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Halle synagogue shooting: Difference between revisions
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{{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No, [[v&]]}} | {{Ibrow|'''[[An Hero]]?'''|No, [[v&]]}} | ||
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*Much more reliable and simple than the Luty, yet he still managed to fumble it. '''20 Damage''' | *Much more reliable and simple than the Luty, yet he still managed to fumble it. '''20 Damage''' | ||
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*'''Tersiary''': Single shot .38 special pistol | |||
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File:BallietMugshot.jpg|Mugshot of Stephan | File:BallietMugshot.jpg|Mugshot of Stephan | ||
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file:StepehenYNAK.jpeg|You need a key, retard. | file:StepehenYNAK.jpeg|You need a key, retard. | ||
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Latest revision as of 00:05, 7 November 2024
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The FBI has offices around the world and can be contacted around the clock, every day of the year. |
—Stephan to the livestream before failing at EVERYTHING, nobody wants to be friends with you, RETARD. | ||
Previous Quote | Next Quote
| Stephan Balliet | |
|---|---|
| Born | January 10, 1992 (32 years old) |
| Nationality: | Kraut 
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| Highscore | 2 killed, 2 injured |
| Top 50? | Nope. |
| Style | FPS single player, open world VR |
| An Hero? | No, v& |
| Motive | Antisemitism, Autism |
In the final months of 2019, after the epic crusade of Brenton Tarrant and his disciples who followed, a new hope appears over the horizon of Evropa… of ze name Stephan Balliet卐 (aka Door Cuck, Jüdischeholztürcuck and Anon) a round-headed Nazi weeaboo who on the Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur tried to get the High Score by shooting up his local ZOG branch (a synagogue) in Halle, Germany.
Unlike most other Tarrant copycats, he actually managed to livestream his “shooting”, however, the audience of what was supposed to be a show of lulzy proportions were heavily disappointed as our little Saviour of the White Race failed to open the wooden door of the synagogue, killed one of his own people before driving to a Turkish kebab shop out of shame and killing a random customer using shitty 3D printed guns that barely worked before getting shot in the neck (which he unfortunately survived) and being arrested by Polizei. What a failure. Oh, did we mention he still lived with his Mutter? Lol.
Backround
Before snapping, Stephan was just like any other manlet, he had an unhealthy obsession with anime girls and was a true patriot to /a/. Apparently, he worked for the German Armed Forces, and there he was taught "how 2 gunz".
So what happened? What made this manlet snap? The simplest answer here is that he read a little too much Tarrant and wanted to be just like him. Unfortunately for him, krauts can't succeed in doing shit (except for that one guy), and Stephan, being cursed a Kraut at birth, never got his plan of being an elite white nationalist race warrior to come to fruition.
Living in Krautland, Stephan knew he couldn't get guns the easy way, so he concluded to make them himself using recipes which are usually more reliable than you'd expect, however the problem was not the guns but him, he was too retarded to assemble them properly, meaning that 80% of the time, his Jew Remover 9000 would jam and not fire. Alongside his “guns”, he manafactuated some overglorified firecrackers in attempt to pass them off as grenades, these would also go on to do nothing of value. He posted his manifesto, images and livestream linked to some completely unknown imageboard that nobody cared about called Meguca, which was subsequently closed after his shitty "attack".
Ze Manifesto
Since he's retarded and posted his manifesto on some imageboard nobody cared about and didn’t choose 8chan, parts of this manifesto was temporarily lost, however our top team of experts here at ED were able to find it!
WARNING: ITS EDGY AND CONTAINS ANIME (scroll to see the full docs)
Ze Shooting
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Watch the stream here! And here's it translated but in lower quality. |
After "careful planning", On the 9th of October (Yom Kippur hahahaha!) our crusader posted his livestream link to that one imageboard in preperation for what would be the biggest fail to grace our eyes.
The livestream begins and we get a shot of his camera just pointing downwards to the crusty interior of his car, whilst he proceeds to do fucking nothing for 4 minutes until finally picking up the camera and introduces himself. He then proceeds to do fucking nothing for a little longer until finally beginning his journey to the local ZOG whilst blasting Mr. Bond through the radio.
He arrives at the 'gogue and with his "guns" and attempts to open the wooden door before realizing its locked. He pushes, kicks and shoots the door whilst shouting "Fack!" and "Scheiße!" like a 12-year old losing at Counter-Strike. Realizing his physical strength is not a match for the wooden door, he whips out his shitty explosives and tries to bust it open, which doesn't work. Because Stephan is being loud as fuck, an old white German granny carrying a bottle of Mountain Dew (gamer approved!™) in her bag walks by and trolls him about the loud noise he is making, Stephan responds by fumbling with his shitty "gun" and shooting her which causes a bunch of dust to spew from the "gun".
After trying the door again, he walks up to the granny's body and shoots it again for some fucking reason, wasting ammo and also shooting his own car tire in the process. LOL! Keep in mind, the jews inside of the synagogue are watching all this occur from the CCTV, probably rofling at his incompetence.
Stephan then stumbles around to a different pathway to the synagogue (which leads to MORE LOCKED DOORS LOL) before going back to the street and shooting the same wooden doors with his "shotgun" whichs fails again. A random car drives past which he shoots at for no fucking reason. Realizing he has been cucked by a wooden door, he drives away in shame to a Turkish kebab shop, he throws a shitty bomb into the shop which kills a random customer.
He goes in and fails to shoot anybody as they all run into the backroom, he shoots a crying employee in the head which didn't even kill the guy. He leaves and gets into his car which he cant even drive cause of his fucked tire, gets shot in the neck by police, discards the camera on the side of the road, running for it before getting v&. He will forever be known as Door Cuck. What an absolute failure.
Loadout
| Class Setup | |
|---|---|
| Item | Accessories/Bonus |
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Graded Score
| Kill count: | 2/20 Two of his own people |
|---|---|
| Accuracy: | 0/20 Too bad for his guns! |
| Style: | 2/20 Brenton Tarrant wannabe and inspired Payton Gendron to stream it, got cucked by a door |
| Butthurt: | 3/20 Basically forgotten in Germany and for some shit imageboard no one knows about. |
| Bonus: | 12/20 Sieg Heil’d in court, tried to escape prison twice |
Wanted Level:
Bundesnachrichtendienst
Aftermath
After a super long epic police chase, he got epicly v&'d and was escorted to a POLIZI choppa. 14 months later, he went to court and is now serving the life sentence for his two frags and "50" attempted murders, the judge called this act a cowardly one.
He tried to escape his medium security prison but got caught, which led to him being moved to a maximum security prison, which shows this guy will keep failing even in the doghouse. He also held 2 guards hostage once with a gun made out of ...paper? Don't ask how because we don't fucking know.
This guy was an retard who used malfunctioning guns, made practically no plans beforehand and livestreamed his "attack" in attempt to be remembered, but now years after this ordeal (at the time of writing) nobody remembers him, except for retards like you and I, Stephan will now spend the rest of his life in a box, he ruined his life for practically nothing. ROT IN JAIL DOOR CUCK
Gallery
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Wtf gunz -
His drip -
Stephan after getting shot in the neck by Polizi -
Surveillance photo -
The hero of the story, lol -
Mugshot of Stephan -
Stephan in court -
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”Mai waifu” -
Jew door is the winnar! -
Same meme, jewish victory. -
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Rest in Peace Granny -
White Boy is CUCKED HARD by a BJD -
You need a key, retard. -
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See Also
- White Nationalism - What he stands for.
- Germany - Where he lives.
- Anders Behring Breivik - One of his inspirations and a much better example of what Europe has to offer.
- Brenton Tarrant - His other inspiration.
- Patrick Crusius - Drunk guy who got a better score by shooting up a spic-infested Walmart.
- Philip Manshaus - Breivik's failson who somehow did even worse than Door Cuck.
- John Earnest - Got a lower score, but was somehow less embarrassing.
- Payton Gendron - Stephan inspired this fedpost to stream his attack and write his name on his guns.
- Alexandre Bissonnette - Shot up a mosque.
- William Atchison - Another failure who got cucked by an inanimate object.
- Robert Bowers - Shot up a synagogue successfully, unlike Door Cuck.
External Links
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Halle synagogue shooting
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