Hypno

Back in the days of Pokémon Red and Blue, when the Psychic-type reigned supreme and raep'd everything in its path, there was simply no excuse for not having a Psychic Pokémon on your team. Why, with the ability to tear their enemies minds apart through psychokinetic power, you'd be stupid not to have one - motherfuckers got their shit stabbed the fuck up if they didn't. That was just how people rolled back then, you get me?

But while it was common to see trainers packing an Alakazam or a Mewtwo, there was one Psychic-type that you seldom saw anybody using.

And there was a very good reason for that.

Biology

	“	It carries a pendulum-like device. There once was an incident in which it took away a child it hypnotized.	„
	—The chillingly vague Pokédex entry for Hypno, which seems to raise more questions than it answers.

Jew Hypno is the 97th Pokémon in the Pokédex and the evolved form of Drowzee.

A strange, disturbingly human-like, bipedal creature with yellow skin and a prominent, beaky nose, Hypno has an odd appearance even by the standards of some of the other weird shit you see in the Pokédex. The creature invariably carries a pendulum in its left (or, sinister) hand, although no explanation has been given as to where it acquired such an object. Indeed, there is precious little information known about Hypno.

What is known, however, is that Hypno are able to use the power of hypnosis to put their victims to sleep and then feast upon their dreams. If they're not so lucky, it is likely certain that Hypno will then devour their innocence. And then their flesh.

Because of this, some Pokémon Professors argue that there may be some link between Hypno and another creature that preys upon children, although this has yet to be proven.

Hypno's Lullaby

“	Come, little children, Come with me. Safe and happy, you will be. Away from home, now let us run, With Hypno, you'll have so much fun! Oh, little children, please don't cry. Hypno wouldn't hurt a fly! Be free to frolic, be free to play, Come with me to my cave to stay. Oh, little children, please don't squirm, These ropes, I know, will hold you firm. Now, look to me, the pendant calls Back and forth, your eyelids fall. Oh, little children, you cannot leave. For you, your families will grieve. Minds unravelling at the seams, Allowing me to haunt their dreams. Do not wail and do not weep. It's time for you to go to sleep. Little children, you were not clever, Now you'll stay with me forever...	„

See Also

• Pokémon
• Pedophile
• Child Abduction
• Date Rape
• Creepypasta
• Isabella Valentine
• Judaism

Hypno is part of a series on Pokémon [Gotta catch ’em all!Who’s that Pokémon?]
A FUCKING POKEMON Abra	Aggron Aggron	Alakazam Alakazam	Bidoof Bidoof	Blastoise Blastoise
Braixen Braixen	Breloom Breloom	Charizard Charizard	Cloyster Cloyster	Ditto Ditto
Empoleon Empoleon	Empoleon Espeon	Garchomp Garchomp	Gardevoir Gardevoir	Hypno Hypno
Jynx Jynx	Jigglypuff Jigglypuff	Kadabra Kadabra	It's a Kirby, retard Kirby	Koffing Koffing
Lanturn Lanturn	Cunnilingus Lickitung	Lopunny Lopunny	Lucario Lucario	Lugia Lugia
Metapod Metapod	Mewtwo Mewtwo	Mistystuffer Misty	Mudkip Mudkip	Twitch Plays Pokemon Omanyte
Pikaman Pikaman	Pokemon Go Pokémon Go	Swirlface Poliwhirl	Porygon Porygon	Primeape Primeape
Probopass Probopass	JustinRPG Reshiram	Riolu Riolu	FUCK_YEAH_SEAKING Seaking	Shaymin Shaymin
Shiny Pidgey Shiny Pidgey	Slowpoke Slowpoke	Smugleaf Smugleaf	Snorlax Snorlax	Snover Snover
Squirtle Squirtle	Suicune Suicune	Vileplume Vileplume	Xatu Xatu	Zoroark Zoroark