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Jeremy Corbyn: Difference between revisions
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[[File:Corbyn.jpg|right|150px|thumb|Soon this face will be forgotten]] | [[File:Corbyn.jpg|right|150px|thumb|Soon this face will be forgotten]] | ||
[[File:Jeremy corbyn side eye.gif|150px|thumb|You gonna get socialised]] | [[File:Jeremy corbyn side eye.gif|150px|thumb|You gonna get socialised]] | ||
'''Jeremy Corbyn''' is a [[Communist]] that [[hax|somehow against all odds]] became leader of the Labour Party and promptly fucked it up. | '''Jeremy Corbyn''' is a deranged [[Karl Marx]] reincarnate and [[Communist]] that [[hax|somehow against all odds]] became leader of the Labour Party and promptly fucked it up. | ||
Comrade Corbyn used to be some [[useless|backbench]] pinko | Comrade Corbyn used to be some hard-left [[useless|backbench]] pinko who has been a Labour MP since the early 1980's and often campaigns for things that shrewd politicians who first think about how it will negatively impact them in the future veer away from; i.e. trying to [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1994_London_Israeli_Embassy_bombing overturn convictions of imprisoned terrorists] who bombed the Israeli embassy, and had been [[fail|found possessing bombs and guns but had tried to say that they weren't going to use them in Britain.]] He was also a strong opponent of the Iraq War during the Blairite era of the party, which would end up making him the only candidate in the leadership election to not be a globalist neocon shill. | ||
Corbyns' particular style of leadership is to do nothing at all, especially during [[Brexit|life-changing referendums]], and then hope that the socialists of Britain will vote for him regardless. | |||
He is often compared to Bernie Sanders, which is an apt comparison given that Corbyn's chances of one day becoming Prime Minister is about the same as Sanders' non-existent chances of becoming President. Since becoming leader of the Labour Party, Corbyn has been thoroughly committed to consigning the party to dustbin of history. | |||
==Leadership== | ==Leadership== | ||
[[File:Evil corbyn chortles at 9-11.jpg|thumb|right|300px|Jeremy Corbyn hates America]] | [[File:Evil corbyn chortles at 9-11.jpg|thumb|right|300px|Jeremy Corbyn hates America]] | ||
Like the [[retards]] they are, | Like the [[retards]] they are, Labour Party MPs decided to parachute Jeremy Corbyn into the leadership contest in 2015 to quell the tide of [[Liberal Butthurt Syndrome|butthurt liberals]] and their wailing for broader 'representation'. MPs who did vote for him mistakenly believed that another candidate who was actually somewhat sane in contrast and understood how politics works would instead be victorious when members get their chance to vote. Unfortunately for them, they didn't expect an invasion force of [[Millennials|millennial]] whack jobs to join the party in amass, quickly outnumbering those were already members. | ||
Corbyn was elected to the leadership by [[SJW]] students who | Corbyn was elected to the leadership role by [[SJW]] students who believe they're wiser and even more so enlightened than all those who have come before them (excluding Corbyn, of course), the trade unions, and other Leftist buffoons who don't yet realise that the winds of change are blowing in the opposite direction. Of course seeing as they had never been in a political party before, they took advantage of pre-election offer which allowed them to vote for only £3. | ||
When Corbyn miraculously became leader of the | When Corbyn miraculously became leader of the party, many people in Britain believed that he might be the one to liberate politics and implement meaningful change as he wasn't some privately educated yuppie from Cambridge. Instead what they got was the mumbling old socialist who shuffled around in ill-fitting suits whilst defending Sinn Fein. | ||
During his time as party leader, the only thing he has ever done which was favourable to anyone was to bombard pig-fucker-in-chief and then Prime Minister [[David Cameron]] with a boatload of inconvenient questions he would never be able to answer honestly during Prime Minister's Questions. Other than that, nobody cares to acknowledge his existence, and he would be lucky to get a shout out on late night talk shows that no one watches. | |||
==Brexit== | ==Brexit== | ||
[[File:CorbynAndGerry.jpg|right|200px|thumb|Jeremy Corbyn is still trying to unify Ireland with [[terrorist|Sinn Fein]] leader Gerry Adams.]] | [[File:CorbynAndGerry.jpg|right|200px|thumb|Jeremy Corbyn is still trying to unify Ireland with [[terrorist|Sinn Fein]] leader Gerry Adams.]] | ||
While many politicians wisely | While many politicians during the [[Brexit]] campaign wisely aligned themselves with the Leave or Remain side, Commissar Corbyn did fuck all while masquerading himself as being in the Remain camp. Because most of the imbecilic EU-supporting Corbynite brigade appear to be blissfully ignorant of the fact that Corbyn opposed Britain joining the European Union, and was also in opposition of nearly every major EU treaty in history, he did nothing to support the Leave side, albeit he voted in favour of the referendum and is evidently a closet Brexiter. Instead he allowed [[Nigel Farage]] to bathe in all the glory as he didn't have the courage to slap down his occult-like followers during this once in a life time opportunity. He secretly opposes the EU because communists like himself believe that the EU is [[Obvious|a globalist cabal of evil capitalists dominating over the proletariat via free trade.]] | ||
After Britain voted to leave the [[EU]], he quickly returned to spewing bullshit about how great [[Sand niggers|radical terrorists]] are, thinking that this would just blow over and that he wouldn't need to grow a spine and pick a side after all. | |||
==Diane Abbott== | ==Diane Abbott== | ||
[[File:dianeabbott.jpg|thumb|right|150px|Like a fine wine Abbott has turned to vi[[Nigger|negar]] with age]] | [[File:dianeabbott.jpg|thumb|right|150px|Like a fine wine Abbott has turned to vi[[Nigger|negar]] with age]] | ||
Like all middle-class socialists, Corbyn had grown up without having contact with anyone who wasn't | Like all upper middle-class champagne socialists, Corbyn had grown up without having contact with anyone who wasn't like him; a never-had-a-real-job grammar school attendee who has only ever known a life of representing trade unions and being elected to political positions. So, to vindicate himself, he started fucking Diane Abbott's chocolate punani, a fellow MP who turns out was just the right type of black he needed to feel politically well-rounded. His appetite for Nubian ladies developed during a stint in Jamaica after university, where he spent 3 months trying to show black people how to be poor properly. He clearly maintained this hunger as Abbott attained a role in his Shadow Cabinet and has since received two promotions on the front bench once he was made Labour leader in 2015. | ||
==Fall from leadership== | ==Fall from leadership== | ||
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His biggest mistake besides doing fuck all during Brexit was firing the most important man from his Shadow Cabinet, which made everyone else in the cabinet leave in retaliation, which sent his leadership confidence into chaos. | His biggest mistake besides doing fuck all during Brexit was firing the most important man from his Shadow Cabinet, which made everyone else in the cabinet leave in retaliation, which sent his leadership confidence into chaos. | ||
==See also== | ==See also== | ||
Revision as of 07:25, 18 November 2016
Jeremy Corbyn is a deranged Karl Marx reincarnate and Communist that somehow against all odds became leader of the Labour Party and promptly fucked it up.
Comrade Corbyn used to be some hard-left backbench pinko who has been a Labour MP since the early 1980's and often campaigns for things that shrewd politicians who first think about how it will negatively impact them in the future veer away from; i.e. trying to overturn convictions of imprisoned terrorists who bombed the Israeli embassy, and had been found possessing bombs and guns but had tried to say that they weren't going to use them in Britain. He was also a strong opponent of the Iraq War during the Blairite era of the party, which would end up making him the only candidate in the leadership election to not be a globalist neocon shill.
Corbyns' particular style of leadership is to do nothing at all, especially during life-changing referendums, and then hope that the socialists of Britain will vote for him regardless.
He is often compared to Bernie Sanders, which is an apt comparison given that Corbyn's chances of one day becoming Prime Minister is about the same as Sanders' non-existent chances of becoming President. Since becoming leader of the Labour Party, Corbyn has been thoroughly committed to consigning the party to dustbin of history.
Leadership
Like the retards they are, Labour Party MPs decided to parachute Jeremy Corbyn into the leadership contest in 2015 to quell the tide of butthurt liberals and their wailing for broader 'representation'. MPs who did vote for him mistakenly believed that another candidate who was actually somewhat sane in contrast and understood how politics works would instead be victorious when members get their chance to vote. Unfortunately for them, they didn't expect an invasion force of millennial whack jobs to join the party in amass, quickly outnumbering those were already members. Corbyn was elected to the leadership role by SJW students who believe they're wiser and even more so enlightened than all those who have come before them (excluding Corbyn, of course), the trade unions, and other Leftist buffoons who don't yet realise that the winds of change are blowing in the opposite direction. Of course seeing as they had never been in a political party before, they took advantage of pre-election offer which allowed them to vote for only £3.
When Corbyn miraculously became leader of the party, many people in Britain believed that he might be the one to liberate politics and implement meaningful change as he wasn't some privately educated yuppie from Cambridge. Instead what they got was the mumbling old socialist who shuffled around in ill-fitting suits whilst defending Sinn Fein.
During his time as party leader, the only thing he has ever done which was favourable to anyone was to bombard pig-fucker-in-chief and then Prime Minister David Cameron with a boatload of inconvenient questions he would never be able to answer honestly during Prime Minister's Questions. Other than that, nobody cares to acknowledge his existence, and he would be lucky to get a shout out on late night talk shows that no one watches.
Brexit
While many politicians during the Brexit campaign wisely aligned themselves with the Leave or Remain side, Commissar Corbyn did fuck all while masquerading himself as being in the Remain camp. Because most of the imbecilic EU-supporting Corbynite brigade appear to be blissfully ignorant of the fact that Corbyn opposed Britain joining the European Union, and was also in opposition of nearly every major EU treaty in history, he did nothing to support the Leave side, albeit he voted in favour of the referendum and is evidently a closet Brexiter. Instead he allowed Nigel Farage to bathe in all the glory as he didn't have the courage to slap down his occult-like followers during this once in a life time opportunity. He secretly opposes the EU because communists like himself believe that the EU is a globalist cabal of evil capitalists dominating over the proletariat via free trade.
After Britain voted to leave the EU, he quickly returned to spewing bullshit about how great radical terrorists are, thinking that this would just blow over and that he wouldn't need to grow a spine and pick a side after all.
Diane Abbott
Like all upper middle-class champagne socialists, Corbyn had grown up without having contact with anyone who wasn't like him; a never-had-a-real-job grammar school attendee who has only ever known a life of representing trade unions and being elected to political positions. So, to vindicate himself, he started fucking Diane Abbott's chocolate punani, a fellow MP who turns out was just the right type of black he needed to feel politically well-rounded. His appetite for Nubian ladies developed during a stint in Jamaica after university, where he spent 3 months trying to show black people how to be poor properly. He clearly maintained this hunger as Abbott attained a role in his Shadow Cabinet and has since received two promotions on the front bench once he was made Labour leader in 2015.
Fall from leadership
Somehow, he still believes that he can become Prime Minister despite the fact he has done little to nothing during the 9 months he's been leader. Almost all of the Labour Party have wanted him to go from the start, it getting so bad that a humiliated lame duck David Cameron telling him to leave. His biggest mistake besides doing fuck all during Brexit was firing the most important man from his Shadow Cabinet, which made everyone else in the cabinet leave in retaliation, which sent his leadership confidence into chaos.
See also
External Links
jeremycorbyn - His official Twitter.- That time that Jeremy Corbyn was so angered by the deaths of some pigeons that he ACTUALLY VOTED for the human race to be wiped out by an asteroid