Baldi's Basics

Welcome to the short bus.

Baldi's Basics in Education and Learning is a kewl new indie edutainment game by mystman12 (Powerword: Micah McGonigal) that is essentially the unholy bastard child of Five Nights at Freddy's, Slender: The Eight Pages, Undertale and Doki Doki Literature Club. Despite being marketed as a "horror" game, the only things that are actually horrific about the game are its atrocious Windows 95 graphics and the fact that numerous Let's Plays by faggy YouTube attention whores such as PooDiePie and Shartiplier have helped make this absolute trash of a game into the most autistic fad to hit the internet since Ugandan Knuckles. The game is also notable for being developed in 2 hours in MS Paint.

The game's sorry excuse for a "plot" revolves around attempting to locate 7 notebooks and answer 3rd grade math problems while your teacher—the titular Baldi—chases you around the school and attempts to anally rape you with a wooden ruler should you answer any of his questions wrong. Because your shitty computer is still fucked up due to Monika, after answering five of Baldi's questions the game glitches out and gives you a garbled mass of Zalgo text that forces you to fail and submit to a brutal raping from Baldi.

The "Characters"

Baldi

Baldi, as he appears in the anime.

A teacher who enjoys beating his most autistic student with a ruler.

Playtime

An annoying little MS Paint cunt who forces you to play jump rope and deserves to die in a school shooting.

Principal of the Thing

No running in the halls. No gay sex in the halls. No redeeming qualities in my game in the halls.

Gotta Sweep

A haunted broom that's possessed by the vengeful spirit of Fat Albert.

1st Prize

Stephen Hawking.

Arts and Crafters

Literally a fucking sockpuppet.

It's a Bully

This is a bully.

Galleria de Autism

Baldi's Basics in 13-Year-Old Fantards and Autism About missing Pics

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  No exceptions.
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  GOTTA SWEEP SWEEP SWEEP

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

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  Doki Doki Autism Club
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  Looks like we're finally siding with the ponies for once.

Videos

Some better games. Pure autism. Previous Video | Next Video

See Also

• Baldi's Basics in Journalism and Child Porn
• Five Nights at Freddy's
• Slender: The Eight Pages
• Undertale
• Doki Doki Literature Club
• Autism
• Cancer

Baldi's Basics is part of a series on Gaming Visit the Gaming Portal for complete coverage.

Baldi's Basics is part of a series on Aspies.

[Back to your happy placeSperg out]

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