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Latvia: Difference between revisions

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[[File:Latvian flag.jpg|thumb|right|The [[Shit|infamous]] flag, [[Menstrual painting|painted with crimson menstrual blood]] of ancient latvian [[Prostitot|prostitots]].]]
[[File:Latvian food source.jpg|thumb|right|Fact: This is the only food source in Latvia]]
[[File:Latvian mickey mouse.jpg|thumb|right|Latvian Mickey Mouse, said to eat the souls of homosexual children]]
[[File:Latvian mickey mouse.jpg|thumb|right|Latvian Mickey Mouse, said to eat the souls of homosexual children]]
[[File:Latvian gay pride parade.jpg|thumb|right|Latvian Gay Pride Parade: Every Tuesday & Thursday]]
[[File:Latvian gay pride parade.jpg|thumb|right|Latvian Gay Pride Parade: Every Tuesday & Thursday]]
'''Latvians''', like most citizens of ex-[[Soviet Russia|Soviet]] satellite nations ([[Lithuania]], [[Kyrgyzstan]]) lack [[Money|economic attention]] from [[Jews|richer countries]] and make up for this fact by claiming to have invented fucking absolutely everything under the sun including [[television]], [[alcohol]], [[fire]], and [[AIDS]]. The truth of the matter however is that Latvians had no hand in inventing any of these things with the possible exception of AIDS. What they did do though was launch a [[ddos|distributed denial of service]] attack against [[Idlenet]]; thusly all botnets that are complete and utter failures are referred to as Latvian botnets.
'''Latvia''' is [[Shit|one of those countries]] you mention and everyone remembers [[Hetalia]], as depicted in the [[anime]] it's a [[Yaoi|little boy with no self-confidence]], which is what Latvia is today - A tiny shithole full of Nazi-wannabes who do nothing useful to
fulfill their dream of purging [[Russians|absolutely]] [[Jews|unnecessary]] [[Homosexual|people]] and causing [[Drama]] whenever it's possible.
As indoctrinated by their [[Aryan|founding fathers]], Latvians are born with hate towards anything that isn't [[Nazi|Latvian]] and [[Heterosexual]], making them the most racist, and the best troll-country in the world today, trolling russians and jews being their only purpose of existence.


== PotatoLand: A History Of ==
<center>
 
'''Come visit Latvia to see a holiday dedicated to Nazis'''
Since the beginning of time Latvia has been all about [[serious business]].  Once a great power, rulers of the Baltic region, they quickly lost their status as a bad ass European state due to their military being smaller than an [[My Tiny Dick|Asian man's penis]].  With an active duty roster of roughly 4,000 soldiers other nations in the area soon realized that [[rape|picking on]] the Latvians was pretty fucking easy.  Soon everyone on the continent was [[trolling|playing]] kick the potato and wiping their ass with the world's ugliest flag.
</center>
 
<center>
While things went badly for Latvia in the 1800's it wasn't until the 20th century that [[FUBAR|shit really hit the fan]] for them.  While the real super powers in the world were doing shit of relevance the Latvians were busy [[truth|cowering in Lithuania]] as the Russians raped their women and fucked their cattle.  At the close of the first world war Latvia breathed a collective [[Oh ok|sigh of relief]] believing that the worst was finally over and that they could go back to the status quo of talking shit about Estonia and contributing nothing to world culture.  They were, of course, completely wrong as usual.
<youtube>sVe27bMouUM</youtube>
 
</center>
Once [[hitler|Adolf]] began his campaign of [[holocaust|bathing every Jew in Germany]] things went from bad to worse.  Happy camps were set up in the capital of Riga to try and help clean the filthy potato farming vermin of their nation.  The results were [[fail|less then stellar]] and the Germans withdrew once they realized that the smell just wouldn't wash off.  The Russians on the other hand, after having lived in conditions which rivaled that of Oscar The Grouch, didn't seem to mind so much and absorbed the small nation into the greater USSR.
 
For decades Latvia was occupied by the [[In Soviet Russia...|Reds]] as they stole anything that wasn't nailed down until finally nothing was left to take.  In the early 90's the Latvians finally had enough and made a [[drama|dramatic]] stand in the heart of Riga to demand their freedom and independence.  It's just too bad no one called ahead to tell the Russians about it since none of them showed up.  Unbeknownst to the Latvians the USSR had already collapsed about three years prior and so their show of force [[lol|was for nothing]].  As usual, Latvia completely fucked it up.
 
== PotatoLand: Today ==
 
Nowadays Latvia mostly sits around and complains about how bad things are and how much better it used to be when they were [[buttsex|taking it up the ass]] from the Russians.  While their fathers and grandfathers had bleed and died to guarantee the children of Latvia their freedom it seems as if those children could really give a shit as they are more interested in speaking in Russian slang and dressing like Russian whores.  Their culture is divided into three major sections: [[retards|Latvians]], [[faggots|Latvians who wished they were Russians]], [[niggers|Estonians who took a wrong turn at the middle of nowhere]].  Truly a nation of greats.


While many nations typically have an industry or trade that they can claim as a strong point the Latvians have neither.  [[truth|Possessing no actually intelligence or abilities]] beyond using their hands to manually move dirt so they can reach their precious, life giving potatoes Latvian citizens usually do nothing all day long.  The only possible exception being the making of babies; [[homo|gay]] ass babies.  While it is commonly known that Latvia is an extemely homophobic country what isn't so well known is that that homophobia is really a cover for the massive faggotry that goes on behind the scenes.  
{{quote|I'm a [[Fag|European]] like you! And your ancestor killed my [[Jew|ancestor]]. |Jew [[Trying too hard]]}}


Economically speaking Latvia is poor; dirt fucking poor. Most jobs pay roughly 6 lats a day which is the equivalent of 7 cents US.  What this means is that most Latvians have to work extra jobs to pay the rent.  Those jobs include such tasks as sucking [[cocks|cocks]], wiping the asses of Russians tourists, strangling Estonian children for hardcore underground [[cp|child porn]] videos, and digging potato fields by the hundreds.  In general the country is a hellscape and foreigners are advised to stay [[gtfo|as far away as humanly possible]].
[[File:LatvianAirForceRoundelPre1940.png|thumb|right|[[MFW|Mfw]] Latvians used this as their [[9/11|air force]] symbol since 1918]]


== PotatoLand: The People ==
== History of The Latvian Empire ==
 
Latvia is comprised of four distinct population groupings: Russians, Russians, Russians, and Russians. While the country once had pure Latvian blood coursing through its veins the Reds showed up and fucked that straight out of them.  Now all that's left is a [[PlayStation 3|broken shell]] of a people who are so Russian they mind as well rename their children Lenin and Stalin and shove a hammer and sickle up their asses.  A typical Latvian can usually be found [[alcohol|drunkenly]] staggering down the street crying about how terrible his homeland is.


[[Over 9000]] years ago subhuman [[Niggers|Latvian tribes]] inhabited the green plains of the coast of the Baltic sea, spreading Latviaids across the land by having [[Incest|mass-incest]] orgies and [[Religion|obeying]] their cosmic pagan overlords [[Angela Merkel|Laima]] and [[Hitler|Pērkons]] and selling useless amber jewelry.
Savages being savages argued about [[Shit noone cares about|politics and agriculture]] all the time, so country was split into a few parts and it was easy for Germans to [[rape]] and conquer lesser states one by one and installing their [[christian]] [[faggotry]].
Germans taught Latvians homosexuality, which is the reason why Latvia was such a [[Pussy|pussy-ass]] [[Faggot|faggot]] country until 1918 when [[Lie|they finally got some balls]] and [[pwned]] some reds and germans, caused massive [[drama]] for nothing and became a [[Shit|prosperous]] [[USA|nation]] selling nothing but expired bacon and dairy products to filthy brits.
But it wasn't over for them, as the [[Retards|Latvian folk]] were about to embrace the [[Rainbow Stalin|rainbow]] once again. It wasn't that bad to say the least and when Hitler began his campaign of [[Holocaust|bathing every jew in europe]], it got even better and Latvia fell gay for Germany, which reds didn't like, and as already known, owned Germany and took [[Bullshit|back what they deserved]].
In the 90s, Latvia made more drama. This time together with Estoners and Lithuanians, but once again it was all useless [[drama]], as USSR was bound to [[fail|collapse]] anyway. Latvia gained independence along with [[atleast 100]] [[Shit nobody cares about|other obscure countries]] which to this day haven't done anything useful, with a possible exception of Latvia and Lithuania excelling at rates of becoming [[an hero]] and having an [[awesome]] [[Internets|internet]] connection.


== [[Britain's Got No Fucking Talent|Latvia's got no fucking talent]] ==
[[Last thursday]] a [[Retard|Latvian comedian]] [[Powerword|Gatis Kandis]] showed his [[Fail|excellent performance]] on Britain's Got Talent.


<center>
<center>
'''Typical Latvian'''
'''This guy [[LOLWUT|also raps]]'''
</center>
</center>
<center>
<center>
<youtube>wN8kWlH3G3E</youtube>
<youtube>NbUSjexRJm4</youtube>
</center>
</center>


== Latvian Empire today ==
Many Latvians are extremely hostile to races [[Niggers|inferior to their own]]. If [[There are no niggers on the internet|you're a nigger]] in Latvia, you [[Unrealistic expectations|might get lucky to get from point A to point B with only getting stared at]], where as if you're less lucky, you'll get [[raped|beaten]] or even killed by some gay-ass [[hipster]] teenagers or [[Russians]]. [[Homosexuality]] in Latvia is [[B&]] and Gay Parades are accompanied with different, sharp projectiles.
[[Typical]] Latvians are Subhumans who can be seen staggering drunk down the street, crying about how horrible their country is because of [[Russians]], [[Gays]] and [[Jews]]. Latvians also lack tolerance towards [[Tourism|tourists]], as they find them as [[retarded]], [[ALL CAPS|loud]] and [[Irony|obnoxious]]. What most Latvians don't realize, is that tourism is one of the small things that keeps their shitty [[economy]] afloat, together with (only ethnic Latvian [[seriously]]!) [[whores]] who are [[Pegging]] [[Fag]]gy male [[Swedish]] Sex Tourists or work as [[Prostitute]]s in Western and Northern Europe, plywood and dairy products.
Avoid this country at all costs.


== Things not found in Latvia ==
*[[Faggots]]
*[[Niggers|Black people]]
*[[Money]]
*[[Bronies]]
*[[Life]]


While most Latvians prefer to hate the gays they will on occasion take a moment out of their drunken stupors to [[obama|lynch a nigger]] in the street.  This of course is the only redeemable quality about the country as whole as most of Europe is scared shitless of the jungle tribes from the [[africa|dark continent]] just below them.  With their hatred of all things gay and black it's no wonder why Latvia and the United States are such great allies.  Beats being friends with the [[French]].


A common misconception about Latvia's people is that there are [[women]] among them.  This is an understandable mistake given how effeminate their males are.  Dressing mostly in skirts and high heels the men of Latvia apply large quantities of make up to their faces to help attract Russian suitors.  All in the hopes of having precious [[communist]] ass babies with their new Red sugar daddies.  This also helps to explain why sex tourism is so big over there as most Latvian teenagers are the [[gay|gayest]] little fucks you ever did see.
== How to troll Latvians ==


=== Latvian [[An hero|Superhero]] ===
*Inform them that their cultural developing level was equal to them of [[Nigger]]s before Germans conquered and colonized their country
Stand aside, [[Spiderman|Stan Lee]]. [[Retards|Latvian government]] created a living deity so [[Over 9000|epic]] it shits all over [[Comics|Marvel characters]]. About 5 years ago Latvians got [[Butthurt|upset]] about the [[Shit nobody cares about|pollution of forests]]. Shit was [[FUBAR]] so they had to come to some [[WIN|Drastic measures]]. [[HAHAHA OH WOW|They stuck a fat guy in a black jumpsuit and a pink pig mask and gave him superpowers for turning innocent people into pigs]]. His reign continued up until 2007 when [[Faggot|Valdis Zatlers]] took over the neighborhood. Cūkmens is currently running for [[USSR|greater Latvian empire]] as it's future [[Kim Jong Il|leader]].
*Tell them that they are actually Finno-Ugrians by refering the admixture with Livonians (an Finno-Ugrian ethnic group that lived in Latvia)
*Mention that the [[Soviet Union]] liberated Latvia from the German Occupation (Latvians will be extremly butthurt).
*Point out that Admiring of Latvian Nazi Collaborators is only the Expression of their [[True|Inferiority complex towards Russia]].
*Inform them that the real purpose of the American Military Bases in their country is to keep them under American Dominance and not to protect them from Russia
*Point out that their Protector USA is responsible for the Migrant Crisis


== Gallery ==
== Gallery ==
{{cg|Pictures Of PotatoLand|gall|center|<gallery>
 
{{cg|Pictures Of Latvian Empire|gall|center|<gallery>
<center><gallery>
<center><gallery>
Image:fat_ppl.jpg|Latvian citizens
Image:fat_ppl.jpg|The very uncommon - fat Latvian couple
Image:cukmen.jpg|Latvian idols
Image:cukmen.jpg|Latvian idols
Image:bush_zatler_hitler.jpg|Comrades
Image:bush_zatler_hitler.jpg|Comrades
Image:transport_problem.jpg|Our country has a problem...
Image:transport_problem.jpg|Our country has a problem...
Image:Transport problem riga trolleybus 2016.jpg|Nothing has changed 10 years later..
Image:Latvia-Riga-Russian-population.png|Latvians are helpless against Russian Empire people, they are taking back Riga since 1991.
</gallery>|<gallery>
</gallery>|<gallery>
Image:stealth_zacha.jpg|Apparently disabled persons do not have this problem.
Image:stealth_zacha.jpg|Apparently disabled persons do not have this problem.
Line 60: Line 74:
Image:Fat_years.jpg|[[The man]]
Image:Fat_years.jpg|[[The man]]
Image:Modern_transport.jpg|Typical woman driver in Latvia
Image:Modern_transport.jpg|Typical woman driver in Latvia
Image:Latvian Internets.jpg|Latvian Internets
Image:Latvian Internets.jpg|Shittiest Latvian Internet Provider. Ironically, Latvians have the 3rd fastest download speed.
</gallery>}}
</gallery>}}


Latest revision as of 09:41, 30 January 2019

Latvian Mickey Mouse, said to eat the souls of homosexual children
Latvian Gay Pride Parade: Every Tuesday & Thursday

Latvia is one of those countries you mention and everyone remembers Hetalia, as depicted in the anime it's a little boy with no self-confidence, which is what Latvia is today - A tiny shithole full of Nazi-wannabes who do nothing useful to fulfill their dream of purging absolutely unnecessary people and causing Drama whenever it's possible. As indoctrinated by their founding fathers, Latvians are born with hate towards anything that isn't Latvian and Heterosexual, making them the most racist, and the best troll-country in the world today, trolling russians and jews being their only purpose of existence.

Come visit Latvia to see a holiday dedicated to Nazis

   
“ 		 
I'm a European like you! And your ancestor killed my ancestor.
  		„
  		 

—Jew Trying too hard

Mfw Latvians used this as their air force symbol since 1918

History of The Latvian Empire

Over 9000 years ago subhuman Latvian tribes inhabited the green plains of the coast of the Baltic sea, spreading Latviaids across the land by having mass-incest orgies and obeying their cosmic pagan overlords Laima and Pērkons and selling useless amber jewelry. Savages being savages argued about politics and agriculture all the time, so country was split into a few parts and it was easy for Germans to rape and conquer lesser states one by one and installing their christian faggotry. Germans taught Latvians homosexuality, which is the reason why Latvia was such a pussy-ass faggot country until 1918 when they finally got some balls and pwned some reds and germans, caused massive drama for nothing and became a prosperous nation selling nothing but expired bacon and dairy products to filthy brits. But it wasn't over for them, as the Latvian folk were about to embrace the rainbow once again. It wasn't that bad to say the least and when Hitler began his campaign of bathing every jew in europe, it got even better and Latvia fell gay for Germany, which reds didn't like, and as already known, owned Germany and took back what they deserved. In the 90s, Latvia made more drama. This time together with Estoners and Lithuanians, but once again it was all useless drama, as USSR was bound to collapse anyway. Latvia gained independence along with atleast 100 other obscure countries which to this day haven't done anything useful, with a possible exception of Latvia and Lithuania excelling at rates of becoming an hero and having an awesome internet connection.

Latvia's got no fucking talent

Last thursday a Latvian comedian Gatis Kandis showed his excellent performance on Britain's Got Talent.

This guy also raps

Latvian Empire today

Many Latvians are extremely hostile to races inferior to their own. If you're a nigger in Latvia, you might get lucky to get from point A to point B with only getting stared at, where as if you're less lucky, you'll get beaten or even killed by some gay-ass hipster teenagers or Russians. Homosexuality in Latvia is B& and Gay Parades are accompanied with different, sharp projectiles. Typical Latvians are Subhumans who can be seen staggering drunk down the street, crying about how horrible their country is because of Russians, Gays and Jews. Latvians also lack tolerance towards tourists, as they find them as retarded, loud and obnoxious. What most Latvians don't realize, is that tourism is one of the small things that keeps their shitty economy afloat, together with (only ethnic Latvian seriously!) whores who are Pegging Faggy male Swedish Sex Tourists or work as Prostitutes in Western and Northern Europe, plywood and dairy products. Avoid this country at all costs.

Things not found in Latvia


How to troll Latvians

  • Inform them that their cultural developing level was equal to them of Niggers before Germans conquered and colonized their country
  • Tell them that they are actually Finno-Ugrians by refering the admixture with Livonians (an Finno-Ugrian ethnic group that lived in Latvia)
  • Mention that the Soviet Union liberated Latvia from the German Occupation (Latvians will be extremly butthurt).
  • Point out that Admiring of Latvian Nazi Collaborators is only the Expression of their Inferiority complex towards Russia.
  • Inform them that the real purpose of the American Military Bases in their country is to keep them under American Dominance and not to protect them from Russia
  • Point out that their Protector USA is responsible for the Migrant Crisis

Gallery

Pictures Of Latvian Empire About missing Pics
  • The very uncommon - fat Latvian couple
    The very uncommon - fat Latvian couple
  • Latvian idols
    Latvian idols
  • Comrades
    Comrades
  • Our country has a problem...
    Our country has a problem...
  • Nothing has changed 10 years later..
    Nothing has changed 10 years later..
  • Latvians are helpless against Russian Empire people, they are taking back Riga since 1991.
    Latvians are helpless against Russian Empire people, they are taking back Riga since 1991.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]
  • Apparently disabled persons do not have this problem.
    Apparently disabled persons do not have this problem.
  • Looks like police is disabled, too.
    Looks like police is disabled, too.
  • Latvia still uses woman powered ploughs.
    Latvia still uses woman powered ploughs.
  • The leader
    The leader
  • Political affairs
    Political affairs
  • The man
    The man
  • Typical woman driver in Latvia
    Typical woman driver in Latvia
  • Shittiest Latvian Internet Provider. Ironically, Latvians have the 3rd fastest download speed.
    Shittiest Latvian Internet Provider. Ironically, Latvians have the 3rd fastest download speed.

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Featured article September 30, 2005
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