Monica Punk

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Monica Punk is a fat, lesbian autistic with no job who lives at her mom's house, plays 20 instruments despite obviously having learned to play zaro, uploads 50 videos on YouTube a day and thinks she is in a gang despite the fact she calls the police crying when people troll her on the internet.

You can take this job and stick it

Monica a whale that is both wide he she is boring, who posted a video where she tempraphobically repeats "...I just...don't want a job", whinging about how she was dropped from Hot Topic because she was too lazy to work there. Now that's lazy! She also thinks that she's somehow better than everybody else because she's lazy. Some flaming ensued, followed by a whine-one-one call in a following video, (no, really).

Since leaving her job, she has decided to become a waste of space paid for by tax slaves, to sit on her fat ass, explaining (badly) about how she got there in the first place, and why she can't be bothered working at all.

Of course, Monica ~~has forgotten~~ never really understood in the firstplace, that if you are on social security that if you reveal to the entire world via Social Media that you are too lazy to even fucking think - then eventually somebody at social security will take your moniez away due to the fact aren't fucking trying at all.

Monica claims to be about - and we quote here: "Fun and games" despite the fact that she's the most boring individual you will ever come across, and therefore the last person you would want to have fun and games with. She's also the last person you'd ever want to sleep with - because her videos all use the Fat Girl Angle Shot shot - which doesn't exactly hide much of her fat to begin with. It's a good thing Monica is too lazy to swim, because should she ever do so, the Japanese will fill her back with harpoons.

	“	I'm actually too lazy to die	„
	—Monica Punk

	“	When are you going to shut up and cook the dinner?	„
	—What Monica's careers guidance councilor should be asking her.

The following video has been rated 'R' for 'Retarded' by ED film censors.

How the fuck chicks as lazy as this manage to break their arms...oh wait - she probably slept on it, or tried to eat it because she was too lazy to go to the fridge - which probably had no food in it because she's also too lazy to go down to the shop - or to get a job to purchase food to begin with.

Autistic artistic

Like all emo/goths, Monica claims that she 'creates' art, although this is indeed a rare find - probably as there never was any to begin with - as Monica is actually lazier than Chris Chan - even rarer! Monica is too lazy to even get a Deviantart account - and that's before she posts on it - because Monica says after this statement in her initial video "...Urm...I don't believe in working" which is somewhat contradictory as to draw something is to work on a drawing - unless of course her 'art' consists of her making ass-print patterns on her sofa.

Stop bullying me! Baaawwwww!

In full emo form, Monica produced a second video, because enraged social media warriors who had started flame wars on the youtube comments section, had told her to not be lazy and get a job.

What was amusing was Monica's half-assed attempt at producing a video asking people to not bully her because of her last video. For this video, which was such a lazy production, she didn't even move her lips, because she was expecting to get the court's answerphone system to do all the talking which also conveniently taking on her e-writ - taking all the work out of her complaint.

If Monica could only be outgoing enough to make a half decent lie, then perhaps she might be taken seriously - but she won't, so she is now left not only a fat cow, but a lolcow.

Unfortunately - like everything about Monica, she couldn't be bothered even doing that, and hung up and actually called 911. Riiiight - because they're going to run around for a fat, stupid, lazy chick who lies about her age - instead of catching burglars, murderers, or harassing Black people.

Monica again pertained that she wasn't sitting on her ass, but was "A musician, and artist y'know?" in order to waste police time - or not, as she was too lazy to answer the front door, she asked that the police didn't turn up. Probably because if they had, they would have notified social security who would have taken away all of her government moniez.

A series of these rants then followed on her youtube account, mainly hobo-esque rants, but the above selection included the following gem:

	“	If you say shit about me...urgh...you are gonna owe me a bank	„
	—Monica Punk, on methadone, again paid for by you

If Monica didn't weigh as much as the SS 'Oasis of the Seas', and hadn't been smashed over the head with an ugly tree-trunk at birth, then maybe she might have had something on Jessi Slaughter?