, although she claims the job is challenging and difficult.
Zer behaves like Panda's pimp, as seen in Panda's DeviantART journals. A trait they share is getting bent out of shape when someone decides to hand them their own ass (i.e. this entire ED article). As heavy and full of shit as they are, you'd think the Terrible Two would be happy to let someone else do it.
Slim Gatsby
The last big issue with someone hanging out with Holly's sorry ass is an unknown snake fursona (read: someone desperate enough to hook up with her at the last Furcon) who reportedly made the mistake of buying her dinner, thus earning himself a one-way ticket to her disgusting pussy. He made it more than apparent he thought Holly "cleaned up well", and that he "had a wicked time" when she roomed with him at one of the last conventions since Zer did not have enough money to pay for a few nights in a hotel.
Slim's FA: http://www.furaffinity.net/user/sgatsby/
Lindsey Jordan aka Chival aka BungleChiv
Zer became friends, both offline and IRL, with Chival back in the early 2000's when they were both wearing rave gear. Chival became Zer's BFF, when it was convenient to her, and they had a jolly time of Internet drama, eating baby bird eggs, showering together and getting shitty tattoos with, and of, each other. In early 2007, however, Zer couldn't resist picking a fight, and the ensuing wank-fest continued until 2009. Both sides of the story - Chival being a stuck up cunt-rag and Zer being a lazy, sycophantic stoner - both seem entirely plausible. Having realised that their respective personality flaws make them perfect for each other, they rectified this situation in 2012 and immediately continued jacking each other off, getting high, and drawing shitty Tumblr art for each other.
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STOP. There's MOAR of Zeriara's batshit insane friends in the archive! |
Her Vices
Animal Cruelty
Many people have witnessed Zeriara's penchant for animal abuse, though few talk about it because of her legions of rabid fans and Zer's ability to lie her way out of almost any accusation. Zer herself often bragged about her killings in the past, and even admitted she reveled in killing smaller and weaker things than herself. She has confirmed that she was not allowed to join the Girl Scouts as a child because of her already prolific history of animal abuse.
So far, known animal abuse:
- Horned toad - Stomped, stuck twigs in its cloaca while it was still alive.
- Chipmunk - Chased it on horseback, stomped its head, then proceeded to skin it with her teeth and play with the skinless corpse. She gave the tail to PlagueDoctorMD.
- Crow - Stomped, ripped off its head while it was still alive, then shoved sticks and its own leg down its esophagus.
- Baby Bird - Took it from the nest, put it on the ground, covered it with rocks, then put her foot on it and ground it into the dirt. Later that night she bragged on DeviantArt about having murdered a baby bird in the park.
- Lizards - Stomped and impaled, Vlad the Impaler style.
- Pet rat - Babies fed to snake.
- Gerbil - (details unknown)
- Kittens, lots of them! - Several over the years (including the mysteriously absent brother of Panda's current kitten) Her own kitten, Toad, she crushed in the woodpile in her backyard.
- Baby Chicken - She and Chival had gotten a pet chick to raise together. Once when Holly got mad at Chival, she took the chick into her back yard, beheaded it with a rusty shovel, then made her boyfriend at the time (Nando) clean up the mess.
- Mice, lots of them! - Caught one in a bag of animal food and killed it. Chased another in Wal-Mart into a corner then stomped it with her boot. Others she had as pets that mysteriously disappeared.
- Frog - Put it in her mouth and swallowed to entertain her little sister.
- Bat - details unknown, though she did post a picture of the corpse to her DeviantArt gallery
- Unborn birds, lots of them! - She and Chival climbed a tree, took bird eggs out of a nest, cracked them open, and ate the contents (something of which both are very proud).
- All of the pets her and her fatass roommate Panda own - The animals are always either sick or have broken bones. It's not uncommon for Zer to make an entry on her furaffinity account asking for money to pay the vet bills.
- Turtle - Went into PetCo. to buy some more kitty litter. She took a small turtle out of a swimtank and dropped it into another swimtank containing Giant Japanese fighter fish, where it was beaten until it drowned.
- Baby Rats - Fed to her snake as she 'bred ones specifically for feeding her snake'. This goes for her adult pet rats as well.
Gettin' Crunk, Dawg
Zer, in yet another act of blatant hypocrisy, abandoned her "DRUGS ARE BAD" motto, and began consistently smoking marijuana, cigarettes, and ingesting mushrooms almost daily. This is even more hilarious because once upon a time, she made various rants, hate-posts, hate-art, and straightedge claims, showing her hate for it all. She claimed that her hate for drugs was caused by her life being oh-so-horrid: living with her mom, never being required to clean her room or get a job.
Funnily enough, around the time she was screaming blue murder about a simple cigarette will send you to Hell, Zer's older art (especially fan art for her favorite artists) often involved heavy drug references, syringes, bongs, and terminology. Drugs are okay as long as talented, more popular people use them.
The following are drugs that she has been discovered to possess, or outright bragged about using:
- Marijuana
- Several varieties of mushrooms, which she gladly gloats about
- DMT, she proudly discusses the 'scary experience' she had with it
- Clove Cigarettes, which are now illegal
She's a Pedo -- But That's Okay!
What Zer and her fans all seem to turn a blind eye to, is that a certain fetish is undergoing a steady progression into reality, and soon enough drawings of young boys won't be enough for Zer. Proof of this is an photo Zer posted in an old, now inactive blog of herself holding a vice grip on a young boy's wrist, kissing him on the lips, while he stared vacantly ahead. This boy was no more than 12 years old and his brother, Jack, was reportedly furious upon discovering the photo, which led Holly to promptly delete it. She now denies ever even posting such content, but fortunately we at ED have retrieved it for your entertainment and horror! It can be seen below.
Some Fun Zer Quotes!
—Zeriara, being hella creepy. | ||
—Zeriara, on Noodle, the fictional and at-the-time fifteen-year-old guitar player in the animated British pop group, Gorillaz. | ||
—Zer again, on accusations of being a child molester. | ||
ZER'S GALLERY OF PEDO DELIGHTS
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STOP. There's MOAR of Zeriara's vices in the archive! |
Of /b/tards and Raids...
4chan
While Zer likes to consider herself a /b/tard, or somehow the next Cracky-chan, the truth of the matter is she is prime lulz. Anonymous likes nothing moar than lulz, so her ventures onto 4chan tend to result in her being relentlessly trolled. She also has a habit of latching on to whatever utterly uninteresting meme has recently fallen out of public favor, drawing and creating endless references long after everyone else has ceased to give a flying fuck.
7chan
Mid-October 2006, 7chan's invasion board raided her. She responded like any decent human being would... by stripping naked and pretending to cut herself, taking photos, and posting them on the thread. She even wrote nonsense like "sup 7chan" in ketchup on her squishy, sagging tits, but she did block out her vagina, making it even moar impossible to fap to her. These images do, however, give us quite a viewpoint into the utter sadness and depravity of her day-to-day life. Aside from the windowless gloom of what is apparently Panda's apartment, one only needs to look at the Snapesnogger-bashing print-out on the wall to see that her life revolves entirely around the internet, stalking people over the internet, getting attention over the internet, and mooching off of her roommate.
All this despite Zer's claims that other people need to "get a life".
Click on any image to see the text she said to 7chan when she posted them.
Fake Cutting aka Attention Whoring
E-mail Hack
On July 8th, 2007, an Anonymous poster on /fur/ hacked into Zeriara's Yahoo e-mail account. Much lulz was had when the OP said all he needed to get into her account was "her birthday, address, and favorite pet," which she happens to post everywhere. Smart. The hacker, in the name of lulz, posted screenshots. Only the best of the e-mails will be posted here, but you can download the entire inbox's worth here!
Shortly after this, another hacker showed up and broke into her e-mail account. This Anonymous hacker took it one step further than the original hacker by apparently trying to bust into her other accounts, such as Photobucket and her LiveJournal. Anonymous failed though, only able to get into a dead Gaia account of hers. This hacker uploaded a .zip containing a bunch of screenshots, which you can download here! Again, only the most lulzworthy screenshots will be posted here.
Zer, being the hardass she is, emailed the hacker begging for her account back. People at /fur/ and the 
zeriara_fanclub felt bad for her, claiming that the hack was going way too far. The hacker pussied out and gave Zeriara her e-mail account back, but not before making her post an apology to humanity on her FurAffinity Journal and in the /fur/ thread itself. Of course, once Zeriara got her e-mail back, she took down the journal and uploaded a file on FurAffinity called "JUST KIDDING!", which is now deleted, of course.
Afterwards, the hacker posted a message on the /fur/ thread, saying that he felt bad for her and gave the account back, admitting that he was a stupid pussy for doing so. He uploaded one last screenshot before the /fur/'s daily flood showed up and the thread disappeared into oblivion. The hacker has not been heard of since.
There have been no hints or clues to who the hackers were, or how many hackers there were. It probably wasn't someone who had a vendetta against Zeriara, seeing as they pussed out and returned her email back to her. The world may never know. For the lulziest e-mails, head on over to the gallery.
7chan Strikes Back
Zer decided that a certain shit-flinging monkey wasn't allowed to comment on her art, because obviously Shit < Pedophile. In response to this 7chan's /fur/ tossed up a thread demanding Zer scat and parody art. A gallery of the ensuing, if a little disturbing, fuckery can be seen here.
Holly hacks PocketBatInc/Ash's email out of emo lard angst
Like any ex-friend of Holly/Zeriara, Pocketbatinc decided to publicize some of the weird-ass shit that Zer's into, along with answering questions about her on zeriara_fanclub. Rather than simply sending an email or message to Ash, Holly's unbridled meth-fueled rage would stop at nothing to see him ruined.
She hacked and cleaned out three of his e-mail accounts and made an attempt to get into his LiveJournal and Paypal - naturally she managed to fuck this up and get herself caught almost immediately. Confronted by many enemies and friends alike, Zer denied it like any spineless cunt, but admitted it when backed into a corner and angsted about how ZOMG HURT she was.
Because I guess stealing someone's character, talking about how you want them to get raped and murdered, making passive-aggressive lyric-filled journal entries, and drawing blatant hate art's awwright, but don't you DARE tell personal stories. She forced him to leave the community before returning his e-mail accounts. This being LiveJournal, this couldn't happen without being accompanied by an enormous wankfest, which luckily has been archived: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6.
Additional Fun
Moronic Statements & MOAR
Sometimes there are screencaps that just don't have a home in any of the above categories, so we put them here so they can fester like Zer's pizzaface. Zer has a habit of saying, doing, and posting some pretty fucking stupid things -- everything here is utterly undoctored for the sake of lulz alone -- hell, Zer practically writes this ED article for us half the time. GALLERY!
Embarassing Photos
It's almost best to think of this as a drinking game: For every roll of fat, take a shot. For every instance of Zur camwhoring in a room with old pizza boxes and crumbs in the carpet, take two shots. For every instance of either drawn-on eyebrows, or general cake-face makeup, take one shot for each layer of foundation. If she forgets to draw on her eyebrows that morning, take a shot. If her head is tilted to the side in 3/4th view to make her look badass and detract from her double chin, take a shot. For any sighting of actual hate art printed and hung on her wall, drink the whole damn bottle. You'll need it.
Once you've memorized the rules, the gallery of embarassing photos can be found over heres.
More retardedness from Zer!
One page is never enough. That's why we have lots more supplemental pages full of Zer's heavily plagiarized, overweight batshit insanity. Click and enjoy.
- A gallery of the real-life retard that is Zer
- Gallery of stolen art and fail
- Gallery of hate art
- Draaammmaa!
- CHAT LOGZ!!1
2015
Worry not, for as of 2015 Zeriara is still going strong! Since DeviantArt and FurAffinity won't let her return, nowadays she can be found scamming people for money on Tumblr and Second Life Needless to say, shes continues to rip thousands of dollars in money and virtual items off people by doing pretty much the same inane shit in which she was doing before.
See Also
- Copyright Infringement
- Crimson-Silvrblood
- Edgy
- Emo
- Furry
- Goth
- HMO
- Insane
- Jax the Bat
- Maneaeve
- Pedophile
- Plagiarism
- Sick Fuck
- Snapesnogger
- Unwarranted Self Importance
Related Links
mynameisskrillex - New FA account- aterribleboy Her BEYOND GAY character roleplaying journal. Check the Flist for even moar Mary Sue lolz.
- flamingmoes
dontaskspookee - Active but no content- 666hailsatanlol666 - Her NEW Tumblr
Zeriaraz - Those poor "pets" of hers were probably brutally killed and eaten soon after the recorder went off.
creepyike - Vacant
hatredy - A Dethklok slash community she has been rumored to either frequent or moderate.- zeriara_fanclub - A fanclub for Zer haters and lovers alike! But mostly haters.
- zeriara - A Zeriara Imageboard over at Dramachan
- VCL Art Account
- Her SoFurry
- Her Furocity
- her Blogspot
- FiendsFridge
- Her FurBuy
- Zerpderp on Sheezy. New posts as of NOVEMBER 2010.
- Steam Community Profile Her Steam account
- Her weasyl account
- Zeriara on Second Life
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Zeriara is part of a series on Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage. |
is part of a series on Second Life  |
Anshe Chung • Boyd Doghouse • BritbongReturns • Christoph Naumova • Felinoid • Hardstylenno • Harrison Digfoot • IntLib • JaSonic • Kalel Venkman • Kopyboat • Krispup • Lemonade Coyote • Mircea Kitsune • MrDisambiguation • Prokofy Neva • Ralph Pootawn • Skuee • Tamias the Chipmunk • Urizenus Sklar • Voland • Yiffy Yaffle • Yoko Beaumont •
Justice League Unlimited • Lost Furest • Patriotic Nigras • FurNation • W-Hat • The Wrong Hands |
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Zeriara is part of a series on Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage. |
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Zeriara is part of a series on </3 EMO </3 [Cut] |
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