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Video Game Reviewers

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THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ.
BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM.
With enough practice, maybe even You can aspire to be as cool as these reviewers.
...Maybe even this cool!
What a video game reviewer believes how cool they look while reviewing a game.
What a video gamer reviewer actually looks like while reviewing a game.

Because there are many video games out there, such as Pikmin, Mario, and Animal Crossing, some fucktards decided that writing and complaining about them was a good idea. So, video game reviewers were born. Of course, everybody decided to do it. Some where in it for the Jew gold. Others did it for the e-fame, but none bothered being original or in other regards use their brain, making it unfunny.

Professional video game reviews should not be seen as reviews but secret advertisements in magazines like Game Informer, Nintendo Power, or on official websites like IGN and GameSpot.

Amateur reviews show up on sites like GameFAQs, and even IGN and GameSpot. Such video games reviews traditionally tend to be either praising everything about the game and giving it 10s all around, or trying to rationalize for themselves that a game sucks, and not that they made a wrong purchase. Basically these "reviewers" don't know what a review is. That is, an investigation to the reader whether he would be interested in a particular product.

A new genre of MST3K-esque video game reviews became industry mainstream with Seanbaby and the Angry Video Game Nerd. These reviews are exclusively negative in which the player simply review bad games to make the watcher laugh. There is also a popular trend of making retrospective videos, but most of them suck because they don't know what they want to say.

How to identify a video game reviewer on YouTube

Identifying one of these "reviewers" on YouTube is an unbelievably simple task that even a man of epic fail can identify with ease. Look for these signs in an acquaintance or relative, even you yourself, to identify them as this type of YouTube failure:

  • You never excel at anything except being a beta male.
  • You get bullied frequently, even by the losers at school.
  • You have no life.
  • You are asking for it.
  • You fancy yourself a comedic genius which fell from the sky.
  • You play nothing but old video games.
  • You play your old video games on an emulator.
  • You listen to DragonForce.
  • You have a collection of games and systems that rivals the book selection of the Richard Nixon Presidential Library.
  • You quote unfunny sitcoms and shit out memes for great justice.
  • You are a basement dweller.
  • You are a furry.
  • You have an account on DeviantArt.
  • You hold Saturday morning cartoons as the holy grail of the visual medium.
  • You would like to crawl back to your mother's pussy, but settle with trying to relive your childhood.
  • You enjoy bashing normal hobbies.
  • You have Windows Movie Maker and love it.
  • You like to go and fight e-wars for someone you don't even know.
  • You have pent-up rage and have no other medium to unleash it.
  • You bitch about how YouTube doesn't respect most game reviewers on their site.
  • YOU NEVER BOTHER PLAYING THROUGH THE GAMES YOU INTEND TO REVIEW, but you still fancy yourself as a savior of mankind by doing ten-minute speedruns of old games.

How to become a video game reviewer on YouTube

A cool dude.

If you or a relative identify with at least one of the traits above, then video game reviewing is just for you! Follow these easy steps to becoming one, and you too will claim thousands of subscribers as your own.

Step One: Brainstorming

The first step is, obviously, to find your reviewing niche in this burgeoning movement. Old or new games? Sega or Nintendo? AVGN or Irate Gamer clone? Screaming banshee or socially aloof awkwardness? Unfunny or unfunny? The choices can be daunting and at times stressful, but this process should take you no more than five minutes to figure out, as reviews on YouTube aren't about the pre-production process.

The next logical step would be to name yourself as an original and innovative reviewer. If you have trouble with this step, this tool can help you out.

Step Two: The Tools

After you have figured out your course of action to conquer YouTube, you need to conjure the necessary tools in order to contribute to this movement. To review, you will need:

  • An emulator of your system of choice (or, if you are indeed a l33t gamer, buy a GameBridge, connect it to your system of choice and your computer, and boast about owning such a readily available game system to the Internet).
  • A capturing device for the emulator. Even if you can't afford a gaming system or GameBridge, don't fear. Improvise with CamStudio, Unregistered Hypercam 2 or, if you don't feel like getting viruses on your run-of-the-mill Dell computer, just point your webcam at a portion of the computer screen. Remember, visual quality is not mandatory for reviewing.
  • A microphone. Use a Radio Shack headset to emphasize the tinniness and awkward sound of your voice. Audio quality is also not important to reviewing games, either, so be sure to scream your voice box to death to gain the appreciation of YouTube.
If you can't afford a microphone, just use a text-to-speech mechanism or text via Windows Movie Maker to get your message across.
  • An editor. Don't get into a panic about this, for every computer comes with either Windows Movie Maker or iMovie. No, you're not going to be doing any actual editing to cut out moments of stuttering, dead air or any other douchebaggery that comes out of your mouth. It would ruin the message you are trying to convey to the 'Tubes.
  • A YouTube account. Pretty straightforward. Choose a hip and edgy name to become the envy of the Internet in no time.

Step Three: Production

No, this isn't hard at all. all you have to do is this.

  • Record the gameplay from the emulator while recording your vocals at the same time. One key word of advice in this regard is to never script your reviews. The only people who do this are sellouts who are in league with the evil of mainstream reviewing sites, and believe in production quality and keeping their viewers interested in the product.
Only with a massive recording glitch should you ever think about re-recording your review. This helps to make the review more organic and honest.
  • Import and export video out of Windows Movie Maker. An optional task; only if you wish to add text, combine vocals and video or, if you are daring, do a few minor edits to the video. YouTube has an option to upload webcam recordings straight to the site, so if this is the case, go straight to step four.
  • Upload video to YouTube. Make sure to add keywords that are popular web hits but serve absolutely no purpose to identifying your video in order to maximize video and page views.

With these steps completed, you will have created a visual masterpiece that rivals such first-grade works of art such as these:

Please note that all of these videos are quite popular despite the fact that they are the equivalent of mass genocide. So even if your videos suck complete ass, users on the site will still love you. A common misconception is that you have to be talented to be popular on YouTube, but as many popular YouTube personalities and vloggers can tell you, talent is an unneeded ingredient for YouTube popularity. Sure, there will be haters, but they will be driven away by wave after wave of your future fanboys.

Step Four: ????

Step Five: PROFIT!

Congratulations! You have officially become a great reviewer on YouTube in league with the great champions such as those below. Feast on delicious foods, O glorious one, for you are now the splooge of Google's assbirth.

Forgettable reviewers (Moar than 5,000 subs)

Forgettable reviewers: The Z-list e-celebs of YouTube. Either by sucking the dicks of the retro gaming clique or by freak luck, these douche-bags have managed to amass over 5,000 YouTube subscriptions. Please take a good look at these abominations. It's imperative their crimes against good taste and decency do not go unnoticed. They must be stopped.

The Angry Video Game Nerd

The Angry Video Game Nerd

Previously known as the Angry Nintendo Nerd, the Angry Video Game Nerd, James Rolfe or AVGN, arguably started the whole video game reviewer fad (though ironically he ripped-off Seanbaby) and is probably the most known of them all. However, he is now the Internet's equivalent of The Simpsons (and you could also use that phrase for Nostalgia Critic), this meaning that he stopped being funny several years ago and seriously needs to fuck off. The AVGN pretends to suck at games and then throws them out a window and/or does something unfunny. More known characteristics include a shitty theme song, cussing, drinking beer and references to animal poop. James has also gone a bit mild in recent times due to him solely reviewing games of movie tie-ins & occasionally looking for places used as movie locations, which mostly involve the Rocky movies, like dat bridge Sly jogged through in one scene of Rocky II that James had found out of sheer coincidence. The Nerd sold out big time when he started auctioning off shit featured in his videos on eBay. These worthless items, including signed, broken NES carts, were lapped up for stupid money by his douchebag fanboys.

The Nerd is also known for his limited vocabulary, including many classic quotes such as:

 
 
What a shitload of fuck! ... Cowafucking piece of dog shit! ... Fuck this shit! ... Fuck! ... Shit! ... AASSS! ... FUUUCK! ... Damn! ... It sucking fucks, it fucking sucks, it's a piece of shit! And I don't like it. ... Shit the FUCK! ... ROBOFUCKAZOID PIECE OF SHIT!!
 

 

—James Rofle, marveling us with his true passion full of witty & timeless references to vidya games.


And pretty much every other swear word in the dictionary. All of which have since been stolen by other video game reviewers to the point that they're now cliché and completely lost all meaning because just saying fuck shit shit the fuck ass fuck this shit ass motherfucking game over and over in front of a webcam takes so much effort.

Aqualunggamereviews

AqualunggameReviews

Aqualunggamereviews (IRL Ken Blakey), is a Massachusetts stoner who does review/walkthroughs on old video games, mostly NES. Aqualung also occasionally does Atari 2600 reviews, too. He was inspired by the Angry Nerd, imagine that? However, unlike the nerd, this guy seems to be good at video games, but not so good that he appears to be a basement dweller. He uses save states, which according to Ken proves he's not a virgin. He doesn't show his face, but there do exist photos of him, although rare to find. At least that means he is not full of himself like other faggots on here. He also does not curse so often that it ruins the review.

As mentioned, Aqualung is a stoner. This is proven by his mellow, emotionless voice. He is not a hippy, even though he has the hair. No hippy would play games with war and violence. Overall, Mr. Blakey beats vidya games, kills 8-bit bad guise, and doesn't afraid of anything. In fact, he's so awesome the AVGN has to choose games he reviews to get ideas (did Kid Kool less than two months after Aqualung). And, despite all that, he's only got 10,000 subs as opposed to AVGN or Irate Gamer's near half a million. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS GODDAMN WORLD!?!?!


Armake21 / Marc0

Armake21
Armake21's most successful video.

Umberto LaForge, (adopted name: Marcus Sparacio), also known as NicotineAlien and BoxedEntertainment21 for a short while before getting his ass b& (and now Waste0Time), Armake21 Marco (he claims Armake is just a character he was playing) is an overrated, slap-headed, virgin game reviewer who can't review for shit. He just attempts to swear at them for ten minutes in his wispy Winnie the Pooh voice. Does this sound familiar? Armake21's most recognizable feature is his uncanny talent of growing hair on the wrong side of his head.

Fagboys got butthurt when Armake21's account was mysteriously closed, and all videos were removed. It has been confirmed that his account has been closed by himself in an emo sympathy vote.

His new account, TheWaste0Time, still contains the same three-year-old reviews and constant empty threats of never doing any more reviews (in his favorite flavor: white text in an Impact font on a black background). Fanbois now wait for re-uploads of his awesome game reviews so they can go back to jerking off to his older works instead of choking on Armake's cock.

Try this lulzy experiment at home:

1. Comment on Armake fan pages that the Irate Gamer is a far superior to him.
2. Laugh at him because his real name is Umberto LaForge.
3. Get reaction
4. ?????
5. PROFIT

Asalieri

Moar info: Asalieri.

META Fatass deciding that the camera angle with the good shot of his tits would be a great idea.

Eric Gaede aka META Fatass is a pseudointellectual YouTube nobody who after viewing Encyclopedia Dramatica for the first time, decided to make a series called "Reviewing a Reviewer" which is META AS FUCK, but it's just a shittier version of Retsupurae, where he hides behind forced intellectual humor to mask his overall contempt of the world and how his life went to shit. He has also admitted that he is a brony...so yeah, pretty much speaks for itself.

"I'm just a regular video game fan, here to provide insight on what it's like to be a real gamer. I am absolutely sick of the billions of idiot reviewers who collectively push the general image of gaming back a few decades by showing the world we're apparently nothing but brainless idiots. In my series "Reviewing A Reviewer" you'll see several Videogame (and who knows, perhaps other media) reviewers get reviewed and you can see for yourself how bad they're all making us look. So pull up a chair, and if you can deal with my limited Microsoft Paint skills and shit quality audio, let's explore the world of incompetent reviewers together."

BREAKING NEWS: Due to a combination of butthurt, unwarranted self-importance and an e-lawyer who claims to be from Puerto Rico, Asalieri's page has been taken down. We'll update you as soon as anything comes up, but feel free to browse through the page's history since Asalieri thinks that deleting a page also means erasing the archives. IT'S BACK!

Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw

Ben "Yahtzee" Croshaw

Although not the same kind of game reviewer as the above, he still deserves a mention for being such a (as other Britfags would call him) Southern twat.

Basically, take your most pompous and egotistical Britfag, make a bunch of Microsoft Paint slides, have him talk over them, speed up the audio, and you have instant comedy gold. Think the Angry Video Game Nerd, except with a few less brain cells, no access to a video camera, and reviewing new games instead of old ones. He used to review fairly poor games, but now has taken it upon himself to troll the easily upset fanboys of overhyped games such as Halo 3, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, and Metal Gear Solid 4. He has also called out Tim Buckley on occasion (like anybody has not done that before) for his faggotry. /v/ has a love/hate relationship with him, and the board will often be split if he reviews a game they like (or used to like after watching his review on it because they can be easily lead).

Yahtzee's latest venture is a car crash of a TV pilot by the name of GameDamage. A show that couldn't be more tragic than if it consisted of the Taliban flying Princess Diana's funeral procession escorted by a bus full of blind orphans into the World Trade Center on 9/11.

BlackBusterCritic

Nice suit, nigga.

Powerword: Jamin Williams

BlackBusterCritic (BBC for short) is a nigger that is a /v/ oldfag, that critiques on how gaming companies are screwing gamers over and how PC gaming is superior to console gaming, presenting mainly facts in such videos much to the ire of fanboys everywhere. Which is why BBC is hailed by /v/ as like The Boss Nigger of Gaming. That being said, he has been known to review a few games in the past, usually Sonic related ones, mainly due to the fact that he makes videos where he makes fun of Sonicfags.

Like every nigga who isn't jobless, he is obsessed with the fact that he has a job and points that out every time he can. Because as we all know, aside from Obama, who defrauded the elections, it's actually a miracle for a nigga to have a job.

He also gets into a lot of Internet debates with various cancer of YouTube and "owns" the shit out of them, such as LiaT. Because his debates get a lot of people buttmad and have his fans creaming in their pants, a lot of his content was lost due to his main YouTube channel disappearing due to promoting violence, and strangely this shortly happened after he owned Hellsing920 in an Internet debate, and it happened while he was busy sucking dicks at boot camp. He soon returned on YouTube as BlackBusterTV, which was recently taken down for community guideline violations.

Caddicarus

I want to be a witty and British JonTron!!!

Caddicarus, AKA The UK Jontron (Unfunny Knockoff of Jontron) and The Only Person in Existence Who Hates Super Smash Bros. But Jizzes Himself Over PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale is a Sony fanboy (Like most people from the UK) and tries too hard to be like his idols. He started out trying to audition for Normal Boots (So he could get really close to his idols) but due to his creepy ass UK nature, he was rejected. So, after Normal Boots was BALEETED, he then went with an alternative, Hidden Block. There, and on his YouTube channel, he continues to talk about how "Special" he is on how he never grew up with Nintendo and instead liked to bend over for Sony and Await Greatness. Ironically, he is the only one on the Hidden Block to get a hard on for Sony, as the rest of the people on the site have one for Nintendo. Goes to show you how out of place he is in this world. Caddicarus' reviews are known as "slaughter or salvage" in which he throws temper tantrums when he is shitty at a hard game, blaming the game for his apparent lack of skill and negligence. Caddi demands that every game he plays cater to him and his own interests, raging all over the place when they don't. This is especially true when the game is for the PlayStation, because Caddicarus believes that the PlayStation was made solely for him and fuck all if there's a single game in its library that he sucks at.

Classic Game Room / InecomCompany

Classic Game Room,
Mark Bussler (Left)
& The other one (right)

Long before all these shitty reviewers on YouTube, Long before the AVGN and even long before Seanbaby, There was Classic Game Room (or Game Room as they were back then). An Internet video game video review show from the mid 90's that no-one watched due to a combination of no-one having the Internet back then and even if you did, you wouldn't wait three hours to stream a three-minute video of someone making fun of Dreamcast games would you?

But with the advent of YouTube, the Game Room team decided to resurrect their 90's show to a new generation ALA NavGtr, only slightly less bat shit insane.

Unfortunately, their original series is pretty funny. However, since the advent of "Classic" Game Room, and one of the original members deciding to do something worthwhile with his life, all its notability went out of the window. Anyone who subscribes to them at this point is bombarded with a million fucking reviews each day, and when Bussler isn't reviewing a hundred games an hour, he's either making videos about his freakish mongrel of a dog or pouring beer from a first person perspective all while slapping adverts left, right and center on his videos like a typical YouTube Partner whore. He's well-known for his boring basement dweller-like tone, and countless array of terrible reviews. Anything that's too easy for a savant is considered garbage to him.

Although totally devoid of e-drama (aside from Still Gaming Lee's constant dick suckery), they're worthy of mentioning here for their sheer bombardment of videos, which they put up faster than a 10-year-old Let's Player.

With Mark's initial success, he moved to a small public storage location and hired a full time crew to review games and edit videos so he didn't have to. Then in time, he moved into a large warehouse as a cost cutting measure. Several years later, the ring on his finger disappeared and it was apparent his wife's full time job had been paying for his squandered life. Without her paying for things, it became clear that Mark was trying to cut costs even more, by purchasing expensive hybrid cars to save on gas (Hybrid car review) and using solar power for his bank of always on arcade machines in the background (solar powered Sega Genesis).

When his cost cutting measures didn't stop the bleeding, he announced that he'd be quitting the video show business. There just wasn't money in it, because any idiot with a camera could do what he had done for a decade. An idiot with a camera wouldn't spend money on a warehouse, either. He would also rant about Youtube having ads, despite he himself having dozens of ads per video.

The writing was on the wall as Mark tried to get a comic book writing career going. He Kickstarted a few comic books (shitty comics), which lead to dozens of ads filling the start and end of his spam like videos that talked more about Jar-Jar Binx than the games he was reviewing. Realizing his audience didn't give a shit about his comics, he began to review better comic books to anger his fans even more. Reviewing a comic took a few minutes of page flipping with a camera instead of having to play a game.

Once he quit, he started a Patreon to continue and in the first half year he was making $10,000 a month, but that wasn't enough for him. He fired his staff and let the warehouse go and now does the show from his basement bar like any alcoholic just divorced. Mark was making over $100,000 a year, but he continued his greed by having a few Patreons for various projects. This caused a backlash and his cash cow deflated (Mark's cow is dying). Like a lot of Youtubers, Patreon and 3 - 5 minutes of Patreon thank yous for a 3 minute video riddled with ads has ruined his show.

To get even more money, Mark took his show over to Amazon Prime hoping to sucker in a new audience of people that somehow don't know about Youtube. He's currently using his YouTube channel for drawing tutorials, because that's gonna totally get your old audience back. He also disabled comments on his newer videos to avoid having to deal with the backlash. Of course, that's what his old videos are for.

File:It ages badly..jpg
You're too old, fat man.
  • InecomCompany – Classic Game Room / InecomCompany's YouTube channel.

Cuck Master David Chauncey Clothier / DFW Retro Fest

Originator of the Texas Retro Gamers Society on Facebook, and Retro Gamers Society as a whole, and sometimes commentator on what games he feels are "not trash" on the youtubes. He considers himself a major gaming personality in the state of Texas and on the internetz. He's hosted one failed convention in the River Oaks Church Of The Nazarene, in River Oaks, Texas, and uses the memory of it to prop up his own ego. He uses other conventions as his personal shakedown tool of the local gaymers. In between all this "charity work" he does for the local gaymers, he browses Craigslist for local guys he can toss....err I mean games he can flip at his two resell booths at flea markets so he can peddle his warez at 300 percent markups. He then uses his Facebook group to post selfies of his latest buys to try to boost his already extremely inflated ego.

If anyone comments that they dont really care about what his latest buy is, he goes into a giant rant of how much more money he makes then you, and how he is married and rents a Lexus, and in general states how much more successful he is then you are. Often his post will contain the usual misspelling and grammar displayed by the typical 11 year old. Easily baited into having a meltdown, when he finds he has lost whatever argument he got himself into, he always resorts to "I'm better then you, because I have a Lexus and I'm married and successful!". If success was measured by the weight of his "trophy" wife, then yeah, sure, he is pretty successful indeed (shes pretty fucking fat, you can check his FB profile for fatty pics).


Scrapping the bottom of the barrel for entertainment? If so you cunts can visit his Facebook page as well. Or his DFW Facebook page. Or hell, be extra generous, visit his shitty youtube channel. Bonus channel for extra fail effect.

Gamester81

Gamester81

A typical "I'm Mr Nice Guy," gut-wrenching, YouTube douchebag. This guy boasts a massive collection of retro hardware, which if it weren’t for his smugness, might be interesting to look at. Gamester81 is one of those guys that gives shout-outs, but then likes to blow himself after for being so "nice". After all, it's about the "community" maaan. His douchebaggery recently reached new heights when he started giving interviews (who the fuck made him Larry King anyway?) and holding suspiciously-timed prize giveaways that just happen to coincide with his Partnership application... funny how that works. Not content with one wack channel, Gamester81 has two others which he constantly whores out. I tell you, watching this guy's huge Shrek-style head fill the screen, combined with his smugness, is enough to put anyone off YouTube for life. Consider yourselves warned. This guy has a big dose of butthurt coming his way.

Update: Gamester81 had mentioned that he was applying for a YouTube Partnership, solely so he could break the 10-minute time limit, he said at the time. He's now a full Partner, and guess what, people? None of his videos are longer (but the ads look pretty) - funny that... and he said it wasn't about the money. So he blatantly lied to his viewers then? I urge you, stop kissing his ass (I know that may be a difficult proposition for you YouTube fanboys), go to this guy's channel and troll the fuck out of him at your earliest convenience.

This guy is a master at self promotion, and as is typical of YouTube Partner whores (yes, I'm referring to his fucking ass-buddies at All Gen Gamers), only cares about his lame YT-Celeb status and getting a fucking check off his Google pimp daddy. Now his obviously cynical motives for starting his channel(s) are paying off for him. Read between the lines with this guy, and you'll see behind the mask.

In the All Gen Gamers podcast, he is often asked to read things aloud for the other hosts, resulting in a blubbering mess of verbal incompetency. He also has a habit of starting every other sentence with "to be honest with you" and ending them with "for sure, for sure." The times he doesn't use his little catch-phrases, Gamester81 is stuttering or tripping over his words.

For reasons no one knows, Gamester81 decided to start filming his YouTube videos in 3D, not realizing that nobody wants to see his fugly face popping out at them. Even if you somehow manage to find red and blue 3D glasses, these videos will still look like utter shit. Fortunately for Gamester, his legion of cocksuckers will never tell him that he's done something shitty. Oh no, because then he won't like them, and if this ugly-ass pedo that they've never met in real life thinks negatively of them, the fanboys' pathetic self-esteem will be shattered.

Warning: If you happen to have a YouTube channel related to gaming, one that's reasonably successful, there's a good chance this fucker will turn up on your doorstep for a "let's team-up" video. Believe me, this dude will travel the globe to ponce a few extra subs.

Gamester81 also aligns himself with projects that turn out to be fake, money making scams or idiots with money that turn out to be scammed such as the the Coleco Chameleon (Chameleon disappears). This caused a lot of drama as Internet know it alls like to pile on and pick sides. In this case it was Pat the NES Punk spearheading it as some sort of Retroware TV payback from years prior.

On a side note, this guy is one fugly bastard too, and watching his fat sausage-like fingers fumbling over beautiful retro systems makes you feel kind of bad for the consoles.

TheGamingGoose

TheGamingGoose

The Gaming Goose is a hard reviewer to explain, he's best described as a mass of blubber and beard all wrapped up in a T-shirt that reviews NES games and cheap-o PS2 shit he finds in bargain bins.

He often talks about male penetrative sex in his reviews, but then moved onto making "Let's Plays", (which ironically, is even more fucking gay), Luckily, he has since come to his senses and has emerged as a legitimate troll of the video game community. His constant parodies of many reviewers has generated marginal amounts of lulz out of the situation, most notably when he recently attacked Armake21's arrogant, self-obsessed tl;dr comments on an, ironically, tl;dw video.

He is one of the more tolerable persons on this list, but that's like comparing smallpox to consumption.

Haedox

Haedox's avatar.

Haedox is a painfully unfunny Nintendo fan, who only started posting video game review videos in late 2014, because Lord knows we did not have a supersaturation of these fags infesting YouTube already.

There is sadly not a whole lot to say about Haedox, as he's one of the most banal of this species you'll find. His videos contain few sketches, visual gags or really anything to keep the viewer invested. They're mostly just the same looping gameplay footage being repeated ad nauseam, with Haedox's monotone voice orating about why the game sucks or not. Haedox fishes for views with contrarian opinions, like making videos about why popular titles such as Splatoon and Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door suck, but Metroid Prime: Federation Force is good (even going so far as to declare it the most underappreciated video game of 2016). It should be noted that while Haedox has shown his face, he generally chooses to represent himself with the same inanimate, DeviantArt-tier cartoon avatar in all his videos.

How this stupendously boring Jew got a five-digit number of YouTube subscribers is anyone's guess.

Happy Console Gamer

His bandanna (not shown) has been arrested for crimes against humanity.

Another "I'm Mr. Nice Guy" on the Internet, who is a total piece of shit behind closed doors. Starting out in April 2008, Happy Console Gamer is a Canadian game reviewer who makes videos which include fucking a plush whale in the bed, and having his girlfriend strip on scene. He loves to be a big Mr. Nice Guy and give random shout-outs to YouTube users with only four subscribers at the most. "RobMan" is his buttbuddy on the show, who's usually with him only to try and show that HCG is not a typical gaming virgin with no friends.

He hosted a segment on All Gen Gamers known as "Love Talk" in which he gives shitty advice that usually involves either whale-fucking or ass-rape. Johnny "Millenium" (totally his real name, you guys) often brags about having had "over 100" girlfriends, seemingly oblivious that this implies he is terrible at maintaining relationships.

Recently Johnny decided to set up a new "best friends" club in the guise of the website "Final Bosses", alongside fellow backstabbers such as Pat The NES Punk, Mike Matei and The Game Chasers. In doing so, he was more than happy to fuck over his childhood friend Rob Man, because as they didn't want his bald ass on the site. However, after a huge fanboy backlash, he reluctantly pulled him back aboard, while desperately trying to make it look like a "yeah, I've just been busy guise, we're still friends" scenario.

File:Potato review.jpg
After circling back to covering the NeoGeo for the twentieth time, he finally ran out of material to talk about. Fucking took long enough..


Hellsing920

Hellsing920,
a.k.a. the lead singer of 90's pop band Blues Traveler.

The twin brother of Sean Fausz who possesses an ego the size of Texas and weighs more than PissedOffVideoGamer, Hellsing920 (Powerword: Emerson Prevost) started his Internet career writing unintelligent and painfully unfunny wrestling articles for ObsessedWithWrestling.com (now called OnlineWorldofWrestling.com) before deciding to make a name for himself on YouTube. Hellsing was around for not even all of 2007 until he got banned for copyright infringement for comparing himself to Peter Griffin. He then sought refuge at LiveVideo, where he considered it productive for a new game review to be released every six months. This shouldn't be a surprise since being lazy has always been Hellsing's cup of tea (read below).

Returning to evil ol' YouTube not even half a year later as He11sing920 ("11" instead of "LL") Hellsing tried to widen his audience by creating original rants and informative videos, bitching about shit no one cares about, including fans, anime, cellphones, golf, ICP, Chris-chan, Spax3, Sailormoonred1, TGWTG and The Dark Knight. Since then, Hellsing has regretted making these videos, yet he'll criticize guys like the Archfiend and BBC for making video after video attacking trivial stuff, despite the fact that he did the same thing in regards to the fanboys. Emer now spends his remaining days e-begging for people to buy him DVDs to view so he can uploads videos of himself watching the film and acting angry over how bad it is, since he's too lazy and cheap to download a movie from a site or buy a movie himself, despite now obtaining a full-time job at an Indian casino. Tragically, people actually do this. Much like Asalieri, Hellsing920 doesn't give a flying fuck about his fans, so why people donate movies to him (that he's likely not going to review anyway) is a mystery.

The Irate Gamer

The Irate Gamer

Basically, just cut and paste exactly what's been said above about the Angry Video Game Nerd, as that's pretty much what the Irate Gamer does himself anyway.

Just read his article. ED has wasted too much webspace on the plagiarizing cunt as it is.

Jedite1

Jedite1

Your typical basement-dwelling nerd... on steroids!

Anthony (Jedite1) was once looked up to as a God-like reviewer by his fellow YouTubers. Despite this, his reviews were basically the same thing as the Angry Video Game Nerd's, but with an annoying nasal voice, a slight lisp and a stutter. He then made Q&A videos, answering questions from his followers, which were also full of fail as he took at least thirty minutes to answer one question. Mysteriously disappeared from les tubes, only to return to show off his now muscular arms and pecs, as well as rant over the butthurt going on around les tubes. Buttbudies with Spax3.

He has since fallen off of the face of the earth once again and is now most likely in a developmental wrestling league harnessing his brilliant charisma and microphone skills. HE'S BACK!!! HE'S GONE!

  • jedite1 – Jedite1's YouTube channel.

LeisureSuitGaming / Silent Rob

Rob acquainting himself with someone he just met on the Internet.

Also known as the $5 man, Silent Rob, AKA the Ginger Whinger, is a hardcore Internet tough guy who is more known nowadays for his whiny emo diatribes than his "fuck"-fests in disguise as video game reviews. He got his start as an extremely overrated game "reviewer" best known for his Action 52 review, which was, shockingly, worse than the game was in all aspects. But after sucking Damien Estreich's cock enough in the attempt to receive a YouTube Partnership and the featuring of his videos on the main page, Mr. Estrech refused to give it to him, deeming his work unoriginal.

This is when Silent Rob busted down the floodgates and spent ten minutes bitching about the Irate Gamer, in which his arguments, for every small truth they may have had, were cockblocked by at least fifteen references to IG "loving the cock" per truth. His fanbase, being as intelligent as lemmings, followed his orders and started hating the reviewer, spawning a great, yet pathetic, amount of proxy lulz that still lingers to this day.

Rob has still not gotten over the butthurt of not becoming a YouTube Partner. Seeing the likes of the AVGN, That Guy with the Glasses, and Yahtzee making money hands over fists, he has since gotten into Internet panhandling by creating his own website devoted to his poorly-made, unfunny abortions that he calls videos.

But this story has a twist: He charges people $5 just to visit it. He has rightfully suffered backlash from his loyal followers, finally seeing how shitty his work really is. The ensuing lulz that has resulted from Silent Rob's butthurt and subsequent bawwwing about the website can be best described as the funniest thing that man has ever done.

Rob also boasts that he fucked some female game reviewer IRL. Not that it means much.

Had an infamous battle with the YouTube super douchbag TheArchfiend...in which his butt hole suffered a severe tearing.

Also changes his opinion on games to reflect the opinion of his butt buddy razorfist.

Pat The NES Punk

Pat The NES Punk

AKA Pat Contri, Pat The NES Punk is one of the biggest whores in the video game reviewing community, with his entire career dedicated to desperately riding the coat-tails of more popular reviewers for his own personal gain. It's virtually impossible to see any presence of him on the web where he isn't ass kissing the AVGN, Spoony, LordKat or more recently Brentalfloss so he can cameo in their videos.

So beware if you're a popular reviewer, He'll be sucking on your cock like a baby on a bottle before long!

The ironic twist is that even after taking it up the ass from every reviewer possible, he's still only managed to rake in a paltry 24,000 subscribers on YouTube, for the sole reason his bland, generic and ultimately forgettable videos are no different from the thousands of other basement dwellers reviewing 25-year-old video games. In fact, his only note worthy aspect is he's pathetic enough to waste his life savings collecting the entire library of NES games. Which only amounts to a wall-sized plastic effigy of his worthlessness.

Pat also tends to act erratically, as he barged his way into Retroware TV, getting into a bitter e-drama power struggle with Austin Mackert before finally getting his butt buddies to gang up on him and push him off the site to win ultimate power. He now rules a site viewed by no one with an iron fist, a small fish in an even smaller pond.

More recently, Pat was also one of those who promoted the scam that was the Cheetahmen II Kickstarter, and like AVGN, he also deleted comments that said anything remotely related to "scam", but unlike the AVGN, he never apologized for his actions.

Rest assured, our little cock-sucking Hitler with his strange drunk, prepubescent voice, will always try some new plan to get someone else's fanbase to watch his insomnia curing drivel.

Pat has appeared on the TV "show" Pawn Stars, which he used as an opportunity to gloat about his plastic gold in front of the world. Yeah "I'd like to sell," sure.

THE PODCAST

Like a lot of Youtubers in the Patreon age, Pat discovered he could create a podcast to shit out content without copyright issues. He chose a local game store clerk to be his co-host, and hilariously, manages to get twice the Patreon money as Pat does. This either proves that people feel sorry for a working man versus some douche who keeps a collection of NES games or the Internet doesn't care for Pat like AVGN.

The podcast tends to focus on Internet drama, new retro technology and harassing questionable eBay sellers that don't need the publicity. Many felt that whatever little charm Pat had from his decade of videos wore off as his true opinions reveal himself to be a dick and a bully with his beliefs. Meanwhile, his co-host Ian Fageson drinks a 40, nearly passes out drunk, spouts off SJW white knighting and literally getting fatter off Patreon.

THE DVD COLLECTIONS

Unable to fund DVDs of his video series and live in one of the most expensive areas of the US (San Diego), Pat went to IndieGoGo. The interesting thing here is he didn't use it to crowd fund physical copies, he used it to sell bits from his collection. He turned IndieGoGo into a store, selling Sega Genesis, NES, N64s and SNES. He did this several times for different volumes. [volume 4 || volume 3]

PeteDorr

PeteDorr loves unboxings. Really, really, loves 'em!

Pete "will I ever get laid?" Bore Dorr is a New York-dwelling virgin who owns a Massive! collection of video games. He started out on YouTube in October 2008, after he made a video about four RPGs on the Wii. It's unclear as to how this virgin accumulated a fanboy mass of over 50,000 through making videos of "Games he bought recently" (maybe it's his Jesus haircut) and showing off unboxings of gaming consoles he bought off eBay. He also streams live footage of himself playing with a shit game system known as the "Vectrex." He repeatedly tells his fanboys that the Vectrex looks terrible unless you see it in person, but that doesn't stop him from filming it more and more.

In December 2008, Pete posted what was to become his most popular video: His "room tour." The drama quickly came to the lulz. Not only was he getting trolled for being a virgin, but his douchebag fanboys were constantly begging him to make another room tour. Apparently Pete will make another one once he "cleans up" his room - as in, when he manages to hide all his Sonic porn from view. Oh, did I mention? He's a Massive! Sonic fan.

Pete's ego, like every other game reviewer, grows; It grew rapidly. He recently became a YouTube partner, but ads appeared on the videos - Good job Pete! Milking the cash cow... Like every other partner whore on YouTube. He now neglects the fan messages he gets ("too many, you guys!") but always finds time to answer ones that will let him display his knowledge of obscure and rightfully forgotten video games.

Pete gets to live with no real responsibilities. He lives at a house that's paid for by others, he eats food that's paid for by others, and he's protected by insurance that's paid for by others. This means that every cent he makes off of his minimum wage job as a cashier at Best Buy can go towards some more video game-related shit. Whether it's his fourth copy of a game he's never bothered to play, a different color of a console (for "collecting purposes"), or a $1,000 wine glass featuring a probably forged signature, Pete will get to live as a child for as long as he can keep his free-loading ass at his parents' home.

College? Oh, he's already graduated... with an art degree. Nice choice there, buddy. You'll be off on a real career in no time! As a Best Buy cashier for the rest of your life.

  • PeteDorr – Pete Dorr's YouTube channel.

PlayItBogart / PiBhas5stars

PlayItBogart / PiBhas5stars

The only game reviewer on YouTube to even cum close to the word decent, but he got suspended for "accidentally" posting vids of him having gay sex with his boyfriend. He then decided to post his vids on Revver How do we know this? Cuz this homo came back to YouTube and made another account (with another video) to let the world know his homosexuality. [2]

ProJared

Moar info: ProJared.

ProJared

ProJared is a 39-year-old progeria-inflicted video game reviewer who loves talking about major titles such as High Seas Trader, King's Knight and Scorched Earth. Spends each Christmas season boring everyone with videos about Dungeons & Dragons, which are some of the least-watched videos on his main channel, yet he continues to do them every December. Also does Pokémon Nuzlocke challenges, wherein he gives the Pokémon dumb names, the most famous of which being a Vileplume named 'Nuptup' (hence the Vileplume behind him in many of his videos). And let's not forget he's a smug that thinks he's better than others and get a raging boner for deeply sniffing farts.

  • DMJared – ProJared's YouTube channel.

Retrogamer3

RetroGamer3
RetroGamer3 getting ready to rape some games.

Retrogamer3 (real name Ed Findlay, also known as The Welfare Gamer, formally known as The Gaming Rapist) is a Canadian YouTube partner that is pretty much a prime example of when game reviewers run out of ideas for their shows, and decide to use terms such as rape and welfare to be funny. He owns a company known as ETF Films. Before taking the route of putting his Retrogamer3 reviews on hold, he has made poor quality AVGN spin-offs since 2007. Not that long ago he was known as The Gaming Rapist The Welfare Gamer, due to the fact that everyone didn't find rape to be funny. Recently, he has returned to his old ways again, too bad no one cares either way.

His The Gaming Rapist The Welfare Gamer reviews do have an interesting concept of him being a rapist homeless bum, who finds games in the garbage, and plays them, drinks booze (or listerine), and repeat the latter two, then there's all his reviews in a nutshell.

HURR I NEED BOOZE.

He's a blatant AVGN fanboy, who has a signed copy of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and a picture of James Rolfe to jack off to as well. Since he protects his ego and hates all sorts of criticism, he will take down any sort of comment/video for copyright infringement or hate speech.
Jfreedan recently joined forces with him to take down their trolls of YouTube and to get more subscribers. Like his butt buddy, he has won countless awards in Canadia for the most punchable face. He's affiliated with GotGame. Ed also has no clue what the hell Fair use is (or Fair Dealings in this case since he's Canadian). Because of this he made about a four-minute video addressing "YouTube trolls", talking out his ass about copyright, insulting Americans (hate speech, what's that?), and mugging the camera with that punchable face of his.

The former Games Rapist tries to get traffic to his shitty website by making official sounding NES remakes for PC and sequels such as Bionic Commando 2, Dr. Jekel & Mr. Hyde Revised and Faxanadu Remastered. This talent-less Youtuber even tried to Kickstarter Faxanadu Remastered for a mere $800 and luckily the property holder caught on (faxanadu-remastered). Since then he's managed to pay $100 to get a game onto Steam that would have never passed through Greenlight.

When he does Let's Plays and Streams he tends to use pictures of hot chicks to lure in losers. Then when they watch his streams to see his balding, ugly head, they realize what losers they really are when they see him. He always caps off or starts a stream with his own games for the traffic (video).

Retroware TV

The Retroware.TV posse...
in all their pathetic glory.

Retroware TV, originally created as a more serious alternate site to ScrewAttack for retro fans to enjoy reasonably well researched retrospectives, did start out out as a respectable site. But as with all good things on the internet, became corrupt over the years, mainly due to the owner Lance "Ito Bandito" Cortez gaining a lethal dose of USI, and having neurotic tenancies of firing anyone who objected to his barrage of constant Nazi-esque demands of total obedience as well as hiring complete pieces of shit such as Austin Mackert and Pat the NES Punk turning the site into a even bigger corrupt and ultimately unwatchable cesspit.

Allegedly, their bullying demands of absolute loyalty and forcing contributors to leave more profitable websites were even inadvertently responsible for the financial ruin and eventual suicide of JewWario. Though their live stream marathons for suicide charities surely washed the blood off their hands, because they're such nice guys! *smiley face*

The site does still contain a few decent people such as Clan of the Grey Wolf, Rerez, Derek "HVGN" Alexander, Pixel Dan and Lazy Game Reviews EDIT: NOPE, THEY FUCKED OFF TOO. All of whom are kept around as they are vastly more popular than the rest of RWTV. Luckily you can see all their content on YouTube, so you don't have to set foot on RWTV's shitty site.

SashaNein / Still Gaming

SashaNein / StillGaming

SashaNein, (Also known as "Still Gaming") initially appears to to a sensible, rational human being, with well thought out video game reviews and agreeable points on mid-80's to early-90's technology, but instead turns out to be a complete and utter fucking nut-job wacko.

He suffers from a severe case of hypochondria, in his case a crippling stomach pain which makes him incapable of making reviews for months at a time, but bizarrely also allows him to make countless "vlogs" describing his symptoms constantly to gain sympathy votes.

When SashaNein's not making videos about his stomach illness, He enjoys taking it up the ass from PBC Productions, Classic Game Room and That Guy with the Glasses as he can never get through one fucking video or paragraph without sucking up to them at least twice. (though being their bitch may actually explain his constant stomach pains).

SashaNein also is the only person on YouTube to suffer from pretend Lou Gehrig's disease, as he has never appeared moving on screen. He's only seen in a collection of awkward poses to slightly lessen the monotony of his rants.

SashaNein has, on rare occasions, shown the potential to be a good source of e-drama as he becomes agitated and defensive quite easily. Whether it's fending off criticism of his derivative and mediocre work, or standing up for his whale of a fiancée Dena after she revealed herself to be a furry. These events did not nearly create as much lulz as they could have due to his show being of such little noteworthiness at the time they simply flew under the radar.

Spax3

Spax3 hated Sonic 2006 so much he bought it twice.
Spax and his buttbuddies.

Teh biggest Sonic fanboy on the entire Internet (although he would eventually be surpassed by the ultimate Sonic buttfucker Sonmanic). He recently became an hero closing his YouTube account because of cyberbullying. He wants to fuck Cream the Rabbitch, cuz Spax3 iz a pedo, amirite? However, he's still making game reviews on his own website for all of his gaymer fans along with other mediocre reviewers and butbuddies. But be warned, any mockery of him on the Internet could result in legal action from his E-lawyer mother. He named his show CartoonNetwork ASN (A Shitty Network) to honor the original Cartoon Network, as if that network was worth honoring in the first place.

SpoonyOne

I AM NOT IN THE MOOD TO BE FUNNY!
SpoonyOne
He tried to get this pitched for a kid's show, not kidding.

SpoonyOne is another run-of-the-mill video game reviewer on YouTube, but there is one big difference: he was actually funny at one point. He started out as your typical YouTube reviewer, but emerged as a great with his effective trolling of the Final Fantasy community with his reviews bashing Final Fantasy VIII. As fanboys of the series were butthurt by these outright lies, it sparked wave after wave of lulzy comments and replies talking about how he's a /v/irgin that will never get laid.

Since then, Spoony has tried his hand at other forms of entertainment. Sadly, none of them were very good. Most of his normal reviews that have time and effort put into them may provide some laughs, but sadly Spoony is not competent enough to produce a regularly satisfying quality of work that is capable of entertaining anyone but the most devoted fans. Among these failed attempts at humor and entertainment Spoony has spent particularly shameful stretches of time where he revisits the lazy man's way of recording oneself playing video games for the Internet known as the atrocious "Let's Play" trend, his insufferably unfunny alter ego known as Doctor Insano, his affiliation with the sinkhole of Internet talent known as That Guy with the Glasses/Blistered Thumbs along with the constant get-togethers and crossovers they require their members to partake in, the insipid "Game/Movie in five Seconds" series which appeals greatly to his aforementioned tendencies to put as little effort as possible into the majority of his work, and his near constant vlogs which are little more than watching a bitter manchild sit in his room and whine incessantly or drone on about something that does not warrant getting in front of a camera to talk about for upwards of 30-40 minutes. Coincidentally, these horrid vlogs now account for the majority of the content Spoony is producing.

A word of advice: Troll moar. Then you will become an winrar and indeed win the prize.

WHOA NOW! E-DRAMA AHOY!

Since he muscled out all the other nerds and won the Mashable "Funniest Person to Follow"-title, viewers were expecting some kind of celebratory speech. What they got, however, was a two-page written rant, lashing out at his fans for not liking his crossover collaborations with TGWTG, blaming all the viewers for the butthurt the criticism has caused among his neckbeard Blistered Thumbs buddies, and telling his fans to "just fucking leave my site if they don't like it". Apparently his acceptance speech got trolled by fans of the other contestants so he flipped the fuck out on EVERYBODY. Ha Ha, Oh Wow, talk about mood swings! For a guy whose claim to fame is trolling Final Fantasy fanboys he sure has some frail nerves.

Don't be so sure about that.

Stan Burdman

Stan Burdman in his bed.
Misleading tags are against YouTube's policy you know.

A seemingly innocent looking reviewer, and has been reviewing for years. His reviews are just your typical bland ones from any AVGN rip-off you see these days, but voice sounds similar to Christopher Walken's. He even makes some typical funny troll videos for humor. So surely there can't be anything wrong with this guy?

Well, what goes behind the scenes is a whole different story. While back then this wasn't a problem, but ever since he got partnered with YouTube, he's became one of the biggest advertisement whores when it comes to video game reviewing. Becoming affiliated with Amazon so he can put referral links on where to buy the games that he reviews, so don't click those links he puts in the description, unless you're a retard that likes giving him more money.

This guy is also part of Asalieri's circle jerk. As in a more recent event, after YouTube decided to make tags hidden on the video page, like everyone else who wanted to abuse the system, Stan Burdman started using popular reviewer names in the tags in his reviews such as AVGN, ScrewAttack, G4, etc. Someone who used to be part of Asalieri's group actually confronted him, but was immediately barred from his channel and told his fanboys to point and laugh at his attempts of trolling. Stan did cover his tracks and removed such tags on his videos, but not before someone did screenshot a video that had the tags.

Taco-Man

The taco himself.

A show about a cartoon taco that started out as Captain N parody that became a video game review show that was relevant for 3 days, is getting canceled soon because the creator realized that the show was not giving him as much YouTube money compare to his shitty parodies.

  • ebolaworld – Official Ebolaworld YouTube channel.
  • Ebolaworld64 – New Taco-Man Plays A Video Game YouTube channel.

The 7th Level

Taking his "badass" wearing of sunglasses inside habit and faux-metal theme from razorfist, 7th is a Sony fanboy who engages in online arguments with oh-so-cleverly named "Xbots". He has a son of which little is known, but it can be assumed he is raped nightly by his balding manchild father.

  • 7thLeveLReviews – His channel. Prepare for yelling at the camera and shitty chroma key.
  • the7thlevl – Old account before he pulled a leaving YouTube forever.

UrinatingTree

UrinatingTree
(Avatar - Never Seen IRL)

A horribly unfunny reviewer whose "persona" was just talking in an annoying voice and pointlessly screaming into a microphone expecting people to laugh.

The pathetic excrement of a man never showed his face, much to the benefit of the Internet, but it can be said that he is probably a 500-plus-pound diabetic who quotes Family Guy like the Bible, has no friends, and guzzles sugar by the pound. Remember, this is merely a probably accurate guess of what he is, as he never revealed any personal info about himself.

After months of failing horribly at everything he ever did, UrinatingTree finally realized his videos were shit so he deleted his account and all his videos in what was to be called V-T day. His fanbois bawwed until he made a TL;DR essay on why he fucked off. UrinatingTree basically said that he didn't want his "legacy" to be in those videos (i.e. his parents found out about his reviews and threatened to cut down his Internet if he didn't delete them). Being a complete hypocrite, he has since returned to YouTube only to constantly remind his fanbase on how he failed to be a hero during his hiatus.

He recently uploaded his first videos in over a year and could only muster over 100 views each. Say goodbye to your fifteen minutes of fame, pisstree.

WizWar100 / LazyWorkCreations

WizWar100 / LazyWorkCreations

Commonly known in the trade as a U.F.O. (An Unfunny Fucker Online) WizWar100 is an extremely untalented chink immigrant, who mixes his time of reviewing video games that the Angry Video Game Nerd or Armake21 have already covered with chopping up the neighbors Alsations for his parents sweat shop Chinese Take Away.

Now called "LazyWorkCreations" (should have been LazyWOKCreations Amirite?) because the stupid bastard forgot his old YouTube password, he now fills his account with Q&A's that contain answers to questions noone asked, videos of his friends at college getting pissed off with a slitty-eyed fucker shoving a camera in their face constantly and clips of him playing Beta/Demo versions of PS3 games because his immigrant welfare check won't cover a full game. He currently spends his wasted life on the Spoony Experiment forums spamming his shitty videos and constantly crying about how he will never be a popular, recognized reviewer.

xRazorfistx

xRazorfistx jacking off.
Razorfist arguing with a troll. Afterwards, Razor threatened to add him to his blocklist.
A photo of Razor when he was a part of a shitty metal band called Mortiferus.

xRazorfistx (Powerword: Daniel Harris) is A weedy little metalfag, who after watching some Zero Punctuation episodes and shitting on them, decided to see if he could do better and the result was his little review show he named The Rageaholic, which is basically just him whining about how gaming has gone to shit and how his opinion is so much better than yours.

If you rightly point out just how similar his style is to that of Yahtzee Crowshaw and Zero Punctuation (whom he ingeniously refers to as Nahtzee and Zero Originality) he will throw a massive hissyfit and post a TL;DR reply to you, essentially saying, "NUH UH!!"

It's interesting to note that xRazorfistx is a massive fan of and claims to be heavily influenced by the comedy stylings of Denis Leary. This is appropriate, since Denis Leary is a massive sellout whore who ripped off the act of a far more talented performer and tried to pass it off as his own without anybody noticing, too.

He is friends with attention whore Asalieri, and will defend him to his death if he has to. Often considered the embodiment of /v/ by his enemies and loves to piss off the fanboys of the games he reviews, such as Call of Dooty and Catherine, which is just basically him bashing weeaboos for most of the duration of his supposed review. His own fanboys mostly consist of various retarded tryhard manchildren who just nod to everything he says and metalfags, who will attack any one who opposes the almighty xRazorfistx. Him supporting the fat fuck Asalieri overall just hinders his credibility, what little he already has of it.

Lately he has been under attack due to an anonymous user on 4chan linking his videos on /v/ (it has since been discovered that the person linking them is a autistic xRazorfistx fanboy, although many say its just a troll, either way the guy is a faggot [3]), leading gullible retards to believe that he was the one promoting his videos. Due to the attacks, fanboys have come to defend the reviewer, mainly just accusing the attackers of being "butthurt". Due to the fact the faggot keeps spamming 4chan every so often, certain users on YouTube have been trying to edit this section in order to give xRazorfistx a more positive image.

   
 
So... My beautiful face and bitchin' taste in music invalidates perfectly valid gameplay grievances?

How do you clench your ass-cheeks without decapitating yourself, you knuckle-dragging, quasi-sentient AIDS germ?"
 


 
 

A typical response from Razorfist.

Even more forgettable reviewers (Less than 5,000 subs)

The following people are the lowest of the low in terms of reviewers, as evidenced by the fact no one subscribes to them. But make a notable appearance here, due to either their BAWWWWW-fests on camera, or the sheer fact, their epic lulzness deserves pointing out to prospecting trolls bored of attacking the likes of Chris-chan or Spax3 & Spax old friend/ now rival Lina Artemis .

AkewsticRockR

AkewsticRockR

Kyle James AKA Rainn Wilson's long lost bastard love-child, is a YouTube Christian who breaks many of God's laws on a frequent basis and is clearly going to Hell when he dies. AkewsticRockR is guilty of making a constant practice of the sins of pride, wrath, hypocrisy, homosexuality, lying, and not loving thy neighbors like he loves himself (and he loves himself a lot). Despite all of this, AkewsticRockR is happy to preach to any and all who say a single curse-word on YouTube about his or her sins and how they are to be condemned for it.

AkewsticRockR started out on YouTube by plagiarizing the Angry Video Game Nerd's TMNT review in a horribly unfunny, Christian BAWfest. His subsequent videos have proven equally talentless. He used to have YouTube warz with another basement dweller by the name of Undercoverfilmer00v, but UCF became butthurt from the constant bitching from AkewsticRockR and fucked off from YouTube, thus ending the lulz.

He tried to start another war with Silent Rob, a talentless, butthurt, emaciated hick who never leaves his mother's attic. Targetting Rob, (a moar popular reviewer) would seem like a good shot at publicity, but since Rob black person into his videos, nothing interesting happened.

I watch his videos like all the fucking day and I've even masturbated to them on numerous occasions.

Alexander4488

It burns! It burns! IT BURNS!!

A butthurt game reviewer who is less known for his appallingly bad game reviews and more known for his self-fellating advertisements on every gaming website known to man. Like another overly-egotistical game reviewer, he goes to film school and fancies himself as the second-coming of the AVGN on YouTube. Bottom line, he is a disgrace to all video game reviewers and a way bigger AVGN rip-off than the Irate Gamer. Alexander started out on YouTube as the 'Annoyed Gaming Geek', but changed his name to 'Game Dude' after realizing the former sounded like a shameless rip-off of 'Angry Video Game Nerd' (note that Alexander the Attention Whore promoted this name change on gaming messageboards). Regardless, Alexander still ends many of his videos with the text "nerdspired", i.e., inspired by the Nerd.

His blatant egotism came to head after a YouTube commentary group riffed on one of his videos. Being absolutely batshit insane, he came to his own defense with a barrage of comments, until his own replies actually outnumbered the number of views the video had. Safe to say, his sheer butthurt generated great lulz for those who witnessed it. It should also be noted that Alexander's most-viewed video, his review of Mickey Mousecapade on the NES, only got its popularity due to it being hilariously ridiculed by the Game Grumps.

On cue, Alexander has made multiple accounts on ED after this stub was written in an effort to defend his actions. He predictably failed.

The Angry Video Game Nerd (Isvaffel)

Open Dohr. To Hell.
And this was a month after JamesNintendoNerd's channel was created.

According to his fanbois, started out on YouTube around 2002 (even though YouTube wasn't set up until 2005). A Finnish troll by the name Jaakko "Isvaffel" Järvinen REALLY started out by posting his videos calling himself the AVGN on /v/, as well as posting random derpy pictures of himself, during the time when James Rolfe was at the beginning of his prime. Eventually he was banned on /v/, but not before grabbing himself a fanbase from there as well as gaining more fans by misleading idiots to his videos by having "The Angry Video Game Nerd" title on his review videos.

Isvaffel's AVGN reviews can be best described as being hard to understand since he has poor English and mumbles a lot, being usually poor quality, or just being a typical troll review. All he does is just play the game randomly (on the hardest difficulty if available), sucking at the game, maybe talking incoherently about some problems about the game, and then ends the video randomly during gameplay. They barely qualify as a game reviews or AVGN rip-offs since he's rarely angry during his reviews. He has done over ONE THOUSAND game "reviews", and has made over 9,000 random pointless videos (like videos of his cats, random music videos that could get him in trouble for copyright infringement, or just random shit). His catchphrase is pretty stupid, in his game reviews he says "Open Dohr" whenever he opens a door.

To no one's surprise, yes, this faggot does have a fanbase and they'll usually argue that Jaakko was AVGN before James was, which may or may not be true, but really who the fuck cares?

Isvaffel has gone through several youtube accounts throughout the years due to copyright infringing AVGN weeaboo music/television companies. But losing an account never seems to close his dohrs.

Bastard Gamer / judekhanzo

Joel Holmes, being "SRSLY ANGRY".
Joel's loving family. Notice the exclusion of Joel.

In recent years, with the success of wonderful websites like TGWTG, it was inevitable that eventually everybody on YouTube would become an angry reviewer, and for Joel Holmes it was more than a good enough reason to get started in angry reviewing. He decided to call his character "The Bastard Gamer", which is at least semi-original considering the amount of "That Blanks with the Blanks" in the world. His modus operani is to review bargain bin video games from GameStop and other shit he had laying around his mancave. He was eventually recruited by FreezeCracker.com, the home of Geoff Mendicino and Gamelife, which did wonders for his already-inflated ego.

Because he was getting called out on his 'success', he became an anti-troll within the YouTube community, so he could take a stand against a channel he deemed a threat to his ego. He has decided to play The Commentary Game with his buddy above, Asalieri, and make enjoyable parody videos of even more successful YouTubers like Irate Gamer and Alexander4488. Even though trolling these people have already been beaten to death with a hammer, sent to Auschwitz, cremated in a gigantic oven, and then sent to Haiti as a form of toilet paper - they still continue to do it anyway. Currently, he has no fucking clue if he wants to be an angry reviewer who wants fellatio from the female cast of Street Fighter, or if he wants to be a parody of angry reviewers who wants fellatio from the female cast of Street Fighter. Maybe he should stick to making AMVs.

Every day Today also happens to be Joel's birthday, so please feel free to wish him a very happy birthday and send him a card at:

Joel Holmes
3215 Bernet Street
Burton, MI 48529

Unfortunately, because of his severe case of diabeetus he does not accept mail orders for birthday cake. He will, however, accept vast quantities of pizza and beer.

Friends with asalieri again

Once upon a time Asa and Joel use to be best friends until It Came From Public Domain (A antilulz MST3000 rip-off group) told Eric to troll Joel which he did gladly because fuck friendship, amirite? So Asa and ICFPD trolled Joel by recording their conversation and getting all sorts of juicy details like his former McDonald's boss said he had to smoke crack with him or he'd be fired. LOL!

Asa trolling Joel as well as some lulzy judekhanzo extras

The fat man matches on.

The Judekhanzo audition for It Cam From Public Domain

Shortly after Joel found out that Asa trolled him he ripped off Asa by making RaRs in full Windows Movie Maker glory.

Since reuniting Joel has joined Asa on his new abortion of a series "Hopefully Gaming".

CazTheGamerGuy

CazTheGamerGuy is some twat who bitches about Pokémon every five fucking seconds on YouTube like the butthurt fanboy he is. He started off his channel in 2010 as a Shantae fanboy, but abandoned it because his parents found out about his fetish for it. He came back to review DS games on the same channel instead of starting fresh because he's a moron and stole a seven-year-old's bought a 3DS and Vita to do "reviews" on games that come out on them. He's a Canadian YouTuber and takes baths in maple syrup to clean out his nasty ballsack in between trying to "review" a game.



ConsoleVania / VideoGaiden

ConsoleVania / VideoGaiden
(Left) Rab Florence
(Right) Ryan McCloud

ConsoleVania (otherwise known as VideoGaiden in its watered-down BBC guise) is a series presented by a pair of arrogant, pretentious, egocentric, self-obsessed Scottish twats, who proclaim themselves to be the saviours of video gaming on the Internet and British television, but ended up failing on a level of epic 9/11 proportions due to their own narcissism. It doesn't help that because of their thick Scottish accents, it is impossible to understand what the fuck they're actually saying 98% of the time.

It's presented by Robert Florence, the bastard love child of a shaved bear and Rab C. Nesbit, & Ryan McCloud, the stereotypical quieter, even less talented hanger-on. The two Jocks stumble around screen attempting to be funny in sketches, while occasionally reviewing a video game for ten seconds with a slew of profanities when they can be bothered.

One day, some highly innovative BBC producer (who coincidentally turned out to be a friend) knocked on their door asking if they could air their quality entertainment on "BBC2 Scotland" at a time when everyone is in bed asleep (Sunday at midnight). Rab's and Ryan's egos went through the roof proclaiming that their program would be the greatest gaming TV show on British television since GamesMaster (which admittedly isn't that hard, considering all gaming TV shows are shit anyway by default). Unfortunately, what they produced turned out to be a 30-minute sketch show of them desperately trying to be recognized as comedians, and completely ignored the fact that it was supposed to be a show that reviews video games.

The BBC dumped them off regional television airwaves completely for the third series when they realized that it was genuinely shit and no one watched it (not even Scottish insomniacs) and ran it on a tiny sub-section of their Scottish website instead. Rab and Ryan valiantly claimed that "TV is dead" in a poor attempt to save face, days before the BBC pulled the plug altogether. Nowadays, Rab enjoys pointing out how much more talented he is than other video game reviewers and Gaming TV presenters to his small legion of ass-kissing fanboys on his forum, occasionally making a high quality video for YouTube that everyone watches, while Ryan still hangs on to him like a dried piece of shit on a pubic hair.

Undoubtedly one of his trolls will notice this article in due course, which'll make Rab go off on a butthurt rant all over again about how much better than everyone else he is.

Darknessthecurse

Darknessthecurse

A graduate of the UrinatingTree School of Reviewing, this man manages to somehow make the aforementioned failure seem superior. His main "skill" is a scream that can make your ears bleed in 3.4 seconds flat. Is also responsible for the significant popularity of even shittier game reviewers, including his BFF Rijno. Unsurprisingly, this man has over ten thousand subscribers at his beck and call, as the people who follow this stuff on YouTube travel in packs.

  • Darknessthecurse Darknessthecurse's YouTube channel. CLOSED DUE TO EAR-RAPING SCREAMS!!!

The Emo Review aka Jason Heine

Desperately trying to not look like a fat ginger cunt... which he obviously is.

Jason Heine is without a doubt the most smug, self-important bastard out of the All Gen Gamers lot. He's constantly talking about his degree in music engineering and how he's an "audio expert," even though he has nothing to back up that claim. (Case in point: his first intro bit for the podcast was immediately rejected by the other hosts as well as the listeners, and his entry into an audio contest for some Need for Speed game didn't even place among the first round of finalists.) Jason released some god-awful (and I mean God-fucking-AWFUL) rap albums filled with songs concerning either A. women leaving him or B. how awesome he is (listen to "J-Heine" if you want to see exactly how pathetic he is). This was before he had an army of fanboy ass-kissers, but since his rise to Z-list YouTube fame he has received nothing but extremely positive feedback for his "music." Just to cash in on the podcast, he recorded a retarded song called "Get Your Whale On" which only adds on to the podcast's overall furfaggotry.

Freezecracker (Geoff Mendicino)

Geoff Mendicino

Geoff Mendicino, an unfunny mentally deranged cunt, fuck-nut Mexican, whose sole aim in life is to make videos of him team-killing 13-year-old boys on Xbox Live and having anal sex with a Pikachu doll.

Originally a member of the retard fuck-fest that was GameLife, he ironically went on to make a website even more retarded called TheGameBoys and then FreezeCracker.com when YouTube B& his shitty trolling exploits.

Pissed off that he doesn't get his own article like Angry Video Game Nerd and is listed close to the bottom, he should probably kill himself of Super AIDS and Mega Cancer and become An Hero and make the world a better place.

Furious Famicom Faggot

Furious Famicom Faggot

Well, at least one third of his name describes himself perfectly. Can you find it?

A half-hearted attempt by Shmorky to parody the then-emerging video game reviewing movement on YouTube, we can only dream of what could have been. Despite having the potential to harvest great lulz out of the subgenre, it only ended up being a moment of great fail and reinforced how unfunny Something Awful is. The character was killed off after several episodes due to this obvious reason.

Futuramaooy

Futuramaooy

An irritating, curly-haired kangaroo fucker, whose whole pathetic, sad little life evolves around posting hate videos about the Irate Gamer (who clearly doesn't give a fuck about it, as he's never had them removed), posting boring fucking videos about how great Mega Man is, as well as other shitty NES games no one gives a fuck about & sucking Ben Croshaw's cock.

Next time Britain decides to deport their criminal scum out to the colonies, they might want to consider having them spayed first, as to avoid inbred abomination's such as Futuramaooy.

  • Futuramaooy Futuramaooy's YouTube channel. LOL CLOSED!.

Gamerweb 2.0

Game Zone
(Left) Carl "black person" Joseph
(Right) "Liam the Great" Farrell

Originally inspired to make a video game Internet show by Gamelife, The creators of Game Zone somehow managed to create a show that's even more retarded.

Presented by an emo black person with a speech-impediment (Carl) and a fat goth wrestling fan (Liam), two ex-presenters of a British satellite channel that no one ever watched (that they also did for free), the two morons stumble around screen attempting to review games in a professional manner, but ending up with epic lulz to be had all-round.

The show reached mini-meme levels when UK Resistance discovered their pilot for the Internet series, (then called the even more retarded GamerWeb 2.0) and loled at the fact they couldn't spell "Eye" correctly and assumed having a sock reviewing video games in a high-pitched voice was a good idea.

Their infamy fame turned them into such egotistical assholes, that they think TV companies want to snap up their idea for a gaming show.

UPDATE: Game Zone have now split, because Carl won't give Liam his 360 back that he borrowed.

Gligar13Vids

Jake wears dog collars in public, never showers, and sets fire to children's toys on camera. If you enjoy this kid's content, then please kill yourself immediately.

Gligar13Vids aka "Jacob Groszek" is a 20-something manchild that's most popular for "troll reviews" and more recently videos of him in his mom's car, usually spouting shitty modern 4chan memes or talking about furfaggotry. He used to be obsessed with Pokémon and Sonic and now he hates them because of the huge fanbase that has grown over time, so he filled the void with old tech hoarding. He has a little series called BAD GAMES and they are all of stuff from Nintendo, Sony, Capcom, Sega, and other big name companies that aren't Microsoft. He also has over 2,000 subscribers that BAWWW over his "master trolling" videos.

Besides making bait videos for Jewgle money, Gligar has videos of him destroying My Little Pony figures he used to play with and him driving in his mom's car. It's scary to know that drivers licenses are given to completely braindead morons such as Gligar13Vids, there are actually breathing parasites who thinks this retard has the necessary skills for simple tasks such as driving. And this retarded faggot got into a car crash and received a scar on his on his forehead, And also the police of Cincinnati, Ohio released a public domain document containing all of his information.

   
 
Because it's hot
 

 
 

Gligar13Vids after being told "Why do you jerk off to gay Pokémon hentai?

GreatExpectations320

GreatExpectations320

David "GreatExpectations320" Torok is the type of person that Encyclopedia Dramatica was made for. His videos and hurt ego proved that he is a wannabe emo, some preteen Jew who doesn't know what he's talking about and thus is just another unfunny 13-year-old YouTube user who reviews 30-year-old NES games that no one cares about. Embarrassing the video game community on a scale that wouldn't be emulated until Chadwardenn, he got PWNED by anyone of any sex, age, race, or creed within a 50-mile radius of an Internet connection.

David "greatexpectations320" Torok has only a handful of fans, yet that's moar than enough to make him think that he's super popular and funny, therefore making him serious business. Greatexpectations320 thinks that the FBI is willing to stop fighting terrorists and drug smugglers and instead go hunt the mean people on the Internet who make fun of him. Greatexpectations 320 is a poster child for underage B@,as evidenced by any of his reviews or the videos he post where claims to be the best game reviewer of teh tubes

If you'd like a chat with GE320, you may contact him at; Skype: ge320themanhimself

   
 
WHAT IN THE NAME OF JUMPED-UP JESUS CHRIST ON A MOUNTAIN OF DIARRHEA IN THE HOT SUN HAPPENED?!?!??!?!! I thought you could only sign into one account using 1 email address from now on! I guess that trolling cunt made a whole bunch more YT accounts with a whole bunch more email addresses, too! OMFG, what kind of SAD CUNT takes the time to create 30 different emails?!?!?!! Seriously! Holy shit...this is the fucking ULTIMATE PROOF that he has no life....
 

 
 

—ge320 crying about the haters

Jfreedan

Jfreedan about to go on a jog.[1]

Jfreedan (Real Name Carey Ray Martell, also known as The RPG Fanatic, also known as Running Faggot) is a little man/nobody/smug, douchebagish, homophobic ephebophile who takes unwarranted self importance to the next level and barely qualifies as a US Veteran. He claims to be an expert at everything he does such as martial arts, weight training, film and game design, but often gets into arguments with people who actually are professionals. He will never admit he is wrong, and go through great lengths to prove that he is correct about every subject known to man even if the rest of the world knows he's nothing more than a lying sack of shit. His review show "The RPG Fanatic" shows just how much "talent" he has in film making, which is nothing more than a low quality mimic of AVGN Irate Gamer staring Jfreedan who claims to know everything there is about RPGs and talking sword that says "hilarious" quotes such as "Well this game sucks donkey balls!" He also occasionally dresses up as Pedobear too, showing us for what he truly is. What a coincidence that he also practices cybering as a young girl too to keep that label. We're just waiting to see him on the news and the person who caught him to say "I found him out using Rules 29 & 30."

Jfreedan doing what he does on a daily basis: Threatening to sue.

Carey Martell is the most vain, self-centered, arrogant troll you'll ever have the displeasure of meeting online. There simply is no match for his deluded ego on this planet, it makes Billy Idol Doug Walker seem like the most humble person ever to have walked the earth in comparison. Apparently, he also suffers from That Guy with the Glasses syndrome, because jfreedan thinks that whatever he says is holy and true and whoever makes a video disagreeing with him will inflict severe butthurt and will send his fanbois (and occasionally himself, if he can get off of his lazy ass from eating lead paint chips to do so), flag the video to oblivion, then fap in celebration once it's removed. If the account was removed too, he picks a random fan to suck his minicock too.

Carey Martell also has won several awards nationwide for most punchable face in the USA in back to back years. If you see him, congratulate him!

Carey Martell and his 60% disability. The government pays Carey Martell because he can't control his bowels.

KingMasterReview

KingMasterReview.

All video game reviewers are idiots, but KingMasterReview takes this to a level beyond our comprehension. He can't spell the simplest of words for fucking shit and the way he structures sentences leaves one to wonder how someone with a cognitive ability such as his can even breathe. However, this is nothing compared to what you are about to read: KingMasterReview believes he lives with Silver the Hedgehog. He goes so far as to make YouTube videos, pretending to be Silver, performing various antics such as asking to be in a new game or having interviews, the latter of which ended with KingMasterReview and Silver engaged in anal sex (this is not a joke).

LiamRproductions

LiamRproductions
(Avatar - No pic available)

LiamRproductions is your typical run-of-the-mill fool who reviews Xbox 360/Wii games with a fucking annoying accent. His first few videos were shit nobody cares about until he released a series called Sonic/Mario games that suck, and that is how he got most of his subscribers. It's just a shame those two series managed to rip-off ScrewAttack's exact video, except for some added crap (if any at all.)

Nowadays, he's gone back to uploading Q&As with questions noone asked, BAWWWWWing on how YouTube doesn't pay him and pointless shit that shouldn't be on YouTube. FULL STOP!

Mariotehplumber/Testies125/richestplayerinrs/SONIC1SONICHEDGEHOG

Mariotehplumber had that finger up somewhere.

This manchild has an unhealthy obsession with the classic Sonic, curses more often than the Tourettes Guy, and misspells simple words like "moron" and "ain't" (a grade school kid has better grammar than he). His audio quality is usually shitty, and his "videos" are usually just still images (of the classic Sonic.) In his Sonic-related reviews, he bitches about not being able to play as "da klaysic Sannic" or "da Sannicwuhnsannic", moans about how he wants the first Sonic the Hedgehog game in 3D, calls the modern Sonic's quills "hentai quills", and says that people want to shove hedgehog quills into their anuses. In his non-Sonic related reviews, he says that games are ripping off Mario/The Legend of Zelda when they actually aren't. This smegma biter is better off jacking off to his precious "klasyic sannic" toys and shoving it up his butthurt virgin ass.

Mike Helgeson/ PC-ENGINE HELL/ Amakusa666

PC-ENGINE HELL
MOTHER FUCKING E-LAWYERS AT THEIR WORST.

A miserable, bitter, greedy over 30 Jewish kike fanboy of the TurboGrafx-16, NEO・GEO, NES, ENIAC, Betamax, tape reels, pretty colors that flash rapidly, acid, and the GI Joe: A Real American Hero toyline, who also happens to be a known child slavery ring leader, pimp, and drug den renter on the mean streets of Bentonville, Arkansas. He has also been known to kidnap people from fucking China and sell them to the highest bidder, either as house maids and nannys, or pre-ground into beef mince, because everyone knows the there's no burger like a Chinese one. After he finishes making really really really really really shitty gameplay videos of video games no one in the right mind gives a fuck about on Lubetube, he logs in at the Digital Press and HissTank forums just to brag about the shit he owns and start shit with other game and toy collecting nerds because his "life" is fucking miserable. Usually he starts fights with and harasses forum moderators too, so its fucking amazing why that shithead fuck has never been banned on any forum as of today, compared to totally innocent and all round great guys like Nintega who get fucking banned every other fucking Tuesday for no good reason. He has trolled and flamed more people than legendary Internet assholes like Spax3. If you say to him that his precious SuperGrafx system is a piece of flying gorilla shit spat forth from big green donkey dicks, this super mega faggot bitch asshole will go ballistic and hunt down your street address. Then him and his guido e-boyfriend, Jim Sinisi of Queens, NY who happens to log in at the PCEngineFX forums under the name Sinistron, will drive miles just to ass fuck you because his so-called wife refuses to let him do her in the shithole. He also has a sad habit of being a e-lawyer, and e-stalking, abusing, and harassing people he doesn't like.

You guys can spam his Myspace page as well too.

  • Amakusa666 The account of Amakusa666/PC-ENGINE HELL. Just a warning though, he's not even a actual game reviewer. He was just added to this list to help satisfy the emotional needs of that chiseled from stone nerd crusher Nintega, who also just happens to be God's magnum opus and the only reason the earth still exist today. Baleeted!

MonkeyGameGuides

Mariotehplumber

MonkeyGameGuides is an infamous troll and 'game reviewer' who is well-known for his rants and ramblings on video games. The thing is, he never actually reviews any games at all. Like any aspie, he has a complete spaz about the video games he review's being shit, and he then proceeds to compare them to his most Favorited video game, Call of Duty. The most distinct feature of MonkeyGameGuides is his strange Anglo-Australian/Cockney British accent. MonkeyGameGuidesis the literal definition of a British stereotype. He even has the absolutely DISGUSTING rotting yellow teeth to back up his negative stereotype of the British people. Many of MonkeyGameGuides videos are close-ups of his disgusting rotting teeth while he shouts about games with low quality audio. Overall, MonkeyGameGuides is an ugly, disgusting prick. Watching his videos is enough to make you loose your lunch and make you vomit all over your new carpet. Stay away from this putrid fuck like you would when it comes to talking to girls.

  • MonkeyGameGuides – Please stay away if you want to keep this morning breakfast turning into poo rather then puke.

Navgtr / Gaming in the Clinton Years

"George Wood," host of the now-retitled:
"Gaming in the Clinton Years"

Jack Thompson's attempt in the 1990's to become a legitimate video game critic. These videos are best described as a combination of epic fail and inadvertent lulziness. In these "reviews," Jack discusses his brilliant video game ideas, such as giving Lara Croft breast cancer, driving the speed limit while taking a woman to the labor ward, and playing as a batshit insane lawyer who must defend himself for mailing gay porn to a judge.

These videos were seen by the National Academy of Video Game Testers and Reviewers and were picked up by this prestigious organization. It is unknown if this was done for the lulz, but considering the "academy" was created by a bunch of old men and women, it probably was for not HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT WAS.

  • navgtr – The "academy" that now hosts this series.

NC17 Productions

NC17 Productions,
AKA "Kenny"

Quick, think of the worst traits both the AVGN and the Irate Gamer had to offer throughout their angry reviews. Constant beverage jokes that were funny only to them? Piss poor research on [insert video game here]? Shitty special effects that somehow involve blowing video game cartridges up out of sheer rage? Constant “what the fuck?!” whining in pitifully shrill yells?

Now imagine all of these wonderful gimmicks plus moar being found in one balding unoriginal fatty who does all of his video game reviews in his sole set of pajamas. That's NC17, or "Kenny" to the Internet (he doesn't like using his real name), whom unlike what his name suggests, covers absolutely nothing that has to do with NC-17 material. He reviews really old Nintendo games that nobody gives a shit about instead. Because that's what you think of when you think of the NC-17 tag: Nintendo games. This shrieking Nerd-copycat loves playing those shitty games that he clearly didn't grow up with, failing at them for 'comedic effect' to then call them a fucking pile of cowabu- piece of do- shit due to them not being easy enough, just like how Chris Bores likes it.

Kenny adores rage-quitting the Internet a lot, just like many camwhores before him, saying that he'll leave the Internet forever only to come back and say that he did it for the lulz. He also makes constant AVGN nods not unlike Alexander4488 in his reviews, like hating on LJN (LJN?!) simply because James does, constantly drinking Diet Pepsi and water in order to carry on through the pain of playing an NES game (because beer would be too much to handle for this chump) and make a lot of AVGN references to other NES games James had previously reviewed. "This reminds me of Karate Kid!" "This reminds me of the Ghostbusters!" "This reminds me of shitty assholes!" Kenny also has no problem with copying Chris Bores' complaints about a little game called Ghosts 'n Goblins word for word. (From 1:07 to 2:39)

Here are some examples of NC-17's 'reviews' just to show how much of a carbon copy of the AVGN and Chris Bores this baldy fat fuck is. Did we mention he was bald?

NecroVMX

NecroVMX

Not the most insane of YouTube reviewers, but a tool nonetheless. Thinks that AVGN is hilarious and considers his style to be like that of MST3K, this fine gentleman sits on his ass all day and plays quality video games for the amusement of his subscribers.

When he's not telling everybody how wrong they are for not liking what he does (seriously, if he makes a video of something he likes it nearly always starts out with him saying how wrong you are if you don't like it), he regales his viewers with witty commentary that amounts to little more than acting like he has tourettes by shouting out classics like "ASS!" and "TITS!" on a near constant basis. If a game requires you to enter a name, he shows maturity by naming the character in question Assy. On rare occasions he'll make a video featuring his girlfriend Julee in voice only, having her review it as well. Because, as we all know girls are comedy gold.

When he's not making videos showing his amazing gaming abilities, he'll make vlogs detailing;

  • 1) The GameCube game(s) that he's purchased from GameStop while sitting in his room which, at all times, is so messy that one wonders if he ever cleans it.
  • 2) Rarely, he'll make one where he rambles about comic books and how Green Lantern is awesome.
  • 3) Show us his collection of James Bond novels for no real reason other than to appear cool and manly.

He will also, from time to time, do specials on game series, where in he'll ramble for several videos about the history of the games in question, play every single fucking game in the series or, in a show of maximum sadness, do both. Such notable series include Final Fantasy, Donkey Kong and the Wario games.

Nintega / Dave Medina / Revolucionzation

File:Nintega in his original form..png
Every fagstack needs a solid foundation to build itself upon.

A total fucking piece of shit, it changes account names often after being banned reborn time and again. On reviews it often booms its eardrum destroying voice into the mic at what seems like impossible decibels. It often tries to ride the coattails of other cock smokes like lukemorse1, MagusX1, and Bibleteen. Sometimes it will present reviews in drag, which makes pinpointing the creatures exact sexuality impossible without hands on scientific research in a lab. Last Tuesday it was caught red-handed stalking another dumb bitch. When not cruising for a piece of man ass, stalking ugly cunts, or murdering ears on YouTube, it spends its spare time getting banned from multiple game related forums, then crying about it on YouTube like it was a fucking epic tragedy. Lets not forget it crying about how many times it gets cunt punted for being such a unfunny dumb dramatic bitch, because it thinks the world needs to know its a victim, for being a fat asshole, always and shit. The claim of crimes committed against it appear to be endless.

Moar recently, Dave (in true SilentRob and Chris-chan fashion) has decided to edit this ED article with over seventy edits so far (check out the history tab) either BAAAALLETING it totally, or finally figuring it out that any EDiot can revert his edits with just one click, deciding to replace his title pic with his own self-approved version to make him look slightly less of a whale, alongside some girl in deep depression of being within the vicinity of young David.

Even moar recently, Dave, under his Agetnin account here, has managed to do an additional 50-something fucking edits to this page in less then 24 hours, adding and removing the entry above on jboypacman, among other things. Like all his other lulzless self-imposed e-warz, he couldn't stop the rage, until he finally came to terms with his bi-curious crush, giving jboypacman and his brother front billing, because hes a fixated cunt with a crazed hunger for their man meat. Fucking faggot.

Using his Ninetega account here he's also gone off on a tangent with his long-running lulzless e-warz with PC Engine Hell, and Tatsujincorp under his alt account Agetnin, by creating said equally unlulzy articles below.

Also to be noted, as of 2018 this fucking bruised cunt counted on his pics being lost to time after the great purge. However, no happy ending for Dave this time.

File:Pedobear confirmed?.png
Hide yo kids. For serious.
  • Soukyugurentai – If you wish untold amounts of pain upon your eyes and ears, view its most common YouTube channel.

The PissedOffVideoGamer

PissedOffVideoGamer

Rip-off of the Angry Video Game Nerd. A Russian immigrant, Uncle Fester look-a-like who is so unbelievably fat that he makes even Hellsing920 look spry and athletic by comparison. Pokes at things with a little stick, so that he doesn't have to go through the strenuous and difficult activity of actually standing up. Also mistakes multiple things for food. Closed down his account due to many YouTubers manning the harpoons and bracing themselves for impact. An account named PissedOffAngryGamer still has his Nintendo GameCube review up for public view. Oh, and did I mention that he is also fat? [4]. Despite his videos being old news, people still love to bring this forgotten waste of human flesh up every once in a while.

Riz Rave Reviews

Dan Rizzo

Dan Rizzo, a former game reviewer from Australia that reviewed crappy games and crappy movies about his homeland, who can't keep his mouth shut for five seconds unless he's spewing some sort of total bullshit from his fat wallaby fucking ass. After hearing about his feud with Spoony, TGWTG admins eventually decided to permaban him from the site, which caused an uproar with fans curious about their Aussie's sudden departure. Thus far, TGWTG's staff has not spoken out, leading to wild rumors and extended drama. It is speculated ThatAussieGuy got fired because of his lack of updates and just being a preening faggot, but seeing TGWTG fanboys have about as much rationality as a schizophrenic, this probably holds about as much weight as a starving Ethiopian. It's becoming even more obvious as of late, with Aussie leaving lulzy tags in his JewTube videos, copying someone's Contra gameplay video and dubbing over it like he's playing the game, and posting a trailer of utter hilarity claiming to tell all about TGWTG, only to puss out a day later.

And nothing of value was lost.

The Sega Kid

The Sega Kid

One of the first sorry souls to emerge from the Angry Video Game Nerd's womb, the Sega Kid epitomized everything that is wrong with video game reviewing on YouTube. In a banner of fail, the Sega Kid managed to piss off both haters of video game reviewers and the staunchest of rant-through supporters alike with his now infamous "reviews" of Mortal Kombat 3 and WWF No Mercy, among others. Due to this overwhelming amount of deserved hate, the Sega Kid released half the number of reviews he had dissing his haters for not understanding his well-refined humor and gaming expertise.

He has since retired and is now releasing videos commentating on professional wrestling.

  • monoxide1234455 – The account of the formerly-known Sega Kid. Remind him of this dark time...

Sizzler07 / VIB113

Sizzler07 / VIB113
A VIB hater who has spelling worse than VIB himself.

A basic-level troll who used the once-lambasted work of a fat 12-year-old asspie to mimic Chadwardenn, thus duping the easily-trolled video game reviewer community on YouTube.

He rose to unexpected fame and infamy after Armake21 bashed his "review" of Contra. As thousands watched this video, it spawned a frenzy of lulz not seen since the aforementioned Chadwardenn, as it took a fraction of the video game community months to figure out he merely re-uploaded someone else's work. Even today, most people will still say that Sizzler's work is authentic. With his purpose served, Sizzler07 closed his account, serving the lulz with minimal effort, but with great honor.

  • sizzler07 – His now defunct account.
  • VIB113 The account of the person who actually did those reviews. Baleeted!

theSuperRobotSoujaOG

theSuperRobotSoujaOG

This fat KFC eating nignog reviews games in the same style as Spax3, but with more AIDS and fail. At least this faggot never sues people and talks about phone sex. He's also does let's plays and walkthroughs because this fat fuck has no life whatsoever. He's also a anime weeaboo who jacks off to Tea Gardner from You-Gay-Ho! Babs Bunny from Tiny Toon Adventures.

He now a transwoman faker, now he is called NOW Lina Artemis as of 2022

Tatsujin / Tatsujincorp / Cyrill Koller

Cyrill Koller/ Tatsujincorp. Those fingers are begging to be broken.

Here is another TurboGrafx-16 fanboy faggot. Unlike PC-ENGINE HELL, this butt-fucker is a hardcore weeaboo made of all sorts of AIDS and fail. He loves to brag to random people about how he has every single damn game in the Japanese PC Engine library as if anybody with a life gives a fuck. He happens to have quite a temper too, as he treats some of his loyal fans like shit on his JewTube channel. Easily someone you would love to shove into a high school locker.

Undercoverfilmer00v

Undercoverfilmer00v

Skyscraper-high egotistical and batshit insane YouTube reviewer who was best known for reviewing games with a paper bag over his head and released epic 45-minute reviews analyzing every aspect of the game. He went to film school, so he fancied himself far superior than any other reviewer out there, even the AVGN. He was so egotistical that he compared his reviews to "works of film". He also released a series of level run-throughs showing his gaming skill playing GoldenEye 007 with no weapons on 007 mode.

After a lulzless e-war with AkewsticRockR, the Undercoverfilmer put his page on lockdown and hasn't released anything since, constantly bashing his fanbase in the process. Was last seen sperging on Facebook before he deleted his account there as well.

See also


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Featured article July 14 and 15, 2015
Preceded by
Andrew Anglin
Video Game Reviewers Succeeded by
Jared Fogle