British CSA Inquiry

British CSA Inquiry is part of the kiddie-sex scandal... Jim'll Fix It! Jimmy Savile • Operation Yewtree • BBC • Jim Davidson • Gary Glitter • Rolf Harris • Jonathan King • Dr Fox • Rape Womble • Operation Fairbridge • Greville Janner • Cyril Smith • Margaret Thatcher• Madeleine McCann • Australia • Zionist Jews British CSA Inquiry

After the death of our hero kicked loose the pebbles that started a landslide paedophile panic of pandemic proportions, Her Britannic Majesty's most sovereign Government was pleased to create a Statutory Inquiry into widespread Child Sex Abuse (CSA) within the upper echelons of these realms. At the time of writing (February 2015) it has all gone about as well as one might expect if you asked the British Establishment to investigate itself.

The Inquiry (established July 2014) was expected to examine alleged paedo networks in (but not limited to) Parliament, the House of Lords, the BBC, the Home Office, the Foreign Office, MI5, MI6, the Royal Courts of Justice, the police, the education system and the NHS, hearing evidence from an as-yet unknown number of witnesses and victims and scrutinising events dating back to the end of WWII.

In view of this light workload, the Inquiry was established with the realistic expectation that it would come up with an interim report before the UK's next General Election (May 2015).

From the outset, the Inquiry's independent counsel and official one-man "steering committee" has been Ben Emmerson QC, a close colleague of Tony Blair's fugly missus, Cherie Booth QC. Given that a former Cabinet Minister in Blair's administration is a suspected pedalo who did devious delvings at a children's home and is under (re-)investigation by the police, there's obviously no problem here whatsoever.

So, everything was set up to run smoothly before the show had even started.

On your marks!

The first chairman shoved into the Inquiry's hotseat (8 July 2014) was Baroness Elizabeth Butler-Sloss.

She is the sister of Conservative Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher's Attorney-General Sir Michael Havers (dec'd), who had declined to prosecute Sir Peter Hayman after he was nabbed on kiddy-porn charges.

She had previously whitewashed a paedophile scandal in the Church of England (CEO: HMQ ERII (GBH)), made sure the infamous Cleveland CSA Scandal got swept under the carpet, and been appointed as Royal Coroner to cover up the assassination of Our Queen of Hearts (RIP) before being repeatedly pwnt in the courts by Mohamed al-Fayed after which she had to step down.

So clearly, she was the best person in Britain to launch a no-holds-barred investigation into high-level misdeeds such as these.

She ragequit a week after being appointed, due to her mind-bogglingly massive personal conflict of interest in the matter, which had obviously not been noticed at all by Conservative Home Secretary Theresa May when making the appointment. I mean, it's the sort of mistake we've all made, right?

Get set!

Up next to the block (5 Septmember 2014) was Dame Fiona Woolf, who, as you can tell from her royally-bestowed title, is not a member of the Establishment at all, despite being Lord Mayor of London. And the fact that she was a close neighbour of Leon Brittan was irrelevant, as was the fact that she was close friends with Brittan and his wife and frequently entertained them at dinner at her home.

Fun fact: The street on which Brittan and Woolf lived, Albany Street, Pimlico, was also home to Gareth Williams, the MI6/GCHQ worker who was found dead in his own padlocked holdall in 2010. <-- (lol icon!)

In October 2014, it emerged that (anonymous) Home Office civil servants had repeatedly helped Dame Fiona edit a letter to Home Secretary Theresa May in a way that -- purely by fluke -- gradually disguised her friendship with Brittan.

Because obviously, when you're writing a letter to someone, what needs to happen is that that person's underlings should make sure it's in a fit state to be read by them. This is normal practice when writing letters and emails. In fact, it's widely-held to be a faux pas not to submit a first draft of any correspondence to the intended recipient so that they can make sure it's OK for them to receive.

Fiona Woolf resigned shortly after that.

Go!

On 4 February 2015, just days after the death of Leon Brittan, Theresa May found she had run out of willing fall-guys in the British Establishment, so she appointed half-Maori New Zealand Judge Lowell Goddard to chair the Inquiry. Of course, Her Majesty the Queen (God Bless Her) is still the ruler of Austriaandnewzealand too, so this isn't quite the longshot it might appear.

Developments

Haha, good gag, this is the British Establishment we're talking about here. Nothing is going to happen until 2055 at the earliest, by which time everyone who's guilty will be wormfood and the children who were fiddled with will all be in nursing homes with senile dementia, and the report will tell us gravely that "Mistakes Were Made" and that "Lessons Have Been Learned", and then the report will be filed in a restricted category at the National Archives, until about the year 3000 when finally some fringe historian will unearth it and propose the controversial theory that, you know what, there just might have been a cover-up going on.

Previous champions

• The Saville Inquiry (not who you think, this is about murders in 197fucking2): Established 1998, report finally issued 2010
• The Iraq Inquiry (AKA The Chilcott Inquiry): established 2009 to look into events in 2002-3, report still not published. (There is now a longer gap between the Inquiry being set up and its report being issued than there is between the Inquiry being set up and the events it's meant to be examining).
• The Princess Di Inquest, repeatedly stalled from 1997 onward until finally stitched up in 2008

Hold on: Is it even possible for the Government to rig an Inquiry to get the result they want?

You were saying?

External links

• The British CSA Inquiry's website

British CSA Inquiry is part of the kiddie-sex scandal... Jim'll Fix It! Jimmy Savile • Operation Yewtree • BBC • Jim Davidson • Gary Glitter • Rolf Harris • Jonathan King • Dr Fox • Rape Womble • Operation Fairbridge • Greville Janner • Cyril Smith • Margaret Thatcher• Madeleine McCann • Australia • Zionist Jews British CSA Inquiry