Elmo

Elmo knows where you live!

E is for ephebophilia

Some argue that it's all an evil plot by Elmo's arch-nemesis, the greedy manchild, Huxley.

Elmo was a furry, homosexual red monster on infamous kids TV show Sesame Street. The character was apparently created one day when the show's staff decided it would be fun to give some guy a hideous ball of red fur and zero instructions besides "Turn this into something". The resultant abomination became "the embodiment of love" - Elmo. Of course, that's probably before your time. You probably know Elmo best as the advertising powerhouse that Sesame Street uses to make sure the money keeps on rolling in. That ugly little ball of fur has been in over 26 movies and has spawned a countless amount of ungodly merchandise made to separate retards from their Jew gold.

And so, all was well in the world for the creators of Sesame St. until it turned out that "the embodiment of love" was actually second cousin once removed of everyone's favorite bear and had a real taste for shota.

The Creepy

In October 2012 some money-seeking faggot accused Elmo's handler Kevin Clash that he [Clash] fucked him in the ass when he was the tender age of 17. Of course the negro himself claims he thought the kid was 18. Since then dozens of butthurt and lonely attention whores have come out of the woodwork claiming they all have been 'tickled' by Elmo.

Considering the Elmo Line of products, it's not too big a leap to make.

• Elmo is the "Embodiment of Love". Love for young folks from a much older man
• Tickle Me Elmo: encourages young boys to touch low on another man's body to "tickle" them
• Elmo Children's Chairs: Sit your son between the smiling Elmo's legs
• Fireman, Policeman, Indian, ect. Elmo: It's the all Elmo Village people! How did anyone miss it?

The "Victims"

Welcome to da hood!

Sesame Street is of course, set in a ghetto somewhere in New York, and being a ghetto it comes complete with some dude living in the trash can, fairies spreading around "magic dust", hookers on every corner and seven foot tall birds hallucinating about elephants. Part of this realistic setting was the usual drugs and prostitution. Young "aspiring models" selling their wares proved too much for Elmo, and he succumbed to their wiles. In Kevin Clash's defense, they did say they were 18 and were totally asking for it. In typical nigger behavior, Clash claims The Man's just prosecuting him because he's black.

Here is a sample of Elmo's taste in men:

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  "Aspiring model"
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  Asking for it
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  An unnamed victim comes forth and shows the anal devastation wrought by Clash

Elmo back in the day

Sesame Street also made this new line of Elmo toys, encouraging kids to become heroes

Elmo today

While Elmo's attitude towards young boys might be somewhat suspect, it is refreshing and reassuring to know, however, that when it comes to jews, he's right on the money.

Anti-Semitic Elmo in Central Park angry that the Jews didn't donate to PBS

Tickle me gallery

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  Elmo's first time
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  Elmo loved lolis back then
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  Elmo's new look come 2013
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  Elmo's night job.
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  Elmo during his night shift
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See Also

• The Muppets
• PENIS PENIS PENIS

External Links

• Elmo gets hooked up with a bad crowd

Elmo is part of a series on Television Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.