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[[image:Popeye Meat Market.gif|300px|right]]
'''Animals''' are the thing [[furries]] and [[PETA]] [[bestiality|drool]] over. Animals are best known for [[pissing]] and [[shitting]] everywhere and anywhere, whether it be the grass, the pool, or even on [[you|your]] bed. Many animals communicate with each other by sniffing each others piss, shit and assholes, and many other animals are known to regularly eat their own shit. Also, as to why the fuck PETA and other [[pussies|animal rights activists]] love animals so much, we have concluded this to be the result of sexual fetishes involving piss and shit. The flesh of animals are also [[OM NOM NOM NOM|delicious]] and have been consumed and sought after by [[Humans]] for our entire existence. Some humans abstain from eating meat, or even eggs and cheese, as they are infected with a severe brain disorder called [[Veganism]]. Hey, more food for us [[lie|normal people]]!


<big><i>For information on '''Animal Rights''', see [[ALF]].</i></big>
==Biology==
The first animal ever invented by [[God|Teh Lord]] was <del>Adam</del> your [[Your Mom|mom]]. After a couple of years, God realized he made a mistake, and transformed your mom into a [[nigger|Baboon]]. Thousands of generations later (6,000 years to be exact) Needless to say, he still failed, and that is why your mom is so ugly. Animals usually come with a mouth, [[ass]], and sometimes even [[tits]].
The only thing an animal can do is sleep, drink, eat, [[fuck]] and make the most irritating sounds known to [[Man|Man Kind]].  


[[Image:MuppetAnimalDrumscolor.gif|thumb|Animals are known to be skilled drummers.]]
[[Some argue|Scientists agree]] that life on earth developed through [[Evolution|Abiogenesis]], [[nobody cares|a process in which inert chemicals slowly developed properties that allowed complex interaction, and throughout millions, if not billions of years, eventually evolved into simple life forms. After another billion years, these life forms began to reach advanced stages, resulting in sea creatures. After a while, offshoots of said creatures started to walk on land.]] Eventually, humanoid species were around, killing each other off until only [[homo]]-sapiens survived.


'''Animals''' are the thing [[furries]] and [[PETA]] [[bestiality|drool]] over. These little insignificant creatures are always prone to shitting everywhere, not giving a fuck and making [[you|your]] life worse in every manner. [[Nobody cares|Nobody gives a shit]] about animals because they have no souls and are worthless piles of [[shit]]. Animals are also [[OM NOM NOM NOM|delicious]] and have always been thought of that way. What the [[vegan]]s are missing out on are the tasty morsels of animal flesh, [[fucktard|dumb fucks]].
This video sums it up;


==Biology==
<youtube>BL9S-TUikfg</youtube>
[[Image:furrygenderchange.jpg|thumb|Typical furry in action.]]
[[Image:SEXLama1.jpg|thumb|You'd hit it.]]


The first animal evolved when kiwis and peaches fucked each other [[last thursday]]. They produced the first furry animal, that later gave birth to [[you]].  
However, this is all bullshit. [[Creationism|The world is only 6,000 years old]] (Exactly) and has been that way [[LOLWUT|for eons]].  
Animals usually come with a mouth, [[ass]], and sometimes even [[tits]].
The main goal of all animals is to [[fuck]] as much as they can, so they can outnumber [[emo kids]].


==Furries==
==Furries==
According to [[Furries]] and [[4chan]], some things are alive and some things are [[Necrophilia|dead]].
[[Furries]] and [[4chan]] have come up with a revolutionary idea that there are some things which are alive and some things are [[Necrophilia|dead]].
 
The things which are alive are either Flora or Fauna. These are fancy names for Plants, Animals, Zombies (see: [[Republican]] Voters), and Humans. Some humans are actually [[Niggers]], an ancient humanoid race that is said to have evolved from chimps (but never lost the behavior, or Intelligence Quota of said chimps). If you disagree with this [[bullshit]], you are committing [[fursecution]] SO GO [[300|DINE IN HELL]].


The things which are alive are either Flora or Fauna or Humans. These are fancy names for Plants, Animals, Zombies, and Humans. Some humans are actually [[Niggers|animals in disguise]]. If you disagree with this [[bullshit]], you are committing [[fursecution]] SO GO [[300|DINE IN HELL]].
[[Truth|All furries try to have sex with animals]]. When they can't find an animal they want, they buy a [[plushie]], cut a hole in its crotch, and insert a [[fleshlight]]. This technique is called the [[strategically placed hole]].


[[Truth|All furries try to have sex with animals]]. When they can't find an animal they want, they make a [[doll]].
==Interactions with Humans==
[[Truth|All life exists to reproduce and manipulate the environment for resources necessary for said reproduction.]]  


==The Muppets==
Humanity has overcome near-extinction, [[high score|mass genocide]], starvation, [[AIDS|disease]], famine, [[Katy Perry]], [[Justin Bieber]], and other horrific tragedies for thousands of generations. We owe our survival to hunting, fighting and eating animals.


According to the Muppets, Animal was a drummer. "An-i-MAL!!!! Eat drums! Eat drums!"
[[truth|Humans are the only species on the planet with an IQ higher than that of a 5 year old]].


==Interactions with Humans==
Many edgy [[13 year olds]] like to say [[Pekka Auvinen|humanity is overrated]] and that we're all a bunch of useless fat retards, but this only applies to [[americans]], namely those who live in [[The South]]. Humanity is a killing machine, and we have brought to extinction many rival animals. You owe your very existence to your ancestors who pwn'd the living shit out of giant beasts. Be grateful that you don't have to fight and skin that animal you're eating; machines and underpaid workers did that for you, you privileged fuck.
Some people choose to make animals their pets. They do this because they are lonely, fat and ugly. They think that their pets understand them and don't judge them but they're really just their for the free food and shit. Others take their animal relationships a step too far.
 
Some humans are known to have a love for animals. These people are  [[fat]], [[ugly]], [[Forever Alone|have no friends]], and are just looking for something to own; [[You|You]] are one of them. Your pet cat wont defend you if some intruder breaks into your house. Your cat will probably feast off your corpse should you die, like what happened to [http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2391223/Janet-Veal-56-gnawed-eaten-CATS-kitchen-floor-died.html this lady].
 
== Headlines ==


Mother's [[furry]] shame as first genetic furry is exposed after 20 years of hiding.
The World Health Organization warn of transsexual repercussions from furplay (not to be confused with [[yiff]]).


Mothers secret shame leaves daughter disfigured. Doctors say she is beyond medical help and suggested that perhaps [[Disney]] (could help)/(have helped). [[Disney]] claim copyright infringement and [[pedophile|phile]] for damages claiming that this is just a smear campaign by the [[Fursecution|Fursecutionists]].  
Mothers secret shame leaves daughter disfigured. Doctors say she is beyond medical help and suggested that perhaps [[Disney]] (could help)/(have helped). [[Disney]] claim copyright infringement and [[pedophile|phile]] for damages claiming that this is just a smear campaign by the [[Fursecution|Fursecutionists]].  


The World Health Organization warn of transsexual repercussions from furplay (not to be confused with [[yiff]]).
Mother's [[furry]] shame as first genetic furry is exposed after 20 years of hiding.


[[Pedophile|Head of the ‘furrys on line’]]  asked that the furry hybrid be brought to [[Stickam]] where [[4chan]] members would treat her [[raep|good]], claiming that they will always stand by their manifesto of ‘TITS OR GTFO’ and bring the helpless happiness.
[[Pedophile|Head of the ‘furrys on line’]]  asked that the furry hybrid be brought to [[Stickam]] where [[4chan]] members would treat her [[raep|good]], claiming that they will always stand by their manifesto of ‘TITS OR GTFO’ and bring the helpless happiness.


==Videos==
<center>'''Typical animal behavior; also, typical [[furfag]] behavior.'''<br>
{{fv|Videos|background-color: white;|font-weight: bold;
|<youtube>kNak7H4Bizw</youtube>
|<youtube>1hPxGmTGarM</youtube>
|<youtube>aOybBv5Uk1o</youtube>
|<youtube>GhxqIITtTtU</youtube>
|<youtube>3DVR27dKuQY</youtube>
|<youtube>eUYeBaCoseE</youtube>
|<youtube>A2y_LEbdEVE</youtube>
|<youtube>JmjHialH__0</youtube>
|<youtube>jaHHF9clnjQ</youtube>
}}</center>
== Galleries ==
{{cg|Captions|furfles1|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Just_Some_Bunny.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Look_At_This_Fucking_Bird.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Nature_Nightmares.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Toast.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Bitches_Love_Leaves.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Fuck Derek.jpg
Image:Shit lion.jpg
Image:Frank fish.jpg
Image:Not HUNGRY hungry.jpg
Image:Truck spills its nuts.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Cardboard_Box_Reactions.png
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Curiosity.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Everything_You_Love.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Like_This.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Plays_Well_With_Children.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Say_It_To_My_Face_Bro.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Tonight...You.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Deer_-_Captions_-_Blanket.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Captions_-_Ask_My_Butt.jpg
Image:Asians_and_deer.jpg
Image:Stik.jpg
Image:Lobsterknifefight.jpg
Image:Battle_Ass.jpg
Image:Bitey.jpg
Image:Keke_Mouse.jpg
Image:Captions_-_Animals_-_Eucalyptus.jpg
Image:I need dis.jpg
Image:Stand_Amongst_The_Ashes.jpg
Image:SpartanSquirrel.jpg
Image:GiggityGiggitySquirrel.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Fauxpics_-_Squirrelantula.jpg
</gallery>}}<br>
{{cg|Gross|ewww|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Ass_Explosion.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Buffalo_Rape.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Penguin_Diarhea.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Rhino_Taking_A_Dump.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Squids_Revenge.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Tastes_Like_Chicken.jpg
Image:Giraffe.jpg
Image:Bird_Shit_Kid.jpg
Image:Turtle_and_a_toy_sex.jpg
Image:Loljapan.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Splatter_Zone.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Gross_-_Well_And_Truly_Fucked.jpg
</gallery>}}<br>
{{cg|Rodents|vermin|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Pope Squirrel.jpg
Image:Squirrel Powerline.jpg
Image:Squirrel.jpg
Image:Squirrel banjoe.jpg
Image:Squirrel nuts.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:41079230 blacksquirrel203.jpg
Image:Chipmunk_Blunt.jpg
Image:Hamster_Fighting_Machine.jpg
Image:Corn Chipmunk.jpg
Image:Sooty.PNG
</gallery>}}<br>


==Animal Behavior==
{{cg|Aquatic|water|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Typical homogay animal behavior. Also typical [[furry]] behavior.
Image:Octopus_Shaving.jpg
Image:Dot fish.gif
Image:Shark and fish.gif
Image:Walrus.gif
Image:Giant Isopod bottom.gif
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>}}<br>


<center><youtube>eUYeBaCoseE</youtube></center>
{{cg|Avian|air|center|<gallery perrow="5">
<center><youtube>A2y_LEbdEVE</youtube></center>
Image:Duck_Fly.jpg
<center><youtube>JmjHialH__0</youtube></center>
Image:Ducklings_Nooo.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>}}<br>
 
{{cg|Reptiles|scales|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Animals_-_Lizards_-_01.jpg
Image:LOOK_AT_THIS_FUCKING_LIZARD.jpg
Image:LOOK_AT_THIS_FUCKING_LIZARD_part_2.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
</gallery>}}<br>
 
{{cg|General|land|center|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Goat-dies-lol.gif
Image:Goat jump.gif
Image:Surprised Red Panda.gif
Image:Animals_-_Om_Nom_Nom.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Koalas_-_Fun_And_Games.jpg
</gallery>|<gallery perrow="5">
Image:Monkey riding goat.gif
Image:Koala.gif
Image:Beaver throws hatchet.gif
Image:Beaver Seducing a Platypus.jpg
Image:Goat accused of robbery.jpg
Image:SEXLama1.jpg|You'd hit it.
Image:Holy_Cow.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Deer_-_01.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Deer_-_02.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Deer_-_03.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Deer_-_04.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Foxes_-_01.jpg
Image:Animals_-_Foxes_-_Stupid_Fox.jpg
Image:Kangaroo.PNG
Image:Animals_-_Fauxpics_-_Gangsta_Chimp.jpg
Image:Caterpillars.jpg
</gallery>}}<br>


==List of Famous Animals==
==List of Famous Animals==
* [[PETA]]
* [[ALF]]
* [[ALF]]
* [[Furries]]
* [[Furries]]
* [[Cyberpets]] Can't be bothered with a real animal?
* [[Bestiality]]
* [[I Hate Horses|Horses]]
* [[Mr. Hands]]
* [[Mr. Hands]]
* [[Scared Monkey]]
* [[Scared Monkey]]
* [[Dogs]]
* [[Lolcats]]
* [[Shay]]
* [[Shay]]
* [[Theferrett]]
* The [[Lolrus]]
* The [[Lolrus]]
* Most [[rapper]]s
* [[Wolfaboo]]s
* [[Wolfaboo]]s
* [[Adalia Rose]]
==See Also==
* [[Nigger|Apes]]
* [[Badger|Badgers]]
* [[Bears]]
* [[Chikins]]
* [[Cyberpets]] - Can't be bothered with a real animal?
* [[Dinosaur]]
* [[Dinosexx0r]]
* [[Dogs]]
* [[Fox|Foxes]]
* [[Hamster|Hamsters]]
* [[Horses]]
* [[Koko The Gorilla]]
* [[Lolcats]]
* [[My Little Pony|Ponies]]
* [[Rabbit]]s
* [[Rats]]
* [[Wolves]]


{{foods}}
{{foods}}
 
{{Animals}}
{{furfaggotry}}
[[Category:Furries]]
[[Category:Furries]]
[[Category:Articles That Should Be Categories]]

Latest revision as of 21:35, 23 June 2018

Animals are the thing furries and PETA drool over. Animals are best known for pissing and shitting everywhere and anywhere, whether it be the grass, the pool, or even on your bed. Many animals communicate with each other by sniffing each others piss, shit and assholes, and many other animals are known to regularly eat their own shit. Also, as to why the fuck PETA and other animal rights activists love animals so much, we have concluded this to be the result of sexual fetishes involving piss and shit. The flesh of animals are also delicious and have been consumed and sought after by Humans for our entire existence. Some humans abstain from eating meat, or even eggs and cheese, as they are infected with a severe brain disorder called Veganism. Hey, more food for us normal people!

Biology

The first animal ever invented by Teh Lord was Adam your mom. After a couple of years, God realized he made a mistake, and transformed your mom into a Baboon. Thousands of generations later (6,000 years to be exact) Needless to say, he still failed, and that is why your mom is so ugly. Animals usually come with a mouth, ass, and sometimes even tits. The only thing an animal can do is sleep, drink, eat, fuck and make the most irritating sounds known to Man Kind.

Scientists agree that life on earth developed through Abiogenesis, a process in which inert chemicals slowly developed properties that allowed complex interaction, and throughout millions, if not billions of years, eventually evolved into simple life forms. After another billion years, these life forms began to reach advanced stages, resulting in sea creatures. After a while, offshoots of said creatures started to walk on land. Eventually, humanoid species were around, killing each other off until only homo-sapiens survived.

This video sums it up;

Load video
YouTube

However, this is all bullshit. The world is only 6,000 years old (Exactly) and has been that way for eons.

Furries

Furries and 4chan have come up with a revolutionary idea that there are some things which are alive and some things are dead.

The things which are alive are either Flora or Fauna. These are fancy names for Plants, Animals, Zombies (see: Republican Voters), and Humans. Some humans are actually Niggers, an ancient humanoid race that is said to have evolved from chimps (but never lost the behavior, or Intelligence Quota of said chimps). If you disagree with this bullshit, you are committing fursecution SO GO DINE IN HELL.

All furries try to have sex with animals. When they can't find an animal they want, they buy a plushie, cut a hole in its crotch, and insert a fleshlight. This technique is called the strategically placed hole.

Interactions with Humans

All life exists to reproduce and manipulate the environment for resources necessary for said reproduction.

Humanity has overcome near-extinction, mass genocide, starvation, disease, famine, Katy Perry, Justin Bieber, and other horrific tragedies for thousands of generations. We owe our survival to hunting, fighting and eating animals.

Humans are the only species on the planet with an IQ higher than that of a 5 year old.

Many edgy 13 year olds like to say humanity is overrated and that we're all a bunch of useless fat retards, but this only applies to americans, namely those who live in The South. Humanity is a killing machine, and we have brought to extinction many rival animals. You owe your very existence to your ancestors who pwn'd the living shit out of giant beasts. Be grateful that you don't have to fight and skin that animal you're eating; machines and underpaid workers did that for you, you privileged fuck.

Some humans are known to have a love for animals. These people are fat, ugly, have no friends, and are just looking for something to own; You are one of them. Your pet cat wont defend you if some intruder breaks into your house. Your cat will probably feast off your corpse should you die, like what happened to this lady.

Headlines

The World Health Organization warn of transsexual repercussions from furplay (not to be confused with yiff).

Mothers secret shame leaves daughter disfigured. Doctors say she is beyond medical help and suggested that perhaps Disney (could help)/(have helped). Disney claim copyright infringement and phile for damages claiming that this is just a smear campaign by the Fursecutionists.

Mother's furry shame as first genetic furry is exposed after 20 years of hiding.

Head of the ‘furrys on line’ asked that the furry hybrid be brought to Stickam where 4chan members would treat her good, claiming that they will always stand by their manifesto of ‘TITS OR GTFO’ and bring the helpless happiness.

Videos

Typical animal behavior; also, typical furfag behavior.
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube
Load video
YouTube

Previous Video | Next Video


Galleries

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  • You'd hit it.
    You'd hit it.


List of Famous Animals

See Also


 Animal
is part of a series on
Food and Drink

[BleurghOm Nom Nom]
Animal
is part of a series on
Bad things that happen to animals
Basic Concepts [-+]

Animal Abuse • Bestiality • Furry • Hunting • Taxidermy

Meet the Menagerie:

Badgers • Bats • Bears • Bees • Birds • Bunnies • California Pet Laws 1/1/19 • Cats • Chickens • Chihuahuas • Cows • Crabs • Crows • Dinosaurs • Dogs • Ducks • Eagles • Fish • Foxes • Frogs • Giant Isopods • Octopuses • Pandas • Parakeets • Parrots • Penguins • Pigs • Rats • Sharks • Sheep • Snakes • Spiders • Turtles • Walruse • Wolves

Animal is part of a series on

Furfaggotry

Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.

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