Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Jeremy Corbyn

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>ImNotPlaying at 15:30, 14 July 2016. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Soon this face will be forgotten
You gonna get socialised

Jeremy Corbyn is a Communist that somehow against all odds became leader of the Labour Party and promptly fucked it up.

Comrade Corbyn used to be some backbench pinko that had been an MP since the 80's that often campaigned for things that smart politicians who thought about how it would affect them in the future would stay away from i.e. trying to the convictions of some terrorists who bombed the Israeli embassy, who had been found possessing bombs and guns but had tried to say that they weren't going to use them in Britain. He was also a strong advocate against the Iraq War during the Blairite era of the party, which would end up making him the only one in the leadership election to not be a globalist neocon shill.

Jeremy Corbyn's particular style of leadership is to do nothing at all, especially during life-changing referendums, and hope that the socialists of Britain will vote for him regardless.

Corbyn has often been compared to Bernie Sanders, which is an apt comparison given that Corbyn's chances of becoming Prime Minister one day is the same as Sanders' chances of becoming President. Since obtaining leadership of the Labour Party, Corbyn has been thoroughly committed to leading his party into the dustbin of history.

Leadership

Jeremy Corbyn hates America

Like the retards they are, the Labour Party decided to add Jeremy Corbyn into the leadership contest in 2015, as they believed that someone who actually understood how politics works would win instead and just wanted to add him in for the traditional leftist reason; "representation". Corbyn was elected to the leadership by SJW students who think they're wiser and more enlightened than all those who have come before them (minus Corbyn, of course), the unions, and other Leftist buffoons who don't yet realize that the winds of change are blowing in the other direction. Of course seeing as they had never been in a political party before, they took advantage of a new option which allowed them to vote for only £3.

When Corbyn miraculously became leader of the Labour Party, many people in Britain believed that he might be the one to save politics as he wasn't some privately educated yuppie from Cambridge. Instead what they got was the mumbling old socialist who shuffled around in ill-fitting suits and defending Sinn Fein.

However during his time in leadership, the only thing he did that was of anyone's interest was give David Cameron a load of questions to answer on his first day, and then got forgotten about and going on late night talkshows nobody watches.

Brexit

Jeremy Corbyn is still trying to unify Ireland with Sinn Fein leader Gerry Adams.

While many politicians wisely chose a side, Commissar Corbyn did fuck all while pretending to be on the Remain side, and then expected to still be in leadership later on. While he semi-secretly supports Leave, he didn't actually do anything at all to promote this, and just let Nigel Farage take all the glory. This is because communists see the EU as a globalist cabal of evil capitalists dominating over the proletariat via free trade.

Even afterwards when Britain left the EU, he still refused to do anything at all in response, and thinking that this would just blow over and that he wouldn't need to grow a spine and pick a side he should've supported.

Diane Abbott

Like a fine wine Abbott has turned to vinegar with age

Like all middle-class socialists, Corbyn had grown up without having contact with anyone who wasn't exactly like himself. So to prove a point he started fucking Diane Abbott, a fellow MP who turns out was just the right type of black he needed to feel politically well-rounded. His appetite for nubian ladies developed during a stint he spent in Jamaica after university where he spent 3 months trying to show black people how to be poor properly. He clearly maintained this hunger as Abbott featured in his Shadow Cabinet once he was made Labour leader.

Fall from leadership

Like another dictator who refused to quit

Somehow, he still believes that he can become Prime Minister despite the fact he has done little to nothing during the 9 months he's been leader. Almost all of the Labour Party have wanted him to go from the start, it getting so bad that a humiliated lame duck David Cameron telling him to leave. His biggest mistake besides doing fuck all during Brexit was firing the most important man from his Shadow Cabinet, which made everyone else in the cabinet leave in retaliation, which sent his leadership confidence into chaos.

Fall into obscurity

Probably not long after Brexit, Corbyn will likely be kicked out of leadership and will again fall into obscurity.

See also

External Links

Jeremy Corbyn
is part of a series on Politics.
Ideologies: [You are wrong!We are right!]

Alt-rightAnarchyCapitalismCentrismCommunismConservatismCyanismDemocratHippieLiberalismLibertarianismMiltopismNaziNihilismNeo-conPacifismRepublicanReconquistaSocialismStoner GuruTory

Issues: [Fuck it, Too lazy.Get it fixed!]

AbortionArab SpringBahrainBarron TrumpBirthCISPADeath penaltyDrugsEnvironmentalismGaysGeorge Bush doesn't care about black peopleGirlfriendsMarijuana AddictionGround Zero MosqueMarijuana AddictionMass ShootingGun controlGunsHealthcare (2) (3)• HomelessHousing CrisisHuntingIceslaveIranMarriageMiller TestMiltopiaNAUPimpin'RacismShoesTaxesTerrorismUnemploymentWarWelfare

Politicians: [Rigging Elections is funVote for me]

AhmadinejadAkinAOCB.AllenG. AllenAngleAshburnBachmannBhuttoBin LadenH.BidenJ.BidenBlagojevichBlairBoehnerG.BrownS.BrownBunningJim TraficantDubya BushGeorge H. W. BushBurrByrdCainCameronChavezCheCheneyChomskyChretienChurchillClintonClinton IIChelsea Clinton Hillary Clinton CleggCohenColemanCorbynCowgerCraigCthulhuCunninghamCurtisD'AlemaDeanDelayDuterteDwyerEdwardsFaganFiorinaFoleyGerald FordRob FordGellerGillardGingrichGiulianiGonzalesGoreGrahamGravelGreeneGriffinHagueHansonHardingHarperHarrisHitlerHowardHuckabeeHusseinJacksonJamesJidetteJohnsonJohnson, BorisKennedyLaRoucheLBJLottKerryKindKissingerKucinichLewinskyLiebermanLimbaughLoughnerMajorMarceaux.comMarxMcBerryMcCainMcConnellMcHenryMcKinneyMercerMichael BloombergMooreMorocco MoleMussoliniNaderNixonObamaO'DonnellOsbornePainePaladinoPalinPaulPelosiPencePerryPinochetPrittPutinQuahQuayleRasanskyReaganRendellRiceRobertsonRomneyRoveRuddRumsfeldRyanSaakashviliSandersSantorumSchumerSchwarzeneggerSharptonCyril SmithJacqui SmithSpitzerStevensStranahanSupremeTaitzThatcherThompsonThorleyTPMMuckraker MoleTrudeauTrumpVanceVenturaVitterWalzWarsiWashingtonWaxmanWeinerWestWilliamsWilsonWolfowitzXXenophon

Parties: [No beer? Fuck that.Hell yeah, a party!]

America's Third PartyBlack BlocDramacratic PartyHard PartyLemon PartyLiberal Party of AustraliaNorth American DONG PartyOBAMACORNSocialist Workers PartyPirate PartyZapatistas

Tactics: [Rage Quit.How do I get elect?]

2013 US Government ShutdownBlaming ChinaCaptain Nigga DefendaCloward Piven StrategyCritical race theoryCuckservativesDemockeryDoomsday ClockG20 Toronto LollercaustLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberal guiltMacaca#NotMySuperbowlChampsOccupy DemocratsOperation LemonpartyRaped StatisticsThe ResistanceUpworthyWunderground

See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential Elections2020 Presidential Elections2024 USA Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communitiesRoe v. Wade