I'm so confused

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File:I is Confused.jpg

Confusion may lead to entangled knickers.

"I'm so confused" or rather "I'm like, soooooooooooooooo confused" is a common attention whoring tactic used by all teenage girls and gays over 9000 times in an internet year. It is used and abused as a lame way to excuse their violently stupid behavior or misunderstanding of the most simple of concepts, such as meaning what you say and saying what you mean. In other words, it is the perfect statement for girls who just have to have it both ways; it's a way to ask a stupid (or painfully obvious) question without the guilt of admitting that they're a fucking retard. Many cases of "confusion" surround pregnancy issues, resulting mostly in teen mothers.

Examples:

"Guys, I'm like so tired and unhealthy. I've been like trying to lose some weight, so I eat about 500 calories a day. What should I do? I'm sooooooo confused!"

"I need $100 more to buy food for my babies, but I spent the last of my money to buy the new Gucci purse! What should I do? I'm SOOOOOO confused!!!"

"My teacher forces me to have sex with him after class, and I can't say no, or go to the police because he said if I do, he says that he will fail me!! WHAT DO I DO??? I'm soooo confused!"

"My BF and I did it w/o a condom and he pulled out but now I'm all fat and I haven't had my period in like eight months! Could I be pregnate?! im soooooooooooo confused!!!"

"I was, like, on the internet, and, like, this thing came up that said I won a laptop, and I clicked it, and I put in my name, address, phone number, PIN number, credit card number, social security number, and, like, my Windows CD key, and like, now, my computer doesn't worrrrk. Where's my laptop??? I'm, like, sooooo confused, guys!!"

"Guys, my only friend is about to leave me because I treat him like shit and only talk to my boyfriend who lives in another country. What should I do? I'm sooooooooo confused!"

"My boyfriend and I started getting serious, and he put his hand up my shirt. Now everyone will think I'm a slut! I'm soooooo confused!"

"Guys guys! i think i have a crush on rick astley is that normal? im not sure im soooooo confused!"

It gets Better . . .

	“	Dear Agony Aunts, This is going to sound so crazy...and I am completely embarassed to ask it but...Well, here it goes. My boyfriend and have been dating for almost a year now and we are very much in love...Also, he and I are highly sexually active. He has been more sexually active with me than any of his past relationships and visa versa...The thing is...I can't believe I'm asking this...He likes me to pee on him!!!!It started out on his feet,then his back and now.......his face.......He never likes to do it to me. Just me to him. I asked him about it but all he said was that anything coming out of me was hot....What does this mean about the way he feels about me? Why does he like me to do this?!?!?!?! I'm so confused! -Confused.	„
	—She claims to be between 22-25 years old. But also an Americunt.

To leave a polite suggestion go here.

	Mental illness & Disorders	Acrotomophilia • Addiction • Agoraphobia • Alcoholism • Alexis Pilkington Syndrome • Alzheimer's • Anorexia • Antisocial personality disorder • Anthropophobia • Anxiety • ADD • ADHD • Asperger's Syndrome • Autism • Bimbofication • Bipolar • Borderline personality disorder • Bug Chasing • Bulimia • Cognitive dissonance • Deep thinker • Depression • Dick Impalement • Down's Syndrome • Dyslexia • Eating disorder • Factitious disorder • Fake Schizophrenia • Fauxlimia • Feminism • Gender dysphoria • Girl on the Internet Syndrome • Heterophobia • Hero Complex • HFA • Histrionic Personality Disorder • Hutchence's Syndrome • Hyperbolimia • Inadequacy • Inconsistent personality disorder • Insanity • Liberal Butthurt Syndrome • Liberalism • Low Self-esteem • 'Missing White Woman' Syndrome • Multiple personality disorder • Napoleon Complex • Narcissistic personality disorder • Neurotypical • Obsessive Compulsive Disorder • Paranoia • Paranoid personality disorder • Peter Pan Syndrome • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder • Psychopathy • Pyromania • Retardation • Schizophrenia • Seasonal Affective Disorder • Self-diagnosis • Self Injury • Sexsomnia • Sickfuckery • Sociopathy • Social anxiety disorder • Special Snowflake Syndrome • Terminological percipience disorder • Trolling Induced Transsexuality Syndrome • Tulpa • Unrealistic expectations • Victim complex
	Fetishes:	Acrotomophilia • Aquaphilia • Arborphilia • Audiophilia • Autogynephilia • Balloon Fetish • Bestiality • Carmen Electra complex • Cross Dressing • Dollfilia • Emetophilia • Emosexuality • Eproctophilia • Fatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • Fetishism • Foot Fetish • Furniture Porn • Furrism • Goo girl • Guro • Heterophilia • Homophilia • Inflation Fetish • Japanophilia • Jungle Fever • Lesbian pedophilia • Lotion Play • Macrophilia • Maiesiophilia • Mechanophilia • Mpreg • Necrophilia • Objectophilia • Oedipial Complex • Paraphilia • Pedophilia • Plushophilia • Pregnant Loli • Pregnophilia • Quicksand Fetish • Rangerphilia • Spectrophilia • Statuephilia • Trichophilia • Voraphilia • Wet and Messy Fetishism • Wetlook • Xenophilia • Yellow fever • Zoophilia
	E-Psychosis:	Chronic Troll Syndrome • Deletionism • E-go • E-Psychiatrist • E-Psychiatry • ETD • Hivemind • I-Dosing • I have a 140 IQ • IRC Disease • Imaginary girlfriend • Internet Disease & Internet Disease Chart • Internet poverty delusions • Internet Rehab • Internet troll personality disorder • Mega ultra super genius • Nerdy Fandom Gateway Theory • Sex by association • Lulz-Blindness • Wikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases
	Experiments:	ask.fm • Brainwashing • Hypnosis • Milgram Experiment • Scientology • Stanford Prison Experiment • The Hivemind Corollary
	Sites:	Above Top Secret • B/ • Bodies Under Siege • CYOC • Chatroulette • Defense Industries Organization • Deeker • FoolQuest.com • InkBunny • Neuticles.com • Psyke.org • WarpMyMind.com
	See also:	American Psychiatric Association • Anger • ASMR • Child abuse • Conscience • Dreams • DSM • Elan School • Enlightenment • Intelligence • Lobotomy • Mary Bell • Psychiatristy • Serial Killers • Take the meat bridge • The Law of Conformity • Trigger Warning

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