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Godwin's Law
—Mike Godwin |
Godwin's Law is the oldest meme on the internet. It was made up in college by a college student named Mike Godwin. According to those who witnessed the event, around 1990, Godwin was actually sleeping in one of his law sk00l classes when he abruptly woke up from a nightmare about one of two former deviant sexual partners of his that we'll simply refer to as either "Lisa B-S" or "Wiggly Toes". His incoherent screaming sounded much like the phrase uttered that has become known as "Godwin's Law":
"As a Jewsnet discussion (Later translated to mean any thread on the internet) grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches one."
According to those who know Godwin or either of the significant whatevers, both of these ladies were Hitler incarnate, which means the nightmare probably had one or both of them gassing the poor bastard in the Camps. Or making hot monkee luv to his fat ass. Same difference.
What followed for Mike Godwin, we can only imagine, was an unremarkable career in stag films. Thereafter, he went on to become the General Counsel for TOW. Seriously.
Usage
There is a tradition in many groups that, once this occurs, that thread is over, and whoever mentioned the Nazis has automatically lost whatever argument was in progress. Godwin's Law thus practically guarantees the existence of an upper bound on thread length. Before he offed himself, Osama Bin Laden had been lobbying for his own variant on the law, and proposed the name "Godwin's Fatwa" for such occurrences. This was denied on many occasions on the grounds that Bin Laden is, in fact, a Arab, and was in fact the last words spoken to him by a friendly, helpful member of the US Navy SEAL Team during their attempt to sell Bin Laden newspaper and magazine subscriptions on May 2nd 2011.
Despite the increasing likelihood of such comparisons, the probability of such a post never actually reaches a certainty. Thus, some argue that a thread can indeed continue into eternity, or until it is cut short by either the indefensible actions of trolls, or g2g i need sleep.
Godwin's Law manifests itself on LiveJournal so often that it spawned a fake journal, aptly named godwin.
Important Safety Tip On Usage
It is no longer necessary to be a Gentile to be a Nazi. For example, Simone is a Jew, but she is still a Grammar Nazi. There is also substantial evidence that the Soup Nazi was a Jew.
If you see any instances of Godwin's Law or its various corollaries/variations, please mail a link and/or transcript. - Aussieintn
The Godwin Variation
Boy, that sounds like a Robert Ludlum book. The Godwin Variation is a natural mutation of Godwin's Law that was almost inevitable as the Law became more and more prolific and respected. In its popularity, it has become a method to voluntarily end one's involvement in a flame war that has outgrown its hilarity. When one or both sides of a war are reduced to ad hominems (IE, "ur a fag," "your dick is small," "girls hate you," "you fuck goats"), it is in the best interest of the war that one's personal involvement be killed outright. To do this, one can respond to one or all comments on the thread with the Fifty Hitler Post, which is simply an outrageous number of images of Adolf Hitler in close succession. This is almost guaranteed to get you banned from the thread, thus ending your involvement. Like Vegas, quit a flame war when you're ahead.
Quirk's Exception
Intentional invocation of this so-called "Nazi Clause" is ineffectual. He will, however, deliver presents on 4/20 of any given year.
Occupancy Effect
It has also been said that when a discussion moves towards who/what occupies Hell that the chance of mentioning Hitler is increased dramatically.
Related Laws
Please see article Internet Law under 'Miscellaneous Internet Laws'.
Gallery of Godwin
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Godwin explains his law.
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"Well, at least I'm not a crook"
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Godwins law as seen in partisan politics
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Wired article about the meme.
Related Articles
- Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle
- Hamtaro's Theory
- Six Degrees of Adolf Hitler
- Aliza Shvarts
- Hitler
- Lollercaust
- Fifty Hitler Post
- Nazis
- DevianTart Nazis
Sieg Heil also
- The law, as handed down on 12 January 1995
- Godwin's Law pronounced dead, 15 March 2016
- Your name here!
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