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Friends of A-Log
This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck. |
Moar info: Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto.
—AustralatinaArchive, on A-Log's YouTube Channel. |
Like most sufferers of the dreaded 'spergers, Anthony LoGatto has found solace among a nakama not unlike those found in those Japanimation shows he's so fond of. These individuals troll softball targets and long since dried up and high profile lolcows, many parroting A-Log's classic 'segment of video, followed with reaction clip from anime series and a short diatribe on how they need to totally be ashamed of themselves' style of editing, and just like A-Log, a quick Googling reveals several of their own less than flattering quirks.
Despite this, each of these individuals fancy themselves expert commentators and virtually untouchable in the field of pwnage, genuinely thinking nothing of the piles upon piles of faggotry they leave in their wake as they dedicate hours worth of video provoking those they deem inferior.
These individuals are living proof that it is still possible to die alone, no matter how many of your fellow losers you surround yourself with on the Internet.
SpaceScreaminJohn
"Space Screamin'" John Quinteros Jr. is a smug, greasy, frog-faced little spic who serves as A-Log's right hand man and frequent guest and contributor. Unlike most of A-Log's little friends, John claims not to possess Asperger's syndrome or any other form of autism for that matter, which you could argue gives him no excuse for such a shocking lack of self-awareness.
John, like Anthony, spends a great deal of time producing videos dissecting Chris-chan videos and elaborating in great detail how a retarded man is totally acting retarded. He also hits on classics such as Rebecca Black, Justin Bieber fans, Irate Gamer fans and whatever other variety of lulz comes his way. John is also a coward who frequently disables comments on these videos and, when he doesn't, is quick to block any who might voice dissenting opinions that his boring, unfunny videos are anything less than pure epic win.
—John, via his glass house |
As well as providing epic pwnage on classic lolcows such as Sailormoonred1 John is also a prolific writer of Crash Bandicoot, Kingdom Hearts, WWE and Naruto fanfiction.
When not preoccupied thinking up furry smut or new ways of harassing nine year old children on YouTube and calling it a pwnage video, John can be coaxed into making unconvincing threats towards those trolling him; a threat he eventually dealt with by clearing out his YouTube channels, faking flagging attacks in order to move his operations to the relative safety of Blip while making it appear as though he was forced off because of continuous flaggings by people who couldn't deal with his pwnage. Of all of A-Log's followers, John is the most likely to create sockpuppets and alt accounts and can be found hiding under numerous aliases including SpaceScreaminJohn, SpaceScreaminJohn2, coasterfreak14, MisterAnimeFan, narutofreak14, cocofanboy18 and SpaceScreamJohn91.
SpaceScreaminJohn? SpaceScreaminBUTTHURT, more like.
Additional Goodies
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Hey, everyone I know in real life, watch me troll!
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John's userpage on the CWCki - "Look ma! I'm a real troll!" It is worth noting that, according to his edit history, John has contributed nothing to the CWCki outside of his own userpage.
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As soon as I finish 'Naruto's Night Schooling, I'm pwning your ass!
wackyben86
"Wacky" Ben Pulliam is a failed college radio host, whose lack of success on the soundwaves translated into him joining A-Log's pwnage funbunch resulting in dozens of videos and blogs railing cutting edge topics like (fucking shocker) Chris-chan, Jonas Brother fans, movies remakes, and reality television.
He is also offensively ugly, his droopy, flabby face giving him a look of permanent dopey lugubriousity and watching his videos is somewhat akin to sitting across from a creepy, sweaty, mouth breathing guy on the subway who won't stop staring at you.
Previous Video | Next Video |
—wackyben86 |
An admitted autistic, Wacky Ben has cranked out repeated videos about Chris and related retards because of them making the real autistics look bad. The end result is an embarrassing mishmash of Ben spouting beaten to death jokes in addition to his terribly awkward attempts to come up with his own material.
NeuGristle87
Following a proud tradition, Dustin Hooper is yet another whiny autistic in A-Log's circle of trust that makes mocking videos of easy targets on YouTube to draw attention away from his own lulzteat.
Desperately trying to cultivate an aura of being creepy and mysterious just like his favourite band Throbbing Gristle, NeuGristle can be found taking time out of his video production to write vampire fanfic on deviantArt. Because of this, Dustin is just as susceptible to taunting as the LOLSCOWS as he himself is so quick to troll.
A totally original Chris-chan video. Previous Video | Next Video |
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What kind of troll are you? ALL YOU DID WAS PISS PEOPLE OFF!
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Me and mah piece.
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All aboard the bandwagon!
MsUmlaut
MsUmlaut is a bisexual goth with Asperger's syndrome who, is the token girl of the group. MsUmlaut spends most of her days making AMVs but, like the rest of A-Log's merry band, MsUmlaut also likes to make unfunny troll shielding commentaries and rant videos about Chris-chan and other easy targets.
An example of MsUmlaut's shitty YouTube videos can be seen below, in a video where she makes A-Log, Wacky Ben and NeuGristle watch some yaoi shota shit with an unpronouncable Japanese name and then freak out over what are, essentially DRAWINGS of traps and gay sex. Because, y'know, A-Log and his pals are STRAIGHT and watching something like that is just awful and disturbing for them. When they see a dick, they just look away with a brief moment of being freaked out.
Unlike the rest of A-Log's dorky little friends who can just barely pass as human, MsUmlaut is actually fairly normal-looking and somewhat attractive and, as such, is the subject of much clumsy aspie flirtation from A-Log and his fellow virginal manchildren.
Potential suitors should be warned, however, for as well as being obsessed with Alice in Wonderland and Carnevil, she is also a raging weeaboo and yaoi fangirl who gets very butthurt if people criticise her artwork...
—MsUmlaut bitching in her journal on deviantArt |
Some argue that MsUmlaut has a fascination with the idea of being able to spurn the advances of socially awkward nerdy men (thus making her the epitome of 'Don't hit on me, silly boys!') because she is a drooling yaoi fangirl and knows she is not that hot, so most normal men wouldn't put up with her faggotry, which is why she has to resort to the company of A-Log and other retarded manchildren, the dregs of masculinity, to inflate her ego and make her feel good - hence her fanart depicting an idealised anime version of herself being stalked by Chris-chan.
MsUmlaut closed her YouTube account recently, likely due to butthurt over her inclusion in this very article. However, you can still track her down...
- Skype: Lucida_Von_Tokkentakker
- Her MySpace
- Her deviantArt
- Her profile on Anime Music Videos.org
- Her Wii Friendcode: 1978-1943-4713 - Why not play Super Smash Bros with MsUmlaut?
Pikachu0Z
/vp/ incarnate, Pikachu0Z, formerly known as Lugia0, is almost thirty years old and is obsessed with Pokémon.
Like Chris-chan, Pikachu0Z is a native of Virginia and a welfare leech, claiming disability benefit because of his autism instead of working for his money even though he is obviously capable of doing so. Most of his commentaries focus on - surprise, surprise - easy targets such as Sailormoonred1, Justin Bieber and Jonas Brothers fangirls and, of course, Christian Weston Chandler.
It is interesting to note that though much of Pikachu0Z's material comes from ripping on those who take their interests too seriously, when one insults his fandom of choice, Pokémon, he immediately turns into a raging volcano of nerd rage.
Previous Video | Next Video |
A mysterious figure, Pikachu0Z never shows his face on camera, choosing instead to hide behind the visage of his namesake, lovable Pokémon mascot, Pikachu, most likely as an attempt to endear himself to and gain the trust of impressionable children.
- Pikachu0Z's Wikitubia article, blatantly written by Pikachu0Z himself
- His deviantArt profile
- His Facebook fanpage, revealing how popular he is.
- Pikachu0Z's MyAnimeList page, showing you what your tax dollars are paying for
By Our Powers Combined
Every now and again, A-Log will team up with his chucklefuck nakama and perform a commentary with them over Skype, like a sort of YouTube retard supergroup. When such an event occurs, the end result is a painfully unfunny spergfest of a video in which A-Log, SpaceScreaminJohn, Wackyben86 and countless other members of A-Log's circle of friends fall over eachother in their haste to make weak jokes and pop culture references. It makes every awkward, unfunny, poorly acted TGWTG crossover look like a masterclass of comedy. It is not merely abysmal, it is the Abyss.
A fine example of such faggotry can be seen below. Behold, four unattractive, basement-dwelling male virgins making fun of a slightly older, fatter, unattractive, basement-dwelling male virgin.
See Also
- Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto - He's the leader of the bunch, you know him well.
- YouTube Commentaries
- YouTube Nobodies
- Troll shielding
- Autism
- Asperger's Syndrome
- Hypocrisy
- Unwarranted self-importance
- Christian Weston Chandler
- That Guy With The Glasses - Whom A-Log and all his little friends so desperately want to be.
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