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Full House

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Full House (aka Fail House) is a painfully unfunny sitcom that's known to be one of the most G-rated shows of all time; favorite TV show by pedophiles, closet homosexuals, 8 year old girls and you. The show takes place in San Francisco, with three unmarried men living in a house with three little girls. The show launched the "acting" career of Bob Faget and the Olsen Twins. It also managed to turn many people into home bitches.

Michelle Tanner
Joey love sweet little Stephanie Tanner


Characters

Danny Tanner - Pedophile A father of three little girls and depressed widower who masturbates to peewee football. (character based on Bob Saget).

Joey - Danny's previous gay partner and a shit comedian who's jokes give cancer survivors AIDS. Also a pedophile that lures in small children with his Puppets.

Jesse - A self proclaimed ladies man and a pretentious Elvis wannabe son of a bitch who wants to be a "rock and roll" star although he has no actual talent and is a failure as a parent. He desperately needs a hair cut on several cases of it being mistaken for a bush monster.

Rebecca - Jesse's wife, coming from a white town in Nebraska. Teaches her housemates square dancing, therefore making her the object of white trash in the house.

D.J. Tanner - Teenage Mary Sue a fat cow who is constantly getting in trouble for offering blowjobs to desperate nerds.

Stephanie Tanner - Middle daughter played by Jodie Sweetin, before she discovered the wonders of meth, she now stars on the popular Nickelodeon show iCarly as the goofy sidekick.

Michelle Tanner - Youngest of the daughters; known for getting raped nearly every other episode. Portrayed by the Olsen twins.

Nicky and Alex - Jesse's Aspie children who are constantly abused by their parents to the amusement of the audience.

Steve Hale - D.J.'s forced boyfriend and frequent cannabis user. He always want to get some but DJ is too busy eating to even notice.

Kimmy Gibbler - Giant enemy crab and all out closet case. Unbeknownst to the Tanner family, she ends up becoming famed porn star.


See Also

 

Full House is part of a series on

Television

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