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Bidoof

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Bidoof, the plump mouse Pokémon (also known as the unwanted Pokémon), is a Normal-type Pokémon from the Diamond, Pearl and Platinum games, known for its extreme ubiquitousness. It is literally impossible to go anywhere in those games without Bidoof's derpy face belming out of the long grass at you at every turn. By the end of the game, you will doubtless have encountered so many of the ugly little brown bastards that you will be fucking sick of them.

A wild Bidoof appears... No, wait, come back! Please!
You will never be anyone's favorite Pokémon.

Nobody likes Bidoof.

HM Whore

Despite being common as shit and next to fucking useless, Bidoof are nevertheless frequently captured by Pokémon trainers for one reason - Bidoof are able to learn a large number of the HMs, hidden moves that allow players to pass through certain areas of the game world.

As such, most trainers will usually have a Bidoof with a moveset entirely composed of HMs, that will be brought out as and when they are needed, before being shoved back into the PC box and forgotten about at the earliest opportunity like an ugly, unwanted child.

 
Bidoof patiently waiting for its master in the PC box at the Pokémon Center.
 
He deserves it.

The HM moves Bidoof can learn are as follows:

HM moves Bidoof cannot learn include:

Bidoof Videos





Bidoof Facts

  • Bidoof evolves into Bibarel.
  • Bidoof's nose is actually a muffin.
  • Bidoof is the favorite Pokémon of noted guido and infamous Chris-chan troll, Clyde Cash.
  • It is possible to determine the gender of a Bidoof by seeing how fluffy its tail is. Another way is to turn it over and see if it has a penis and some balls or a vagina.
  • Nobody will ever trade you anything for a Bidoof.
  • Bidoof's German name is 'Biber'.
  • Bidoof cries itself to sleep at night.

Smogon Are Scared of Bidoof

With the introduction of the Dream World in Pokémon Black and White, all of the Pokémon in the game recieved a new ability - in Bidoof's case, Moody.

Little did anybody realize that, in doing so, they had created a monster and that the humble dopey-looking Bidoof would soon wreak havoc all across the Pokémon world...

   
 
Moody causes the Pokémon to raise one of its stats by two stages, while another stat is lowered by one stage at the end of each turn. These stats include accuracy and evasion. Moody will not attempt to lower a stat at -6 or attempt to increase a stat at +6.
 

 
 

—Bulbapedia on Moody. If you understood any of that, then congratulations on retaining your virginity for life.

In their tireless mission to enforce unnecessary rules and eradicate fun from a children's video game about brightly colored battling monsters, Smogon almost had to ban Bidoof from competitive play, so terrified were they of their teams getting curbstomped by a cute little beaver.

See Also

 

Bidoof
is part of a series on Pokémon

[Gotta catch ’em all!Who’s that Pokémon?]
 
A FUCKING POKEMON
Abra
 
Aggron
Aggron
 
Alakazam
Alakazam
 
Bidoof
Bidoof
 
Blastoise
Blastoise
 
Braixen
Braixen
 
Charizard
Charizard
 
Cloyster
Cloyster
 
Ditto
Ditto
 
Empoleon
Empoleon
 
Empoleon
Espeon
 
Garchomp
Garchomp
 
Gardevoir
Gardevoir
 
Hypno
Hypno
 
Jynx
Jynx
 
Jigglypuff
Jigglypuff
 
Kadabra
Kadabra
 
It's a Kirby, retard
Kirby
 
Koffing
Koffing
 
Lanturn
Lanturn
 
Cunnilingus
Lickitung
 
Lopunny
Lopunny
 
Lucario
Lucario
 
Lugia
Lugia
 
Metapod
Metapod
 
Mewtwo
Mewtwo
 
Mistystuffer
Misty
 
Mudkip
Mudkip
 
Twitch Plays Pokemon
Omanyte
 
Pikaman
Pikaman
 
Pokemon Go
Pokémon Go
 
Swirlface
Poliwhirl
 
Porygon
Porygon
 
Primeape
Primeape
 
Probopass
Probopass
 
JustinRPG
Reshiram
 
Riolu
Riolu
 
FUCK_YEAH_SEAKING
Seaking
 
Shaymin
Shaymin
 
Shiny Pidgey
Shiny Pidgey
 
Slowpoke
Slowpoke
 
Smugleaf
Smugleaf
 
Snorlax
Snorlax
 
Snover
Snover
 
Squirtle
Squirtle
 
Suicune
Suicune
 
Vileplume
Vileplume
 
Xatu
Xatu
 
Zoroark
Zoroark