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Elmo: Difference between revisions

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[[File:Kevin Clash and Elmo.jpg|thumb|Elmo knows where you live!]]
[[File:Kevin Clash and Elmo.jpg|thumb|Elmo knows where you live!]]
[[File:Elmokid.gif|thumb|'''E''' is for [[wikipedia:Ephebophilia|ephebophilia]]]]
[[File:Elmokid.gif|thumb|'''E''' is for [[wikipedia:Ephebophilia|ephebophilia]]]]
[[File:Kermit goatse.jpg|thumb|Another victim comes forth and shows the anal devastation wrought by Clash]]
[[File:MakeItMine.jpg|thumb|[[Some argue]] that the whole controversy has been manufactured as part of an evil plot by Elmo's arch-nemesis, the [[Jewish|greedy]] [[manchild]], [http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Huxley Huxley].]]
[[File:MakeItMine.jpg|thumb|[[Some argue]] that the whole controversy has been manufactured as part of an evil plot by Elmo's arch-nemesis, the [[Jewish|greedy]] [[manchild]], [http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Huxley Huxley].]]
'''Elmo''' <s>is</s> [[disregard that|I mean]], was a [[furry]] [[Communist|red]] monster on Sesame Street. If you don't know what Sesame Street is fuck you, go back to the [[Taliban]]. The character was apparently created one day when the show's staff decided to be dicks and give the [[fag]] on the way out a hideous ball of red fur and zero instructions besides "[[DO IT FAGGOT|Make something out of it]]". Nobody else wanted to be seen on or off stage with the ugly thing anyway.
'''Elmo''' <s>is</s> [[disregard that|I mean]], was a [[furry]] [[Communist|red]] monster on Sesame Street. If you don't know what Sesame Street is fuck you, go back to the [[Taliban]]. The character was apparently created one day when the show's staff decided to be dicks and give the [[fag]] on the way out a hideous ball of red fur and zero instructions besides "[[DO IT FAGGOT|Make something out of it]]". Nobody else wanted to be seen on or off stage with the ugly thing anyway.
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* Elmo Children's Chairs: Sit your son between the smiling Elmo's legs
* Elmo Children's Chairs: Sit your son between the smiling Elmo's legs
* Fireman, Policeman, Indian, ect. Elmo: It's the all Elmo [[Homosexual|Village people]]! How did anyone miss it?
* Fireman, Policeman, Indian, ect. Elmo: It's the all Elmo [[Homosexual|Village people]]! How did anyone miss it?
==The "Victims"==
Everyone knows Sesame Street is set in a ghetto, complete with some dude living in the trash can and yellow birds hallucinating about elephants. With this realistic approach to Sesame Street's setting came the hookers. Sexy 16 year olds wandering Sesame Street selling their wares was just too much for Elmo, and he succumbed to their wiles. Here is a rogue's gallery of sexy:
{{center|<gallery>
File:Sheldon Stephens.jpg|"Aspiring model"
File:Cecil Singleton.jpg|Asking for it
File:Kermit goatse.jpg|An unnamed victim comes forth and shows the anal devastation wrought by Clash
</gallery>}}


==Elmo back in the day==
==Elmo back in the day==

Revision as of 19:30, 28 November 2012

Elmo knows where you live!
E is for ephebophilia
Some argue that the whole controversy has been manufactured as part of an evil plot by Elmo's arch-nemesis, the greedy manchild, Huxley.

Elmo is I mean, was a furry red monster on Sesame Street. If you don't know what Sesame Street is fuck you, go back to the Taliban. The character was apparently created one day when the show's staff decided to be dicks and give the fag on the way out a hideous ball of red fur and zero instructions besides "Make something out of it". Nobody else wanted to be seen on or off stage with the ugly thing anyway.

Through sheer negro magic that fag transformed the puppet too ugly and uncomfortable for anyone else to play into "the embodiment of love" - Elmo. Of course, that's probably before your time. You probably know Elmo best as the advertising powerhouse that Sesame Street uses to make sure the money keeps on rolling in. That ugly little ball of fur has been in over 26 movies and has spawned countless ungodly merchandise made to seperate breeders from their Jew gold.

Let's just say that Elmo wasn't the only one wanting to be "tickled" by young boys.

The Creepy

In October 2012 some money-seeking faggot accused Elmo's handler Kevin Clash that he [Clash] fucked him in the ass when he was the tender age of 17. Of course the magic negro himself claims he thought the kid was 18. Since then dozens of butthurt and lonely attention whores have come out of the woodwork claiming they all have been tickled by the nigger Elmo.

Considering the Elmo Line, it's not too big a leap to make.

  • Elmo is the "Embodiment of Love". Love for young folks from a much older man
  • Tickle Me Elmo: encourages young boys to touch low on another man's body to "tickle" them
  • Elmo Children's Chairs: Sit your son between the smiling Elmo's legs
  • Fireman, Policeman, Indian, ect. Elmo: It's the all Elmo Village people! How did anyone miss it?

The "Victims"

Everyone knows Sesame Street is set in a ghetto, complete with some dude living in the trash can and yellow birds hallucinating about elephants. With this realistic approach to Sesame Street's setting came the hookers. Sexy 16 year olds wandering Sesame Street selling their wares was just too much for Elmo, and he succumbed to their wiles. Here is a rogue's gallery of sexy:

Elmo back in the day


Sesame Street also made this new line of Elmo toys, encouraging kids to become heroes

In Kevin Clash's defense, they did say they were 18 and were totally asking for it.

Elmo today

While Elmo's attitude towards young boys might be somewhat suspect, it is refreshing and reassuring to know, however, that when it comes to those wormy kikes, he's right on the money.

See Also

External Links


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