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{{warning|<big>Advertising is another method used by the [[Jews]] to extort money from you.<br>[[You]] can help yourself by not falling for their petty scams.</big>}}
 
[[File:AnimeAd.png|frameless|center]]
<center>
{|class="boilerplate" id="pd" style="background-color:#fff;border:2px solid #000;padding:0px" cellpadding=3px cellspacing=0
|bgcolor=#fff|[[Image:No cowbell small.jpg|50px|link=]]
|<big>'''This [[article]] does not need an entire list of all the ads you fell for.'''</big><br>'''[[You]] can help by not doing that.'''
|}
</center>
[[Image:KodakLogoComparison.gif|thumb]]
[[Image:KodakLogoComparison.gif|thumb]]
[[Image:MJtoys.gif|thumb]]
[[Image:Lollershop-145x145.gif|thumb]]
[[Image:Pigirl.jpg|thumb|Honesty in advertising is rare but always appreciated.]]
[[Image:JewAdvertising.jpg|thumb|The jews are obviously controlling our thoughts]]


'''Advertising''' is the [[Hookers and Blow|promotion of goods and services]], usually paid for by the [[jews|providers of said stuff]]. If [[Jew Gold]] is the root of all evil, then advertising is the fertiliser. Advertising is also the #1 product of America. In fact, in the age of [[NAFTA|free trade]] and everything [[shit|Made in China]], advertising is about the only thing that America actually makes any more. Accordingly, advertising is the de-facto 'gasoline' that drives the whole US economy and, in turn, that of the whole world. If consumers -the beasts of burden upon which [[capitalism]] is born are deprived of information as to the wealth of crap available to make them truly [[lies|happy and successful]] in life, then they will not know what to spend their hard earned, disposable income on and -in turn- deprive businessmen of obscene wealth.


Advertising also [[owns]] the Internets; the oil that lubes [[the tubes]]. Contrary to popular belief, the Internet is [[derp|not free]] and does not run on [[magic|fairy dust]]. For example, if you have a [[ED|popular, growing site]] that increasingly demands additional and larger tubes to deliver the abundance of [[lulz|product]] for a continually [[EDiots|growing audience]] -along with fully functional [[server|pumps and storage tanks]] for all the Internets- but can't find [[jews]] willing to part with [[money|their precious]] for [[niggers|whatever reason]], the [[Girlvinyl|site owners]] will be hard pressed to keep on providing finely crafted infotainment (such as [[lulz]], [[drama]] and [[LNN|happenings]]) out of their own pockets and the goodness of their heart. If the demand, then, overwhelms the supply, the tubes will [[ED is slow|start to back-up]] and eventually burst and necessitate the [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|cessation of services]] unless [[donations|alternative funding]] can be found.
'''Advertising''' is the promotion of [[Hookers and Blow|goods and services]], usually paid for by the [[jews|providers of said stuff]]. If [[Jew Gold]] is the root of all evil, then advertising is the fertiliser. Advertising is also the #1 product of America, in fact, in the age of [[NAFTA|free trade]] and everything [[shit|Made in China]], advertising is about the only thing that America actually makes any more. Accordingly, advertising is the de-facto 'gasoline' that drives the whole US economy and, in turn, that of the whole world. If consumers, the beasts of burden upon which [[capitalism]] is born are deprived of information as to the wealth of crap available to make them truly [[lies|happy and successful]] in life, then they will not know what to spend their hard earned, disposable income on and deprive businessmen of obscene wealth.


Advertising is a method where a certain product or series of products are brought to the masses via various medias.
Advertising also [[owns]] the Internet. Contrary to popular belief, the Internet is not [[free]] and does not run on [[gay|magic fairy dust]]. For example, if you have a [[ED|popular, growing site]] that increasingly demands additional and larger tubes to deliver the abundance of product for a continually [[EDiots|growing audience]], along with fully functional [[server|pumps and storage tanks]] for all of the Internets, but can't find [[Jews]] willing to part with their precious money, the [[Girlvinyl|site owners]] will be hard pressed to keep on providing finely crafted [[infotainment]] (such as [[lulz]], [[drama]] and [[LNN|happenings]]) out of their own pockets and the goodness of their heart. If the demand overwhelms the supply, the tubes will [[ED is slow|start to back-up]] and eventually burst and necessitate the [[DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING|cessation of services]] unless [[donations|alternative funding]] is available.
i.e: Radio, TV, Street adds and the colorful shit that is covering the shirt of your favourite soccer player.  


The basic idea of advertising itself isn't a bad one and there is nothing wrong in advertising your product to the possible buyers, how else would they know about your wonderful products, such as "easy toothbrush" and "Hawaii chair" (mentioned items can be found from this [http://www.esquire.com/the-side/video/five-useless-products link]).
The basic idea of advertising itself isn't a bad one and there is nothing wrong in advertising your product to the possible buyers, how else would they know about your [[cool|wonderful products]], such as "easy toothbrush" and "[[Hawaii]] chair"?


==Advertising on the [[Internets]]==
One way that advertising has taken prominence since the 21st century is advertising via the Internet. Most of the ads you see are the banner ads that usually lead to a "[[raep|meet and fuck]]" site, or some other faggot's [[Tumblr]] page that [[nobody gives a shit]] about. Another kind of annoying ad are the autoplay video ads for some boring shit such as kids clothing and [[drugs|crystal meth]]. Nobody ever goes to their sites because the ads are annoying as fuck and only make people rage at their computer screens. Also, let us not forget those [[shitty]] pre-video youtube advertisements that everyone hates and that only makes them rage harder. Aside from all other forms of advertising, [[OTI]] ads are probably the most annoying bundles of shit the 21st century has to offer.


==Abusing Advertisement==
===How to circumvent the ads===
In need to of moar monies and [[Jew Gold]], the marketing men and [[Whore|Women]] have developed various techniques to achieve said valuables, such as false advertisiment and junkmail. With these two great methods, the sales have skyrocketed and market now controls the goverments of the world.
It's easy. It's so easy that anyone could do it. Follow the steps below for a simple, ad-free browsing experience:
#First, if you are running [[Internet Explorer|IE]] (any version), delete it. IE doesn't support any kind of ad blocking [[software]].
#'''Install [[Google]] Chrome''', Chrome is of [[the best]] internet browsers out there. It kicks the ever-loving shit out of IE.
#Type '''[https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/adblock/gighmmpiobklfepjocnamgkkbiglidom?hl=en adblock]''' in the search engine and click the first link that pops up. (or click on the embedded link, dummy!)
#Click '''add to Chrome''', a message will pop up and ask if you're sure. Click 'add'.
#[[????]]
#'''PROFIT'''


Enjoy your ad-free browsing experience. This will likely make the Jews butthurt that you are blocking their shitty ads. Another reason to use this ever-so-prestigious software.


By using this superior marketing technique, the salesman and big corporate bosses have build great bussiness imperiums.
==Types of Advertisements==
In need to of moar monies and [[Jew Gold]], the marketing men and [[Whore|Women]] have developed various techniques to achieve said valuables, such as false advertisiment and junkmail. With these two great methods, the sales have skyrocketed and market now controls the goverments of the world. By using this superior marketing technique, the salesman and big corporate bosses have build great bussiness imperiums.
This comes in 3 diffirent levels, depending on how bad the product itself is, since good products don't need such methods.
This comes in 3 diffirent levels, depending on how bad the product itself is, since good products don't need such methods.


=== Level 1: Deceiving advertisement ===
===Deceiving Advertisement===
[[File:25 inappropriate ronald mcdonald photos 20090520 1512639975.jpg|thumb|left| [[Haters gonna hate|You jelly?]] ]]
This is the least abusive method, which is used to make the product at hand to appear better than it actually is by using various backgrounds and [[Lensflare|lighting methods]], or using [[Fyre Festival|sexy females to advertise the product]]. The japanese love to do this. Just look at the [[Negress|McDonald's girl]]. For example, fast food restaurants use this level one method to sell their [[shit|food]] to the [[Fat|hungry]] masses.
This is the least abusive method, which is used to make the product at hand to appear better than it actually is by using various backgrounds and lighting methods, or using [[photomanip|sexy females]] to advertise the product.
 
For example, fast food restaurants use this level one method to sell their [[shit|food]] to the hungry masses.
 
=== Level 2: Misleading advertisements ===
This is a very common method in the marketing business, where the company misleads the consumer with seducing images that makes the [[pervert|average male]] in you want to [[I came|explode]] in their pants upon seeing the advertisement.
 
Misleading images can range from [[your mom|hot women]] wanting in your pants, before and [[failure|after]] pictures of [[small|your dick]], or you [[Impossible|successfully]] trolling 4chan with [[drama|3 easy steps]].  
 
 


===Misleading Advertisements===
This is a very common method in the marketing business, where the company misleads the consumer with seductive images that make the [[pervert|average male]] in you want to [[I came|explode]] in their pants upon seeing the advertisement. Misleading images can range from [[your mom|hot women]] wanting in your pants, before and [[failure|after]] pictures of [[small|your dick]], or you [[Impossible|successfully]] trolling 4chan with [[drama|3 easy steps]].


 
===Blatant Lies About Your Shit===
 
[[File:Wrinkles4626131.jpg|thumb|Typical online advertisement only [[you]] would fall for]]
 
 
Advertisements follow the similar formula:
<br/>
# Whore yourself out as much as possible
# [[????]]
# [[PROFIT]]!!!
 
-Wanna sell your new useless cola brand? Don't worry, just have some famous character drinking your shit(liek santa-clause, naruto or some fappaple material) and BOOOM, your sales go up like a horny cock, when all fanbois and galls drink your poisonous product made of battery acid and diherria.
 
=== Level 3: Outright lying about your shit ===
[[File:Wrinkles4626131.jpg|thumb|left|Typical online advertisement only [[you]] would fall for]]
[[File:Michael jackson lace front wig.jpg|thumb|right|[[pedobear|Michael Jackson]] black to white pills, they really work!]]
[[File:Michael jackson lace front wig.jpg|thumb|right|[[pedobear|Michael Jackson]] black to white pills, they really work!]]
The most desperate method of advertisement, usually used via junkmail and by the street peddlers in some third world countries, like Canada and Britannia.
The most desperate and [[retard|effective]] method of advertisement, usually sent as junkmail. This can range from [[Indian]] telemarketers claiming there's something wrong with your internet connection to street drug dealers and [[Nigerian scam|Nigerian scammers]] in third world countries. If you manage to fall for one of these scams, you are officially a complete [[fucktard]].


Mostly used to sell you some fake products to make your penis grow 12inch and to give you the athletic body of David Hasselhof.
== Every Advertisement Ever ==


<center>{{frame|<youtube>2YBtspm8j8M</youtube>|border=grey|background=grey}}</center>


== The Truth ==


If the phrase "[[HeadOn|Apply ''Directly'' to the Forehead]]" stuck with you, the ad worked ''exactly'' as intended. Doubly so if you want to make fun of the woman for being a [[retard]] - the only retard in the advertisers' mind is [[you]]. From their point of view, the next time you're looking for headache relief, what's the first brand your mind will flash back to? The one they made sure to repeat [[ADHD|three fucking times]] in the commercial? Oh, right - [[HeadOn|"HeadOn, Apply ''Directly'' to the Forehead]]". Wasn't that a funny meme, now?




== See Also ==


[[File:Vince lollershop ad.jpg|thumb|[[Vince Schlomi]] advertising for [[ED]]]]


== See Also ==
* [[Advertise_on_Encyclopedia_Dramatica|Advertise on ED]]
* [[Porn advertisements]]
* [[Porn advertisements]]
* [[Global economic crisis]]
* [[Global economic crisis]]
Line 76: Line 71:
* [[Spam]]
* [[Spam]]
* [[AdBlock]]
* [[AdBlock]]
{{clear}}
* [[Jews]]
 


{{Language}}
{{Language}}
{{Business}}
{{Business}}
<br/>
<div class="boilerplate metadata" id="stub">''This article is a [[:Category:Stub|stub]]. You can help by [http://www.penis-enlargement-secrets.com/penisenlargement.html expanding your penis]''.</div>
<div class="boilerplate metadata" id="stub">''This article is a [[:Category:Stub|stub]]. You can help by [http://www.penis-enlargement-secrets.com/penisenlargement.html expanding your penis]''.</div>


[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:Internets Phenomena]]
[[Category:Communicae]]

Latest revision as of 00:54, 9 February 2019

Warning!
Advertising is another method used by the Jews to extort money from you.
You can help yourself by not falling for their petty scams.
This article does not need an entire list of all the ads you fell for.
You can help by not doing that.
Honesty in advertising is rare but always appreciated.
The jews are obviously controlling our thoughts


Advertising is the promotion of goods and services, usually paid for by the providers of said stuff. If Jew Gold is the root of all evil, then advertising is the fertiliser. Advertising is also the #1 product of America, in fact, in the age of free trade and everything Made in China, advertising is about the only thing that America actually makes any more. Accordingly, advertising is the de-facto 'gasoline' that drives the whole US economy and, in turn, that of the whole world. If consumers, the beasts of burden upon which capitalism is born are deprived of information as to the wealth of crap available to make them truly happy and successful in life, then they will not know what to spend their hard earned, disposable income on and deprive businessmen of obscene wealth.

Advertising also owns the Internet. Contrary to popular belief, the Internet is not free and does not run on magic fairy dust. For example, if you have a popular, growing site that increasingly demands additional and larger tubes to deliver the abundance of product for a continually growing audience, along with fully functional pumps and storage tanks for all of the Internets, but can't find Jews willing to part with their precious money, the site owners will be hard pressed to keep on providing finely crafted infotainment (such as lulz, drama and happenings) out of their own pockets and the goodness of their heart. If the demand overwhelms the supply, the tubes will start to back-up and eventually burst and necessitate the cessation of services unless alternative funding is available.

The basic idea of advertising itself isn't a bad one and there is nothing wrong in advertising your product to the possible buyers, how else would they know about your wonderful products, such as "easy toothbrush" and "Hawaii chair"?

Advertising on the Internets

One way that advertising has taken prominence since the 21st century is advertising via the Internet. Most of the ads you see are the banner ads that usually lead to a "meet and fuck" site, or some other faggot's Tumblr page that nobody gives a shit about. Another kind of annoying ad are the autoplay video ads for some boring shit such as kids clothing and crystal meth. Nobody ever goes to their sites because the ads are annoying as fuck and only make people rage at their computer screens. Also, let us not forget those shitty pre-video youtube advertisements that everyone hates and that only makes them rage harder. Aside from all other forms of advertising, OTI ads are probably the most annoying bundles of shit the 21st century has to offer.

How to circumvent the ads

It's easy. It's so easy that anyone could do it. Follow the steps below for a simple, ad-free browsing experience:

  1. First, if you are running IE (any version), delete it. IE doesn't support any kind of ad blocking software.
  2. Install Google Chrome, Chrome is of the best internet browsers out there. It kicks the ever-loving shit out of IE.
  3. Type adblock in the search engine and click the first link that pops up. (or click on the embedded link, dummy!)
  4. Click add to Chrome, a message will pop up and ask if you're sure. Click 'add'.
  5. ????
  6. PROFIT

Enjoy your ad-free browsing experience. This will likely make the Jews butthurt that you are blocking their shitty ads. Another reason to use this ever-so-prestigious software.

Types of Advertisements

In need to of moar monies and Jew Gold, the marketing men and Women have developed various techniques to achieve said valuables, such as false advertisiment and junkmail. With these two great methods, the sales have skyrocketed and market now controls the goverments of the world. By using this superior marketing technique, the salesman and big corporate bosses have build great bussiness imperiums. This comes in 3 diffirent levels, depending on how bad the product itself is, since good products don't need such methods.

Deceiving Advertisement

This is the least abusive method, which is used to make the product at hand to appear better than it actually is by using various backgrounds and lighting methods, or using sexy females to advertise the product. The japanese love to do this. Just look at the McDonald's girl. For example, fast food restaurants use this level one method to sell their food to the hungry masses.

Misleading Advertisements

This is a very common method in the marketing business, where the company misleads the consumer with seductive images that make the average male in you want to explode in their pants upon seeing the advertisement. Misleading images can range from hot women wanting in your pants, before and after pictures of your dick, or you successfully trolling 4chan with 3 easy steps.

Blatant Lies About Your Shit

Typical online advertisement only you would fall for
Michael Jackson black to white pills, they really work!

The most desperate and effective method of advertisement, usually sent as junkmail. This can range from Indian telemarketers claiming there's something wrong with your internet connection to street drug dealers and Nigerian scammers in third world countries. If you manage to fall for one of these scams, you are officially a complete fucktard.

Every Advertisement Ever

The Truth

If the phrase "Apply Directly to the Forehead" stuck with you, the ad worked exactly as intended. Doubly so if you want to make fun of the woman for being a retard - the only retard in the advertisers' mind is you. From their point of view, the next time you're looking for headache relief, what's the first brand your mind will flash back to? The one they made sure to repeat three fucking times in the commercial? Oh, right - "HeadOn, Apply Directly to the Forehead". Wasn't that a funny meme, now?


See Also

Vince Schlomi advertising for ED


Advertising is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and Dialects • Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and Usage • Rhetorical Strategies • Poetry • The Politics of Language and Communication • Media • Visual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand
[RecessionInflation]
£€ Advertising is a part of a series on Money $¥
Companies

AdFly • Adobe • Amazon • Apple • AT&T • BDIC • Bell • Bitcoin • Burger King • Celestial Toystore • Comcast • Costco • Disney • DuckDuckGo • eBay • Ethereum • Fox News • GNWT • Google • Happy Madison Productions • IBM • IKEA • Microsoft • McDonald's • MTV • New Media Rockstars • Nintendo • Novell • Oracle Corporation • Patreon • PayPal • Sony • Sun Microsystems • T-Mobile • Verizon • Viacom • Wal-Mart • Wikia • Yahoo • YouTube

People

Bernie Madoff • Bill Gates • Chad Hurley • Gregory Kohs • Hal Turner • Jews • Jimbo Wales • Klaus Schwab • L. Ron Jeremy • Larry Sanger • Lyor Cohen • Mario Laudicina • Martin Shkreli • Steve Chen • Steve Jobs

Ideology / Politics

Austerity • Bailout Plan • Capitalism • Communism • Globalisation • Government • Gun control • Health Care Rage • Iceslave • Judaism • Karl Marx • Obamacare • Ron Paul • Ayn Rand • Randroid • Socialist • Ronald Reagan • Welfare • Zeitgeist Movement • Zeitgeist - The Movie

Selling

Advertising • Bitcoin • Bribery • Extreme Advertising • Billy Mays • Porn Advertisements • Shamwow • Spam • Subservient Chicken • Winnebago Man • George Zimmer

Topics

419 Nigerian Email Scams • The Dot.Com Bubble • Economist • Economy • Foreign Girlfriend • Internet money • Jew Gold • Money • NFTs • Poor • Profit • Rape dollars • Scientology • Toilet Paper Hoarding • Unlimited disposable income

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