Brazil

The fag of Brazil.

Brazil is a shitty half-ape infested garbage dump trying to be America, but its people keep stuffing stolen money in their underwear. The Brazilian population is 95% White-black mongrel, 4% Savage, and 1% Asian. As such, they have achieved notoriety on the interweb by being the most computer-retarded people in the planet. They've ravished many online DeviantARTs and games with their imposed faggotry and dumbshittedness, not to mention their English skills. For their extreme noobish and arrogant behavior in many online commonplaces, they are often labeled Brs.

Excellent command of the English language.

The Internets is arguably a more serious business in Brazil than anywhere else. In no other place can people be kidnapped over a shitty online game account and cause a national commotion and lulz storm.

The south of Brazil has the hottest girls that God has ever seen and over 9000 internet abusers realize that the girls in their shitty state are nowhere near these beauties. A normal person could look at the plethora of supermodels that originate from this part of the world, or pedos could look at beach lolis.

Brazil's current 8-year term president, cleaning his nose with what is most likely a woman's panties.

A Brazilian man in his native habitat.

Economy

Brazilian economy revolves around prostitution and sex slavery. Whatever you seek, you WILL find it in Brazil. The map below shows the Brazilian economy in all of its diversity.

Brazilians don't need no b

Ethnicity

Brazil's most prominent Jewish leader's mugshot.

Brazil is currently dealing with a large ape infestation.

There are a small number of Jews in Brazil, all of them living in the city of São Paulo. The leader of the Brazilian Jewish community, Henry Sobel, has recently provoked much drama both IRL and on teh internets. He was caught red-handed shoplifting a bunch of ties from a Louis Vuitton store in Palm Beach, California. He then said he felt like some sort of strange force was acting over him, and everyone pointed at the Jews, lol'd, and moved on.

National Sport

The most popular sport in Brazil is child abduction, which they do after soccer season for the lulz. Often, Brazilian men will get a sex change, move to America, marry some faggot weeaboo who only leaves b and his house to buy crack and transvestite hookers. Then they will get knocked up, have the child nine months later, wait like a hungry wolf, then storm off to the airport to steal the child away back to Faggotland. Child abduction is a sophistocated, intricate sport that is scored according to the following point system:

• Making it back successfully: 300 pts.
• Teaching the child Portugese: 50 pts.
• raep: 10 pts. per occurance
• Using the Brazilian legal system to cover your ass: 5,000 pts.
• Turning the child gay: 100 pts.
• Convince the child to do porn: 50 pts.
• Make the child a Dallas Cowboys fan: 100 pts.
• Turning the father gay: 300 pts.
• Sucker the biological father to come to Brazil to fight for custody, just to be pushed through the gauntlet of surgically enchanced dicks (see Brazilian legal system): 1000 pts. per occurance.

The current world champion of Brazilian child abduction is Bruna Bianchi, scoring a world record of 3,451,900 points for the abduction of Sean Goldman in 2004. She died in 2008 from doing what she did best, sucking cocks. The autopsy reports that she suffered from asphyxiation due to having nine dicks in her mouth at once. She also holds the world record for the most Cleveland steamers received and biggest pussy mole.

Gay acceptance

The Brazilian gay migratory patterns.

Can you spot the real woman in that picture?

Brazil is internationally renowned as the world's capital of faggotry. There it is common to see tons of colorful people parading through the streets to prove that it is okay to be fabulous. In fact, there is such acceptance from the society that they hold contests to see who is the gayest of the gay.

If you are looking to go to Brazil, then know that it is easy for you to find good places to go to as the country is infested with happy people such as yourself and your mom.

Transvestites/Transsexuals

Lulz, no rly.

Known for transsexuals and bestiality.

Since the Brazilian population is made up primarily of niggers, faggots and hott wimmins, it is only logical to assume that some of those would cross the line. In pretty much any major city, at least 10% of the population will be made up of transvestites. In fact, they have even gone beyond and started showing up in other countries. They are also very famous in porn, achieving notoriety among homos like Something Awful goons who constantly fap to Brazilian transvestite or transgender porn. This notoriety is possible thanks to the herculean effort of many foreign male tourists who still love biting a sausage more than eating a pussy in Brazil.

It is common for newcomers to Brazil to find that women are more often men, specially if found lurking around cheap bars. They are also known to lurk around schools, parks and any other public places. This is much more common and socially accepted in Brazil than in America, as tells this account of a persecuted transvestite:

"I am a Scottish transvestite/homosexual who moved from the USA to Brazil. I find people more accepting of my lifestyle here, whereas in the snobby states of America people look down upon you just because you prefer to dress differently, or prefer different behavior. I'll never forget the dirty looks and hushed mumbles I used to get just for walking down the street wearing fishnet stockings and a leopard print g-string."

-Anonymous

Sick Americans. Not even leopard print g-string?

Body Language

Since apes have not fully mastered a civilized language, moving your body is the only form of communication with the natives.

• For instance, in Brazilian, walking down a boulevard wearing socks and sandals means "My foreign money is too much of a weight on my back pocket, please mug me!"
• Neying your head or repeating no, or nao several times means "Yes of course I am interested in buying yet another plaster copy of the Christ instead of enjoying the beach, please ask me again persistently"
• Vaguely looking at a girl's ass means "I'm into transvestites and willing to pay and then get mugged at my hotel to suck a young favelinho STD syringe while wearing a leopard print G-string!

Culture

Best things to come out of Brazil next to cheap labor.

This map shows Brazil's capital.

A fan showing her devotion to the team by distracting the other team which isn't gay.

Brazil's culture consists of two things: soccer and women. If you don't like soccer in Brazil, you likely fall into the she-male category. They pride themselves in the fact that they have won the World Cup more times than anyone else, even though it doesn't really matter because any good Brazilian player doesn't play in Brazil anyways. In Brazil, it is also considered a religion. But one of the main reasons that Brazilians are so fast, and have good reflexes (used only for the purpose of soccer and chasing little white girls) is because they spend their whole childhood stealing bread and running away from the police up to the hills in which crack is more of a citizen than dirt to ground.

A common hobby of many Brazilians is to rape, steal and kill people just for the lulz. They even made a movie about it (No RLY!). Although many people are outraged by the current situation of crime in the country, government officials are often confused as to why people are so worried since it's been happening ever since they can remember.

Brazil is also famous for it's wimmenz with nice asses. Although true that they exist, it is hard to find one outside of the beaches of Rio de Janeiro. Many silly people go to the nation's copy of New York, São Paulo, thinking they will find nice assed easy-to-get women, only to find more transvestites. In Rio, they will get not only women, but also a bullet in the forehead. Consider that a bonus.

Typical Dishes

Brazilians have over 9000 regional dishes. Their main national dish is consisted of the shitty parts of pork no other nation will touch with a ten foot pole, and bananas...on account that all Brazilians are nigras. It's like eating haggis but in a tropical place.

Other things Brazilians eat are:

• Beans
• Manioc
• Watermelons

History

It is fact that Brazil was founded by criminals and niggers sent away from Portugal since they refused to steal only from the peasants. Many African slaves went to Brazil after being promised fried chicken and watermelon. After having created a semi-functional society, they based their nationalism on raping and chopping off Indian woman's hands and mutilating their genitals. This is also known as colonialism. The remainder of the Indians were shipped to the North Pole where they established fishing colonies and became Eskimos.

Typical Brazilian products of the 16th century.

After that, they buttfucked the nature of the land, devastating forests while mining for gold which wasn't so hard to find, but they still had little success at that what with the nigras kept hiding the gold nuggets in their anuses, and the fact that they weren't great negotiators. The original deal with Portugal was that the Empire was to keep 200% of every piece of gold found while the rest went to the locals. Naturally the Brazilians loved the second part of the deal and strived to rape the land as much as they could in order to get some out of the deal. After they realized their stupidity, they decided to plant sugar cane and then coffee beans. After a couple hundred years of slow business there they quit at everything and remained poor until the early 90s when they invented Carnival. A scheme created by Brazilian trolls to gain wealth by attracting poor, unsuspecting tourists with young women and caipirinha. After the tourists tire of sexual escapades, millions of niggers attack said tourists, rob them of their money, jewelry and shoes, and repeat the scheme for five days. After that, on the 6th day, set the buses that go to the airport on fire for the lulz. They call that day "Quarta-feira de Cinzas" or "Ash Wednesday."

Also, sometime around last Thursday, they fought back against the oppressive rule of Portugal to create their own independent corrupt government. To prove themselves a developed society, they harbored Nazi war criminals to strenghten the national economy. Until recently, it was dominated by the military as all South American nations have at some point.

Brazil's only win ever was earned at the Paraguay War, when said country was pwned through use of the warfare tactic known as Arrastão, or nigger rush.

People

Full Brazilian.

Brazilians are notoriously known for infesting Warcraft 3 realms, dominantly Eurobattle.net. They have also completely taken over US Warsong server on WoW. They are easy to identify, as they form approximately 80% of the players throughout the day. They can also be identified by the following traits:

• Never speaks English, ignores common phrases such as "from?".
• Sometimes uses Babelfish (moar like Babelshit, amirite?) translations to English in forums, resulting in high levels of lulz.
• Immediately quits the game when his hero dies for the first time
• When someone loads a map four times as slow as you, it is undoubtedly a Brazilian.
• Name consists solely of lowercase letters, though recently many Brazilians have adopted names with differing uppercase letters, even adding leetspeak in order to fool others. They can still be identified by obvious Portuguese influences or added stupid number combinations such as 123456 or 666.
• Are known for their obnoxiously retarded laughs, for example:
  • HAUAHAUhaauhuAHAUHSUAHSUHUAHUAHAUHA
  • UASDSUADUDHASUDHASDUHASDUHASDUHASDUHSUDHASDHU
  • AEHUEIHAE
  • haIUEUAIEHIuheiuHEUIAheuiHEUIAHEIhaeiuheuiHAIE
  • shushsuhsushsuhsushushs
  • skaposksoaksopdjapd
  • RSRSRSRS
  • FUCK NOOOOOOOOB SPARTAN AHDUSHDUASHDUAHUHAUAHADUASHUAHUAHUDA

Typical Brazilian Conversation - Now with HUEUHEHUEU

• Now speaking about soccer, Brazil claims to be the best country in the world but after seeing the fat-ass of Ronaldo and the defeat against Argentina in the Olympics, we discovered the truth that they can only build faulty spaceships which explode before takeoff. Brazil is also the bitch of Argentina.

Trivia

Did you know that:

• The Brazilians only recently discovered the wheel?
• In some places, Brazilians wear clothes?
• It's legal to piss on the street, litter and drive on the wrong lane in Brazil if you do it for the lulz?
• Orkut is the official website of Brazil?
• Wearing money in your underwear is a common trend? Everyone does it.
• You can buy AIDS for R$ 5.00 bucks?
• Brazilian kids train at teh seks with baboons and other monkeys before going to the town whore when they turn 6 years old?
• Brazilians are also known as "Jungle Niggers?"
• Brazilians are known for creating the best free downland to learn Esperanto? Only downside is the Brazilian accent.
• Brazil's watermelon agriculture is in crisis due to teh constant black person raids?
• They can't speak worth shit in English or Spanish!!!!?

See also

• 55chan - Their shitty imageboard.
• Argentina
• Bolivia
• Branca - notorious Brazilian Mary Sue fantard who raped Gorillaz and, like many Brazilians, invaded Deviantart, Orkut and Twitter.

  

  White panties...

• Brazilian Rabbi Accused of Shoplifting - Brazilian Jew leader got V&
• Colombia
• Gang Kidnaps Gamer to Get Password Using Fake Orkut Date - More on lulzy kidnapping over Gunbound.
• Guyana
• Massachusetts AKA Brazilian World Headquarters.
• Paraguay
• Peru
• Soccer - Brazil's official religion.
• South America
• Suriname
• Tibia - a shitty RPG game that the Brazilians have destroyed. - Always been shitty.
• Uruguay
• Venezuela