Registration has been disabled and the moderation extension has been turned off.
Contact an admin on Discord or EDF if you want an account. Also fuck bots.

The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch: Difference between revisions

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
imported>Kamaloka
Created page with "{{corner|165px}} {{WIP}} {{welfare}} {{clear}} center {{RainbowSlant|THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN}} '''T..."
 
imported>CosmicSewerHobo
Line 84: Line 84:
==External Links==
==External Links==
*{{twitter|@TenaciousRanch|Twatter}}
*{{twitter|@TenaciousRanch|Twatter}}
*{{kf|https://kiwifarms.net/threads/the-tenacious-unicorn-ranch-tenaciousranch-steampunk-penny-penellope-logue-phillip-matthew-logue.86681/|Go ahead, read the Kiwi Farms thread. It will only take you 2-3 weeks.}}
*{{kf|the-tenacious-unicorn-ranch-tenaciousranch-steampunk-penny-penellope-logue-phillip-matthew-logue.86681/|Go ahead, read the Kiwi Farms thread. It will only take you 2-3 weeks.}}
*[https://www.tenaciousunicornranch.com/ Official Website]
*[https://www.tenaciousunicornranch.com/ Official Website]
*[https://www.etsy.com/shop/Tenaciousunicorn Etsy]
*[https://www.etsy.com/shop/Tenaciousunicorn Etsy]

Revision as of 14:04, 5 January 2022

HOLD IT! STEP THE FUCK OFF!
The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch looks like shit but it is NOT a {{crapstub}}. It is a work in progress!
If you require assistance beefing up this article, then hit up the experts on our IRC.

This article is paid for by taxpayers like you.
Thanks, America.
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN
THREE STUNNING AND BRAVE WOMYN

The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch is an alpaca ranch ran by trannies located in Westcliffe, Colorado in an attempt to create an IRL safe space away from dirty cis scum heterosexuals. These gun-toting anarchist trannies have been harassing their neighbors since 2019. As of January 2022, there are thirteen tranny ranchers, 200 alpacas, some chickens, and a couple depressed looking dogs. The idea of the Tenacious Unicorn Ranch is the woke journalist's wet dream. Thus, it is the subject of various fluff pieces depicting them as God's gift to animals. In reality, the alpacas are living in a tiny tin shed and have their fur sheared BEFORE winter, resulting in them freezing to death.

Raising alpacas for their fur is not a lucrative venture at all so these anti-government "anarchists" are living off tax deductions and money they raise on endless GoFundMe fundraisers. The Troon Squad has been unable to run a profitable business even after being handed $110,000 on a silver platter by antifa allies. It turns out ranching is a science and some bumbling troons can't just buy some land and guess how to raise livestock. The rancheros have no idea what they're doing so they pretend to be a non-profit to scam ignorant people so they can afford HRT.

When the ranchers aren't neglecting their livestock, they like to spend their time crying on Twitter about "Nazi Trump supporters" that "threaten them" and make up stories about a guy named Earl killing the alpacas. The troon squad protects itself from the mean right-wingers by calling them out on Facebook. Those fascists are surely shaking in their boots now!

The alpacas lovingly being left to freeze in the snow
The alpacas packed together with no room to lay down. Note the exposed insulation the alpacas have chewed on.

Jews disembark cattle car after arriving at Auschwitz-Birkenau footage (Enhanced and Colorized, 1943)

The desolate wasteland the alpacas live on. There isn't shit for them to eat.
These alpacas seem much happier grazing on grass rather than insulation.

Notable Ranchers

The Current Cast
Penelope Phillip Matthew Logue is the founder of the ranch and the leader of the troon goons who goes by Penny. He was ass-raped as a child (no surprise) and now copes by larping with other non-passing trannies at his ranch. Used to be in the Army and fathered two children, one of whom he tried to troon out at the tender age of 4. Phil acts like an Internet Tough Guy and has literally said "If you want to come shoot at me, shoot at me" but if anyone as much as comes close to his property, he becomes a professional victim.
Kathryn Kevin Gibes is Christian Weston Chandler on HRT and the fan favorite among Kiwi Farmers. He is Penny's BDSM slave that never does any physical work despite living on a ranch. Kevin generally spends his days rambling on Twitter about his neo-vagina and begging for money to his pay his bills while spending his stimulus checks on toys. He has admitted to only washing his hair every month and Kevin is also a furry because of course he is.
Salina Grey 40 year old who abandoned his wife and four kids to neglect alpacas and have degenerate BDSM sex with Kevin of all people.
Jen Jen AKA Micheal is a stunning and brave coprophile trans woman. His shit eating adventures were outted on SomethingAwful
Sky The battered (wife?) of Bonnie, an ex-rancher. Bonnie ran off with Kindness, a biological woman to obtain some grade-A, true and honest pussy instead of a rotting fleshhole.
Previous Members
Bonnie Bonnie, Deadname: Paul Alexander Mendoza, is a spic from Peru and co-owner of the ranch (under his mother's name of course). Like Penny, he also trooned out as a coping mechanism from childhood trauma due to being molested by his father. Bonnie is a huge misogynist despite being a trans-woman. He describes real women as "catty and too worried about aesthetics" which is Spanish for "not willing to indulge in the delusions of an ugly looking man dressed as a woman". Bonnie was married to a guy named Sky until he ran away with a batshit insane female to male troon named Kindness that he met at a furry convention. Loves to bitch about the government despite receiving disability buxx and food stamps from it. Pretends to have Multiple personality disorder like his girlfriend, Kindness.
Kindness Alyssa Jo Frauens is an absolute basketcase who collects rats. She was kicked off the ranch after being there for a week for having a massive meltdown when someone questioned her self-diagnosed multiple personality disorder. She is a female to male tranny dating male to female tranny Bonnie, a relationship so queer, it's straight. Alyssa is currently a professional dog-sitter while Bonnie leeches off of her. She even has her own Kiwi Farms thread!
October Evans So annoying, the other ranchers were told to "shoot on site" if spotted near the property.

Jonestown 2

Reverand Jim Jones Penny Logue's little compound has quite a few cult-like qualities to it. The criteria listed in ED's own Cult article is met to a T.

  • The leader demands lots of sex and/or money - Phil has 2 sex slaves that we know of
  • The leader and members get butthurt if you start asking too many questions - See what happens if you question the welfare of the alpacas freezing in the snow.
  • They try to convince you that everyone else is evil and out to get you - Those fascist right-wingers are out to get us!!1!!
  • They can't express their beliefs without using a ton of gibberish - The rancheros cry on social media more than they do actual ranching.
  • They try to shut down or destroy anyone who criticizes them or makes lulz at their expense - DO NOT ask how they can never manage to properly budget their money. You WILL be blocked on Twitter.
  • They threaten to permaban their enemies from IRL - One reason their neighbors don't like them is because they always threatening violence.
  • They permaban themselves from IRL - TBA.

They even have a scapegoat: heterosexuals

Supreme Leader Penny Logue

Gallery

See Also

  • Waco - Tranny Ruby Ridge when?????

External Links

The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch
is part of a series on
Bad things that happen to animals
Basic Concepts [-+]

Animal AbuseBestialityFurryHuntingTaxidermy

Meet the Menagerie:

BadgersBatsBearsBeesBirdsBunniesCalifornia Pet Laws 1/1/19CatsChickensChihuahuasCowsCrabsCrowsDinosaursDogsDucksEaglesFishFoxesFrogsGiant IsopodsOctopusesPandasParakeetsParrotsPenguinsPigsRatsSharksSheepSnakesSpidersTurtlesWalruseWolves

The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch is part of a series on

Homosexual Deviants

Visit the Faggotry Portal for complete coverage.

The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch is part of a series on

Social Justice

Visit the Social Justice Portal for complete coverage.

[Close them downOpen the records]
The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch is part of a series on Cults
UFO Cults: ScientologyGalactic Federation of LightHeaven's GateRaeliansNibiru
New-age Faggotry:

WiccaThe DolmenMooniesPaganismBlack AlchemyFagnosticismPrem RawatVoluntary Human Extinction MovementThothRon PaulRed Ice Creations

Raep cults: Al QaedaManiacs Murder CultManson FamilyMasonsSatanism
Jesus Cults: Ex-GayWestboro Baptist ChurchMormonismBranch DavidiansPeople's TempleChick Tracts
Wannabe Cults: SephyismSonic CulTVampiresGothsFurriesMulderiteWooksBroniesLibertariansFeminism
Stupid Cults: ScientologyAtheismSocial JusticeBreatharianMichelle Belanger/House KheperuSonic PassionHighgate Vampire, theThe Tenacious Unicorn Ranch
Troll Cults: AnonymousCult of the Dead CowRaptor JesusJohn SolomonChurch of the SubGeniusDiscordianism
Web 2.0 Cults: Atheist Scum UnitedKiwi FarmsKony 2012Rational Response SquadRationalWikiWikipediaWP:DAILYMAILYoung Tubers United