Roy Moore

This faggot waits for the child to make the first move in a sexual situation. You can help by contacting Federal Authorities and alerting Chris Hansen.

File:Roy moore.jpg

Would an actual pedophile settle for a tiny peashooter like that?

	“	I don't remember ever dating any girl without the permission of her mother.	„
	—Roy Moore, admitting that the only thing he did wrong was asking the bitch's mother first.

Judge Roy Moore is a Republican from the great state of Alabama, and the latest target of a coordinated liberal smear campaign trying to paint him as a Grand Old Pedophile. Famous for being removed from the bench of the Alabama Supreme Court - twice - for standing his ground against the fedora-tipping U.S. Supreme Court and their radical atheist agenda, Judge Moore is both the hero we need and the hero the hillbillies of Alabama deserve, valiantly defending Christian safe spaces from the forced removal of Ten Commandments sculptures and the deeply disturbing sight of faggots getting married.

Accused of stalking young girls at malls and grabbing a 14 year old girl by the pussy, Roy Moore was slated to win the race for United States Senator in the state of Alabama by every credibly news outlet. If it weren't for the deep state rigging the election, it would have been taken as undeniable proof that even an accused pedophile is still better than a Democrat (which they are), which would have resulted in the greatest rustling of liberal jimmies since The Donald won the presidency. Of course, it was not meant to be; apparently, Judge Roy "Dindu Nobody" Moore was too much of a redneck fundie even for Alabama.

Needs Moore Loli

Photographic "evidence" that the Washington Post dug up from the Gadsden Mall.

Down in the podunk hillbilly hellhole known as Gadsden, Alabama in the 1970s, there lived a prosecutor known as Roy Moore. Tasked with the unenviable mission of locking up niggers and spics who run afoul of the law, the man answered the call like any noble defender of white Christian values would: Hoard as much hot, young pussy as he possibly could, and spread his pure white seed all throughout the land of Dixie. Because Comet Ping Pong wouldn't open for another thirty years, his only source of underage poon were Christian fundamentalists, who happily whore their daughters out to 30-something-year-old men in exchange for marriage dowries. Since toothless, redneck crack whores rank somewhere between Mexicans and niggers in crime rates, he figured his place of work, the local courthouse, would be his best bet. While some Jerry Springer reject was on her way into the court room, he offered to babysit her daughter for her. Apparently, he was such an upstanding gentleman with the girl that her mother gave her blessing to pick up the girl whenever and wherever he wanted, including school. Doing what any god-fearing, Christian man would do, he called her in the middle of class, picked her up, took her back to his place, and then made the bitch strip down to her bra and panties and touch his Jesus stick.

Of course, eventually she got too old, so he started trawling the local mall in Gadsden looking for a replacement. Of course, some awkward, creepy faggot pathetically asking girls' mothers if they want grandkids was just a little too unsubtle, so he was allegedly b& from the premises. The mall claims that there's no record of this, but because it's sexist to imply that women ever lie about this sort of thing, we can only assume that this only means that the little sluts' mothers said no even after their daughters said yes.

For nearly forty years, the women all kept their mouths shut about Judge Moor slamming his gavel into their tribunals, a stretch of time even Harvey Weinstein himself could only dream of. It wasn't until the Washington Post conveniently found these innocent victims and offered them monetary compensation for their testimonies that this story of a God-fearing man on his Love Quest ever came to light. What would we ever do without them?

Fake News, Real Jews

Judge Moore ultimately came within a hair of winning the Senate seat, being the first Republican to lose to a Democrat for the position in a quarter century. Despite being a tr00 Christian, he made the mistake of fucking underage girls who weren't his cousin or his sister, which, to Alabamians, is a cardinal offense. Faced with an overwhelming horde of nigger, women, and millennial voters, an unprecedented campaign of suppression of the redneck vote, and the entire Deep State working overtime to prevent a real Christian from disrupting their plans to institute a global Islamo-Communist New World Order, Moore ended up losing the race 50% to 48%, with the remaining 2% going to write-ins.

Of course, because God promised him in a dream that he would win, even one week after the race, Moore has refused to concede the race. With even The Donald abandoning him, there seems little hope of a recount being unable to overturn the will of the Deep State. But hey, at least the Jews still get their tax cuts.

Roy Moore on The Issues

	“	I think it was great at the time when families were united — even though we had slavery.	„
	—Roy Moore, on the subject of niggers.

• Abortion: Murder. Unless it's one of his babies with an unwed teenaged whore who viciously seduced him, in which case, flush that toilet.
• Niggers: America was better off under slavery.
• Guns: There's a nigger, pull the trigger.
• Islam: Muslims are unfit to serve in the United States Congress, Islamic Sharia law is incompatible with American law due to its un-American religious tenets.
• Christianity: Christians are only fit to serve in the United States congress, Christian biblical law is American law due to its uniquely American religious tenets.
• Homosexuality: God hates fags.
• Pedophilia: It's okay if you ask their mothers first.

See Also

• The Donald
• Judge William Adams
• Pedophilia
• Asking for it
• Dindu Nuffin

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