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Ibiza
Ibiza (pronounced 'Beefa') is an island in Spain, and as a result, is a favourite holiday destination for the chavs, sluts, and assorted criminals of Britain. The islands' indigenous population has been all but wiped out by the invaders and are now only seen very rarely in secluded locations.
Ibiza imports OVER 9000 tons of drugs and at least 100 supertankers full of cheap booze each year, this is needed to keep the guidos that inhabit the island partying hard. Ibiza's only exports are apocalyptically drunk chavs and an endless stream of shitty techno and dubstep remixes all of which sound the same, no matter which "band" releases the original song. The girls on Ibiza are famously easy and are usually so desperate for cock that they'll fuck anyone. That's right, these chicks are such massive whores they'd even bounce on your minuscule penis, hence why, each summer thousands of ugly, desperate men flock to the island for a chance of scoring some low quality pussy. Be warned though, chances are you'll end up with an STI of some variety, and be prepared for some sloppy seconds if you met the bitch you're about to bone in a nightclub. Chances are she's already had at least two other guys before you.
The Ibizan National Anthem
Dat early '90s CGI plane.
Ibiza is part of a series on Visit the Music Portal for complete coverage. |