The Simpsons
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BREAKING NEWS!! Apu will no longer be in the show as poo in the loo find him offensive, unlike shitting in the street |
Once one of the lulziest shows ever to lulz the lulz on television, it's now considered an old meme and generally shitty. True hXc fans claim the quality dropped off after the ninth season or when Matt Groening stole all of the non-shitty writers to work on Futurama, leaving The Simpsons at the mercy of Mike Scully and Fox network executives dead set on whoring the show out long past the point of being profitable and franchise becomes a walking poster child for shows that should have been euthanized.
The Simpsons was created by Russian descendent and Communist Matt Groening for The Tracy Ullman Show back in late 1980s, after turning down a chance to animate his shitty Life in Hell when it became apparent that he would lose all rights to "[his] life's work" if he took the deal. So he decided to create a new property that satirized the Midwestern middle class family: mom, dad, three kids, dog and cat stereotype we've all seen for years. Despite only being a minute long, The Simpsons was soon spun-off after The Tracy Ullman Show was canceled for sucking. The Simpsons would then go on to the FOX network which at the time was the channel you still needed to put foil flags on your TV antenna to watch.
A little known fact, however, is that Matt Groening actually built a time machine and traveled at least 100 years into the future. There, he saw a rerun of the smash animated series Family Guy, which means that it's The Simpsons that stole the idea, instead of the other way around.
Characters
The Simpsons
Other people
- Ned Flanders: The Simpsons' Bible-thumping christfag neighbor who is completely oblivious to the fact that Homer despises him. Known for his tendency to add strange gibberish words to the end of his sentences.
- Abraham Simpson: Homer's senile, piece of shit dad and World War II veteran.
- Seymour Skinner: Principal of Springfield Elementary, Vietnam veteran, and basement dweller, as he still lives with his ancient mother.
Edna KrabappelLOL DEAD: Bart's MILF teacher. Was mostly around to serve as the cruel teacher stereotype as well as obligatory hot older woman.- Milhouse Van Houten: Contrary to popular belief, Milhouse is not a meme. He is actually a completely pointless character who serves as nothing more than Bart's dorky, incompetent buttbuddy.
- Montgomery Burns: Homer's 100-year-old Jew boss who exists only to drive the greedy old Kike image into our collective skulls.
- Waylon Smithers: Mr. Burns' bitch, adopted son and gay lover who molests him in his sleep.
- Comic Book Guy (Powerword: Jeffrey Albertson): Fat fuck who runs the local comic book store. Basically just sits around being fat.
- Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Yet another racist stereotype, this one running the local convenience store and has over 9,000 children.
- Moe Szyslak: A bartender who often tries to become an hero, but always fails miserably. Homer and his buddies desperately try to keep him alive so he can continue to get them drunk off their asses everyday.
- Nelson Muntz: A bully at school that often treats Bart and Milhouse the same way as Chris Brown treats Rihanna. Infamous for his annoying ass laugh.
- Ralph Wiggum: The mentally retarded kid in Lisa's class. Quoted by other retarded second graders oti.
- Frank Grimes: One time character and the only man to see Homer for what he is; a fat, stupid, lazy, destructive leech on society. He tries to expose him, but everyone for that one episode is too fucktarded to understand. Then he thinks he's Homer Simpson and accidentally kills himself.
- Krusty the Clown: TV clown who stars in his own show despite being a washed up, unfunny Jew.
- Sideshow Bob: Krusty's sidekick until he framed him for robbery. Bart exposed him and he now tries to kill the little bastard every chance he gets (basically every other episode).
- A bunch of other fucktards not worth mentioning here.
The Show
The show used to make fun of a variety of subjects, from celebrities, politics, the media and everything in between. It also showed kids as screaming, back-talking hellions or emo jazz obsessed girls, which caused parental groups and George Bush's dad to boycott the show on account of the fact that it was a bad influence on children.
The show isn't funny at all, and its fanbase above the age of 13 only like it because they were brought up with it, and when these pubic hairs on society die, so will The Fucking Simpsons.
It was also notable for celebrities (as if Jon Lovitz and Tracey Ullman were famous) to voice characters on the show that poked fun at the person in real life. Currently, celebrities just show up because it's expected of them, since the show's writers have lost any skill at crafting a plotline and now queef out illogical episodes that feature celebrities walking across the screen for no fucking reason, usually not even saying anything. The show has been unfunny for a number of years now, due to a severe lack of lulz, since ironically enough, when they made Homer Simpson into "Jerk-Ass Homer", whatever the fuck that is (a term used to describe Homer's behavior since season nine), fans stopped laughing at Homer's antics and became very uncomfortable with them, as far as Homer becoming an unfunny sociopath/retard (the worst sin a writer can commit, since sociopaths are supposed to be lovable scamps that the viewers want to hug the evil out of, like Dexter or House).
Online reviews of The Simpsons
As is common with the pseudo-intellectual manchildren of the online community, they enjoy spending their time discussing about how much more enjoyable cartoons and other television programs used to be during their pathetic childhoods, however no show is a greater source of butthurt than The Simpsons. Online reviewers with nothing better to do will regularly critique every new episode of The Simpsons that airs, despite that every review written by these uncreative broken records is the exact same thing (like every episode of The Simpsons in recent years), which consists of comparing it to an episode from the fag era followed by a statement saying that it's still not complete brain damaging garbage, even though the only fucktards who still watch this crap are white trash, young nigglets, faggots and nostalgic spicks who just refuse to grow the fuck up, so any claims that the show is still remotely lulzy are pretty much bullshit spewed from critics bribed with Fox's jewgold.
Numerous young retards can often be found arguing on forums, chats and on Jewtube comments where they will immediately show their distaste with the nostalgiafags by making factual declarations about how the show is still "better than Xenu" and how it's the only thing in their pathetic lives that they still look forward to, ensuring that this pathetic franchise continues on for many years to come so long as young little shit-stains continue to be spawned.
Bart Simpson, Scientologist
On January 28, 2009, Nancy Cartwright decided it would be a great idea to infringe copyrights and endanger her contract with Fox by calling up Los Angeles locals to promote a Scientology event by using the voice of Bart Simpson in hopes that it would draw in many young retards into her UFO cult. She used colloquialisms like "man!", "ay! carumba!" and laughing in the most retarded fashion imaginable. Like the brain damaged woman that she is, Nancy once donated her soul and personal savings to $cientology. Nancy makes nearly $17,000,000/year from talking into a mic and doesn't want Xenu to take her vocal chords. It happened to Isaac Hayes: It could happen to you.
The Simpsons and Playboy
As a bold move to attract a younger male audience, and after three years of gut-wrenching subscriber losses, Hugh Heffner decided that it was time to totally shift gears and appeal to the lonely nerd demographic. By obvious process of elimination, the scientists at the Bunny Laboratories came to the conclusion that only one desperate damsel could put them back at the top: Marge Simpson.
Designed to target a core group of 18-24 year olds, the November issue of Playboy magazine features Marge Simpson as not only the covergirl but also as the centerfold. Pity the Playboy models passed over by this blue-haired bitch who is not only one of the ugliest characters in the history of animated sitcoms, but also has a voice that makes Fran Drescher✡ sound pleasant and the cup size of a middle school girl. But one question does remain: Does the carpet match the drapes? In a world where yellow skin is the norm and protruding head spikes constitute a style, it honestly wouldn't be much of a surprise if they did.
What Playboy failed to notice is that there already exists a large quantity of Simpsons porn, courtesy of Drawn-Sex.com, for all of those out there who (For whatever reason) want to see Marge stabbing Homer in the ass with a pair of scissors. So don't shell out your hard-earned cash for a couple of professionally-drawn nudes of a yellow pussy, there's literally thousands of porn sites with Simpsons porn far better than what Playboy could ever make. Why Playboy even continues to exist is a mystery that has baffled mankind since the dawn of the Internet.
Galleries
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A message from The Simpsons. Poor faggy Smithers. -
What many hope for. -
How the minds of blind fanboys works. -
It once even spawned its own sect of costumed furfags... -
... which led to The Simpsons falling prey to the Furluminati.
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Homer falls prey to Marge's trap. -
Marge's hot body. -
Some weird shit of Bart committing suicide. -
This is what happens when you get The Lord of the Rings fans to draw Simpsons porn.
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God, look at Lisa's sexy ass. -
Nothing better than a Marge's 3D titties swinging around. -
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See also
- Arthur - The longest running children's cartoon.
- Bart Gets The Burdizzo
- Family Guy - Ripoff.
- Futurama - A better show.
- Lisa is a Vegan
- Old meme
- Rule 34
- SpongeBob SquarePants - Yet another cartoon that is long past its prime.
- Unfunny
Memes the series has spawned
When a TV show has more than 36 seasons it's bound to create some memes.
- 27
- Bart the General
- Dental Plan
- GET OUT BART IM PISS
- I, for one, welcome our new X overlords
Milhouse- MY EYES! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!
- Nod Flenders
- Sneed's Feed & Seed
- Spider Pig
- Steamed Hams
- Won't you think of the children!
External links
- Viewing Simpsons porn in Australia gets you sent to jail.
- Man goes to jail over porn of The Simpsons in Britain. - At least England knows how to deal with sick fucks.
- "Stupid sexy Flanders."
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The Simpsons is part of a series on Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage. |
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Not to be confused with Animu |
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| Featured article May 7 & 8, 2013 | ||
| Preceded by Radiohead |
The Simpsons | Succeeded by Skullgirls |