Pulse Nightclub Massacre
The FBI has offices around the world and can be contacted around the clock, every day of the year. |
BREAKING NEWS!! Omar got BTFO by Stephen Paddock! His High Score only lasted 15 months! |
Omar Mateen | |
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Born | November 16, 1986 |
Died | June 12, 2016 (aged 29) |
Nationality: | Afghan-Americunt |
Occupation | Professional party crasher |
Highscore | Killed 49, injured 58 |
Top 50? | 5th |
Style | FPS, Single player |
An Hero? | No; Killed In Action |
Motive(s) | Gay Guilt, Jihad Express, Homophobia |
After a stale year lacking any notable an heroes or rampage killers, 29-year-old Americunt badass Omar Mir Seddique Mateen☪ rose to the occasion and went for the High Score. He did this by hastily buying himself two guns and teaching those filthy fucking faggots a lesson by turning the Pulse Gay Nightclub in Orlando, Florida into a bloodbath where the fags catch bullets instead of AIDS. He trained for his upcoming massacre by playing Kill The Faggot for hours on end, because video games can help train you to kill. He proved once and for all to the fudge packers that safe spaces are a total facade. 49 dead poo-stabbing degenerate sinners later, and he has shot his way into the history books with the deadliest mass shooting in American history until the 2017 Las Vegas Shooting, and caused a Category 5 Shitstorm for the glory of Allah and for great justice. After a while, numerous investigations revealed that Omar had an extensive history of practicing homosexuality throughout his life.
Assault
— Omar Mateen, to the police |
After entering his gay bar of choice (filled with 320 flaming fags) to take a relaxing break from his stressful life, the shooter was greeted to the sight of the guy in the picture to the left. Filled with disgust and anger over his lover no longer requiring his services, our hero was boiling with wrath sent straight from the merciful and most peaceful lord Allah! Armed with an assault rifle and pistol, he quickly fired off dozens of shots, going on to injure or kill at least 100 people over the course of three hours. He barricaded himself in the gay bar and took some other people hostage. Over a hundred cops were called to the scene, and eventually, a SWAT team swarmed the premises and quickly neutralized the perpetrator. During the bloodbath cleansing, Omar was constantly heard taunting the victims and laughing hysterically, especially against the fags trying to escape. Omar was reported to have been wearing "some type of device", likely a suicide belt homemade clock.
During the attack this guy actually called 911 (The Police) and swore allegiance to ISIS. One of the people escaping the club barricaded the door to keep the killer from escaping, while simultaneously preventing other club-goers from escaping! Sadly, he couldn't survive his * * * * * star wanted level and quickly lost a gunfight against 11 cops/pigs, but he did score a headshot against one; sadly, said pig was wearing a kevlar helmet and survived the gunshot. 30 fags who were held hostage were freed. It is said the sounds of the cell phones of the dead ringing, their family's calling to check on them, was almost deafening. The only thing more disturbing was all of the dried jizz-capped turds lying next to the deceased after evacuating their bowels.
Loadout
Aftermath
The massacre was called an "act of domestic terrorism" by the county sheriff. Over fifty people were shipped off to the local hospital — each surrounded by half a dozen crying friends looking sexy as fuck and in need of a consolatory hug kiss blowjob — providing a nightmare for the already over-worked employees there. Thanks a lot, jerk! A furfag lied and pretended one of their friends was killed during the shooting, which caused a moderate amount of drama in the furry scene; go raid and troll his Fur Affinity account and stir up some drama for the lulz!
The shooting caused 103 casualties, with 50 total queers losing their lives (including Omar), making it the deadliest mass shooting in the history of Dumbfuckistan, and the deadliest incident of violence against fags / LGBT "people" in the history of America as well.
This event caused significantly large amounts of butthurt and drama, triggering the fuck out of Liberals and Fags. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama flat out refused to denounce the shooter or point out the fact that he was a radical muslim and his dad had ties to the Taliban. Due to the enabling of terror and the incompetence of the modern leftist americans, this event went on to significantly boost the support that The Donald has, especially from a good chunk of the LGBT community, who are fueling the gun industry by buying out as many guns as they can to defend themselves. Obviously, most fags are retarded pedophile freaks, but some of them are smart enough to pack some heat along with fudge.
Obviously, the massacre caused 99% of the leftists to call for greater gun control. After all, if there hadn't happened to be a Gun Free Zone at the bar and the fags were allowed to pack some heat, this guy would've been taken out in a heartbeat, and then there would be nothing to whine about. Even moar drama occurred after fags across tried to donate blood to the victims, but due to bans on gay donations (Due to aids), it has the potential to prevent some lives from being saved. A lot of the cops were ashamed of themselves for taking 3 fucking hours to breach the location and neutralize a single shooter; Even Columbine was only 1/4th as deadly and it only took the cops like.... 2 hours to make a move.
The Eiffel Tower in France lit up with the rainbow colors of the pride flag. Everyone in the world either cried like little bitches (First world) or laughed their ass off at the shooting and praised the shooter (Third World) and laughed or sighed at yet ANOTHER mass shooting in Dumbfuckistan. A fag pride group called Equality Florida, raised over 3.5 million dollars within days of the massacre. A scammer group called @PulseOrlandoUSA raised 30 dollars in Bitcoin supposedly to give cookies and bottled water to the weepy survivors before the Twitter Police shut them down. Both charities feel very proud of themselves for their efforts. Out of all of this shit, not one person managed to give a shit about the chick that got gunned down the day before.
List of Faggots Pwned
As you can tell, most of these filthy cocksuckers were spics; thus, Uncle Omar has proposed a practical solution to the logistics problem that Making America Great Again might entail.
Perpetrator, Omar Mateen
The gunman was identified as Omar Mir Seddique Mateen, a 29-year-old homosexual Afghan-American (from New York lol) who had ties to radical Islam. Unfortunately, our hero will probably never be remembered for his valiant efforts, due to not being a disturbed upper-middle-class white beta-male autist from the suburbs. At least he will get to enjoy 72 tight-assed virgins which is more than Pulse had to offer. And he won't even get AIDS!
According to the kuffar bitch who broke his heart when he busted her face, Omar was a loving husband who only beat her on days ending in Y and only over big things, like her inability to be a good little waifu like the Quran commanded. She couldn't stick with the rule of "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best," and ran back home to Daddy, leaving Omar with memories and her subscription to al-Shamikha. He decided to fill the hole she left in his life by working with kids (lol, srsly) praying to Mecca and regularly massaging his prostate. He was interviewed by the FBI before this, for sending them mean tweets.
He claimed that his uncle was Osama Bin Laden. A perfect role model.
Before working as a rent-a-cop, aka security guard for a company called "G4S", this homo-killer was hanging out with the homos in their places of worship, the gym, gay bars, and Grindr. He also worked in the gayest of all the gay stores, GNC. Omar was a very special boy, always wearing the same shirt with his name, in case he forgot.
His lust for men has even been confirmed by the FBI. And other news outlets.
Dismissal from Criminal Justice Training
Sometime in 2007 while training to become a prison guard, (so that he could visit his gay and terrorist friends and still have a job) Omar decided to make a joke right after Cho Seung Hui's massacre at Virginia Tech.
—Omar Mateen |
This and him actually sleeping in class and being absent was enough to get kicked out. Not that G4S checked this, and just let him in, meaning that anyone can become a security guard, even you.
Note from the editor: We do not mean to suggest by this that G4S is in any way substandard as a security company. They are the world leader, and in capitalism, any company that is not the leader is outlawed. Besides, they spun off all their worst rejects to the Geo Group to run America's private prisons. At least Omar could handle a gun and maintain a gay social media presence.
List of Known or Confirmed Aliases
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Quotes
Previous Quote | Next Quote |
Transcript - As edited by FBI
What follows is directly from the FBI. Apparently FBI is under the assumption that if you say the name of omitted three times in a row, you'll summon him, like he was fucking Beetlejuice or something.
Orlando Police Dispatcher (OD)
Shooter (OM)
OD: Emergency 911, this is being recorded.
OM: In the name of God the Merciful, the beneficial [in Arabic]
OD: What?
OM: Praise be to God, and prayers as well as peace be upon the prophet of God [in Arabic]. I let you know, I’m in Orlando and I did the shootings.
OD: What’s your name?
OM: My name is I pledge of allegiance to [omitted].
OD: Ok, What’s your name?
OM: I pledge allegiance to [omitted] may God protect him [in Arabic], on behalf of [omitted].
OD: Alright, where are you at?
OM: In Orlando.
OD: Where in Orlando?
[End of call.]
WBC Strikes Back
The Westboro Baptist Church, continuing with their traditions of mocking mass shootings and deceased gays, came out to protest against the victims of the attack and riled up another mini-shitstorm.
Seddique Mir Mateen
Omar's daddy, Seddique, was recently spotted at a Hillary Clinton rally. Old media quickly rushed to silence the story, and only some brave stoned slackers from Pol/ could get the job done. Even Google is censoring any negative Hillary search terms, probably because they're getting paid millions of dollars by the Clinton foundation.
Videos
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Gallery
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Selfie from Myspace.
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Confirmed Hillary voter.
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Gun Free Zones just work!
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Irony.. LOL
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Omar channelling Robert Barone
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Hillary must be so proud.
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doom wad
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Reactions from the international Muslim community.
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lulzy sh00p
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Some of you fags are pretty cool. Don't go to Pulse tomorrow fam.
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Trolls try to frame Sam Hyde. Lol.
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Anon describes how he got such a high kill count.
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Live news feeds
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Party hard in Orlando.
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DEADLIEST MASSACRE EVAR!!!1
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Current state of the liberal brain.
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John Oliver being a faggot.
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In his early years.
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Triggered IRL
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Omar's hot load in your face, bitch.
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Omar as a rare Pepe.
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A gay nigga prepares for the oncoming shitstorm.
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Liberal faggots trying to ban ARs. Again.
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Some liberal faggot gets TRIGGERED HARD!
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Trump is practically guaranteed to win now.
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Tumblr bitch gets triggered hard.
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Part 2
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A terrorist muslim tries to manipulate the goyim.
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Trump's tweets during the initial massacre.
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Asking for it? Challenge accepted!
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When your wife looks like this, no wonder you hit up gay clubs.
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Luis "Hold the Door" Burbano
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GAME OVER
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Stripped down to search for bombs.
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Or maybe he was getting one last blowjob in the bathroom like the faggot he was.
IRL Faggot of the Year 2016
Kill count: | 49/20 Gay rage can be used to create something beautiful. |
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Accuracy: | 10/20 Just went in and spammed shit like a faggot. |
Style: | 18/20 Midnight assault, hostage-taking, and ISIS pledge; hyper lulz. |
Butthurt: | 20/20 Media torn between defending gays and being pro-Islam. |
Bonus: | 20/20 A Muslim killing fags & High Score (in America), generating a legendary shitstorm! |
Theme Song
I'm a fag killer and I'm here to say: You'd better get running if you are gay. I may hate bitches and talk a lot of shit, But hey motherfucker I'll never suck dick!
Then sitting around dreaming about another man's tool. But don't worry faggot I'll kill you with class, I'll clean my machete and shove it up your ass!
Slitting their throats while they drink their boyfriends pee. All I want to do is put my mind at ease; By getting rid of the faggots and killing this disease!
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Hate fags, the answer's yesMy words are like a dagger with a jagged edge That'll stab you in the head, whether you're a fag or lez Or a homosex, hermaph or a trans-a-vest Pants or dress, hate fags? The answer's yes Homophobic? Nah, you're just heterophobic Staring at my jeans, watching my genitals bulgin' That's my motherfuckin' balls, you'd better let go of 'em They belong in my scrotum, you'll never get hold of 'em! |
50 Faggot Post
Bonus Level
Shortly after the completion of the Orlando massacre level, a 20-year-old "man" named James Wesley Howell (pictured right) was caught by cops near the location of the LA Pride festival in west Hollywood. Numerous weapons and explosives were found in his car. The pigs are too dumb to figure out a motive, but it should be painfully obvious that he was the butt buddy of Omar and was planning on another genocide crusade. Just look at the fucker.
A CHALLENGER APPEARS!
A sequel to the Pulse Nightclub Massacre ensued on July 25th, 2016, when some copycat shitlord tried to outdo Omar Mateen's High Score in another mass shooting at a gay bar in Florida, pwning 2 faggots and injuring another 16 moar.
This event further proves how great it is to live in Florida.
See Also
If you have been offended or triggered in any way by this article, go fuck yourself, and please take the liberty of killing yourself too, you faggot.
- Anders Behring Breivik
- Anderson Lee Aldrich - Another fag killer.
- Cho Seung-Hui - Whose record he beat as top shooter in the USA.
- Florida - Where it all went down.
- Gun control - Prepare your anus.
- Hero - What he is.
- High Score - What the man is now on!
- Kill The Faggot - In video game form.
- Pulse Faggot
- Sam Hyde
Similar Incidents
- Aurora Theatre Shooting
- Dallas Sniper Attacks
- Fort Hood
- 9/11
- Las Vegas massacre
- Boston Marathon Bombing
- Munich Massacre
- Reina Nightclub Massacre
- San Bernardino shooting
- Sandy Hook Elementary Massacre
- Virginia Tech shooting
External Links
- News article (archive)
- Pol thread (archive)
- Fur Affinity account of a furfag who pretended to have been murdered in the attack. (archive)
- Luis "Hodor" Burbano's IMDB page. He's an "actor". (archive)
- V-tech massacre connection. lol. (archive)
- Petition to put Luis "Hodor" Burbano in jail. (archive) Let's get those numbers up there!
- FBI crap flooded with tips. (archive) If you see something, say something.™ (Protip: Something = Muslim)
- Jamaica dun had enuf of this maama man chichi flag. (archive)
- Ivory Coast gays express condolences, get pwned. (archive)
- Gospel of LULZ from Pastor Steven Anderson. (archive) Full Version too hot for jewtube.
- Triggered faggot begs skiddies to DDOS Ed for this page. Snitch him out to the feds :) (archive)
- Revenge on Puerto Ricans for giving Mateen the AIDs. (archive)
Youtube
- Survivor describes how Mateen spared Blacks, killed others.
- Pastor Steven Anderson responds to jewtube censorship. YOU KNOW HE'S RIGHT.
- More Epic LULZ from Pastor Anderson.
- LGBTQs declare war on Steven Anderson. It's on sodomites!
Entertainment at the Pulse. Fake autofellatio at 9:20.LOL Removed
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