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Vennu Mallesh
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Last Thursday, a man named Vennu Mallesh from Customersupportland decided to unleash his inner creativity for the entire internet to behold. His magnum opus, a song titled "It's My Life What Ever I Wanna Do," delves into great detail about the struggles of a misunderstood Customersupportland zombie. In the song, Mallesh describes himself as still in school, though his mustache clearly marks him as well past puberty aka 30; It's possible he says that because of his initial plan to get close to children, which originally involved an ice cream truck. The song is over 4 minutes long and has no coherent structure. However, Mallesh maintains it's not a song, it's his life.
Vennu Mallesh has recently announced his next HIT Music Video.. which is to be released on 12.12.12. We are blessed with his self obsessed photo reel New Song Teaser.
Things Vennu Mallesh Is - In His Own Words
- Very sentimental
- A very good bad boy
- A night worker
- A self blamer
- A brain eater
- A heart stealer
- A perfect learner
- A back bencher
- A kids lover
- Very anger (but he knows it's very danger)
- The true liar
- A mind reader
- A truth finder
- A smart cheater
- A pain killer
- A good teacher
Things Vennu Mallesh Does - In His Own Words
Lipsika
It is rumored the woman featured in the video, Lipsika, was forced to marry Mallesh by his parents to try to fix their depraved offspring's urges. However, she's fugly so his desire to eat brains instead of that pussy can be excused. Around halfway through the video, she begins to roll her eyes and laugh at Mallesh's inspiring performance, realizing its potential to rival "Friday."
Vennglish
Like all Indians, his grasp of the English language is tenuous at best, Mallesh justified the Engrish lyrics by claiming to have invented his own dialect known as Vennglish. Vennglish is a language in which "than q" means "thanks," and pedophilia cannot be read into words which obviously have intonations of penetrating children.
The Deep Philosophies of Vennu Mallesh
"Just leave everyone, believe only one, if you don't like anyone, live alone" is Mallesh's deepest philosophical truth. Other brilliant quotes of his include "Hummuranatamadhyapradesh jindhwaripur punehwaloo," "Than q for call customer support, how I be help you?" and "I had no idea she only six, she said was nine!"
Update - 9/18/2012
Vennu posted a "vedio" message on his 29th birthday, thanking his fans and "hell wishers" after some horrendous off-key singing. In the video, he explains that his pedo-stache is a symbol of manliness and that he is selling autographed pictures of his face on eBay, for your face-painting pleasure. He also created a website, WorldOfVennu.com, which is likely full of CP. He is also selling his dirty jockstraps, and other personal items on eBay.
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Vennu Mallesh is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |
