Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

Lee L. Mercer Jr

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is the current revision of this page, as edited by imported>Sidecar at 11:58, 2 February 2017. The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this version.
(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to navigationJump to search

Lee L. Mercer Jr. is a "Nigger American Citizen" who ran for President of the USA in the 2008 election. He is a Democrat, a former dental technician, an ex bill collector and is 100% sane. According to the FEC, he raised more than 900 million dollars in fundraising during the election, and he spent every penny [1]. In 1992, the State of Texas installed an "intelligence hotwire" in him that "cannot be unhooked by anyone."

According to his impressively-designed web site, Mercer's campaign platform is as follows:

   
 
The United States Government must regulate government sleepers and government regulations authorized thought, ideas, acts, actions, rights, wrongs, controversies, facts, issues and circumstantial evidence through intelligence research, law research, law enforcement research and criminal law research implementing ROTC communications research innovating education national and international.
 

 
 

—George Orwell

Early Life

Lee Mercer Jr. was born at an early age. Strangely enough, there is no Lee Mercer Sr. in his family tree.

Reasons for Candidacy

One of his goals was to prove the United States government killed his sex life, his wife's sex life, both his sons' sex lives, his daughter-in-law's sex life and various other family members' sex lives "with Espionage Experimentation and Espionage Exploitation sex killing." Another is "to prove Jeb Bush is all in my house with disease."

On The Issues

As the only black person to ever be abducted by a UFO, Lee Mercer speaks fluent ebonic gobbledygook and is an expert on intergalactic issues both big and small. As such, he is the only credible candidate to boldly go where no candidate has gone before...to take planet Earth and mankind into the future as part of the Federation of Allied Galaxies.

   
 
Once, I am elected to the office of President of the United States of America the thing I am going to do for the people is regulate the office of the President of the United States of America right and not wrong.
 

 
 

—Lee L. Mercer Jr. AKA The Regulator

See Also

Lee L. Mercer, Jr.


Lee L. Mercer Jr
is part of a series on Politics.
Ideologies: [You are wrong!We are right!]

Alt-rightAnarchyCapitalismCentrismCommunismConservatismCyanismDemocratHippieLiberalismLibertarianismMiltopismNaziNihilismNeo-conPacifismRepublicanReconquistaSocialismStoner GuruTory

Issues: [Fuck it, Too lazy.Get it fixed!]

AbortionArab SpringBahrainBarron TrumpBirthCISPADeath penaltyDrugsEnvironmentalismGaysGeorge Bush doesn't care about black peopleGirlfriendsMarijuana AddictionGround Zero MosqueMarijuana AddictionMass ShootingGun controlGunsHealthcare (2) (3)• HomelessHousing CrisisHuntingIceslaveIranMarriageMiller TestMiltopiaNAUPimpin'RacismShoesTaxesTerrorismUnemploymentWarWelfare

Politicians: [Rigging Elections is funVote for me]

AhmadinejadAkinAOCB.AllenG. AllenAngleAshburnBachmannBhuttoBin LadenH.BidenJ.BidenBlagojevichBlairBoehnerG.BrownS.BrownBunningJim TraficantDubya BushGeorge H. W. BushBurrByrdCainCameronChavezCheCheneyChomskyChretienChurchillClintonClinton IIChelsea Clinton Hillary Clinton CleggCohenColemanCorbynCowgerCraigCthulhuCunninghamCurtisD'AlemaDeanDelayDuterteDwyerEdwardsFaganFiorinaFoleyGerald FordRob FordGellerGillardGingrichGiulianiGonzalesGoreGrahamGravelGreeneGriffinHagueHansonHardingHarperHarrisHitlerHowardHuckabeeHusseinJacksonJamesJidetteJohnsonJohnson, BorisKennedyLaRoucheLBJLottKerryKindKissingerKucinichLewinskyLiebermanLimbaughLoughnerMajorMarceaux.comMarxMcBerryMcCainMcConnellMcHenryMcKinneyMercerMichael BloombergMooreMorocco MoleMussoliniNaderNixonObamaO'DonnellOsbornePainePaladinoPalinPaulPelosiPencePerryPinochetPrittPutinQuahQuayleRasanskyReaganRendellRiceRobertsonRomneyRoveRuddRumsfeldRyanSaakashviliSandersSantorumSchumerSchwarzeneggerSharptonCyril SmithJacqui SmithSpitzerStevensStranahanSupremeTaitzThatcherThompsonThorleyTPMMuckraker MoleTrudeauTrumpVanceVenturaVitterWalzWarsiWashingtonWaxmanWeinerWestWilliamsWilsonWolfowitzXXenophon

Parties: [No beer? Fuck that.Hell yeah, a party!]

America's Third PartyBlack BlocDramacratic PartyHard PartyLemon PartyLiberal Party of AustraliaNorth American DONG PartyOBAMACORNSocialist Workers PartyPirate PartyZapatistas

Tactics: [Rage Quit.How do I get elect?]

2013 US Government ShutdownBlaming ChinaCaptain Nigga DefendaCloward Piven StrategyCritical race theoryCuckservativesDemockeryDoomsday ClockG20 Toronto LollercaustLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLiberal guiltMacaca#NotMySuperbowlChampsOccupy DemocratsOperation LemonpartyRaped StatisticsThe ResistanceUpworthyWunderground

See also: 2012 Elections2016 Presidential Elections2020 Presidential Elections2024 USA Presidential ElectionsInternet PoliticsPizzaGatePolitical communitiesRoe v. Wade