Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle

Not to be confused with the Hindenburg Uncertainty Principle: What goes up must come down, although we are uncertain regarding when and how fast.

Werner Heisenberg was a German physicist who one day decided to say that in order to measure one quantity, you have to increase the uncertainty of a related quantity. For example, you can't measure the momentum of a immobile object. It has been suggested that he did it for the lulz, but this is made up by Jews who do no want us to see their conspiracy. Heisenberg was awarded the 1932 Nobel Prize in Physics for making Einstein shit brix. These brix were piled up and bukkake'd together with science mortar. Thus was born quantum physics and all matter of very important research like The Secret.

This is how your mind is blown

The Heisenberg Uncertainty principle itself states that you cannot know both the velocity of a particle and its position. The more accurately you get a fix on one, the less accurate your other information becomes. It is therefore something to do with quantum mechanics and also is caused by Jewish scientists who do not want you to locate their gold as it is in constant motion through a patented Jew motion without motion process. The only way around this is to divide by zero, unfortunately even Jew Gold is worthless without a universe. Also, if your speed goes over 9000, then your position is immeasurable, as you are then lost in the realm of /b/.

How Jews work with Nazis to create HUP

• TOW

Killing the stock market

In today's world, Internets Know-It-Alls are now using it to describe the relation between observation and result, most often with the pseudointellectual claim that 'observing something changes the outcome'. For example, if you watch the stock market enough each day, you will trigger the Hindenberg Uncertainty principle. This is in fact, untrue, because no matter how long you look at him, Nathan Sheets will never be pretty.

WE ARE THE NIGGERBORG, RESISTANCE IS FUTILE

In tomorrow's world, Geordi LeForge can defeat this principle with epic win using the transporters on the Enterprise, even though he is a nigra made of Epic Fail (see: efg for reason why epic fail is also epic win). But we in today's world cannot do this because of our insufficient supply of lulz. Several scientists have tried creating moar lulz with lulz generators but they always require human parts and the supply of slaves is insufficient.

The future of lulz

Here is an approximant list of wat humanity will need to do for moar lulz to stop this principle:

• Get many trolls
• Feed them
• Collect lots of Jew gold
• Steal the Jews' plans for building the starship enterprises.
• Tell trolls that building starships out of jew gold insults ppl.
• Take over NASA, then destroy it to wipe the earth of epic space fail
• Build Enterprise A
• Build Enterprise B
• Build Enterprise C
• Build Enterprise D
• Build Enterprise E
• Kill Scott Bakula
• Kill Scott Bakula again
• Kill all other Star Trek Fags who ruined their own show
• Build Enterprise J
• Build Enterprise G
• Build Nebulon-F Frigate...wait OH SHI-
• Build Enterprise H
• Build INTERNET HATE MACHINE (only jew gold, anonymous, and trolls combined can create the one, true internet hate machine)
• Learn the alphabet (optional)
• Build Enterprise X
• Build Enterprise Y
• Build Enterprise AND
• Build Enterprise Z
• Learn Quantum Mechanics (definitely optional)
• Learn Quantum Physics (WTF, there's more of this shit?)
• Build Voyager voyager is epic fail without epic win
• Resurrect Einstein and force him to give up his genius-making secrets
• Enslave Geordi by stealing his Niggervisor and playing keep away
• Become an hero
• No more HUP!!!!1!!1!
• Dead body transported to Enterprise D
• ???? I'm sorry but you need to realize THERE ARE FOUR LIGHTS ONE ?
• PROFIT

See Also

• Godwin's Law
• Hamtaro's Theory
• Schrödinger's cat

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Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle is part of a series on Psychology