Tibet

	“	Today its justifiably to lament that the Tibetan culture is oppressed by Chinese. But we should not forget that the Tibetan culture ís born of a Religion, which was much more brutal and that People in Tibet were oppressed like in the worst Dictatorship. So every uncritical sentimentalism with the Dalai Lama and Tibetan Monks is forbiden	„
	—Ulrich Wickert

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The Dalai Lama

Tibet, also known as North Myanmar is a gook-infested region of the People's Republic of China. Tibet was formerly led by a religious nutcase called the "Dalai Lama", until the Maoists decided that China wasn't big enough, and invaded. Today, Tibet is a place that freedom-lovers support yet refuse to actually help, due to their addiction to cheap, poisoned products from Chinese sweatshops. Despite burning monks and riots, China claims that it did more good than harm and "advanced" Tibetan people.

History

Despite what free Tibet supporters think, Tibet is not some magical Shangri-la kingdom, but actually a mountainous shithole where 95% of the population lived as slaves and thralls, who toiled on the mountain to feed their pimps: AKA the monks, priests and lamas, exactly the same as any theocratic, prescientific, authoritarian shithole anywhere in history. We are talking about people who, for instance, punished thieves by tearing out their tendons. Before glorious socialist liberation, the peasants lived as property of the monks, who happily donated their body parts to the monks, such as giving their thighbones to make musical instruments, their skulls to make cups for the monks, and their asses to pleasure the monks. In past centuries, Tibet had political dealings and intrigues with rapist tribes from China and Mongolia such as the Khoshut and Dzungar. They were also involved in warfare and civil war, such as the conflict between Red Hat and Yellow Hat Buddhists. Clearly, Tibet was a real place, not a mystical new-age hippie kingdom.

The myth of Shangri la really only existed as a myth for hipster faggots and losers suffering from Unwarranted Self-Importance who think that waving retarded flags and shouting retarded slogans is the next best thing since pissing in a pot and smearing it on yourself. More likely, they would rather that corner of the world and the people in that country live in the stone age, just so they have something to fap to. The destruction of the myth would result in many retarded hippies noticing how empty their lives are, and would cause them to all An hero.

In 1950, Mao got sick of the lama's shit and the People's Liberation Army came and rocked the monks world. The Tibetan military's sticks, swords, rocks, and US-provided weaponry were ineffective against the Chinese tanks and machineguns. The UN didn't do anything, since they didn't remember Tibet ever being a real country and had forgotten about the whole self-determination concept in favour of abolishing slavery.

Dalai Lama

The Dalai Lama is the official pope of Tibet. Pope as in spiritual leader, not a mouth piece for a pedophile organisation, but Lamas also very, very child-friendly. Each Dalai Lama is supposed to be the reincarnation of the previous Dalai Lama. After failing to expel the Chinese from Tibet, the Dalai Lama fled the country and was forced to continue ruling in exile. Now China seems to have forgotten about him, considering how the government haven't sent any hit squads to kill him yet, fucking amateurs.

Immigration

Large quantities of Chinese and Indians surround Tibet, and the former has the habit of flooding Tibet with unwanted immigrants and baby-eating habits. At the same time, smart, wealthy, freedom-loving Tibetans emigrated from their homelands in order to better their lives, leaving their beloved slaves behind. It is believed that without the building of a barrier, Tibet will become 100% Chinese, and the Free Tibet movement would be for nothing. Disregard that the new railway thats just been recently built means what at least 100% of the population of Tibet is now Chinese.

Language

Tibet's language is literally incomprehensible. It all started in the 600s AD when སྲོང་བཙན་སྒམ་པོ (transliterated as Srong Btsan Sgam Po but pronounced as Songtsen Gampo for whatever reason) sent some guy to India to steal their alphabet. He brought back Sanskrit, but Mr. Gampo said it wasn't fucked up enough, so he made a language whose historical spelling made the language completely indecipherable to foreigners. It also doesn't help that their script looks like Klingon. People still don't understand how words are transliterated and pronounced differently. Do these guys just love having extra consonants?

Human rights

Self-immolation in Tibet

As with the rest of China, human rights are in short supply in Tibet. In the eyes of the Chinese, human rights is a foreign idea created by Westerners in order to make Communism even more difficult to implement. The Chinese believe that the biggest threat to establishing a firm Maoist grip on Tibet is traditional Tibetan culture and religion. As a result, the Maoists forced most of the monks inside of the country out and attempting to erode Tibetan culture through propaganda and torture. Tibetans oveseas, however, work hard to preserve Tibetan culture by adopting rap, speaking English and not learning Tibetan, and putting US flags on their children (ironically, most US flags are made in China).

Ways to troll Tibetans und Free Tibet Activists

• Ask them how the olympic boycott went.
• Tell them no one cares about Tibet (they don't lol)
• Tell them that since Tibet was conquered in the Yuan dynasty, and later the Qing dynasty, it counts as Chinese territory.
• Ask them why doesn't the Dalai Lama allow people to worship Dorje Shugden.
• Drive a column of tanks up to them, and don't stop.

See also

• East Turkestan
• Buddha
• China
• Hot Tibet
• Kurdistan
• Palestine
• South Ossetia
• Shit nobody cares about
• Avatar the Last Airbender

External links

• Tibet at TOW
• Dalai lama's offical website
• Apparently the dalai ain't as clean as they say
• Tibet as fap material for some retarded white kids