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Read a book: Difference between revisions

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{{quote|Christians, why you ask stupid, rhetorical questions...is it because you're 2 lazy to '''read a science textbook?''' Do you know what a library is? Can you focus long enough to '''read a science textbook?''' Or does all your reading need to be in parable form like a child?}}[http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20111222001728AAfisGt The Smartest One Here], tenured professor of [[LOGIC AND REASON]] at Harvard University.
{{quote|Christians, why you ask stupid, rhetorical questions...is it because you're 2 lazy to '''read a science textbook?''' Do you know what a library is? Can you focus long enough to '''read a science textbook?''' Or does all your reading need to be in parable form like a child?}}[http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20111222001728AAfisGt The Smartest One Here], tenured professor of [[LOGIC AND REASON]] at Harvard University.
<center><youtube>GlKL_EpnSp8</youtube></center>




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* Ask them something along the lines of "which books would you suggest I read?" In most cases there will be no response as again, these people typically ''don't'' read.
* Ask them something along the lines of "which books would you suggest I read?" In most cases there will be no response as again, these people typically ''don't'' read.
* Tell them that using such trite and platiduninous 3rd rate witticisms is a testament to their ''own'' obvious stupidity.
* Tell them that using such trite and platiduninous 3rd rate witticisms is a testament to their ''own'' obvious stupidity.
* Use [[the internet is serious business|serious]], irrefutable [[fact]]s from [[wikipedia]](or better yet, good 'ol trusty and reliable [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]) and make an ass out of them. '''WARNING!''' This will almost invariably result in the [[pwnt]] accusing the pwner of having "[[No life]]."
* Use [[the internet is serious business|serious]], irrefutable [[fact]]s from [[Wikipedia]] (or better yet, good 'ol trusty and reliable [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]]) and make an ass out of them. '''WARNING!''' This will almost invariably result in the [[pwnt]] accusing the pwner of having "[[No life]]."
* If applicable(and usually, it is) [[grammar nazi|correct their spelling and grammar]]. Sit back and LOL as they then try to defend their errors and/or try to play them off as "[[typo]]s."
* If applicable (and usually, it is) [[grammar nazi|correct their spelling and grammar]]. Sit back and LOL as they then try to defend their errors and/or try to play them off as "[[typo]]s."
* .... [[NO U]]!!!!1!!!
* .... [[NO U]]!!!!1!!!


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* [[Gamer girl]]s
* [[Gamer girl]]s
* [[Atheists]]
* [[Atheists]]
* [[Social Justice Warrior]]s
* [[Feminist]]s
* [[Goths]]
* [[Goths]]
* [[Deep Thinker]]s
* [[Deep Thinker]]s
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== Types of people that ''don't'' read books ==
== Types of people that ''don't'' read books ==


* [[Niggers]]
* [[Niggers]] and the [[Coal burner|nigger lovers]] who voted for [[Obama]].
* [[H8r]]s
* [[H8r]]s
* [[Rednecks]]
* [[Rednecks]]
* [[Creationist]]s
* [[Creationist]]s
* [[Hipster]] science [[Ignorant|new fags]]
* [[Atheist]]s
* [[Christian]]s
* [[Christian]]s
* [[Chris Chan]] [[My Little Pony]] pop-up books don't count.
* [[Social Justice Warrior]]s
* [[Feminist]]s
* [[Muslim]]s (As 75% of them are illiterate)
* [[Muslim]]s (As 75% of them are illiterate)
* [[Guido]]s
* [[Guido]]s
* [[Spic|Mexicans]]
* [[Woman|Women]] Bitch don't need to read unless it's a recipe book on how to make me a sammich.
* [[Cooldude]]
* [[Cooldude]]
* [[Republican]]s
* [[Republican]]s
* [[Democrat]]s
* [[Politics|Third Party Candidates]]
* [[Ann Coulter]]
* [[Ann Coulter]]
* [[Amanda Todd]]
* [[Amanda Todd]]
* [[Doopie DoOver]] The fact that he's a High School dropout says books are this [[bitch|bitch's]] kryptonite.
* [[You]]
* [[You]]
* [[Your Mom]] Not a lot of time to read when she's going from job to job on her back.




== People Who Actually Need To Read A Book ==
[[Jew|Jewish Men]] {{Jew}} It's how we rule the world. 
*1: [[Jew]]s make reading look stupid.
*2: All races, except [[Jew]]s get dumber.  Because whites are now as slack jawed and stupid as [[nigger|other races]] they ask the  super smart Jews for their help because they can't  handle leading any more.
*3: Jews swoop in
*4: ???
*5: Profit


== See also ==
== See also ==
* [[Books]]
* [[Books]]
* [[Bookz]] (notice the "z")
* [[Bookz]] (notice the "z")
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{{books}}
{{books}}
{{language}}
{{language}}
{{timeline|Featured article October 13th & 14th, [[2015]]|[[Cyberviolence]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Underrepresentation]]}}

Latest revision as of 19:07, 30 July 2017

She wouldn't be regurgitating trite, witless insults if she'd only Read a Book!

A very common rote aphorism often made by pretentious pseudo-intellectuals, neckbeards, atheists, and other obviously stupid people desperately attempting to appear intelligent, "Read a Book" is an extremely banal retort, comeback, or insult that is ironically enough, made almost exclusively by people that don't read. At most, any reading that is done by these numbskulls is done in a perfunctory fashion and is done simply because their teachers or professors made them do so. Nontheless, this unfortunate fact does not prevent these poor misguided souls into parroting this mirthful mantra of the feeble minded whenever they're backed into a corner during a debate or whenever they simply want to feel intelligent.

Examples of erudition

It takes a certain special type of pretentious asshat to actually wear this cringeworthy rubbish.
   
“ 		 
Christians, why you ask stupid, rhetorical questions...is it because you're 2 lazy to read a science textbook? Do you know what a library is? Can you focus long enough to read a science textbook? Or does all your reading need to be in parable form like a child?
  		„
  		 

The Smartest One Here, tenured professor of LOGIC AND REASON at Harvard University.


Comebacks and tips for trolling

  • Ask them something along the lines of "which books would you suggest I read?" In most cases there will be no response as again, these people typically don't read.
  • Tell them that using such trite and platiduninous 3rd rate witticisms is a testament to their own obvious stupidity.
  • Use serious, irrefutable facts from Wikipedia (or better yet, good 'ol trusty and reliable Encyclopedia Dramatica) and make an ass out of them. WARNING! This will almost invariably result in the pwnt accusing the pwner of having "No life."
  • If applicable (and usually, it is) correct their spelling and grammar. Sit back and LOL as they then try to defend their errors and/or try to play them off as "typos."
  • .... NO U!!!!1!!!

Types of people that are dumb enough to actually use this adolescent cliche

Types of people that don't read books


People Who Actually Need To Read A Book

Jewish Men ✡ It's how we rule the world.

  • 1: Jews make reading look stupid.
  • 2: All races, except Jews get dumber. Because whites are now as slack jawed and stupid as other races they ask the super smart Jews for their help because they can't handle leading any more.
  • 3: Jews swoop in
  • 4: ???
  • 5: Profit

See also


Read a book
is part of a series on
Fuck reading. Just use Sparknotes.See Also
Read a book is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and Dialects • Grammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and Usage • Rhetorical Strategies • Poetry • The Politics of Language and Communication • Media • Visual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand
Featured article October 13th & 14th, 2015
Preceded by
Cyberviolence 		Read a book Succeeded by
Underrepresentation
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