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Invisible Crane: Difference between revisions

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[[image:GrantM.jpg|thumb|The beast itself.]]
[[image:GrantM.jpg|thumb|Symbol of Scottish [[Virgin|Pride]]]]
[[Image:L_4d9835850d6db7e7c64a8d2de1cba3f7.jpg|thumb|He's single, ladies!]]
{{quote|My name is Grant McLellan and I am from Glasgow, Scotland....but then again you might not care since I am not some big celebrity, model, wrestler, or anyone who works in the likes of the video games industry or the anime industry....|Grant| Myspace, 19/03/06}}


'''Invisible Crane''' (aka. '''GrantM''') is a 25 year-old [[assburger]] muncher who lives with his parents, is unemployed and desperate to meet a girl to finally lose his [[virgin|virginity]] to despite how the only two things he ever talks about are [[anime]] and [[video games]]. While so far this sounds like a description for [[you]], what makes him stand out is his determination to share all these issues with the world via the medium of YouTube. He also has plans of being a [[wrestling|pro-wrestler]], a voice actor, a game designer and the other get-famous dreams usually only dreamt by [[13-year old boys]] who are also desperate to lose their virginity. The flaws with these issues are:
'''Grant McLellan''' (better known as '''Invisible Crane''' or '''GrantM''') is a Scottish [[assburger]] muncher with a really whiny voice, who lives with his parents, is unemployed, on [[welfare]], desperate to meet a girl and finally lose his [[virgin|virginity]] and he shares all these issues with the world via <s>[[YouTube]]</s> Ustream. His list of interests consists of only [[anime]], [[Guitar Hero|video games]] and [[tranny|wearing blouses]].  


* for being from [[Scotland]], he speaks with a really whiny, high-pitched, faux-American accent.
While so far this sounds like a description for [[you]], what makes him stand out is his  plans for being a [[wrestling|pro-wrestler]] and a voice actor (or any other profession that would help him become [[famous]]), and his uncanny ability to cause drama wherever he goes. There is also the fact that (in case you didn't notice the image at the top of the fucking article) he showed his very own [[Dick|invisible crane]] on ustream due to [[alcohol]] and [[trolling|peer pressure]].
* he has an uncanny talent for causing [[drama]] of some kind wheresoe'er he goes.
* although a big guy, he's [[gay|super sensitive]] to any kind of pain.
* he is as [[stupid|thick as shit]] and could never learn the programming code needed to be a games designer.
* without exception, everyone who has come into contact with him in any way, shape or form thinks he's a [[cunt]].


The beast was first discovered on the Voice Acting Alliance forums in 2005 dreaming of being a voice-actor for some shitty [[anime]] company, followed by a long-stint of internet downtime as he instead joined in on the anime [[convention|conventions]] scene around the UK and making himself unforgettable, though not in the way he plans. All this changed when the day he decided, like so many before him, that he has found his ultimate calling in life; To sit in his bedroom and talk to his [[YouTube|webcam]]. Thus began his epic internet comeback, more lulzier and trollable than before.
== (Voice) Acting Career ==
{{Quote|[[300|I...AM...TALENTED!]]|Grant, [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|being modest]]}}
[[Image:GrantMfirststepontheyellowbrickroad.jpg|thumb|left|Grant's very own brick at the Scottish Youth Theatre]]
Grant was first spotted in the summer of 2005 on the [[Voice Acting Alliance]], which he joined after watching some "Behind the scenes" feature on the dubbing of some terrible anime and deciding that voice acting would be the greatest thing in the world. He made a thread advertising his talents (demo included) for any voice-over projects (especially for ADV or Funimation, [[truth|who obviously look around online amateur forums for people to hire]]). He also created an uproar over a young lady (younger than Grant) being a professional voice actor, claiming it was unfair. He didn't win a lot of friends.


== In The Beginning; Voice Acting ==
He also began popping up at many other forums as well, where he would whine about not being a voice actor. At most of these forums he would try and "get connections" so that he can "[[rape|break into]]" the field of professional voice-over work. He got banned from many of them as well. These include: The Toonzone forums, The Anime News Network forums, Anime-England, The Glasgow Anime forums, The [[Newgrounds]] forums and The Ayacon forums.
[[Image:L_4d9835850d6db7e7c64a8d2de1cba3f7.jpg|thumb|"I waaaaaannntttt boobies"]]
{{quote|My name is Grant McLellan and I am from Glasgow, Scotland....but then again you might not care since I am not some big celebrity, model, wrestler, or anyone who works in the likes of the video games industry or the anime industry....|GrantM, Myspace, 19/03/06}}


{{audio|Grantm_ding.mp3|The clip that launched a thousand loldongs}} (or, in this case, "dings")
In addition to his forum antics, he has also frequently updated his [[LiveJournal]], expressing his hopes that professional voice over artists and casting studios like ADV and Funimation will discover and hire him for lead roles in "[[shit|Fan Favourite]]" anime series.
 
The first noted appearances from GrantM have been dated to the summer of 2005 when he first made his debut in the [[Voice Acting Alliance]] forums, freshly finished watching the "Behind the scenes" feature on the dubbing of some god-forsaken anime and deciding that voice acting is the greatest job in the world. After making some horrible demo on the forum of himself advertising his talents to any voice-over projects going (especially those from ADV/Funimation going onto an amateur site for their next big star) he became a notorious serial forum go-er. What made him so notable is that he would sign up at many forums with only one purpose: to use people and whine about not being an anime voice actor. At these particular forums, he will ask the same questions, looking for different answers. He has always sought out "[[buttsex|professional connections]]" so that he may use them to try to "[[rape|break into]]" the field of professional voice-over work. In one specific forum, the Voice Acting Alliance, he created an uproar over a young lady making it into the field, claiming it was unfair. This, among many other irritations, granted him the title of "Fastest Ban" at the forum.
 
He had been banned several times from one specific forum: Anime on DVD, as well as a quick ban from the aforementioned Voice Acting Alliance. Other forums he plagued were the Toonzone forums, The Anime News Network forums, Anime-England, The Glasgow Anime forum, The Newgrounds forums, the Ayacon forums and the Anime England IRC where he popped up from time to time inducing many lulz.In addition to his forum antics, he has also been sighted at [[Livejournal]], where he hopes that professional voice over artists and the casting studios ADV and FUNimation will discover him and hire him for lead roles in "[[shit|Fan Favourite]]" Anime series.
 
The best of these years was captured on the epic [http://forums.catsonmars.com/index.php?showtopic=1335&st=0 Cats on Mars' GrantM thread]. Most of the links on it are broken but still good for the origin story.
 
== [[LiveJournal]] ==
Grant's LJ account is where the best of his whining drama played out. His original journal {{lj|user=GrantM1}} was where his inner whiny little whore truly came out of its shell, bitching about how he's still just a fat retard from Glasgow instead of being the screeching voice of [[Fullmetal Alchemist|Alphonse Elric]] as well as attempting to justify his IRL drama and complaining that people bullied him by constantly [[lulz|laughing]] at every stupid thing he does.
 
A highlight of Grant's LJ saga was when a mysterious unnamed voice-actor who worked for ADV and Funimation made an account called {{lj|user=gmvox}} and began posting about his career as a voice actor for ADV, claiming to best some of the more and female voice actors. It took anyone with half a brain 2 seconds (and [[gaiafags]] 10 seconds) to work out that this so-called "voice actor" was indeed GrantM in [[Sock puppet|disguise]]. After people saw through this like glass and began revealing this amazing secret on his LJ, Grant had a fit of insanity and [[delete fucking everything|deleted all entries]] in his 'gmvox' journal and ranted and raved about how he was afraid of never being a voice actor for ADV - his sole reason for creating the journal.
 
== IRL Trolling ==
<center>{{frame|{{morphquote|mqtest3|background-color:#ffffff; width: 700px; height: 210px;|font-weight: bold;
|WOMEN CAN MASTURBATE!!??|A very surprised GrantM|Eventually I sang it and it seemed everyone there enjoyed it, I was told later on that I got just about everyone dancing|An extremely delusional GrantM - Glasgow Anime, 24/07/07|My name on the Yellow Brick Road wall in the Scottish Youth Theatre|GrantM - Glasgow Anime, 14/01/08|Months ago me and some other GA people went to a Pokemon event in the hopes of getting a rare Pokemon you can't get in the games...we did not get it. But we did give our e-mail addresses to the people involved at that thing so that we could get our hands on it...I don't think I've got an e-mail back from them at all|GrantM - Glasgow Anime, 19/01/08|Well Edinburgh...it's kinda like Glasgow in a way...only it has a castle|GrantM - Glasgow Anime, 26/02/08|Women can't get STDs, they don't have genitals|GrantM, 08|[[300|I...AM...TALENTED!]]|GrantM, [[Unwarranted Self-Importance|professing to the world his many talents]]}}|color=#ffffff}}
</center>
 
[[image:Innocent girl.jpg|thumb|Innocent girl GrantM took advantage of while she was drunk]]
Upon joining the Glasgow Anime forum, he came to learn of their regular meet-ups and began to attend them. He would spout his [[unwarranted self importance|self-important crap]] to the group, drooling over every woman he saw and waiting for them to get moist for his big [[fat]] ass, constantly mistaking himself for being someone of actual interest as he looked down his nose at all the members, then quickly hiding behind his assburger shield whenever being pulled up for it. Thus began the [[IRL trolling]] of GrantM. Coming into contact with Grant initially just led to encouraging him to do odd acts, mostly involving Skype chats to his new fanbase. However, thinking he was now the social life of the group, he continued to act retarded beyond comprehension, creeping out men and women alike with his horny-assburger nonsense and [http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/820211.html?thread=93757939#t93757939 very weird self-admitions] until he eventually got banned from attending the anime club, a time that Grant considers the worst of his life ([http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/820211.html?thread=91216883 Click here] for the archived GA forum thread where the members voted to ban him). His LiveJournal and Myspace were flooded with his pleas for re-acceptance into the club; however, Grant was left out for over two years before there was forgiveness and he would begin to attend again.
 
[[Image:GrantMfirststepontheyellowbrickroad.jpg|thumb|GrantM's very own brick at the Scottish Youth Theatre]]
During his ban from the club, he attempted to actually get some of the [[cocksucking|actor skills]] everyone told him about when advising what he needs to not be a wannabe faggy voice actor, but instead be a professional faggy voice actor. He joined the Scottish Youth Theatre where he was told "OMG! You can't act, dance, sing or perform...WELCOME!". The highlight from his tour of duty with the SYT is when he performed in some minor role  during a show (sources say he was the all-important third tree from the right in act 2) and was given a brick for his talent, while the audience [[shit bricks|shat their own bricks]] after seeing his horrible acting.
 
One of the greatest recorded trollings of GrantM happened at a party in 2007, where Grant's [[lies|best friends]] invited him to join in on the merriment of the evening. What the actual plan was to get GrantM drunk and see how amusing it would be. The following video was captured:
 
<youtube>d3zKpua51PY</youtube>
 
 
The lulz didn't end here; only the video did. Grant continued onward to lick the floor, eat from bins and strip half-naked. Following this party Grant swore to [[Never drinking again|never drink again]]
 
 
 
'''Other "Social" Life clips'''
{{fv|GrantM '''trying''' to be social|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>4VvWHQoOUFs</youtube>
|<youtube>z67CTZY9HGk</youtube>
|<youtube>4N9-LbST-Tg</youtube>}}


To pass the time until an [[No|inevitable job offer from Funimation]], Grant decided to try something different - instead of being a faggy voice actor, he would be a faggy stage actor, so he joined the Scottish Youth Theatre where he was told "My god, you can't act, dance, sing or perform...WELCOME!". His highlight (only) performance was a small role in an unknown show (sources say he was given the IMPORTANT part of the third tree from the right in act 2), after which was given a brick for his talent. It's rumored that many audience members [[suicide|killed themselves]] after his "big scene".


== Conventions ==
== Conventions ==
It was upon meeting the Glasgow Anime Club that GrantM's convention track began.(Although he was rumoured to have been spotted at Ayacon '05. However, this was prior to his initial burst into the lulz limelight so not much attention was paid to him.) He attended Auchinawa (http://www.auchinawa.org.uk/), a Scottish anime convention in 2006, but sadly there was no reported nervous breakdown--just a lot of nervous walking around, asking gophers questions with blatantly obvious answers then getting unnecessarily defensive when given said answers, and looking over his shoulder a hell of a lot like he had something to hide. The only recorded lulz came from a video of him [[DDR|DDRing]]. He returned to Auchinawa in 2008, where his appreciation began even before the con did when he was asked by the committee to not use the username GrantM so people don't get put off of going when they saw this big tub of goo will be there. Instead GrantM used the username '''Invisible Crane'''. Thankfully, he lived up to his name and stayed invisible the whole con.
=== Glasgow Anime Meetings ===
{{Quote|Eventually I sang it and it seemed everyone there enjoyed it, I was told later on that I got just about everyone dancing|Grant| Glasgow Anime, 24/07/07}}
[[image:Innocent girl.jpg|thumb|An innocent girl that Grant took advantage of while she was drunk]]
Lurking The Glasgow Anime forum, Crane learned that they hold regular IRL meet-ups, which was a dream come true for him - to [[fuck|meet]] with [[Girls|people]] who share his [[Virgin|interests]]. Arriving there, he would spend most of his time [[unwarranted self importance|advertising his talents]], drooling over all the [[Trap|girls]] and pissing everyone off.  


In 2009 GrantM went to his second [[England|English]] convention, Kitacon (http://www.kitacon.org/), where he was a gopher. Other than [[moar]] DDRing to much lulz, not much was reported from Grant during the convention other than odd moments of his moronic logic, but all the best bits happened at the closing ceremony when Grant delivered two items of comedy brilliance, both captured and on YouTube:
Some people decided to [[troll|fuck around with him]] a little,  encouraging him to do odd acts, mostly during online chats, which would lead to the reveal of [http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/820211.html?thread=93757939#t93757939 some interesting facts]. At one point, they also got Grant drunk and recorded the results (see videos below). Even after the video ends, Grant supposedly continued onward to lick the floor, eat from bins and strip half-naked. Following the party, Grant swore to [[Never drinking again|never drink again]]


{{fv|Kitecon 2009|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
Eventually, though, most people got so sick of his shit that he [http://www.journalfen.net/community/fandom_wank/820211.html?thread=91216883#t91216883 was voted to be banned] from the forum and the club, which he considered to be the worst moment of his life (at the time). His LiveJournal and Myspace were flooded with pleas for re-acceptance, which he wouldn't receive until two years later.
|<youtube>gXK32XdlVQM</youtube>
|<youtube>euAKI-Np6xM</youtube>}}


=== Auchinawa / Kitacon ===
Grant later attended [http://www.auchinawa.org.uk/ Auchinawa], a Scottish anime convention, in 2006. Not much of interest happened. He just kind walked around nervously a lot, asking gophers retarded questions, getting unnecessarily defensive when given answers and looking over his shoulder '''a lot''' like he had something to hide. Though, he did play some [[DDR]] later on, which was recorded (see videos below). He returned to Auchinawa in 2008, where the committee was so anxious to have him back, that they told him to NOT register with his old GrantM username (so that his [[haters|fans]] don't cause a riot of [[hate|excitement]] at the knowledge that their idol would be attending). So, Grant decided to use  '''Invisible Crane''' instead. Thankfully, he lived up to his new name, by staying invisible the whole con.


[[Some say|Some people say]] that following these videos, interest for Auchinawa 2010 hit an all time low, but those people are wrong because [[shit nobody cares about|no one cared about]] Auchinawa to begin with.
In 2009 Grant attended, [http://www.kitacon.org/ Kitacon], where he was a gopher. Not much has been reported of Grant's activity there, except for another recording of him showing off his mad DDR skillz again. Then, at the closing ceremonies, little Grant got up on the stage in front of the hundreds of people and did a speech, which was also recorded. A BEHIND THE SCENES interview with him after the speech was also recorded (see videos below).


== Return to the internet: YouTube ==
<center>'''Convention Videos'''</center>
<center>{{fv|Kitecon 2009|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>d3zKpua51PY</youtube><center>Drunk at Glasgow Anime</center>
|<youtube>w3qBcrjuFEI</youtube><center>DDR at Auchinawa</center>
|<youtube>rbL_ZsusWDw</youtube><center>Kitacon '09 DDR</center>
|<youtube>gXK32XdlVQM</youtube><center>Kitacon '09 Speech</center>
|<youtube>euAKI-Np6xM</youtube><center>Kitacon '09 Interview</center>}}</center>


In 2008, Grant (under the username '''GrantM1''') posted around six videos on [[YouTube]] where he [[shit_nobody_cares_about|bared his soul]] to the [[internet]], realized the [[internet]] never cared, and subsequently deleted said videos.  Stand out videos included his aspirations to become a voice actor for the [[Simpsons]], the reasons that everyone should watch the new [[Star Trek]], and a scathing critique of [[Chris Crocker]]'s rise to fame.  Notably, the content was wholeheartedly lulzworthy, particularly when he bounced from happy-go-lucky to manic depressive without his voice changing key.


The following year he made another lot of videos under the username '''InvisibleCrane''', once again sharing with us the rants of the worst thing to come out of the UK since [[Susan Boyle]]. Most of it is just ranting about other YouTube drama and his own opinions of games and anime, obviously trying to have some sort of new career as a game critic despite his lack of having a credible opinion. After all: would you play games recommended to you by a retard?
== YouTube ==
[[File:Invisiblecrane_youtube_everyfuckingvideo.png|thumb|left|A screencap from EVERY SINGLE ONE of his YouTube videos]]
In 2008, Grant popped up on [[YouTube]], under the username [http://www.youtube.com/user/GrantM1 GrantM1]. He posted around six videos on [[YouTube]] where he [[shit_nobody_cares_about|bared his soul]] to the [[internet]]. Later, though, he realized that the internet doesn't give a shit, so he deleted them. Some of these videos included his aspirations to become a voice actor for the [[Simpsons]], and a retrospective on the career of [[Chris Crocker]]. A notable characteristic of these videos was his emotional shits from happy-go-lucky to manic depressive. The account is now hacked.


He did however find something his retarded powers did give him authority on; watching other retards. Therefore he spends a number of videos giving shoutouts to other YouTubers, either by tributing (AKA: ripping off) other video ideas in his own vids or by blatently dropping to two knees and sucking for all that is good and holy from the cocks of other users who are more popular and about as useless as him.
The following year he created a new account under the name '''InvisibleCrane''', where he made CURRENT and TOPICAL rants on terrible things like [[Susan Boyle]], or he would make reviews of his favorite (only) subjects - video games and anime, which [[noone]] watched. Though most of the time he he would spend involving himself in other YouTuber's drama, and giving shoutouts to other people, either by ripping off their video ideas, or by blatantly dropping to his knees and sucking the cocks of other, more popular, users, for all that is good and holy in the world.


His current YouTube aspiration is to get 10,000 views of one of his videos, something we should all help him with by watching and voting down anything he does.
He closed his account in 2011. [[Goodnight Sweet Prince|R.I.P. IN PEACE]]!!
{{Clear}}
<center>'''Examples of [[QUALITY]]'''</center>
<center>{{fv|YouTubevids|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>xtFv83WVzDM</youtube><center>Game Review</center>
|<youtube>kWSTn9fMvQ4</youtube><center>Personal Update</center>
|<youtube>DawaDrCM71M</youtube><center>R.I.P. [[Guitar Hero|Greatest Franchise Ever]]</center>}}</center>


== [[Moar]] Videos ==
== Alcoholism and Live Nudity ==
[[File:Invisiblecrane_facebook_cartondrinker.jpg|thumb|Grant drinks hardcore, LIKE A BOSS]]
Slowly coming the understanding that [[Noone]] likes him, he has no job and will die alone, Grant slowly began turning to his one true friend - the <s>bottle</s> carton. Slowly his problems drifted away as he took sip-by-sip. But drinking every day, though making him feel better, was lonely for Grant. So he got the idea to share his experience with the WORLD.


'''Lulzy stuff Grant did'''
So now, drunken Grant being on Ustream, for all to see, was a frequent event. His viewership at all times consisted of his loyal [[trolls|fanbase]], who kept encouraging Grant and making him feel better by having him do all kinds of funny things, such as deepthroating his microphone. However, some of the viewers began questioning Grant's [[dick|manliness and his manhood]], eventually arriving at a point where the poor intoxicated Grant had HAD ENOUGH, so he decided to STICK IT TO THE WORLD, by standing up in front of the camera and PULLING DOWN HIS PANTS, showing off his little invisible crane to the world (see image at top of article). The image was soon spread across every single social network he was a part of, and sent to every single one of his family members. Following this event, Grant swore to [[Never drinking again|never drink again]], until the next stream he did, where he cried about the image, and how the [[Internet hate machine|internet is going to hate him FOREVER]].  On a recent podcast by the [[Sons of Kojima|Sons of Kojima]] they hosted the notorious Nazi sympathizer Mister Metokur (a.k.a the Jim81Jim), during [https://youtu.be/FcnaTq-E55g?t=1h30m52s such podcast] Metokur claimed responsibility for this and many other [[Lulz|lulz]].
{{fv|LULZ1|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
{{Clear}}
|<youtube>sXrPYnq1vis</youtube><center>Triumph of Invisible Crane</center>
<center>'''Ustream Recordings'''</center>
|<youtube>ebEWZphLUDI</youtube><center>Dirty Talk with Invisible Crane</center>
<center>{{fv|ustream|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>rEnawqKGzAg</youtube><center>Dirty Talk with Invisible Crane part 2</center>
|<youtube>2HBAo72eJJA</youtube><center>Techno-blowjob</center>
|<youtube>w3qBcrjuFEI</youtube><center>DDR lulz part 1</center>
|<youtube>-S9AUfWGttQ</youtube><center>Post-Nudes Depression</center>}}</center>
|<youtube>rbL_ZsusWDw</youtube><center>...and part 2</center>}}


== Sick of his shit? ==
[[File:Invisiblecrane_chillinlikeahomie.jpg|thumb|left|Grant, enjoying his healthy lifestyle, thanks to the hard working tax-payers of Scotland]]
{{Quote|No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!|Grant, in response to someone threatening to report him to the Department for Work and Pensions Benefit Fraud, which is what YOU should do now.}}
If you've had enough of Grant's shit, and don't want him to be able to spend his goddamn [[welfare]] on stupid video game shit (he has bought over 250 video games and DVD movies with his Welfare), then DO YOUR PART and report him to the Department for Work and Pensions Benefit Fraud, by clicking on the link below.


This is FOR HIS OWN GOOD so that his ass would have more motivation to go out and get a fucking job.


'''Lulzy stuff Grant didn't do'''
[http://campaigns.dwp.gov.uk/campaigns/benefit-thieves/ Click here AND REPORT.]
{{fv|LULZ2|background-color: grey;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>mDpIw-3cSaA</youtube><center>The true A-Team</center>
|<youtube>6cprw_clY5o</youtube><center>An Epic Radio Drama</center>
|<youtube>MpiH5y8m_xw</youtube><center>The Fresh Crane of Welfare</center>
|<youtube>xu1Bbj0KcTg</youtube><center>Special CV building advice for Grant</center>}}


==Audio Clips==


Some lulzy clips captured from discussions with the beast.
== Mr. Popular & His Fans ==
Over the years Mr. McLellan has built up quite the [[stalker|following]] with his unique brand of videos and [[shit|voice over work]].  So it was only a matter of time until his [[trolls|loyal fanbase]] created some works of their own to honor this great autistic God.  What follows below are some classic examples of Crane worship that can be found around the interwebs.  The [[satan|grand invisible one]] is most pleased with these signs of true devotion. '''All hail King Spoony!'''


{{audio|Grantm ranch.MP3|What Grant will do to you}}


{{audio|Dont_say_that.MP3|Don't say that!}}
<center><youtube>MpiH5y8m_xw</youtube>      <youtube>sXrPYnq1vis</youtube></center>


{{audio|Grantm_asskicked.mp3|GrantM, the pussy of pussies}}


{{audio|Grantm_desperate.mp3|His chat-up line}}
== Words of Wisdom ==
<center>{{frame|{{morphquote|mqtest3|background-color:#lightblue; width: 700px; height: 210px;|font-weight: bold;
|Women can't get STDs, they don't have genitals|Grant, 2008
|WOMEN CAN MASTURBATE!!??|Grant
|Well Edinburgh...it's kinda like Glasgow in a way...only it has a castle|Grant, Glasgow Anime, 26/02/08
|What the hell is a scrotum?|Grant
|I think even the biggest blender would be too small for a midget...|Grant
}}|border=lightblue|background=lightblue}}
</center>


{{audio|Grant_realvoice.mp3|GrantM reveals his real voice}}


{{audio|Grant_scarymovie.mp3|Too brave to be scared of scary movies}}
<center>'''Listen for yourself'''</center>
<center><youtube>_mKdi1h3HYs</youtube></center>


{{audio|Grant_humour.mp3|Wierd...we find him hilarious}}
A zipfile, consisting of 79 of these audioclips can be downloaded [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=QOMLIAN9 here].


{{audio|Grantm_scrotum.mp3|Scrotum anyone?}}
== Gallery ==
<center>
<gallery>
File:Invisible Crane Bed and Blouse.png|Grant wears his Blouse LIKE A BOSS
File:Invisible Crane Chains Shirt.png|Grant attended a convention, cosplaying as ''Mr. Slave'' from [[South Park]]
File:Invisible Crane Facebook Profile Pic.png|This is the kind of look that serial killers have in their eyes
File:Invisible Crane Working Out.png|Building up his pecs with his 0.5 pound weights
File:Invisiblecrane_booze.jpg|[[Alcoholism]] is a serious disease...
File:Invisiblecrane thealcoholic.jpg|...which Grant suffers from
File:Invisiblecrane_yeeeeeaaaaaah.jpg|[[CSI|Yeeeeaaaah!]]
File:Crane Rawtops post.png|[http://www.breedingzone.com/threads/6697-Scotland Searching for love]
File:Invisible_Crane_Resume.png|Resume sent around scotland
File:StandingCarrot.jpg| Grant's Ding Dong


{{audio|grant_midgit.mp3|Killing midgits, GrantM's favourite hobby}}
</gallery>
 
</center>
{{audio|Grantrage.mp3|Grant calling women retarded}}
 
{{audio|Crane_nononononono.mp3‎|Crying for dear life as we threaten to call his parents.}}
‎
 
 
Want to hear moar clips like this? A zipfile containing 79 clips captured in Skype chats with him can be found [http://www.megaupload.com/?d=QOMLIAN9 here].
 
== For Moar Lulz ==
 
If you've had enough of Crane's shit and do not wish to hear him whine anymore for the greater justice you should file a report to the following link and complain how he's abusing govermental money on shit like Anime and 250 Video Games (including Halo: Reach, Kane and Lynch 2: Dog Days and more than likely the forthcoming Rock Band 3)
 
[http://campaigns.dwp.gov.uk/campaigns/benefit-thieves/ Department for Work and Pensions Benefit Fraud]


Sorry about that link
== DOX ==
*FULL NAME: Grant McLellan
*LOCATION: Glasgow, United Kingdom
*DATE OF BIRTH: December 24, 1984
*SKYPE: grantm10
*AIM: grantmclellan1
*XBOX LIVE: Invisible Crane


== External Links ==
== External Links ==
*<del>[http://360voice.gamerdna.com/tag/Invisible%20Crane His Xbox's blog]</del> - Inactive
*{{Facebook|InvisibleCrane|His facebook page}}
*[http://www.facebook.com/InvisibleCrane His facebook page]
*<del>{{yt|cu|InvisibleCrane|His YouTube account}}</del> DEACTIVATED
*[http://www.formspring.me/InvisibleCrane His Formspring.me page - questions are lulz but answers are pretty boring]
*{{Kfuser|invisible-crane.866|His Kiwi Farms account}}
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/InvisibleCrane His YouTube account]
**{{Kfthread|invisible-crane-grant-mcclellan.9960|''Invisible Crane / Grant McClellan}}
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/InvisibleCraneNeo YouTube Archive Account]
*[http://360voice.gamerdna.com/tag/Invisible%20Crane His Xbox LIVE blog]
*[http://www.formspring.me/InvisibleCrane His Formspring.me page - His Formspring.me]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/Grantics2 Mirror of his YouTube account (He deletes everything)]
*[http://www.youtube.com/user/Grantics2 Mirror of his YouTube account (He deletes everything)]
*[http://forums.catsonmars.com/index.php?showtopic=1335&st=0 Cats on Mars' GrantM Thread (5 years on and still full of lulz)]
*[http://grantm1.ytmnd.com/ YTMND #1]
*[http://grantm1.ytmnd.com/ YTMND #1]
*[http://grantm.ytmnd.com/ YTMND #2]
*[http://grantm.ytmnd.com/ YTMND #2]
*{{myspace|grantmclellan|GrantM}} - PUBLIC (but not been used for a while)
*[http://meatandpotatoes.ytmnd.com/ YTMND #3]
*{{myspace|grantmclellan|GrantM}} - (but not been used for a while)
* {{lj|user=GrantM1}} - Now friends only
* {{lj|user=GrantM1}} - Now friends only
* {{lj|user=InvisibleCrane}} - His new LJ updated with facist comments about Jews
* {{lj|user=InvisibleCrane}} - [[troll|His new]] LJ updated with facist comments about Jews
*grantmclellan1 - AIM
*XBox Live Gamertag - Invisible Crane
*Playstation Network Account: GrantM/Invisible Crane (Not confirmed on spelling)


{{aspies}}
{{aspies}}

Latest revision as of 14:22, 21 January 2023

TheMysteriousMrEnter Spergfest Bandwagon

The Man Himself

Enterbots: Meta527II ♦ Matrooko11 ♦ PhantomStrider8 ♦ Tommypezmaster ♦ Antony Aguilar ♦ 03bgood ♦ DLAbaoaqu ♦ AnimatedJames ♦ Matthew Davis ♦ TheMissingMystery ♦ Vailskibum94 ♦ NostalgiaJazzAdmirer ♦ The Rise and Fall of Nickelodeon ♦ wwwarea ♦ ToonEGuy ♦ ToonKriticY2K

Enter Haters and/or Former Fans: Professor Kuhtoons ♦ Quinton Reviews ♦ ThatKidDouglas ♦ Clay Claymore ♦ The Kiwi Kidz Klub ♦ NZDROW ♦ CartoonFreak666 ♦ SaturnDOS ♦ EmpLemon ♦ Invisible Crane ♦ cartoonlover98 ♦ SonofOdin29 ♦ GurigorloX ♦ Sir Wulfington ♦ Pie Pivotmontier-O ♦ Joe Crusher Pickles ♦ Emer Prevost ♦ Turkey Tom ♦ RebelTaxi ♦ StarGiantProductions


This person has Assburgers Syndrome,
so you can't say anything bad! :-(

Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.
Symbol of Scottish Pride
He's single, ladies!
   
“ 		 
My name is Grant McLellan and I am from Glasgow, Scotland....but then again you might not care since I am not some big celebrity, model, wrestler, or anyone who works in the likes of the video games industry or the anime industry....
  		„
  		 

—Grant, Myspace, 19/03/06

Grant McLellan (better known as Invisible Crane or GrantM) is a Scottish assburger muncher with a really whiny voice, who lives with his parents, is unemployed, on welfare, desperate to meet a girl and finally lose his virginity and he shares all these issues with the world via YouTube Ustream. His list of interests consists of only anime, video games and wearing blouses.

While so far this sounds like a description for you, what makes him stand out is his plans for being a pro-wrestler and a voice actor (or any other profession that would help him become famous), and his uncanny ability to cause drama wherever he goes. There is also the fact that (in case you didn't notice the image at the top of the fucking article) he showed his very own invisible crane on ustream due to alcohol and peer pressure.

(Voice) Acting Career

   
“ 		 
I...AM...TALENTED!
  		„
  		 

—Grant, being modest

Grant's very own brick at the Scottish Youth Theatre

Grant was first spotted in the summer of 2005 on the Voice Acting Alliance, which he joined after watching some "Behind the scenes" feature on the dubbing of some terrible anime and deciding that voice acting would be the greatest thing in the world. He made a thread advertising his talents (demo included) for any voice-over projects (especially for ADV or Funimation, who obviously look around online amateur forums for people to hire). He also created an uproar over a young lady (younger than Grant) being a professional voice actor, claiming it was unfair. He didn't win a lot of friends.

He also began popping up at many other forums as well, where he would whine about not being a voice actor. At most of these forums he would try and "get connections" so that he can "break into" the field of professional voice-over work. He got banned from many of them as well. These include: The Toonzone forums, The Anime News Network forums, Anime-England, The Glasgow Anime forums, The Newgrounds forums and The Ayacon forums.

In addition to his forum antics, he has also frequently updated his LiveJournal, expressing his hopes that professional voice over artists and casting studios like ADV and Funimation will discover and hire him for lead roles in "Fan Favourite" anime series.

To pass the time until an inevitable job offer from Funimation, Grant decided to try something different - instead of being a faggy voice actor, he would be a faggy stage actor, so he joined the Scottish Youth Theatre where he was told "My god, you can't act, dance, sing or perform...WELCOME!". His highlight (only) performance was a small role in an unknown show (sources say he was given the IMPORTANT part of the third tree from the right in act 2), after which was given a brick for his talent. It's rumored that many audience members killed themselves after his "big scene".

Conventions

Glasgow Anime Meetings

   
“ 		 
Eventually I sang it and it seemed everyone there enjoyed it, I was told later on that I got just about everyone dancing
  		„
  		 

—Grant, Glasgow Anime, 24/07/07

An innocent girl that Grant took advantage of while she was drunk

Lurking The Glasgow Anime forum, Crane learned that they hold regular IRL meet-ups, which was a dream come true for him - to meet with people who share his interests. Arriving there, he would spend most of his time advertising his talents, drooling over all the girls and pissing everyone off.

Some people decided to fuck around with him a little, encouraging him to do odd acts, mostly during online chats, which would lead to the reveal of some interesting facts. At one point, they also got Grant drunk and recorded the results (see videos below). Even after the video ends, Grant supposedly continued onward to lick the floor, eat from bins and strip half-naked. Following the party, Grant swore to never drink again

Eventually, though, most people got so sick of his shit that he was voted to be banned from the forum and the club, which he considered to be the worst moment of his life (at the time). His LiveJournal and Myspace were flooded with pleas for re-acceptance, which he wouldn't receive until two years later.

Auchinawa / Kitacon

Grant later attended Auchinawa, a Scottish anime convention, in 2006. Not much of interest happened. He just kind walked around nervously a lot, asking gophers retarded questions, getting unnecessarily defensive when given answers and looking over his shoulder a lot like he had something to hide. Though, he did play some DDR later on, which was recorded (see videos below). He returned to Auchinawa in 2008, where the committee was so anxious to have him back, that they told him to NOT register with his old GrantM username (so that his fans don't cause a riot of excitement at the knowledge that their idol would be attending). So, Grant decided to use Invisible Crane instead. Thankfully, he lived up to his new name, by staying invisible the whole con.

In 2009 Grant attended, Kitacon, where he was a gopher. Not much has been reported of Grant's activity there, except for another recording of him showing off his mad DDR skillz again. Then, at the closing ceremonies, little Grant got up on the stage in front of the hundreds of people and did a speech, which was also recorded. A BEHIND THE SCENES interview with him after the speech was also recorded (see videos below).

Convention Videos

Drunk at Glasgow Anime

DDR at Auchinawa

Kitacon '09 DDR

Kitacon '09 Speech

Kitacon '09 Interview

Previous Video | Next Video


YouTube

A screencap from EVERY SINGLE ONE of his YouTube videos

In 2008, Grant popped up on YouTube, under the username GrantM1. He posted around six videos on YouTube where he bared his soul to the internet. Later, though, he realized that the internet doesn't give a shit, so he deleted them. Some of these videos included his aspirations to become a voice actor for the Simpsons, and a retrospective on the career of Chris Crocker. A notable characteristic of these videos was his emotional shits from happy-go-lucky to manic depressive. The account is now hacked.

The following year he created a new account under the name InvisibleCrane, where he made CURRENT and TOPICAL rants on terrible things like Susan Boyle, or he would make reviews of his favorite (only) subjects - video games and anime, which noone watched. Though most of the time he he would spend involving himself in other YouTuber's drama, and giving shoutouts to other people, either by ripping off their video ideas, or by blatantly dropping to his knees and sucking the cocks of other, more popular, users, for all that is good and holy in the world.

He closed his account in 2011. R.I.P. IN PEACE!!

Examples of QUALITY

Game Review

Personal Update

R.I.P. Greatest Franchise Ever

Previous Video | Next Video

Alcoholism and Live Nudity

Grant drinks hardcore, LIKE A BOSS

Slowly coming the understanding that Noone likes him, he has no job and will die alone, Grant slowly began turning to his one true friend - the bottle carton. Slowly his problems drifted away as he took sip-by-sip. But drinking every day, though making him feel better, was lonely for Grant. So he got the idea to share his experience with the WORLD.

So now, drunken Grant being on Ustream, for all to see, was a frequent event. His viewership at all times consisted of his loyal fanbase, who kept encouraging Grant and making him feel better by having him do all kinds of funny things, such as deepthroating his microphone. However, some of the viewers began questioning Grant's manliness and his manhood, eventually arriving at a point where the poor intoxicated Grant had HAD ENOUGH, so he decided to STICK IT TO THE WORLD, by standing up in front of the camera and PULLING DOWN HIS PANTS, showing off his little invisible crane to the world (see image at top of article). The image was soon spread across every single social network he was a part of, and sent to every single one of his family members. Following this event, Grant swore to never drink again, until the next stream he did, where he cried about the image, and how the internet is going to hate him FOREVER. On a recent podcast by the Sons of Kojima they hosted the notorious Nazi sympathizer Mister Metokur (a.k.a the Jim81Jim), during such podcast Metokur claimed responsibility for this and many other lulz.

Ustream Recordings

Techno-blowjob

Post-Nudes Depression

Previous Video | Next Video

Sick of his shit?

Grant, enjoying his healthy lifestyle, thanks to the hard working tax-payers of Scotland
   
“ 		 
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!
  		„
  		 

—Grant, in response to someone threatening to report him to the Department for Work and Pensions Benefit Fraud, which is what YOU should do now.

If you've had enough of Grant's shit, and don't want him to be able to spend his goddamn welfare on stupid video game shit (he has bought over 250 video games and DVD movies with his Welfare), then DO YOUR PART and report him to the Department for Work and Pensions Benefit Fraud, by clicking on the link below.

This is FOR HIS OWN GOOD so that his ass would have more motivation to go out and get a fucking job.

Click here AND REPORT.


Mr. Popular & His Fans

Over the years Mr. McLellan has built up quite the following with his unique brand of videos and voice over work. So it was only a matter of time until his loyal fanbase created some works of their own to honor this great autistic God. What follows below are some classic examples of Crane worship that can be found around the interwebs. The grand invisible one is most pleased with these signs of true devotion. All hail King Spoony!



Words of Wisdom

   
“ 		 
Women can't get STDs, they don't have genitals
  		„
  		 

—Grant, 2008

   
“ 		 
WOMEN CAN MASTURBATE!!??
  		„
  		 

—Grant

   
“ 		 
Well Edinburgh...it's kinda like Glasgow in a way...only it has a castle
  		„
  		 

—Grant, Glasgow Anime, 26/02/08

   
“ 		 
What the hell is a scrotum?
  		„
  		 

—Grant

   
“ 		 
I think even the biggest blender would be too small for a midget...
  		„
  		 

—Grant

Previous Quote | Next Quote


Listen for yourself

A zipfile, consisting of 79 of these audioclips can be downloaded here.

Gallery

  • Grant wears his Blouse LIKE A BOSS
    Grant wears his Blouse LIKE A BOSS
  • Grant attended a convention, cosplaying as Mr. Slave from South Park
    Grant attended a convention, cosplaying as Mr. Slave from South Park
  • This is the kind of look that serial killers have in their eyes
    This is the kind of look that serial killers have in their eyes
  • Building up his pecs with his 0.5 pound weights
    Building up his pecs with his 0.5 pound weights
  • Alcoholism is a serious disease...
    Alcoholism is a serious disease...
  • ...which Grant suffers from
    ...which Grant suffers from
  • Yeeeeaaaah!
    Yeeeeaaaah!
  • Searching for love
    Searching for love
  • Resume sent around scotland
    Resume sent around scotland
  • Grant's Ding Dong
    Grant's Ding Dong

DOX

  • FULL NAME: Grant McLellan
  • LOCATION: Glasgow, United Kingdom
  • DATE OF BIRTH: December 24, 1984
  • E-MAIL: [email protected]
  • SKYPE: grantm10
  • MSN: [email protected]
  • AIM: grantmclellan1
  • XBOX LIVE: Invisible Crane

External Links


Invisible Crane is part of a series on Aspies. [Back to your happy placeSperg out]

Academy Maniacs • Adam Lanza • Albert Einstein • Alexander Slavros • Amber Buttrum • Andy Kaufman • Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto • Aspies for Freedom • Aspierations • Assburger • Baldi's Basics • Bambifan101 • Barron Trump • Bart-Toons • Beefrave • Benny_the_Snake • Benthelooney • Ben Shapiro • Bill9929 • Bill Gates • Blocklanders • BlueCatRiolu • BodyXPolitic • BonziWORLD • Boris Malagurski • Bourg Productions • Bram Cohen • Brandon Smith • Brownsquirrel • Cameron W. Cowan • Cansin13 • Chibiyima • Chris-chan • Chris Harper-Mercer • Clay Claymore • Cyndilovespiccolo • Dan Cilley • Darr • Darius McCollum • Darviela Maravarona • David Clegg • DaxFlame • Dellor • dev-catscratch • Diogo Mendes • DisneyFan01 • DLAbaoaqu • DodgerofZion • Dragonfan • drp1zza • Eddie Wise • EdenHeroineGirl • Elliot Rodger • EmpLemon • Erik Ribsskog • Erin Anthony • Evan Gragg • Flaglerchat • Flardox • Fucklewithshuckle • FUNImation2002 • Gachatards • GalaxyRailways2199 • Gary McKinnon • Geoshea • Glitchedblood • GoFags • GrantM • Graykat • Greg Mazujian • Greenyfags • Hannah Capps • Heed My Warning • Hozupindahows00s • Inmendham • Inuboy1000 • Ironholds • Jack Gilbert Graham • Jared Milton • Jahi/4444 • Javi Suzumiya • JINXDROWNED • Joeker • John Patrick Rogers • Joseph8276 • JustinandDennis • JustinRPG • Joey The Autist • Keegan Salisbury • Kawaii Kitsune • KawaiiKittee88 • Kelseyalicia • Kevin Havens • KingMasterReview • Kirbyslover • Kloeri • Kongzillarex619 • Kothorix • Kphoria • Lane Davis • LeafyIsHere • Logo Kids • Lordelthibar • Lougara • Lukas Pietsch • Lyndsay Kirkham • Lynn Ann • M. Chaos • Manlytears • Mar9122 • Marcus Potter • MarioMan7890 • MarioMario456 • Mark Zuckerberg • MascotGuy • Matthew Davis • Matthew Nicholson • MDetector5 • Michael Gimson • Minefags • Misha Silenosti • Missy • Mix Hyena • Monica Punk • Mumkey Jones • Mutescream • MylarBalloonFan • Nate Spidgewood • Nemo Hana • Neuro • Nichole337 • Nick Bravo • Nicky Reilly • Nikolas Cruz • Objectcucks • Olinkalex • Onigojirakaiju • Onyx Forepaw • Pacificoceanasia • PhantomStrider • Phonefags • PMDrive1061 • Popcorn • Prince Jeremy • Randy Stair • RavenNG • Robert Clark Young • ROtards • Rootbrian • Ross Lumbus • Ryan • SammyClassicSonicFan • SaturnDOS • Sebastien Levesque • Seunghwan Lee • Selery • Shane Lee • SiriusOrionis • SolidMario • SONYFANBOY • Spergin • Starblade • Starkiller88 • SteAndKel • SuperMarioLogan • Super Minecraft Kid • Tablecow • TGcomix • TheAmazingAtheist • TheDOSFag • The Eclectic Espeon • The rEactor • Theme Park Review • TheMysteriousMrEnter • Therealagerbon • The Juggernaut • The Unknown Autobot • TheVeganStudent • Timbox • Toby J Rathjen • ToKeN • Tom Serson • ToonEGuy • Tosh • Trigglypuff • TylerthDragon • Ulillillia • Vailskibum94 • Varg Vikernes • Waymuu • WeatherManKevin • WeDoALittleTrolling • Weegeeisgoingtokillm • Werechu • Wetflame • willg8686 • William "AlGore" Atchison • William Freund • Wim Crusio • WolfAdvocate • Wolfeedarkfang • wwwarea • You • ZS3

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