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Literally

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Literally is literally a filler word that is literally very popular amongst 16 year old girls and bloggers, literally, the word was originally supposed to mean that a sentence is not figurative, for example, if you say "oh shit dude, my mom will literally kill me for this" you mean that your mom will actually end your life.

However, since recorded history first began, the word has literally been degraded until it is now also just another form of "very", "extremely", "highly" and the like, and you can literally insert it everywhere to make whatever bullshit you spew sound more empathized. (Nb, unless you are literally retarded, you mean "emphasised" not "empathised".) Or you can use it to claim that what you are saying is literally true.

If someone tries to make out that you mean one version of literally, you can choose the other. Or not, depending on the situation. Either way, you literally win.

LIKE, LITERALLY!

If you literally think that a regular "literally" just doesn't catch the importance of your post, you can also literally add bold, Font size=5 and CAPS LOCK for a more severe effect, literally everyone in the shitty forum you circlejerk on will literally want to have sex with you and you will literally be the most popular user, and your e-penis will literally be the biggest in the universe.

Literally?

If you literally got your ass handed to you in an internet discussion you can quickly regain your honor by ceasing all further communication with whomever just literally raped you and tell them:

LITERALLY?

This literally always works if the troll in question is politically incorrect, an MRA or a nazi, everyone around you will literally be dumbfolded (sic) by your awesome display of wits and superior intellect, being on the receiving end of one of these will put them in such a shameful state they will literally have to leave the internet forever, and he will probably get permabanned too for literally being a sick fuck

Pronunciation

'Literally' is pronounced Lid-er-all-ey. Four syllables. If you pronounce it Lit-ral-ly, with three syllables and a hard 't', people may accidentally think that you are speaking literally.

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Literally is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand