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{{needsnomore|art of Dragoneer}}
[[File:DragoneersBrain.jpg|thumb|center|Let this set the precedent for the entire article.]]
[[Image:Sean_Piche.jpg|thumb|320px|NEW JERSEY (AP) — Engineers with Halliburton Corp. (NYSE: EVIL) have announced the formation of an exploratory well on the forehead of Sean Piche. One engineer was quoted as saying that a conservative estimate of the well's potential could be up to 100 million barrels of light fat-fuck crude. If this turns out to be the case, it could power the Internet for a couple of hours.]]
[[File:Seanpichedilbert.png|thumb|Sean Piche is one of the main characters in [[Dilbert]].]]
'''Dragoneer''' (a.k.a. '''The Dragoneer''', '''[[Fag]]oneer''', '''Preyfar''', '''Inkjammer''', '''[[powerword|Sean Piche]]''', or lately '''Princess Piche'''), born March 25, 1983, is a balding, morbidly obese 37 year old [[manchild]] [[lolcow]] who is the current owner and director of [[Furaffinity|FurAffinity.net]]. Dragoneer, as the CEO of furry, is stupid in ways that make typical bouts of furry drama look tame by comparison. He fucks up in ways that are inconceivable to anyone outside of the furry community, and end up being completely disastrous for anyone caught in them. Furthermore, his overarching laziness and sloth, inability to learn from his mistakes or even be honest has caused his online presence to be trailed by a conga line of goofs, gaffes, and controversies that will follow and haunt him (and anyone who associates with him) until the end of time.
Dragoneer’s fursona is based on a [[fanfiction|unique breed]] of [[Digimon]] called a Murasadramon, which is essentially some mutant hybrid of Guilmon and Exveemon combined into one abortion of an [[original character]]. Wikifur sources mention that a Murasadramon uses plasma and electrical-based attacks, but an [[EDiot]] research team was able to conclude the following [[fact|facts]] about this rare variety after many decades of [[autism|intense study]]. This species of Digimon can distract [[you|casual observers]] from it’s lack of a [[fat|proper diet]] and aversion to basic hygiene. It prefers the damp and dark microcosms of their parents basements where they dwell in solitude for several years, subsisting on a diet of Cheetos, Hot Pockets and Gatorade. They continue to live like this until they reach the late middle age state and move out to a single bedroom studio apartment. They often [[Anthrocon|migrate]] in large flocks to stand around in ceremonial displays of dominance where their collective body odour could suffocate an entire hotel lobby. A lot of the adult life of a Murasadramon involved being a massive fucking [[whore]], [[dicks everywhere]] doesn't even come close to describing how much porn there is of these creatures, there's almost as much porn of this one species of digimon as there is of [[Renamon]]... well alright not '''that''' much.
[[Image:Dickmastersonlulz.jpg|thumb|300px|Dick's iconic appearance on Dr. Phil]]
[[File:Dickmasterson.jpg|thumb|right|God among men]]
You want more information? [[RTFM|Read a fucking book]], just so you don't turn into this greasy, pious [[faggot|megafaggot]].
'''Dick Masterson''' (aka [[Powerword|Dax Herrera]]), is a messenger from [[God]] sent to [[troll|enlighten]] [[women]] around the world about why everything sucks [[this is why we can't have nice things|because of them]], and this consequently makes him the greatest human being alive. His [[Trolling IRL|IRL trolling]] is not only noteworthy for the [[lulz]] it has generated over the years, but the fact that so many fall for such obvious bait creates a weird meta-troll effect where he's proven right due to the hordes of butthurt bitches left in his path. His trolling never just stopped at pissing off wimminz though, motivated via the vindictive antics of [[Maddox|a certain former associate of his]], he took his trolling to new heights by engaging in some of the biggest [[shitpost]]s in his career, including entertaining [[Maddox#The_Biggest_Lolsuit_in_the_Universe_.28AKA:_George_Ouzounian_et_al_-_v._-_Dax_Herrera_et_al.29|Maddox's $380 million lolsuit]].
He is also a closet [[Babyfur]], and at one point his character and the character of his then-boyfriend appeared on the back cover of [[Softpaw Magazine]] as [[Pedobear|children in tight underwear]] and also in a unfinished comic (available in the gallery below). Of course, this minor fact is a constant source of hilarity for [[lulz]] connoisseurs and is a shameful past that Sean tries to hide at all costs. We still know he's beating it to cub, he's just so much of a phenomenal coward about it that he won't allow anyone on his platform to beat off on it too.
Dick Masterson is also a CalTech honors graduate with a doctorate in rocket science. [https://web.archive.org/web/20201112034052/http://ucbcomedy.com/user/16155 No, seriously!] [http://thedickshow.com/episode-48/ he actually talked about making rockets and drones that kill terrorists for his day job]. Sorry ladies, so much for him being a retard that doesn't have any clue what he is talking about. When a butthurt psychobitch snitched on him, writing to his family and employers to cut off his penis, it was soon revealed his employer could care less since rocket scientists weren't exactly commonplace, he kept doing whatever he wanted to, living his life like the drunken degenerate virgin king supreme.
He currently resides in [[yuppies|Northern Virginia]] in the Washington, D.C. area with other [[furries]].
So, women despise him, men and [[btard|/b/tards]] want to BE him, and [[troll]]s ''WISH'' they could be him. God bless you Dax Herrera, consider this ED article as your #1 fanpage.
==Personal Life==
==Early Career==
[[File:Dragoneerfat.jpg|thumb|left|If chairs could talk, this one would be begging for the sweet release of death just to escape being so close to this fat fuck's sweaty asshole.]]
===Website===
[[File:Preyfar_ac99.jpg|thumb|right|He wasn't always so fat and bald ([[Anthrocon]] 1999)]]
[[File:Faggot.jpg|thumb|Dick Masterson's final form]]
Dragoneer is one of [[whore|those people]] that always somehow manages to have the latest fancy gadget to hit the market. He owns a [http://twitpic.com/2d4d06 Alienware desktop computer, a HDTV, a fursuit], [http://twitpic.com/cs6ef at least one] [http://twitpic.com/2gcekq custom built computer], a [http://twitpic.com/2fwrox Droid cell phone], iPhones that he can make into [http://www.furaffinity.net/view/3973132/ iPhone sandwiches] and probably much, much more. Don't forget he's [[always]] commissioning some [[Offended|great new pieces of art]] of his [[original character]]!
[[At least 100 years ago]], Dick owned a website titled menarebetterthanwomen.com, through which he shared his infinite [[bullshit|wisdom]] with fellow [[asshole]]s and [[Man|chauvinist]]s on the internet. Having an advanced degree in Dickology, Dick has written many classic works, including this list of reasons on why [[fact|men are way better than women]], something he would turn into a bestseller on and even translated that into a #1 bestselling book on Amazon. The site has remained inactive as of 2010, largely due to the popularity of the video media he produced for [[JewTube]].
He's also an [[alcoholic]] and likes to [[File:Sean_Piche_And_Alcohool.png|talk about his experience with other furries about being drunk]], which happens often because he is [[Dying alone|alone]]. He was warned several times at [[Anthrocon]] 2010 for inviting a couple of [[jailbait|17/18 year old furries]] ([http://www.furaffinity.net/user/xanthosking xanthosking] and [http://www.furaffinity.net/user/zharr18 zharr18]) to have a drink [[rape|in his hotel room]], which is illegal. But, they were [[canada|Canadians]], where the legal drinking age is 18. So it's [[awwright]]!
'''Dick:''' ''women line up to go out with me!''<br>
'''[[whore|Her]]:''' ''I don't see any women lining up to go out with you, and even if there were, I would be at the end of that line.''<br>
'''Dick:''' ''Well if you hit the treadmill more, you'd be at the front.''
Dragoneer is also a supporter of ''Making The Fandom Look Good™''. He was quick to proclaim a FA user named Dogbomb [[An hero|a hero]] after [http://www.furaffinity.net/view/4296204 sat in fursuit with a kid] suffering from Cerebral Palsy, saying how it improved the fandom's image while he was simultaneously drawing and commissioning furry porn. Yes Dogbomb, you're literally god's gift to the earth for sitting with a cripple, you win a years supply of [[viagra]] and a [[golden shower]] so sayeth Princess Piche. Clearly Sean doesn't think running the largest furry porn [[cumdumpster|repository]] on the internet is contributing to the [[Yiff|problem]].
This is an example of a technique Dick pioneered known as the "Verbal Cunt Punt" or VCP for short. It allows dick to turn raging [[Feminazis]] back into respectable women without the need to punch or kick their filthy untouched snatches.
[[File:Dragoneer noanonallowed.png|thumb|Coming to all good ED articles near you]]
<center>Top 10 Reasons why Men are Better than Women</center>
His most notable method of gaining popularity is also known as "playing the [[cool guy]]" (read: INSATIABLE [[memefag|MEMEFAG]]), which consists of posting a link to the most popular [[YouTube]] video of the moment, filling his posts and tweets with [[memes]] (while not knowing what they mean), countless attempts at [[chanspeak]] and countless references to [[TF2]], [[Portal]], and [[b/|/b/]]. This is especially true when he uses FA's mascot account Fender to make updates, which usually consist of pure [[Anti-lulz]] (take this for example). This is especially true when he uses FA's mascot account [http://www.furaffinity.net/user/fender/ Fender] to make updates, which usually consist of pure Anti-lulz (take this for example). Dragoneer will constantly claim to be open-minded about Internet culture, but if you tell him you're an [[anon]], a [[goon]], and/or post on [[ED]] (or merely have references to those on your profile), you'll almost certainly receive his banhammer since anonymous is always conspiring against him or some shit. Because being cool is a privilege only Dragoneer and his crew have. This can all be accurately described as FA being an echochamber of fat smelly retards sitting around all day sniffing their farts totally convinced they are [[hubris|the wittiest, smartest, most intelligent furries the world has ever seen.]]
===Career===
<center>
[[Image:Sean Piche Resume From LinkedIn.png|thumb|Sean Piche's resume from LinkedIn. All the periods of unemployment show how successful he '''really''' is at his career.]]
[[Image:Sean Piche at Camp Chaos.jpg|thumb|Group photo taken at Camp Chaos in Reading, PA in early 2004. Sean Piche only survived there for 4 months before being kicked to the curb.]]
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Having a penis — in other words looking like a man and having man parts — is a man’s way of telling other men, ‘Hey. Look at me. I’m a man. I won’t fuck up whatever it is that you’re trying to do.'''}}|10. Men have penises
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Marriage was invented because women were too busy whoring it out to fuck the only the guy who was paying their rent and feeding their fat asses French bon-bons every day.'''}}|9. Marriage is stupid
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Men are natural destroyers. We pop right out of the man-womb and start on a life-long tirade of progress by tearing down the Earth with our mighty, man-manly man-fists. Goddammit, that’s awesome!'''}}|8. Boys destroy things
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Women don’t wear watches; they wear bracelets. Women wearing bracelets is like dropping a bus of retarded kids off in front of a taffy pulling machine. They can just stare for hours and never get bored.'''}}|7. Men wear watches
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Writing is stupid and an ineffective way to communicate. Men know this so they don’t give a shit about handwriting things with big hoops and loops and squiggles and shit so aliens can read notes about remembering to pick up your birth control pills after 6th period from space.'''}}|6. Men write illegibly
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Men know this so they blast off from birth like shooting man stars — burning out ten years faster, but setting the whole night ablaze with manness. Women just kind of lie around like big fat pigs in big fat puddles of shit.'''}}|5. Men live less than women
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Women’s entire lives and social circles are based around hatred.'''}}|4. Women are racists
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Women are social chameleons — or better yet: social vampires.'''}}|3. Men are not sponges
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''I believe all women suffer from a mild and extremely localized form of Tourette Syndrome. The afflicted organ? Their tongues.'''}}|2. Men do not have Tourette Syndrome
|{{colortext|#00007f|'''Whether or not you believe in Jesus, there is one fact you can’t argue with: he was a man. No religion anywhere has ever put a woman in charge of shit. That’s called dogma — man-dogma — and it means men are better than women.'''}}|1. [[Jesus]] was a Man
}}|border=#00007f|background=#6666ff}}
</center>
Dragoneer has had quite an [[boring|exciting]] career as far as furfag losers go. He's [[failed|worked]] as an animator for VH1/Viacom and even worked in the [[Terrorist|middle east]]. This is proof that America spends so much money on its military that even someone like Dragoneer can get a piece of the action.
===Dr. Phil===
[[File:humanthumb.jpg|300px|thumb|right|Dr. Phil without makeup]]
[[Image:Fat-and-pwnd.gif|thumb|A typical reaction to the truth. Fucking priceless.]]
{{天|[[fanboy|Users]] editing another wiki entirely have spent way more time documenting this bit of internet history<br/><small>[https://dickipedia.fandom.com/wiki/Dick_on_Dr._Phil you can check that out here]</small>|hackinghacker.gif|180px|Gainsboro|50%}}
====As an animator====
Possibly the most well known and prodigious first appearance of Dick Masterson would have been his very first appearance on [[Dr. Phil]], a [[HelLA|Los Angeles]]-based tabloid talk show hosted by the human thumb from Spy Kids. Dick appeared as his bombastic, chauvinistic self as a featured guest, and once again on the Dr. Phil House mini-series, amid a slew of other guests with similar views. This was essentially a trashy reality TV show where people are exploited for the entertainment of the [[stupid|low-IQ viewers]] watching that shit. Dick's steadfast approach to criticism as well as his magnetic charisma cemented him as an agent provocateur, inciting self-professed feminists to express their true feelings and views. He simply states a general view about women, and then [[feminazi]]s, [[dyke]]s and [[faggots]] bombard him with death and castration threats, often accompanied by a [[irony|generalized claim about men]], at which point he exploited their own views [[i did it for the lulz|for the lulz]].
Sean once worked for a couple of weeks in an animation department, where he composed the background of a few scenes for "ILL-ustrated", and did the text formatting for the credits page. His job was to be involved with a little cartoon on VH1, circa 2003. Sean didn't stay because he wanted to take the place of the character designer and become an animator, even though he had no artistic background or knowledge to perform this kind of task. His contract with VH1 was terminated prematurely, and it remains the best work he has ever had to this day.
====Army career====
Dr. Phil was so humiliated by the episodes, according to Dick, that he ordered the House of Judgement segments to be cut months after their initial airing, and were eventually [[deleted|BAWWWleeted]] from the Dr. Phil archive. Later it was revealed that Shirley Dieu (a fictionalized and faked personality created solely for Dick to poke fun at) revealed she had sued Dr. Phil for deceptive business practices and a range of other issues. She revealed that everyone's possessions were confiscated by the production team (including their cell phones), the catering was intentionally terrible and all the guests were forced to share the same bathrooms. Possibly the most egregious thing that happened during filming was a random naked guy literally showing up and exposing their genitalia to the contestants.
Apparently, someone at the DoD decided it was a good move to give Sekrit clearance to him so he could develop computer systems in [[Kyrgyzstan]]. He may tell you he was sent to Manas Air Base to handle top secret data, but all he really was was a glorified [[Script_Kiddie|MSCE]], hooking up computers to ethernet cables and reinstalling Windows XP on the base's Dell Optiplex machines. (Nothing that could land on WikiLeaks.) However, having "IT technician for the DOD" gave him some seizures of power, even if said computers were used like cybercafes: to allow soldiers to communicate with their families and look at porn. This is more evidence of the [[Furluminati]] in action.
Fortunately, he was never given the opportunity to ever deal with anything classified there, so America remained safe from this buffoon at least. Again, he was sent back in the country circa 2008 for [[fat|medical reasons]], [[lazy|being unproductive]] (since he had to "manage" FurAffinity), and perhaps because he was too dumb to stay in service anyways.
Dick placed a $1,000 bounty for the original cuts of the show, which he honored when some [[Sweden|Sweedish]] dickhead somehow ripped a copy from the Swedish National Archive of Recorded Sound and Moving Images, which you can see below.
[[At least 100 years ago]], Dragoneer lived in [[Philadelphia]], and ended up being hated by all the furries there. To this day he hates Giza and [[Uncle Kage]] because of what happened there. [[Some argue|One side]] of the story is that he was a borderline-crazy dumbass who appeared to have genuine psychological problems and thus people began avoiding him. Of course, his paranoia about this didn't really help things either. Dragoneer, being still obsessed with events almost a decade old, recently revealed more when responding to the latest surfacing of the [[facts]] surrounding [[Jibba Foxcoon]] (namely, that [[2 gryphon]] is an [[asshole]], but I repeat myself):
|<youtube>nGDF5Y0AkrU</youtube> '''Episode 1: Dick on Treadmills'''
|<youtube>GHhzZLEmE2s</youtube> '''Episode 2: Dick on Single Mothers'''
|<youtube>1jYi6uanPzY</youtube> '''Episode 3: Dick on a Boatload of Emotional Women'''
|<youtube>QqJSnVcb4Js</youtube> '''Episode 4: Dick on Drawing Conclusions'''
|<youtube>T0xoKiH8JJM</youtube> '''"Female anger is the weathervane of truth"'''
|<youtube>htzdo0FBBYk</youtube> '''[[Godhand Edit|FUCK YES YOU ARE THE BEST MAN EVER]]'''
|<youtube>O6W6n9gsrqQ</youtube> '''"Should have stayed in the kitchen where you were safe"'''
|<youtube>1EsLC5FD8R4</youtube> '''"You're paying for the whore to leave"'''}}
{{tinyquote|Giza was angry at me because I called him out for cheating on Phil da Feline. Way back when, Giza and Phil da Feline were dating. Phil walked in on Giza sucking another guy's dick, they got into huge drama, fights ensued. A while later, they got back together... and at MFF, same shit happened together. One day Phil came over to my place, crying, claiming Giza tried to take advantage of him... and I went ballistic. I started openly called Giza out via my LiveJournal for cheating on Phil, lying and being a general douchebag. I wasn't very mature about it, but given what happened... I didn't really care. We had a huge drama war, and Giza eventually went to Kage to ask Kage to "fix" his problem. Namely, get rid of me So Kage did. Kage defended Giza (and blindly at that), refused to even hear my side of the story, and Kage kept saying if he wanted to cheat on Phil then that was Giza's right. And he defended that. I called shenanigans, but Kage had already made up his mind before he even spoke to me. Because I stood up to Kage, I got "promoted" from convention operations to "sales guy" for the artist's alley. So I left. Basically, they knew I'd do that... and I have no regrets about it. I wasn't thrown off AC (and I have several FA staffers who will back me up on this), but if they want to look at that way then I guess by demoting me they kinda did. In the end, Kage defended Giza's right to cheat on Phil, and I left Anthrocon and ended up going to Fur Affinity. Giza still takes pot-shots at me every once and a while. He does not seem to have the ability to let bygones be bygones. Some of my friends on Anthrocon's staff send me logs and shit when he goes berserk over it. I posted a journal two years later saying I wasn't going to Anthrocon, I was bailing on the con... and Kage took that as me outright attacking on AC. For... some reason. Thing was: I was at risk of losing my apartment due to financial problems at the time (animators didn't get paid a lot) and couldn't afford the con. I put life ahead of furry. The last thing Kage ever said to me was "Welcome to my shitlist, asshole." Why? Because in that same journal some people called Anthrocon "Kagecon" in my LiveJournal. And he detonated on me. This had nothing to do with Growly at all. Kage hasn't spoken to me since 2005. Even when we had stood in line next to each other for an hour to go to MFF in 2006, he wouldn't speak to me. Or even acknowledge I was there. It was cute.}}
== The Biggest Problem in the Universe ==
[[File:e69_erin2.jpg|thumb|right|The polarity between the hosts masculinity is uncanny af]]
[[File:Maddoxgrinch.jpg|thumb|right|Then he got an idea. An awful idea. The cuck got a wonderful, ''awful'' idea!]]
On May 20th, 2014, Masterson started a podcast called [http://thebiggestproblemintheuniverse.com The Biggest Problem in the Universe] with co-host and mutual acquaintance [[Maddox]]. The Podcast was pretty pretty [[awwright]] at the beginning, but what made the show lulzy was that the entire premise of the show was Dick trolling the shit out of this [[autistic]] 40 year old balding [[Armenian]] [[cuck]], bringing his overbearingly masculine shit-talking game to the fore and instigating massive chimpouts from his co-host. Over time, the show's fanbase gravitated towards Dick, voting his problems over Maddox's. While Dick really didn't give a shit since this show was just a framing device to allow them to air their pet peeves, Maddox would take this personally and seethe with anger whenever it was brought up. Things that Dick talked about include:
*Getting so drunk he took a shit in his fathers pants
*Only doing cool drugs
*Never using condoms during sex
*Talking about how global warming is made up
*Talking about how swearing and saying retard isn't cool
*White knighting for female guest and getting his jimmies rustled when called out for being a white knight
*Forcing Maddox to watch Titanic every time he brought a problem that was shit
====IMVU====
<center><youtube>lNZ-Njp1YCw</youtube></center>
Sean was employed by [[IMVU]] to run [[FurAffinity]] full time, a job he did [https://forums.vivisector.org/index.php?topic=708.0 extremely poorly] despite it being his dream job and what he's wanted since taking ownership of the site. Previously, he worked for [[Amazon]] and as a government contractor in the [[IT]] field. No one is sure what his specific job was, because he [[CIA|encourages bullshit rumors to obscure more accurate rumors]]. However, fortunately for us some people watch his [[Twitter]], where he's [[retarded|not particularly guarded]] about all the [[TF2|stuff]] he does at work on the [[you|taxpayer's]] dime. It would seem that his job consists of him [http://twitpic.com/28xvb7 re-arranging his desk], [http://twitpic.com/1hkj54 playing video games], [http://twitter.com/Dragoneer/status/20130771963 chatting on YIM] and managing Blackberry service plans. Sometimes he has to do [http://twitter.com/Dragoneer/status/12599983586 actual work] and he whines about it. Your tax dollars at work!
He was also responsible for managing Furaffinity's [[Jew Gold]] that comes in from donations and ad revenue, until [[IMVU]] took a look at him and realized they didn't want him touching their money. When he WAS in charge of finances, Furaffinity was always low on funds and every time a server slows down or breaks due to poor coding, [[moar]] money was needed to fix the problem. Where did all that money go? Remember the iPhone Sandwich earlier? [[Theft|yeahhhhhh...]]
On May 31st, 2016, Maddox abruptly cancelled the successful 107 episode Podcast (not including bonus content) due to Maddox being upset that Dick was having sex with his ex girlfriend (whom Maddox had been broken up with for 3 years, and happened while he was already dating his current live in girlfriend). Being [[cuck]]ed by Masterson, he killed the podcast and begun to wage a never-ending war to ruin Dick's personal and professional reputation. On September 25th, 2016, [[Maddox]] posted a character assassination video in which he attempted to spin an innocuous statement by Masterson, where he stated that if a [[whore|woman]] fell asleep in a bar, she should expect to be taken sexual advantage of because it is a natural consequence of the situation. With this dogwhistle the helldogs of the [[SJW]] world descended upon him, leading to his dismissal from [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Upright_Citizens_Brigade Upright Citizen's Brigade] [[snca|(some gay improv group in NYC)]]. Dick refused to disown any of his work, even in the face of threats, and stood by every word he has ever written on his website and in his book (unlike Maddox, who did).
If you post a journal and question where all the money went, you'd get a private message from Dragoneer (which are not private by the way, since [[FurAffinity]] staff are able check notes for 'security reasons'). He will politely ask you to remove the journal entry, or he will have no choice but to ban you. If you keep questioning where the money goes, you will get permanently banned. See [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/1580816/ this journal] as an example on what not to do.
<big>[https://web.archive.org/web/20161102004143/https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OeW4m76E7S0 '''YOU CAN SEE THAT VIDEO HERE, BECAUSE THE SMELLY FAGGOT PRIVATED THE VIDEO''']</big>
Judging by his [[Furaffinity|track record]] at running servers, there's probably a reason he's not doing more at work. Would [[you]] let him work on servers, especially with potentially classified information on them? Yeah, we wouldn't trust him to run a bath, let alone what he's doing these days.
Some time after the drama reddit user {{reddituser|Antoids}} unleashed the full force of his autism and painstakingly edited every single episode of the podcast to reveal a slew of content that was cut from production. Most of it was Maddox incomprehensibly stammering like Porky Pig, but there were still large chunks of stuff removed where Dick was either laughing at Maddox, joking at his expense, making him look like a dumbass and so on. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WHb02h7GMU&list=PL502urtP28_9FsepAojgrLC76YO7jigqD You can view evidence of this here.]
{{clear}}
====Owner of Furaffinity====
== The Dick Show ==
[[Image:Sean Piche spends 150 dollars on a power cable.PNG|thumb|$150 on a power cable? FA's donations hard at work.]]
[[Image:Unabomber-fbi.gif|thumb|220px|Ted Kaczynski took the fall for Dick]]
[[File:Neer-fnaf.png|thumb|How unexpected of someone to accept free ad-space on a very well known site for fetishists.]]
[[Banhammer|Premier]] Dragoneer of the Furfag [[Scumbag|Communist]] [[Admins|Party]] is the supremely [[lie|completely competent]] [[Blowjob|head]] [[Administrator]] of FurAffinity.net, [[Ego|a job he cherishes]]. Arcturus, the prior owner, assigned him to this position because he assumed Sean would be a useful idiot like everyone else. Dragoneer eventually gathered enough [[drugs]] or money or whatever he needed to buy Arcturus out, and sat upon the shit throne that was FA. He may be quick to tell you how difficult his "work" is, but don't be fooled - the only real difficulty he has is banning anyone who speaks out against him, dealing with (or starting) controversy, and trying to hide his obvious gunshyness for babyfurs! Since he's too [[lazy|indolent]] to do any real work himself, he assembled a [[fail|top-notch team]] of staff to do stuff for him... badly.
|<youtube>j_BhivBuuoI</youtube> '''Sam Hyde's Lost MDE sketch exclusive'''
|<youtube>8MdjhKWG4IQ</youtube> '''The Ballad of Mansplaining'''
|<youtube>Lw1cqWH4ziA</youtube> '''How the victory of Donald Trump will be'''}}
Actually, to give him credit he DOES do something that could be very loosely construed as work. Things like:
Following the untimely death of The Biggest Problem in the Universe, Masterson started his own Podcast called ''The Dick Show''. Weekly tidbits of Hot Goss are distributed like Orange Chicken samples in a supermarket. Hosting the show with him is his co-host Sean Jacobson, and his audio engineer Asterios Kokanos, and a rotating cast of recurring guests, including [[Lowtax]], MadCucks ([[powerword|Trevor Brit]]), and some weirdo Dick called Steve met once at a Burning Man gig. While the show can be entertaining since it started off being slapped together last minute and devolved into a [[WWE| male soap opera of drama and gossip]], and as a result requires the listener to have [[TL;DR]] context and backstory of drama involving an dead podcast, then listen to all episodes in chronological order; otherwise, entire 30 minute chunks of an episode [[Da fuq|make absolutely no sense]]. Despite being possibly the most [[TL;DR]] Podcast in human history that requires more back story and cliff notes than [[Dungeons & Dragons]], it is ranked in the top 20 highest grossing Patreons.
*Sealing the deal like [[The Donald]] with [[Five Nights at Freddy's]] dev Scott Cawthon, offering him free ad-space on his disgusting website.
*Spending $150 on a power cable, because spending an [[Over_9000|over 9000 percent]] markup on a cable is a sensible thing to do.
*Handling [[DMCA]] complaints like a child. He will ban you for sending one in before posting it on his [[Twitter]] and will publicly mock you because you asked him to do [[work]]. If this happens to [[you]], a [[Allan|proven alternative]] is to send the DMCA to their [http://inforelay.com/ Datacenter/ISP] [[spam|multiple times]], who will eventually [http://twitter.com/Dragoneer/statuses/26508573833 tell him] to stop being infantile and remove the content.
If you're an [[furry art|artist]] and upload furry porn, you will have around 20 or 30,000 pageviews, if not more. In fact, you might even multiply it by 10, as [[FurAffinity]] only counts registered members' views only. This has always been the strategy of FurAffinity's staff, as admitted by [http://www.furaffinity.net/user/lexyeevee/ Eevee], a site coder on [[Furnet]]'s #FurAffinity-Dev chatroom years ago. (Eevee was banned in mid-October for exploiting a huge security hole in FA's new "comment hiding" option - being able to "hide" comments even if you weren't the owner of the journal/submission. Eevee is definitely [[an hero]] for finding this out. Details of the exploits can be found [http://eevee.livejournal.com/329409.html here] and [http://eevee.livejournal.com/329817.html here]).
By this efficient philosophy, "devaluing" the site's audience on purpose justifies the donations, and, as always, all the [[gullible]] members believe this.
In the ashes of Dick Masterson proved to have a very useful weapon in his arsenal that Maddox did not count on. What does a man do when his former business partner attacks him, organizes a smear campaign against him, and leaves you with a fan base full of autistic sperglords? Like the legendary [https://wiki.bibanon.org/The_Legend_of_Chippo_Man chippo man] of yore, you weaponize that autism into your very own personal army.
In spite of his preaching of 'making the furry scene look good', the most hypocritical and infuriating aspects of Dragoneer is that he actively engages in the furry drama scene, a mecca of [[unfunny|wit]] and [[circlejerk|one-upmanship.]] You can bet that if there's a post about Dragoneer, FurAffinity, or one of his other passions, he'll show up and probably make a fool of himself. It is then up to [[you]] (or the [[moderator]]s) to either mercy ban him or use his low-wattage intellect for [[lulz|amusement]]. For example; he's still obsessed with the Philadelphia furry community and the [[Anthrocon]] crew, but nearly every single one of them thought he was too ignorant, noisy, and annoying to be around, even for a furry degenerate. People that deal with [[Uncle Kage]] on a regular basis basically informed him that he talked too much and that he should never be on staff again, kthx. As a result they started avoiding him, something that even he was able to notice, as can be evidenced in [http://lists.claws-and-paws.com/pipermail/pa-furry/2003-November/005695.html this poor attempt] at subtle sarcasm on the PA furry mailing list. He moved out of that area in the early 2000s but still harbors a grudge against them to this day, as evidenced in the [http://forums.vivisector.org/index.php/topic,113.0.html ongoing feud] between [[Uncle Kage]]'s Macrophile Denial-fest and Sean's vanity con he purchased with that sweet, sweet gummint-contractor money.
It is all well and good if Sean or one of his many fanboys badmouth Kage or spread unverifiable innuendo, but if you do the same about FA and/or Dragoneer himself Sean will revert to making bad jokes and pretending to take it all with good humor (and not being very convincing) until he thinks he can vent with some privacy, at which point you have earned yourself an [[Internet tough guy|enemy]] for life.
When Maddox's attack failed miserably and backfired, fans of TDS kicked in a whopping $18,465 (2/2/17) to the Dick fund, spiralling him into a 24-hour, 7 day a week alcoholic rage, condensed into an hour and a half long [[Podcast]].
Dick then [[Witchcraft|channelled]] the power of autism to outsource the work of [https://imgur.com/a/ji30G#xlDQCRe finding examples of Maddox advocating sexual assault], causing Maddox to [http://imgur.com/a/7Pp2x disavow his only successful book]. Another autist with far too much time on his hands decided to [https://www.reddit.com/r/TheDickShow/comments/55ojx0/discrepancies_and_analysis_of_bpitudick_show/ go through the accounting ledger to show Maddox was lying about his financial claims and actually owed Dick over $5,000.] Another poster on the board (Trevor Brit) became a long-term contributor on TDS as a not so subtle parody of Maddox, and ended up earning more money on Patreon than the real Maddox. They then decided to do some epic trolling by purchasing domains related to Maddox and all people associated with Madcast media, troll Maddox's Twitch stream, create a [https://i.redd.it/x7qxfcgbmfhy.jpg #1 charting comedy album] about what a [[cuck]] faggot Maddox is and chart higher Maddox's #4 charting comedy album, and [https://www.reddit.com/r/TheDickShow/comments/63z225/maddoxs_new_book_is_100_new_material/ pick apart the content of his new book] to prove that the entire thing is Maddox recycling old rants from Biggest Problem in the Universe.
In the spirit of starting drama, here's some things he doesn't want you to bring up:
Dick has weaponized autism by separating his audience into two catagories: [[Liquid Chris|top autist]] and [[Chris-chan|bottom autist]]. He incentivizes weaponized autism by giving autists 'life advice' in a simple to understand way even a retard can understand and mocking them when there is too much tism (aka labeling them a bottom autist). Dick is able to do this because he is an autism himself, however instead of focusing his autism into Thomas the Tank Engine and Sonic, he focused it on guns, bombs, telling women they are inferior to men, and trolling. Basicly Dick is /pol/ IRL, minus <s>being half spic and</s>([[Unrealistic expectations|as of January 2018, Dick is retroactively half Greek]]) loving jews.
====ZOMG HE HAS A BROTHER====
<center>
It seems Sean's brother, name currently unknown, was let out of its cage Christmas Eve, to celebrate with the rest of the Piches. Its level of intelligence, looks, and behavior comes to the light as the creature immediately began to chew on the couch and shit on the floor. Sean has never spoken of this failed abortion, most likely because even he is ashamed of this disgrace to humanity. What Dragoneer doesn't realize is that Encyclopedia Dramatica is an archive of failures on the internet, and when he finds out that his deformed blob of a brother has been found out and archived into the history of drama, rest assure he will deny his brother as much as the [[holocaust]].
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<center><youtube>qEX9cpV7UBg</youtube></center>
<center><big>'''(Yes, a top autist parody of Maddox actually makes more money than the real Maddox.)'''</big></center>
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== HOT GOSS: Dick vs Maddox & Other Associated Drama ==
File:WATSOVERTHERE.jpg|The animal hunts for its prey.
When Dick and Maddox broke up due to '[[Autistic]] differences,' Dick attempted to end things as [[gay|nice]] as he could saying [[Maddox]] was a legend and he was grateful for the [[lemonparty|opportunity to]] [[AIDS|host]] a podcast with him. However, because Maddox is incapable of acting like an adult and both of them are notorious internet trolls, this quickly dissolved and turned into a Battle Royale-grade free for all. As Maddox had already pissed off his fans by killing the podcast they loved and becoming an unfunny cuck, Maddox took the coward's way forward sneaking around implying shit he couldn't back up about Dick and sending his employees to dox, harass employers, and do his general [[Scat|dirty work]] while publicly pretending to be above it all and to be a [[Pussy|good boy]] who [[dindu nuffin]]. Dick, secure in the fact that Maddox made a flaming bitch of himself on his side, handled it like a [[Trap|man]] by publicly airing his dirty laundry and shaming him. Dick later got a bit more creative and him as well as his army of people who hated Maddox decided to [[troll|have some fun]] and:
File:Itsafurfag.jpg|Even this thing wants to be a furry. It'll fit right in.
File:FatherandSon.jpg|Even his father cringes at the touch of his offspring.
{{frame|
File:PerfectComparison.jpg|The resemblance is almost perfect.
<center><youtube>uQ9UDOQ17Vw</youtube></center>
File:OHSHIT.jpg|OSHI-
<big><CENTER>'''TL;DW'''</CENTER></big>
</gallery></center>
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<br>
====Sciggles====
*Buy up Maddox's sponsor domains,
{{Spoiler|As predicted, Sciggles separated from 'Neer in early 2016!}}
*Redirect Domains of his co-hosts' websites to,
[[File:Sciggles_neerhead.jpg|left|thumb|Sciggles poses next to a decapitated Dragoneer.]]
*Read private "[[Fuckboy|Please get back with me]]" letters he wrote his ex,
[[File:Sciggles_Is_A_Dominatrix.png|right|thumb|Look at Dragoneer. Not only being dominated, but also being a BITCH-ASS ANAL VORING FURFAG!! And why isn't she makin' him a sammich?]]
*Create Billboard charting albums about what a [[cuck]] Maddox is to out sell his album,
'''[http://www.furaffinity.net/user/Sciggles Sciggles]''' (a.k.a. '''[http://www.facebook.com/Sciggles Susan Scoggins]''') <s>is</s> was Dragoneer's [[Wife]], until she left him in early 2016 for a [[Brony]] who was actually [https://forums.vivisector.org/index.php?topic=878.0 better looking than him]>. She is several years younger than Dragoneer, and was young enough when they met that she couldn't legally consume his favorite [[alcohol|alcoholic drinks]], [http://twitter.com/Dragoneer/statuses/14184260961312768 butthat didn't stop him from giving them to her anyways], backing up beliefs that he [[Pedo|likes 'em young]]. Sciggles <s>is</s> was Dragoneer's <s>biggest</s> only fan and even [[Obsession|made a Dragoneer hat and plushie]] and wore them to [[Anthrocon|Anthrocon 2010]]. Did we mention [[Slut|she was with another guy at the time]]?
*Create a parody of Maddox called Madcucks,
*Buy a billboard outside of Madcast Media's official P.O. Box saying what a cuck Maddox is,
*Release bonus content from Madcucks that outsells Maddox's bonus content,
*Establish a "podcast network" that isn't even really a network, but is still more popular and gets more downloads than Maddox's official Madcast Media network that he hyped up for over 2 years to relase shortly before his book,
*Shit talk Maddox's sponsors,
*Explain how Maddox makes his money off shirts by selling shitty quality Guildan shirts,
*Buy the domain to the super secret domain that Maddox was originally going to name his book,
*Release a Madcucks book with that same exact name making fun of what a faggot cuck Maddox is,
*Release the financial records of Biggest Problem in the Universe,
*Make fun of guests that go on Maddox's show,
*Get a restraining order against his current girlfriend Jessica "M3ntal Jess" Blum,
*Troll his twitch stream,
*Shit on Maddox's podcast reviews,
*Leak Maddox's chat logs,
*Poach Maddox's audio engineer and making him co-host in exchange for him never working for Maddox again,
*Take the Patreon name Maddox,
*And sue Maddox of trademark patent disputes.
It is rumored Sciggles is doing it [[for the lulz]], ultimately with the goal of marrying Dragoneer before filing for [[divorce]] and taking half of his precious belongings or waiting for the inevitable [[heart attack]] from consuming so many [[Jenkem|energy drinks]] and reaping the reward: the world's largest furporn collection. If she's not, well, we feel sorry for the kids that will one day inevitably stumble upon Dragoneer's anal vore porn collection (you think that's [[srsly|a joke]], don't you?) Besides, everyone knows that Dragoneer will never have [[jailbait|kids]] because that means he'd have to stop buying [[over 9000]] [[iPhone]]s a month and buying, well, anal vore porn sketches from high-priced artists.
Dick soon learned just from his own personal beef with Maddox that Drama was profitable and makes for [[encyclopedia dramatica|quality content]]. Other Drama sagas on his podcast include (but are not limited to):
During the Closing Ceremonies of FurAffinity United 2011, Dragoneer showed he was truly a [[Loser|classy gentleman]] and proposed to Sciggles in a room full of random furfags, in an scene worthy of a banned horror film.
*Making his liberal writer vote for [[Donald Trump]]
<center><youtube>nWLU2HDBofg</youtube></center>
*Getting a mod of /r/the_donald to Box a liberal faggot greek Asterios whose only stated training regimen was to "get as fat and train as little as possible just like the real Donald Trump"... and the /r/the_donald mod lost!
*Everyone forever mocking the losing mod's girlfriend, a furfag cat-kin
*Having a fan almost kill himself on air (see Valentine's Day Massacre)
*Inviting [[Null]] on as a guest and as a result KiwiFarms getting shut down the next day
*Inviting [[Faggot|Mike Cernovich]] on as a guest and then letting his writers and fans mercilessly mock and ridicule Thernovich ever since
*A war between his facebook and reddit group who hate and fuck with each other all the time
*Advising listeners to drink wrecklessly and do only the [[Win|cool drugs]].
In early [[2016]], Sciggles began drawing a bunch of art for a guy called [[Edgy|Fireenvy]] who is the worst combination of both [[Brony]] and [[Furfag]]. Dragoneer, too stupid to realize he was being [[Cuck|cucked]], was perfectly okay with her drawing [[Porn|obvious romantic art]] with this guy and considered him a [[friend]]. He eventually figured it out, but [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/7506046/ tried to cover it up], thinking nobody would notice she was practically hanging off another guy.
== Best debate in the universe: Brought to you by Dick Masterson ==
====Dox====
[https://encyclopediadramatica.rs/Maddox#The_Biggest_Lolsuit_in_the_Universe_.28AKA:_George_Ouzounian_et_al_-_v._-_Dax_Herrera_et_al.29 Maddox sued Dick and everyone he knew for $20 million each per count in New York City.] The lolsuit was the funniest thing produced by Maddox in over 10 years, and ended with Maddox and his drunken dog bite lawyer getting their shit rammed in.
In December 2010 Dragoneer got ''another'' new cellphone and proceeded to use [[Twitter]] on it, neglecting to turn off the [[Stalker|Geolocation feature]] causing him to dox himself. [[Lulz.net]] got ahold of [http://twitter.com/#!/Dragoneer/status/12257132208455680 this] [http://twitter.com/#!/Dragoneer/status/12135853908299776 information] and caused Dragoneer to bawwww about it on [[Livejournal]], claiming that people hate him just because he's an admin.
He <s>lives [http://maps.google.com/maps?q=12004+Starboard+Dr+%23302,+Reston,+VA+20194&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-a&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=12004+Starboard+Dr,+Reston,+Fairfax,+Virginia+20194&gl=us&ei=67AATaH0L5CmnQe-sczlDQ&oi=geocode_result&ved=0CBYQ8gEwAA&t=h&z=16 here]</s> moved [https://goo.gl/maps/mF61gPTAHeN2 here] and works [http://www.usis.com here].
After winning his lolsuit, Dick was upset. He wasn't ready for the fun of laughing at Maddox to end and all Maddox wanted to do now was cry in his [[hugbox|cuck shed]] alone and pretend he never tried to do something so retarded. So to spice things up after Maddox released his nuclear option that [[Bukkake|blew up in his own face]], Dick decided on Episode 113 of <s>Biggest Problem in the 2niverse: The search for more money and less Dick</s> Best Debate in Universe to give Maddox, just the Tip of what is looking to be a [[lulz|hilarious]] future series of dickings Maddox's anus was never prepared for:
==Progression in Allegory==
<big>[https://soundcloud.com/user-663667932/113-should-certain-animals-be-extinct-ali-spagnola-ron-babcock-taylor-nikolai-maddox-crows '''DICK HAS HAD SOLE OWNERSHIP OF THE ORIGINAL STOLEN BIGGEST PROBLEM IN THE UNIVERSE ITUNES FEED THIS WHOLE TIME AND WAS ALLOWING MADDOX TO USE IT. HE DECIDED TO INFORM MADDOX OF THIS FACT BY SPLICING IN AN AD FOR HIS SHOW AT THE BEGINNING OF EPISODE 113 AS WELL AS A QUICK RUNDOWN OF WHAT HAPPENED FOR ALL THE BIGGEST PROBLEM FANS WHO WONDERED WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED AND WHY IS THIS GAY FAGGY PODCAST SHOWING UP INSTEAD'''].</big>
To further [[rape|help]] Maddox, Dick decided to send his listeners to Maddox's $30,000 website and use his voting system to vote on what new podcast would be allowed on the C.U.N.T network. This caused Maddox to go into a full on autistic rage as he takes voting on his websites super seriously. First attempting to cry to apple to get his iTunes feed that actually has subscribers back. Then getting butthurt and tampering with his own voting to fuck with Dick. To going into such a delusional world of denial he is refusing to address the sickest burn that could possibly happen to Maddox: he is trying to [https://archive.fo/11TbX pass off the increase bump in web traffic as legit traffic to his shit show's website].
<center>He doesn't die, he just slows down until he reaches absolute zero and [[fat|encompasses all the matter in the universe]]</center>
[[Image:DragoneerIRL.jpg|thumb|[[piss|That isn't apple juice in the jug.]]]]
However, internet Lawsplainer Nick Rekieta explained what the funniest part of all this is (beyond just the lulz of Dick fucking with the feed and using it to shit on Maddox), because Dick was the owner and allowed Maddox to pull his bullshit for over 2 year, Dick can legally and rightfully [[Jew|bill]] Maddox for all the time he allowed Maddox to use his iTunes feed to upload a shitty podcast.
===You are Manipulated===
<center><youtube>utTVGln1Uws</youtube></center> <center>'''A full TL;DR break down of how Maddox got cucked out of his own iTunes feed'''</center>
[[Image:Lolwutneer.png|center|Here's one of the multiple attempts from Dragoneer at sockpuppeting, but resulting into an epic failure.]]
If you upload anything containing a dragon, a penis, and/or any male Digimon (preferably Murasadramon, as that is Dragoneer's fursona) on FurAffinity, you will definitely be watched by Dragoneer himself. Great! You two are best friends now! You wouldn't grieve against a friend, would you? Dragoneer will [[lie|love your art]], even if your gallery hasn't received a single visit in weeks. If you're really good, there's a chance that he'll request you to draw something involving his character he will +fav, or even commission you, or better yet, make you an admin!
Samefaggotry is also a common technique used, even abused by Dragoneer on FurAffinity. Sometimes, he logs on as Sciggles to backup his arguments, and even often another unknown random account that nobody knows. However, he often tends to fail hard using this technique, which requires to log out and log in as your sockpuppet account.
Dick still owns the iTunes feed because Apple is not going to disregard property law to appease a crying bald faggot who talked shit about them for years, and has said when it comes to his ways to fuck with Maddox, this isn't even his final form.
[http://inkjammer.deviantart.com/ His DeviantART] has also been used to reinforce his arguments in favor of himself, claiming that he is awesome and a legit administrator. Unfortunately, everyone saw him coming a mile away due to his response time. Thanks to DeviantART (and certain administrators who are aware of Dragoneer's actions there), you can easily hide or delete these comments.
<b><CENTER>'''"I'm not triggered you shithead"'''Dick knows how to stay calm...also TL;DW</CENTER></b>
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<br>
===I am banned. What do I do?===
[[Last tuesday]], Destiny used his [[autism]] to successfully [[bait]] Dick into a "debate." This however was a 'debate' in the the same way autistic screeching is a conversation. Dick being a drunken rage filled asshole who is too lazy to research twitch attention whores, fell into a trap and admittedly he did not perform well in. Destiny accomplished this by making the whole thing about Trump after Dick explicitly said he didn't want to talk about Trump. Destiny using his adderall enhanced autism to find Dick's weakness.
[[Image:AllanNeerOMG.jpg|thumbnail|right|Give Dragoneer a special favor and he'll unban you!]]
[[File:DesTINY.jpg|200px|thumb|right|DesTINY shows Dick whose the bigger man]]
[[Image:Dragoneer_bans.jpg|thumb|left|In art form.]]
"One shalt drink the semen of the Dragoneer to be forgiven for their acts and get unbanned."
This is the secret! The Dragoneer may ask you to:
*Dick goes up against <b>literally anyone</b> anyone who challenges him like a drunk rage filled asshole
*Draw his request, or ask you to commission one of his favorite artists to draw his character fucking yours.
*Dick is too lazy to research anything
*Donate at least $50 ($100 or more if you're permabanned) to retrieve access to your gallery.
*Dick lets others lead the direction of the conversation to shit on where they take it
*Never question his strategy, actions, or anything his staff does, especially [[Pinkuh]].
*Dick is a 24 hour rage
In addition, you may be required to watch him in return and to write a journal, apologizing for being a troll (or an undisciplined puppy) and state that you will quit grieving and obey the rules forever.
[[File:Masterdebater.png|200px|thumb|right|DesTINY demonstrates what physique a master debater should strive for]]
[[File:DesTINY2.jpg|200px|thumb|right|DesTINY may be cumming up short, but at least he never cums up bald ]]
As a result, Dick performed like shit. What was not supposed to be a debate and not supposed to be about Trump and supposed to be about how the way Destiny argues is a cherry picked exercise in confirmation bias that has made the internet and people shittier and unable to communicate, [[irony| turned into a debate about Trump]]. When trying to get off the topic, Destiny challeneges Dick's masculinity and accuses him of being a triggered snowflake needing the topic to be changed to keep him engaged in shit he really didn't care about talking about. Around waaaaaay top long into this "debate," Dick finally stops giving a shit and starts making fun of Destiny for being a midget. You could delude yourself into seeing this as some sort of meta-win for Dick as Dick's original statement that the way Destiny talks to people is not an actual conversation, its just autistic screeching to jerk off your ego to appeal to confirmation biases of you audience of tards over click bait talking points; but you can never take a circus midget seriously for over 30 minutes and be considered a "winner" in any way. Dick looked foolish for this, knew it, and openly admits he fucked up by letting Destiny change the subject, use sophistry tricks, and drill down into talking points into a point of absurdity. [[A winner is you| Destiny immediately declared himself a winner]], which is true in the sense that when two special ed students screech at each other in tard rage the one who is louder is the "winner". Destiny also considers it a badge of pride in triggering that he got a guy who is known for a rage based podcast that screams all the time and never does any research and argues from pathos to scream at him and not have researched sourced facts to support his arguments. Destiny's autism truly shines through at the end of the interview:
If you are an artist or just a user who draws porn, you have to additionally leave the other sites you post at, post exclusively on FurAffinity, and keep a low profile. This literally means offering your ass to Dragoneer, because he owns the Internet's most popular furry website, if not the fandom.
{{quote|DICK: I guess in the argument department I came up a little SHORT *laughs* you know what thats like. DESTINY: At least I didn't come up a little bald *Hangs up immediately* GOT HIM!|Destiny proving Dick's original point that the way Destiny talks to people is not an actual conversation, its just autistic screeching to jerk off your ego to appeal to confirmation biases of you audience of tards over click bait talking points was wrong by debating that Drumpf is bad.}}
It actually worked for Wildwulf, aka Brandon Vongthongthrip, a notorious zoophile previously banned to avoid FurAffinity's bad reputation. FurAffinity didn't want to be shown as a harvest for [[bestiality|zoophiles]]. However, he and FurAffinity remain one.
Dick also has a long list of enemies of the Dick show who he personally will punch in the face the moment an opportunity arises where he can and legally get away with it. This includes, but is not limited to:
*Maddox
*Destiny
*Madcast media
*Tim Pool
*Elon Musk
*Bill Nye
*Neil DeGrasse Tyson
*Mark Maron
*All members of Last Podcast on the Left
*Everyone at [[Cracked.com]] and it's affiliated podcasts
*Amy Schumer
*Security Guards
*The Police
*All employees of the US government (excluding military)
===Dragoneer versus Other Sites===
== Dick Masterson: Zionist shill? ==
Dragoneer is a pretty cool guy, but when you know him more personally then it becomes interesting. Here's a sample of a conversation from the week following [[e621]].net's takedown by InsaneKangaroo, and some WYS goons - a group of pro-FA furry [[whiteknight|whiteknights]] [[blowjob|showing their support]] to Dragoneer.
While Dick doesn't talk about the Jews a lot, it has occasionally come up and has made statements sounding like he want to suck circumcised cock.
<br>
<br>
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<center><youtube>3b0v3DCof8Q</youtube></center>
<center><b>Dax speaking out against der fuhrer</b></center>
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<br>
While it's unclear if he just fucking around or if Dax secretly worships the [[jew| children of satan]], you should trust Dick as much as you would trust any [[Israel|Isreali]]. There is a good chance Dick will try and fuck your girlfriend, take your population of fans, and claim he has an ancestral right to it as he lawyers up and rapes you in court.
This [[Anon]] knows Dragoneer for about two years, and confirms Dragoneer's opinions and ambitions toward rival, yet better websites, instead of improving his own.
== The Valentine's Day Massacre ==
On February 14th, 2017, Dustin, a random guy who had made a [[Facebook]] page for the show and appointed himself Moderator, brought 3 of the saddest stories to the bonus episode, at one point leaving listeners wondering if the current caller had [[an hero|killed himself]]. Among the other callers were a sexually-abused and near-homeless [[trap]] and a guy with.. well, with just a shitty life. Mind you, he brought these callers into a [[comedy]] show. Dustin, as a result of his actions, was sentenced to a day in the stocks down at the marketplace where customers could hiss and curse at him, along with the occasional [[golden shower]].
{{cs2|DragoneerChatTranscript|Chat Transcript|
== EDiot on the Dick Show ==
<pre><Dragoneer[AFK]> As an admin I'm obliged to condone IK's actions<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> but personally I understand his motivations and respect that.<br>
<Anon> i see. thought you had something against him..<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> He's a friend of mine<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> I, and many others respect his idea to fight illegal content<br>
One of ED's admins made [[lulz| a shit video]] about [[Maddox]] and Dick invited him onto the podcast. What followed was 30 minutes of [[autism]], telling everyone about what a drunken meth-head failure [[Zaiger]] is, that [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] is ran by a bunch of [[fact| lazy drunks]], and about that time [[William Atchison|a former ED mod shot up a school and only killing 2 people before getting cucked by a couch]] and bringing great shame and dishonor on Encyclopedia Dramatica by not even getting a [[High Score]]. As all Dick show fans are [[fact| an autism]] and [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] is a collector of all things autistic and autism related, it was the [[retard|special]] [[cum|moment]] that all Dick show autists we waiting to happen. EZ also shut people up correcting him that Dick Masterson was half Mexican, not Half-Greek by getting Dick to agree that [[fact| from now on he is retro-actively Greek]].
<Dragoneer[AFK]> that's what communities are made for. Working together<br>
<br>
<Anon> Others like the WYS crew?<br>
<br>
<Anon> I'd join these guys<br>
<center>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> You welcome!<br>
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<center><youtube>DCdgZo8Hav8</youtube></center>
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<Dragoneer[AFK]> Arcturus never was a good admin and never did anything good. Ever.<br>
After EZ PZ's video became one of the top search results for Maddox on [[Jewtube]] [https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=maddox (no srsly)] Maddox's [[white knight]] from [[faggot|Podhomo]] began sperging in the comments to defend m'lady [[Maddox]] and her honor. When it became clear that an admin of ED not only doesn't really give a shit about being insulted online, but communicates exclusively in internet shit talk and is more comfortable speaking that language [[homo|Jessie]] decided to threaten ED's admin with a [[lolsuit]]!
<Anon> So you prefer to see e621 under the control of a dildo factory?<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> What's wrong with that? :)<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> more seriously nobody needs e621. This site always encouraged illegal activities, Every FA artist complains about it.<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> No age check, incompetent staff.<br>
<Anon> heh yeah. when flaming your mods they could get a fucking mirror.<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> :D<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> Arc asked for it, good riddance<br>
<b><u>This would be somewhat scary if...</u></b>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> we'll have to watch the "new version" anyway.<br>
* EZ Didn't live in ((([[Isreal]]))) (aka the real masters of the [[Jewnited States of Americunts]])
<Anon> goverments changes, lies remains.<br>
* Said something that wasn't true or wasn't a joke
* Gave a shit
* Had a reputation and image he cared about
<Dragoneer[AFK]> like ten low ranking artists posting their own shit on e621.<br>
When it became clear that calling the cyber police so consequences were never the same again wasn't going to cause the video to be removed, [[Herpes|Jessica]] [[Nigger|Blum]] and Podhomo started [[delete fucking everything| false flagging and reporting the video]]. In response, EZ PZ released a "retraction" video that is a retraction in the same way [[herpes]] is a sexual performance enhancer that makes your dick ribbed for her pleasure and [[Maddox| more desirable]] to the ladies. EZ also made it clear that if the Maddox Kuckhold Kissing Krew got the video successfully taken down, he'd get it hosted on ED and get it mirrored everywhere.
<Anon> Allan reposted his whole gallery too :B<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> my bad.. 9<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> 99% of the submissions are posted without Artist's consent.<br>
<Anon> it just remains an alt. for when FA crashes.<br>
<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> Nah<br>
<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> some can't just wait a few hours without having their dose of furry porn.<br>
<center>
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<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> [[lolwut|No one wants an alternative to FA]]. No one needs it, requires personnel and a competent staff.<br>
Given the history and success of the Dick show, how much Encyclopedia Dramatica admins love trolling retards, and the fact that a sizable group of autisms will throw money at anything their Autsim Whisper passingly mentions it's predicted this Encyclopedia Dramatica admin will most likely start being linked to the C.U.N.T. "Network" (whether he wants to be or not), trick autistic Dick heads into giving him a sizable chunk of money, and make a living from the ashes of Maddox's former career. Well either that or continue to be a (((lazy drunk))), after all he is an admin for Encyclopedia Dramatica.
<Anon> Pedobunny?<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> ...to be closed soon<br>
<Anon> oh i see :3<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> also, FA's registration is back, guess this answers your question :)<br>
<Dragoneer[AFK]> I'm a WYS member, so what?<br>
== External Links ==
<Dragoneer[AFK]> I have the right to be on any community I want, say whatever I want outside FA.<br>
*http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com
<Dragoneer[AFK]> TBH I could have reported e621's illegal content myself and it would make no difference.<br>
*http://www.womenarebetterthanmen.com
<Anon> yep you're a citizen like evrybody<br>
*[http://biggest.thedickshow.com/ His old podcast with Maddox]
*[http://books.simonandschuster.com/Men-Are-Better-Than-Women/Dick-Masterson/9781416953814 His Book]
*[http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/erect-the-man-billboard/ ERECT his billboard for the lulz]
*[http://www.menarebetterthanwomen.com/forums/rss.php?c=50&f=27&t=1 An RSS feed to his hatemail]
'''[[Tl;dr]]''', Fagoneer thinks FA should be the only furry site ever and that he is a total Nazi. What is new?
{{8chan}}
{{Maddox}}
{{sex}}
{{Trolls}}
{{truth}}
===Well obviously we have a rapist in Furaffinity===
{{timeline|Featured article May 30 & 31, [[2018]]|[[Realstreamnews]]|{{PAGENAME}}|[[Aydin Paladin]]}}
Zaush "the furry rapist song"
"He's all up in your fandom, snatching your artists up, tryin' to rape 'em
So y'all need to hide yo mates, hide yo cubs hide yo mates, hide yo cubs, 'cause he's rapin everybody out here
You don't have to come and confess, we know it was you. We saw the notes. So you can run and tweet that, run and tweet that, run and tweet that, homeboy, home home homeboy.
We got yo chat logs and all them notes, you are so dumb, you are really dumb, for real.
You are really really really really so dumb. I was attacked by some creeper in the fandom.
So dumb, so dumb, so dumb so
He's all up in your fandom, snatching your artists up, tryin' to rape 'em
So y'all need to hide yo mates, hide yo cubs hide yo mates, hide yo cubs, 'cause he's rapin everybody out here
You don't have to come and confess, we know it was you. We saw the notes. So you can run and tweet that, run and tweet that, run and tweet that, homeboy, home home homeboy.
He's a popular artist, draws lots of porn, likes sizeplay, and was a swinger.
And I seen the notes when he was rapin her, and that's not all that he did.
He's all up in your fandom, snatching your artists up, tryin' to rape 'em
So y'all need to hide yo mates, hide yo cubs hide yo mates, hide yo cubs, 'cause he's rapin everybody out here
You don't have to come and confess, we know it was you. We saw the notes. So you can run and tweet that, run and tweet that, run and tweet that, homeboy, home home homeboy.
Well, obviously we have a rapist in the furry fandom. Are you serious? I have your chat logs, I have the notes, I know what you said, even though you hid, we all found out.
He's all up in your fandom, snatching your artists up, tryin' to rape 'em
So y'all need to hide yo mates, hide yo cubs hide yo mates, hide yo cubs, 'cause he's rapin everybody out here
You don't have to come and confess, we know it was you. We saw the notes. So you can run and tweet that, run and tweet that, run and tweet that, homeboy, home home homeboy."
[[File:Zaushsohorny.jpg|thumb|right|Run and tweet that, homeboy, home home homeboy~]]
A "popufur" furry named Zaush right in king fur's(dragoneer) convention raped a girl at a furcon. But rather than turn in Zaush to the cops, cause the guy constantly had money being flung at him for commissions, he told the girl who got raped to try and like it.
[[Category:People|Masterson, Dick]]
Well the victims brother didn't give a shit about "protecting the image of furry", rather than let 'neer get away with helping a rapist, he bashed right through Fa's security, with not even so much of a challenge. The brother then proceeded to wreak havoc on furaffinity. Hacking all the mods and admins, trying to get as much information to put Zaush and Dragoneer behind bars. He took screenshots of extremely damning stuff that the Admins had said and spread it all about.
[[Category:Epic Shit]]
{please post the screenshots by the hacker to get Dragoneer behind bars}
===DDoS attack and GoFundMe scam===
[[File:Dragoneer debt.png|left|300px|thumb|[[I accidentally X|"Whoops I accidentally all your money for personal debt"]]]]
[[file:Massive_furry_ddos_dragoneer_tweet.jpg|220px|thumb|Down, down it goes.]]
During October 2014, a massive [[DDOS]] attack struck the world of [[furry art]], taking [[FurAffinity]] and SoFurry completely off the internet for a few days, and temporarily knocking other anthro porn sites such as [[Inkbunny]] and Weasyl offline. Dragoneer was named prime suspect after it was revealed that a fundraiser which had been set up after the attack to protect against future attacks [http://pbs.twimg.com/media/B0Ls25UIQAMNtX-.png:large had in fact been created hours *before*] the actual attack. [http://www.reddit.com/r/furry/comments/2jk5mv/breaking_furaffinity_fundraiser_page_created/clcj66p He responds] by claiming it was coincidental [[Bullshit|shitty timing]] 3 times in a single post.
GoFundMe pulled the plug on the fundraiser and suspended his account after evidence that it was a scam was brought to light (as if supporting cartoon animal pornography wasn't a good enough reason to start), but later [http://twitter.com/Dragoneer/status/523611919978987521 reinstated his account] so he could still collect the money and user names of everyone he managed to scam.
This happened 2 months after he had set up another [http://www.gofundme.com/7paw6o GoFundMe drive] just so [http://www.furaffinity.net/journal/6048518/ he could buy himself] a new Cintiq tablet. More coincidental timing, right? The selfish goal of $2,500 was reached by 17 [[Furfags|people]] in 7 months, including $200 from his dumb fiance [[FurAffinity#Sciggles|Sciggles]].
===Programmer Is Denied Payment and IMVU Intervenes===
It recently got exposed that a programmer that's been working with Dragoneer's seed-stained wall of a site since October of 2015, and it further got released in a recent discussion video said programmer posted [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=30eEXUnoKus&feature=youtu.be (which is viewable here)], that he found out he's essentially been working for free and Dragoneer and staff registered his work contract to [[IMVU]]. Thankfully, IMVU actually decided to be badass and swiftly [[Justice|kicked the living shit]] out of Dragoneer for refusing to pay his coder his past dues. Now, we're gonna cease even getting into how much of a worthless lump of cunt juice Sean [[Bitch|Bitche]] is. Since it's been obvious since the first sentence of this article that Dragoneer doesn't give a fuck about anything aside from consuming mass amounts of food to keep his [[Tubgirl|"Hershey Kiss"]] body shape that he's accustomed to. The heart of the matter here is despite a community fully comprised of closeted homosexuals that barely missed the hook of the wire hanger, it's pretty shitty to deny a programmer his payments when he's been helping to work on your website full-time for months on end without any compensation whatsoever. [[Shit nobody cares about|If this doesn't tell you this community is becoming corrupted by its own fatass cocksuckers, I don't know what does.]]
The point of this story is Dragoneer is conducting illegal behavior by denying his own "employees" payments. So suffice to say, Dragoneer deserves to have some form of legal litigation put against him. Especially since said programmer was determined to help initiate new code to replace the shitty fucking toddler level code that the site has been using that's on the level of an old HTML site from the late 90s. But it turns out these [[cuntpaste|cuntpastes]] don't take too kindly to positive change with their code. Codes that's by the way, that's so out of date it might as well be dressed with powdered wigs. We can only hope something develops further out of this situation, mostly because it'd be funny to see Dragoneer turn up the waterworks over any form of legal action against him so he can go into a food eating depression and kill himself from cholesterol poisoning.
We can only hope.
But alas, it turns out that the payment that IMVU forced out of Dragoneer has been fully processed, and there is no longer a call for legal action. I guess that means we can leave Dragoneer alone on this matter.
Sorry, that was a shitty joke. We're still more than obligated to shit all over his fat ham-glazed face.
==Gallery of Horrors==
Dragoneer can [[trace|draw]], too! Actually, all he can draw is gay Digimon porn, but occasionally he requests himself raping people he hates or have banned.
Image:I Believe In Sean Piche.jpg|thumb|Quick, Chase! To the Fatcave!
Image:1275282975.dragoneer_neersuit.png|What a [[fag|rebel]]!
Image:1274390669.dragoneer_fau3_badges.jpg|Note: the background of this picture is a wallpaper by [[http://ker-.deviantart.com/art/Mario-World-HD-19771526 some vector artist]] used by Dragoneer without permission for [[advertising]] his furry convention, FA:United. [[Lawsuit]]?
image:Jarate.png | Use as a Team Fortress 2 spray. He plays on the Furry Pound servers.
Image:Neerallan.jpg|Dragoneer killing [[Allan]]. Inspired [[patachu|some artist]] to draw the exact opposite. He got permanently banned for this.
Image:1279445288.dragoneer_dgr-aquilus_sketch_.jpg|Cocks, cocks, and more cocks. Dragoneer's entire gallery is about the same thing: gay dinosaur porn.
Image:Dragoneer_01.jpg|Dragoneer designed his own [[dildo]]. He loves himself so much, he dreams about getting anally raped by his own fursona.
Image:1277577957.dragoneer_fend_n_neer.jpg|Your donations at work! Here are a couple of fursuits owned by Sean Piche. A Preyfar fursuit is in the making.
Image:Fagoneer.png|Dicks Everywhere!
Image:Preyfarpg2.jpg |Dragoneer's Preyfar character (the [[Gay|purple]] hyena) appears in an unfinished cub comic.
Image:Preyfarpg3real.jpg
Image:1276478521.shiuk page 4.jpg
Image:Dragoneercomic_page_5.jpg|[http://web.archive.org/web/20070111083224/http://www.nothingkat.com/downloads/FALog110606.txt <~Dragoneer> I hate the stuff (cub porn) immensely myself.]
Image:Dragoneercomic_page_6.jpg|The rest of the files for the comic were "corrupted". GEE I WONDER WHAT HAPPENS AFTER THIS. (Sources say the rest appeared in Softpaw Magazine, if you're a sick fuck who owns this issue, please upload the rest for epic lolz and one million internets).
Image:sp4back.jpg|Here's the back cover of Softpaw 4, featuring Preyfar and Crome.
Image:Dragoneerassgas.jpg|[[Wut]]
Image:smelly dumb dragoneer scum.jpg
File:dragoneer_lunch.png|Dragoneer preparing a completely normal lunch at FA:U
Image:Sean_Piche_And_Alcohool.png|Geez, this guy needs a life.
Image:Dragoneerfourloko.jpeg|Getting drunk on Four Loko and liveblogging about it is one of Dragoneer's favorite hobbies.
File:Ferrox LLC.png|Pennsylvania Department of Revenue registration for Ferrox LLC.
File:Dragoneer debt.png|Oy Vey! The goyim know!
</gallery>}}
==Butt Devastated==
[[File:DragoneerJournal.png|thumb|Dragoneer's journal on the subject.]]
Perhaps as divine karma for letting [[Allan]] [[Allan#Back_on_FurAffinity|back on FurAffinity]], Dragoneer lost about 75% of his "valuable" [[Plastic crap|collectibles and memorabilia]].
All together now: [[And nothing of value was lost]].
==Trivia==
[[File:Zaushblacksquares.png|right|thumb|If anyone else did this, they'd meet the [[banhammer]].]]
*Dragoneer is a secret [[babyfur]]. <strike>This is why cub art is still allowed on FurAffinity, regardless</strike> of it being shit. He even told the [[UK]] users to [[GTFO]] when their lolicon ban came in.
*His best friend is a sex offending [[pedophile]] who got banned from FurAffinity, but still gets to see kids in real life.
*Every administrator he has ever hired has been a pedophile/zoophile/anal retentive [[Nazi]] bastard, most notably the notorious dogfucker known as Chase.
*His nephew date-raped a girl, went on a crime spree, then got busted trying to steal some of Dragoneer's shit at his mother's house.
*If Dragoneer posts something on his blog, everyone must agree with it. ALWAYS.
*FA isn't his website. He stole it in 2006 when he was just a lead moderator. He claimed that he invested over $2,000 in donations to become "legit". Having all the moderators on your site sure helps!
*It is a known fact that Dragoneer relaxes the rules to his [[sick fuck|favorite]] artists. For example, in April 2010 [[Adam Wan]] [[Delete fucking everything|DELETED FUCKING EVERYTHING]] from his gallery and replaced each submission with a black square. Even though that's [http://wiki.furaffinity.net/index.php?title=AUP in direct violation of multiple portions of the AUP], Dragoneer said nothing and refused to do anything about it.
*[[Glenn Beck|Dragoneer raped and murdered a young girl in 1990]].
*[[WTF|Former president of the United States Barack Obama follows Dragoneer on Twitter, for some reason.]]
|“Because they're mass [[hacking]] accounts, using [[phishing]] techniques and other shitty script-level methods to [[steal|hijack]] people's shit (mostly due to people's own stupidity) and he's doing it in your name.”| –Dragoneer, [[rage|raging]] over [[raeped]] users
|"I don't want to rotate banners, as that's very bandwidth heavy and would be a little counter-productive. I'm not AGAINST it, but I don't want to."| -[[Doing it wrong|Administrating a website doesn't require work.]]
|“You had severe resentment towards us over it, but you've always been civil to me... so I dunno”| - A very confused Neer
|"I generally [[Lie|never]] go to ED. <nowiki>"Facts"</nowiki> are sometimes optional there."| -Dragoneer
|"Dragoneer is a thief. What right does he have to harass [[Allan]] for swindling donation money when he's doing the same thing and far worse? The site's layout is using something that would be fine 10 years ago but many sites have better, the servers are junk, the staff are all pedos. He hires friends and incompetents to mod the site while openly allowing popular people and friends to break rules and do what the fuck they want.
Fursuits, iPhones used as bread, commissions, name it, he's not spending money on the site. If he were, the site would be better."| -Anonymous
|"When I met Dragoneer at AC, it was really disturbing, for, he had no other subjects than his characters and who drew them. I really had a weird feeling, like having a 12yo in front of me into his Digimon games... Sean (Dragoneer) is devoid of maturity. Just like a kid in middle school who bullies others around, he tries to be a smartass toward those who are around him, including; and especially artists. ''look; here's V**** this guy sucks, he thinks he's better than N**** but he's just a ripoff.'' Meeting Sean like this really made me feel bad for frequenting such retards."| -An anonymous artist
|"Furaffinity is free, unlike Deviantart who charges you to access certain content, options and discussion boards, that's the reason why I decided to create Furaffinity. Freedom and respect versus profit altough we are not a paysite, hosting Furaffinity requires a budget so we let the freedom to the users to donate, and these users are granted of my respect and my interest."| -Dragoneer, being hypocrite
|"No, Deviantart is the wrong site to go if you want to get a name in this community, that's the reason why I created [Furaffinity] Y'know, the photoshop artists like Axer, Vaporotem or Barachan may be blindfolded by the pageviews they make here, but they only support an egoistical administration that doesn't give a fuck or know shit about the furry culture, and the few members like Skifi, who actually play a role of mediator here; are even more retarded for not seeing the truth."| -Dragoneer, publicly admitting he hate Deviantart on IRC
|"Why do you want an alternative to Furaffinity? We're here for good."| -Dragoneer
*[http://faleaks.malicelabs.com/from/Ferality/ Dragoneer telling a rape victim from his site to STFU because he doesn't want to lose all the traffic. Greed much?]
*http://e621.net/post/show/51542/
*http://fagoneer.tk
*[https://kiwifarms.net/threads/dragoneer-preyfar-firepyro-sean-piche-spottybitch-princess-piche.34077/ Forum about Dragoneer]
Please take note anyone can still edit your Sandbox. You shouldn't worry that much about that and on the bright side, it encourages collaboration and improvement.
If you accidentally deleted what you worked on, do not worry! Check your page history in order to retrieve your previous work!
You may do whatever you want here, but do not turn this page into a redirect or remove this template, it would be counterintuitive.
To Admins/EDitors: This page should not be locked at any time.
Dick Masterson (aka Dax Herrera), is a messenger from God sent to enlightenwomen around the world about why everything sucks because of them, and this consequently makes him the greatest human being alive. His IRL trolling is not only noteworthy for the lulz it has generated over the years, but the fact that so many fall for such obvious bait creates a weird meta-troll effect where he's proven right due to the hordes of butthurt bitches left in his path. His trolling never just stopped at pissing off wimminz though, motivated via the vindictive antics of a certain former associate of his, he took his trolling to new heights by engaging in some of the biggest shitposts in his career, including entertaining Maddox's $380 million lolsuit.
Dick Masterson is also a CalTech honors graduate with a doctorate in rocket science. No, seriously!he actually talked about making rockets and drones that kill terrorists for his day job. Sorry ladies, so much for him being a retard that doesn't have any clue what he is talking about. When a butthurt psychobitch snitched on him, writing to his family and employers to cut off his penis, it was soon revealed his employer could care less since rocket scientists weren't exactly commonplace, he kept doing whatever he wanted to, living his life like the drunken degenerate virgin king supreme.
So, women despise him, men and /b/tards want to BE him, and trollsWISH they could be him. God bless you Dax Herrera, consider this ED article as your #1 fanpage.
At least 100 years ago, Dick owned a website titled menarebetterthanwomen.com, through which he shared his infinite wisdom with fellow assholes and chauvinists on the internet. Having an advanced degree in Dickology, Dick has written many classic works, including this list of reasons on why men are way better than women, something he would turn into a bestseller on and even translated that into a #1 bestselling book on Amazon. The site has remained inactive as of 2010, largely due to the popularity of the video media he produced for JewTube.
Dick:women line up to go out with me! Her:I don't see any women lining up to go out with you, and even if there were, I would be at the end of that line. Dick:Well if you hit the treadmill more, you'd be at the front.
This is an example of a technique Dick pioneered known as the "Verbal Cunt Punt" or VCP for short. It allows dick to turn raging Feminazis back into respectable women without the need to punch or kick their filthy untouched snatches.
Top 10 Reasons why Men are Better than Women
“
Having a penis — in other words looking like a man and having man parts — is a man’s way of telling other men, ‘Hey. Look at me. I’m a man. I won’t fuck up whatever it is that you’re trying to do.
„
—10. Men have penises
“
Marriage was invented because women were too busy whoring it out to fuck the only the guy who was paying their rent and feeding their fat asses French bon-bons every day.
„
—9. Marriage is stupid
“
Men are natural destroyers. We pop right out of the man-womb and start on a life-long tirade of progress by tearing down the Earth with our mighty, man-manly man-fists. Goddammit, that’s awesome!
„
—8. Boys destroy things
“
Women don’t wear watches; they wear bracelets. Women wearing bracelets is like dropping a bus of retarded kids off in front of a taffy pulling machine. They can just stare for hours and never get bored.
„
—7. Men wear watches
“
Writing is stupid and an ineffective way to communicate. Men know this so they don’t give a shit about handwriting things with big hoops and loops and squiggles and shit so aliens can read notes about remembering to pick up your birth control pills after 6th period from space.
„
—6. Men write illegibly
“
Men know this so they blast off from birth like shooting man stars — burning out ten years faster, but setting the whole night ablaze with manness. Women just kind of lie around like big fat pigs in big fat puddles of shit.
„
—5. Men live less than women
“
Women’s entire lives and social circles are based around hatred.
„
—4. Women are racists
“
Women are social chameleons — or better yet: social vampires.
„
—3. Men are not sponges
“
I believe all women suffer from a mild and extremely localized form of Tourette Syndrome. The afflicted organ? Their tongues.
„
—2. Men do not have Tourette Syndrome
“
Whether or not you believe in Jesus, there is one fact you can’t argue with: he was a man. No religion anywhere has ever put a woman in charge of shit. That’s called dogma — man-dogma — and it means men are better than women.
Dr. Phil without makeupA typical reaction to the truth. Fucking priceless.
Users editing another wiki entirely have spent way more time documenting this bit of internet history you can check that out here
Possibly the most well known and prodigious first appearance of Dick Masterson would have been his very first appearance on Dr. Phil, a Los Angeles-based tabloid talk show hosted by the human thumb from Spy Kids. Dick appeared as his bombastic, chauvinistic self as a featured guest, and once again on the Dr. Phil House mini-series, amid a slew of other guests with similar views. This was essentially a trashy reality TV show where people are exploited for the entertainment of the low-IQ viewers watching that shit. Dick's steadfast approach to criticism as well as his magnetic charisma cemented him as an agent provocateur, inciting self-professed feminists to express their true feelings and views. He simply states a general view about women, and then feminazis, dykes and faggots bombard him with death and castration threats, often accompanied by a generalized claim about men, at which point he exploited their own views for the lulz.
Dr. Phil was so humiliated by the episodes, according to Dick, that he ordered the House of Judgement segments to be cut months after their initial airing, and were eventually BAWWWleeted from the Dr. Phil archive. Later it was revealed that Shirley Dieu (a fictionalized and faked personality created solely for Dick to poke fun at) revealed she had sued Dr. Phil for deceptive business practices and a range of other issues. She revealed that everyone's possessions were confiscated by the production team (including their cell phones), the catering was intentionally terrible and all the guests were forced to share the same bathrooms. Possibly the most egregious thing that happened during filming was a random naked guy literally showing up and exposing their genitalia to the contestants.
Dick placed a $1,000 bounty for the original cuts of the show, which he honored when some Sweedish dickhead somehow ripped a copy from the Swedish National Archive of Recorded Sound and Moving Images, which you can see below.
"Should have stayed in the kitchen where you were safe"
"You're paying for the whore to leave"
Previous Video | Next Video
The Biggest Problem in the Universe
The polarity between the hosts masculinity is uncanny afThen he got an idea. An awful idea. The cuck got a wonderful, awful idea!
On May 20th, 2014, Masterson started a podcast called The Biggest Problem in the Universe with co-host and mutual acquaintance Maddox. The Podcast was pretty pretty awwright at the beginning, but what made the show lulzy was that the entire premise of the show was Dick trolling the shit out of this autistic 40 year old balding Armeniancuck, bringing his overbearingly masculine shit-talking game to the fore and instigating massive chimpouts from his co-host. Over time, the show's fanbase gravitated towards Dick, voting his problems over Maddox's. While Dick really didn't give a shit since this show was just a framing device to allow them to air their pet peeves, Maddox would take this personally and seethe with anger whenever it was brought up. Things that Dick talked about include:
Getting so drunk he took a shit in his fathers pants
Only doing cool drugs
Never using condoms during sex
Talking about how global warming is made up
Talking about how swearing and saying retard isn't cool
White knighting for female guest and getting his jimmies rustled when called out for being a white knight
Forcing Maddox to watch Titanic every time he brought a problem that was shit
On May 31st, 2016, Maddox abruptly cancelled the successful 107 episode Podcast (not including bonus content) due to Maddox being upset that Dick was having sex with his ex girlfriend (whom Maddox had been broken up with for 3 years, and happened while he was already dating his current live in girlfriend). Being cucked by Masterson, he killed the podcast and begun to wage a never-ending war to ruin Dick's personal and professional reputation. On September 25th, 2016, Maddox posted a character assassination video in which he attempted to spin an innocuous statement by Masterson, where he stated that if a woman fell asleep in a bar, she should expect to be taken sexual advantage of because it is a natural consequence of the situation. With this dogwhistle the helldogs of the SJW world descended upon him, leading to his dismissal from Upright Citizen's Brigade(some gay improv group in NYC). Dick refused to disown any of his work, even in the face of threats, and stood by every word he has ever written on his website and in his book (unlike Maddox, who did).
Some time after the drama reddit user Antoids(Archive 1) unleashed the full force of his autism and painstakingly edited every single episode of the podcast to reveal a slew of content that was cut from production. Most of it was Maddox incomprehensibly stammering like Porky Pig, but there were still large chunks of stuff removed where Dick was either laughing at Maddox, joking at his expense, making him look like a dumbass and so on. You can view evidence of this here.
The Dick Show
Ted Kaczynski took the fall for Dick
Sam Hyde's Lost MDE sketch exclusive
The Ballad of Mansplaining
Mansplainception
How the victory of Donald Trump will be
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Following the untimely death of The Biggest Problem in the Universe, Masterson started his own Podcast called The Dick Show. Weekly tidbits of Hot Goss are distributed like Orange Chicken samples in a supermarket. Hosting the show with him is his co-host Sean Jacobson, and his audio engineer Asterios Kokanos, and a rotating cast of recurring guests, including Lowtax, MadCucks (Trevor Brit), and some weirdo Dick called Steve met once at a Burning Man gig. While the show can be entertaining since it started off being slapped together last minute and devolved into a male soap opera of drama and gossip, and as a result requires the listener to have TL;DR context and backstory of drama involving an dead podcast, then listen to all episodes in chronological order; otherwise, entire 30 minute chunks of an episode make absolutely no sense. Despite being possibly the most TL;DR Podcast in human history that requires more back story and cliff notes than Dungeons & Dragons, it is ranked in the top 20 highest grossing Patreons.
Dick Masterson: Autism Whisperer
In the ashes of Dick Masterson proved to have a very useful weapon in his arsenal that Maddox did not count on. What does a man do when his former business partner attacks him, organizes a smear campaign against him, and leaves you with a fan base full of autistic sperglords? Like the legendary chippo man of yore, you weaponize that autism into your very own personal army.
When Maddox's attack failed miserably and backfired, fans of TDS kicked in a whopping $18,465 (2/2/17) to the Dick fund, spiralling him into a 24-hour, 7 day a week alcoholic rage, condensed into an hour and a half long Podcast.
Dick then channelled the power of autism to outsource the work of finding examples of Maddox advocating sexual assault, causing Maddox to disavow his only successful book. Another autist with far too much time on his hands decided to go through the accounting ledger to show Maddox was lying about his financial claims and actually owed Dick over $5,000. Another poster on the board (Trevor Brit) became a long-term contributor on TDS as a not so subtle parody of Maddox, and ended up earning more money on Patreon than the real Maddox. They then decided to do some epic trolling by purchasing domains related to Maddox and all people associated with Madcast media, troll Maddox's Twitch stream, create a #1 charting comedy album about what a cuck faggot Maddox is and chart higher Maddox's #4 charting comedy album, and pick apart the content of his new book to prove that the entire thing is Maddox recycling old rants from Biggest Problem in the Universe.
Dick has weaponized autism by separating his audience into two catagories: top autist and bottom autist. He incentivizes weaponized autism by giving autists 'life advice' in a simple to understand way even a retard can understand and mocking them when there is too much tism (aka labeling them a bottom autist). Dick is able to do this because he is an autism himself, however instead of focusing his autism into Thomas the Tank Engine and Sonic, he focused it on guns, bombs, telling women they are inferior to men, and trolling. Basicly Dick is /pol/ IRL, minus being half spic and(as of January 2018, Dick is retroactively half Greek) loving jews.
(Yes, a top autist parody of Maddox actually makes more money than the real Maddox.)
HOT GOSS: Dick vs Maddox & Other Associated Drama
When Dick and Maddox broke up due to 'Autistic differences,' Dick attempted to end things as nice as he could saying Maddox was a legend and he was grateful for the opportunity tohost a podcast with him. However, because Maddox is incapable of acting like an adult and both of them are notorious internet trolls, this quickly dissolved and turned into a Battle Royale-grade free for all. As Maddox had already pissed off his fans by killing the podcast they loved and becoming an unfunny cuck, Maddox took the coward's way forward sneaking around implying shit he couldn't back up about Dick and sending his employees to dox, harass employers, and do his general dirty work while publicly pretending to be above it all and to be a good boy who dindu nuffin. Dick, secure in the fact that Maddox made a flaming bitch of himself on his side, handled it like a man by publicly airing his dirty laundry and shaming him. Dick later got a bit more creative and him as well as his army of people who hated Maddox decided to have some fun and:
Create Billboard charting albums about what a cuck Maddox is to out sell his album,
Create a parody of Maddox called Madcucks,
Buy a billboard outside of Madcast Media's official P.O. Box saying what a cuck Maddox is,
Release bonus content from Madcucks that outsells Maddox's bonus content,
Establish a "podcast network" that isn't even really a network, but is still more popular and gets more downloads than Maddox's official Madcast Media network that he hyped up for over 2 years to relase shortly before his book,
Shit talk Maddox's sponsors,
Explain how Maddox makes his money off shirts by selling shitty quality Guildan shirts,
Buy the domain to the super secret domain that Maddox was originally going to name his book,
Release a Madcucks book with that same exact name making fun of what a faggot cuck Maddox is,
Release the financial records of Biggest Problem in the Universe,
Make fun of guests that go on Maddox's show,
Get a restraining order against his current girlfriend Jessica "M3ntal Jess" Blum,
Troll his twitch stream,
Shit on Maddox's podcast reviews,
Leak Maddox's chat logs,
Poach Maddox's audio engineer and making him co-host in exchange for him never working for Maddox again,
Take the Patreon name Maddox,
And sue Maddox of trademark patent disputes.
Dick soon learned just from his own personal beef with Maddox that Drama was profitable and makes for quality content. Other Drama sagas on his podcast include (but are not limited to):
Getting a mod of /r/the_donald to Box a liberal faggot greek Asterios whose only stated training regimen was to "get as fat and train as little as possible just like the real Donald Trump"... and the /r/the_donald mod lost!
Everyone forever mocking the losing mod's girlfriend, a furfag cat-kin
Having a fan almost kill himself on air (see Valentine's Day Massacre)
Inviting Null on as a guest and as a result KiwiFarms getting shut down the next day
Inviting Mike Cernovich on as a guest and then letting his writers and fans mercilessly mock and ridicule Thernovich ever since
A war between his facebook and reddit group who hate and fuck with each other all the time
Advising listeners to drink wrecklessly and do only the cool drugs.
Best debate in the universe: Brought to you by Dick Masterson
After winning his lolsuit, Dick was upset. He wasn't ready for the fun of laughing at Maddox to end and all Maddox wanted to do now was cry in his cuck shed alone and pretend he never tried to do something so retarded. So to spice things up after Maddox released his nuclear option that blew up in his own face, Dick decided on Episode 113 of Biggest Problem in the 2niverse: The search for more money and less Dick Best Debate in Universe to give Maddox, just the Tip of what is looking to be a hilarious future series of dickings Maddox's anus was never prepared for:
To further help Maddox, Dick decided to send his listeners to Maddox's $30,000 website and use his voting system to vote on what new podcast would be allowed on the C.U.N.T network. This caused Maddox to go into a full on autistic rage as he takes voting on his websites super seriously. First attempting to cry to apple to get his iTunes feed that actually has subscribers back. Then getting butthurt and tampering with his own voting to fuck with Dick. To going into such a delusional world of denial he is refusing to address the sickest burn that could possibly happen to Maddox: he is trying to pass off the increase bump in web traffic as legit traffic to his shit show's website.
However, internet Lawsplainer Nick Rekieta explained what the funniest part of all this is (beyond just the lulz of Dick fucking with the feed and using it to shit on Maddox), because Dick was the owner and allowed Maddox to pull his bullshit for over 2 year, Dick can legally and rightfully bill Maddox for all the time he allowed Maddox to use his iTunes feed to upload a shitty podcast.
A full TL;DR break down of how Maddox got cucked out of his own iTunes feed
Dick still owns the iTunes feed because Apple is not going to disregard property law to appease a crying bald faggot who talked shit about them for years, and has said when it comes to his ways to fuck with Maddox, this isn't even his final form.
Destiny Baits Dick into Autsim thunder dome
"I'm not triggered you shithead"Dick knows how to stay calm...also TL;DW
Last tuesday, Destiny used his autism to successfully bait Dick into a "debate." This however was a 'debate' in the the same way autistic screeching is a conversation. Dick being a drunken rage filled asshole who is too lazy to research twitch attention whores, fell into a trap and admittedly he did not perform well in. Destiny accomplished this by making the whole thing about Trump after Dick explicitly said he didn't want to talk about Trump. Destiny using his adderall enhanced autism to find Dick's weakness.
DesTINY shows Dick whose the bigger man
Dick goes up against literally anyone anyone who challenges him like a drunk rage filled asshole
Dick is too lazy to research anything
Dick lets others lead the direction of the conversation to shit on where they take it
Dick is a 24 hour rage
DesTINY demonstrates what physique a master debater should strive forDesTINY may be cumming up short, but at least he never cums up bald
As a result, Dick performed like shit. What was not supposed to be a debate and not supposed to be about Trump and supposed to be about how the way Destiny argues is a cherry picked exercise in confirmation bias that has made the internet and people shittier and unable to communicate, turned into a debate about Trump. When trying to get off the topic, Destiny challeneges Dick's masculinity and accuses him of being a triggered snowflake needing the topic to be changed to keep him engaged in shit he really didn't care about talking about. Around waaaaaay top long into this "debate," Dick finally stops giving a shit and starts making fun of Destiny for being a midget. You could delude yourself into seeing this as some sort of meta-win for Dick as Dick's original statement that the way Destiny talks to people is not an actual conversation, its just autistic screeching to jerk off your ego to appeal to confirmation biases of you audience of tards over click bait talking points; but you can never take a circus midget seriously for over 30 minutes and be considered a "winner" in any way. Dick looked foolish for this, knew it, and openly admits he fucked up by letting Destiny change the subject, use sophistry tricks, and drill down into talking points into a point of absurdity. Destiny immediately declared himself a winner, which is true in the sense that when two special ed students screech at each other in tard rage the one who is louder is the "winner". Destiny also considers it a badge of pride in triggering that he got a guy who is known for a rage based podcast that screams all the time and never does any research and argues from pathos to scream at him and not have researched sourced facts to support his arguments. Destiny's autism truly shines through at the end of the interview:
“
DICK: I guess in the argument department I came up a little SHORT *laughs* you know what thats like. DESTINY: At least I didn't come up a little bald *Hangs up immediately* GOT HIM!
„
—Destiny proving Dick's original point that the way Destiny talks to people is not an actual conversation, its just autistic screeching to jerk off your ego to appeal to confirmation biases of you audience of tards over click bait talking points was wrong by debating that Drumpf is bad.
Dick also has a long list of enemies of the Dick show who he personally will punch in the face the moment an opportunity arises where he can and legally get away with it. This includes, but is not limited to:
Maddox
Destiny
Madcast media
Tim Pool
Elon Musk
Bill Nye
Neil DeGrasse Tyson
Mark Maron
All members of Last Podcast on the Left
Everyone at Cracked.com and it's affiliated podcasts
Amy Schumer
Security Guards
The Police
All employees of the US government (excluding military)
Dick Masterson: Zionist shill?
While Dick doesn't talk about the Jews a lot, it has occasionally come up and has made statements sounding like he want to suck circumcised cock.
Dax speaking out against der fuhrer
While it's unclear if he just fucking around or if Dax secretly worships the children of satan, you should trust Dick as much as you would trust any Isreali. There is a good chance Dick will try and fuck your girlfriend, take your population of fans, and claim he has an ancestral right to it as he lawyers up and rapes you in court.
The Valentine's Day Massacre
On February 14th, 2017, Dustin, a random guy who had made a Facebook page for the show and appointed himself Moderator, brought 3 of the saddest stories to the bonus episode, at one point leaving listeners wondering if the current caller had killed himself. Among the other callers were a sexually-abused and near-homeless trap and a guy with.. well, with just a shitty life. Mind you, he brought these callers into a comedy show. Dustin, as a result of his actions, was sentenced to a day in the stocks down at the marketplace where customers could hiss and curse at him, along with the occasional golden shower.
After EZ PZ's video became one of the top search results for Maddox on Jewtube(no srsly) Maddox's white knight from Podhomo began sperging in the comments to defend m'lady Maddox and her honor. When it became clear that an admin of ED not only doesn't really give a shit about being insulted online, but communicates exclusively in internet shit talk and is more comfortable speaking that language Jessie decided to threaten ED's admin with a lolsuit!
When it became clear that calling the cyber police so consequences were never the same again wasn't going to cause the video to be removed, JessicaBlum and Podhomo started false flagging and reporting the video. In response, EZ PZ released a "retraction" video that is a retraction in the same way herpes is a sexual performance enhancer that makes your dick ribbed for her pleasure and more desirable to the ladies. EZ also made it clear that if the Maddox Kuckhold Kissing Krew got the video successfully taken down, he'd get it hosted on ED and get it mirrored everywhere.
Given the history and success of the Dick show, how much Encyclopedia Dramatica admins love trolling retards, and the fact that a sizable group of autisms will throw money at anything their Autsim Whisper passingly mentions it's predicted this Encyclopedia Dramatica admin will most likely start being linked to the C.U.N.T. "Network" (whether he wants to be or not), trick autistic Dick heads into giving him a sizable chunk of money, and make a living from the ashes of Maddox's former career. Well either that or continue to be a (((lazy drunk))), after all he is an admin for Encyclopedia Dramatica.
BigMeatHuggins22/Sandbox is part of The Best Series in the Universe ★ ★ ★
[SE THE KEYWORD IS THAT THE PERSON BEING CUCKOLDED ENJOYS WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE HAVE SEXTHERE'S NOTHING REALLY INHERENTLY WRONG WITH BEING A CUCKOLD BECAU]
Essential Characters •
Madcast Media Network ★ ★ ★ •
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Key Concepts Click topics to expand
Antoids (Archive 1) unleashed the full force of his autism and painstakingly edited every single episode of the podcast to reveal a slew of content that was cut from production. Most of it was Maddox incomprehensibly stammering like Porky Pig, but there were still large chunks of stuff removed where Dick was either laughing at Maddox, joking at his expense, making him look like a dumbass and so on. You can view evidence of this here.
