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Denmark
Denmark is a boring ass country with nothing but Sand niggers and snow. The government picks up the snow from Greenland to get rid of the Sand niggers, but it doesn't help. Therefore they send some of them to Iceland. Also, the danes once were vikings, but the organization of banned NAMBLA members named EU decided that Denmark should be civilized like the rest of the wonderful countries in Europe, so now they fail at raping other countries (as shown at one of the pictures to the right). The vikings went sailing in their boats to what they called "Britfag Land" to rape their women and raid their homes for the l00t lulz. But one thing do the danes still have in common with the vikings... they all start drinking at the age of 13.
The Danish language consists of throwing up and making wierd noises.
History
Legoland (also known as Denmark) is a small communist country in Scandinavia. It is ruled by an old whore named Queen Margrethe II who's gonna die in a few years from alcoholic diseases. Denmark is known for making Lego, the letters ÆØÅ and the Muhammad Cartoons. They spend 26% of their lifes on drinking, 57% of their lifes sleeping after they drink and 17% of their life on life.
Basic education in Denmark is still l00ting school, a holdover from Viking times. To pass ninth grade, you must l00t 3 things from your burning teacher, while raping his women, cursing his art and being over 9000% drunk at the same time. This makes Danish culture rather similar to that of the negro.
Politics
Denmark's politics is based on 3 paragraphs, as no Dane is capable of being in charge of the country (apart from the alcoholic and narcotic Queen Margrethe II and Lars Løkke Rasmussen who doesn't do shit anyway).
§1 - l00t
§1.1 - 1 kg of l00t or less counts for 50 xp.
§1.2 - 1-5 kg of l00t counts for 100 xp.
§1.3 - 5-10 kg of l00t counts for 250 xp and the amount of kg in spareribs.
§1.4 - 10 kg of l00t counts for 500 xp and the amount of kg in spareribs.
§2 - Rape
§2.1 - Rape a woman and finish under 5 minutes counts for 50 xp.
§2.2 - Rape a woman and finish in 5-10 minutes counts for 100 xp.
§2.3 - Rape a woman and finish in 10-30 minutes counts for 200 xp and the amount of minutes will count as - (minus) in Øre (the Danish cent) in your taxes (example: 30 minutes will - (minus) 30 Øre or 4 cent everytime you pay taxes.
§2.4 - Rape a woman and finish in 60 minutes or more for 400 xp and the amount of minutes will count as - (minus) in Øre (the Danish cent) in your taxes (example: 60 minutes will - (minus) 60 Øre (1 krone) or 8 cent everytime you pay taxes.
§3 - Wimmins
§3.1 - If your bitch says no to your request, you either hit it, cap it's head off or KILL IT WITH FIRE.
§3.2 - Wimmins imported from Amsterdam, Germany and Sweden can be rented from 09:00-03:00 (9 am to 3 am) from the Copenhagen City Hall for 250 kr. ($43). Delivery costs 50 kr. ($9) extra.
Economy
.
Denmark's main export is Legos; second to that are dairy products, followed closely by cartoons of Muhammad. The Danes were great looters back in the day, and there are a small remaining group of Vikings who have avoided contact with the modern world and have been known to raid merchant ships bound for Narvik, Norway.
The only things that Danes import are Swedes, who come, drink all the booze in the country, and piss everywhere. This, of course, angers the used-to-be-vikings, but because they are now Socialist hippies, they don't do anything about it.
Inventions
Denmark's inventions are numerous and epic from Danish bacon and Danish pastry, to the pedo storyteller Hans Christian Anderson to Tycho Brahe's psychic midget Jebb and alcoholic pet moose, (who fell down the stairs whilst drunk and died), thus prophesying Fahrenheit 9/11.
Language
Every girl in Denmark likes charming dirty sentences, and here are one of the best.
Your beautiful eyes make me think about my hairy balls - Dine smukke øjne får mig til at tænke på mine behårede boller.
Equal Opportunity
Denmark is world famous for their woman friendly labor market. If a woman wants a job in Denmark, she just has to have an education from the porn industry and blonde hair. Actually only 56% of the women in Denmark are employed in the porn industry the rest are in prison, but about 1% are hardcore lesbos.
Food Culture in Denmark
The average Dane eats whatever he/she can get with alcohol in/on it. This means, for example, that no normal Dane would have any problems drinking only beer for breakfast, anything else alcoholic goes just as well. And then just keep drinking beer the rest of the day until he/she passes out. The rich Danes, however, may exchange the alcohol with actual food. And then down some bottles o' wine for dessert.
Gay Culture in Denmark
The gay culture in Denmark has expanded to a degree for which there are no words nor sentences to describe. Too many young Danish boys seek to become gayer than the rest, resulting in gay bars having to invent membership systems to prevent their bars being overrun by what seems like a lot of homosexuals, but most likely includes a significant number of what are in fact, very, very confused heterosexuals. And now with the release of the award winning Danish film BRODERSKAB, even the Nationalist Right, aka Neo-Nazis, are going gay. That's right, two of the most unlikely bed fellows are now fucking like rabbits in Denmark. It doesn't get any better than this.
Racist culture in Denmark
Now apart from the above mentioned Gay-Neo-Nazism that is apparently flourishing in Denmark, there is also quite a bit of good old fashioned racism. Here is some sensitive and insightful Danish commentary on our colored cousins:
[00:19] ShadowCrush: srs DK is full of them [00:20] ShadowCrush: they're "fleein'" from they battle they say [00:20] ShadowCrush: thourgh, I know it's a tactic [00:20] eins: ic [00:20] eins: lol [00:20] ShadowCrush: to DESTROY THE HUMANKIND!!! [00:20] eins: OMFG [00:20] ShadowCrush: they arn't humans [00:20] eins: they are sand monkeys [00:20] ShadowCrush: they're more like... monkeys [00:20] ShadowCrush: yeah [00:20] ShadowCrush: sand monkeys [00:21] eins: lol [00:21] eins: towel heads [00:21] ShadowCrush: wam. sand monkeys? [00:21] eins: lol [00:21] ShadowCrush: nm [00:21] ShadowCrush: they gotta be stopped [00:21] ShadowCrush: send in China [00:22] ShadowCrush: they gotta have the biggest army in world [00:22] ShadowCrush: just why don't those sand monkeys have a brain? [00:22] eins: i think they do [00:22] eins: but its smaller [00:23] ShadowCrush: what? they have a brain? [00:23] ShadowCrush: where? [00:23] ShadowCrush: since when? [00:23] ShadowCrush: how? [00:23] eins: its just small [00:23] eins: liek an ant's [00:23] ShadowCrush: probably smaller [00:24] ShadowCrush: black shit of the south. well, here they are, no offence [00:25] eins: to bad the duke of edinburgh is no loger a danish prince
Danish sites
- dnsb.info - Above mentioned danish Nazi Party
See Also
- Tubcat
- Danish - Their incredibly gay language
- Europe
- Iceland
- Norway
- Rita - A forced meme on 4chan that supposedly came from some Danish cartoon.
- Sweden
- humon - the latest Danish Cancer on DevianTART
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