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EDiot

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by imported>Sickpuppy at 01:54, 15 April 2014. It may differ significantly from the current revision.
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Your arms are weak and limp, hair unwashed and a thin layer of sweat covers your forehead. Sitting in the darkness wearing a stained vest, you drain the last dregs from a dr pepper sitting atop the mounting pile of cans and packets that has amassed beside you. A quick glance to your watch notifies you that it is 3:14am, and suddenly the slow sickly realization creeps in, that you just spent your entire day editing an unfunny article on a website that doesn't care about you. Staring at the space of wall above your computer with tired bloodshot eyes you realize.

You are a complete. Fucking. EDiot.
 


 
 

— symptoms of the EDiot.

The term EDiot was coined on #ed by the late, great OldDirtyBtard in 2006 and is considered to be the Encyclopedia Dramatica equivalent of a /b/tard. EDiots are the users of Encyclopedia Dramatica, editing and reverting their way to a shallow grave, stressing and sweating over the finer details of shit nobody cares about.

lol fagit

An EDiot is a strange unevolved being, that slumps in its office chair eyes glued to the screen constantly refreshing its watchlist page, avidly waiting for something to flame over. They can also be caught spamming ED articles with their own unfunny image macros and embedding long uninteresting jewtube videos everywhere like it was nobody's business, often leaving a long trail of unnecessary piping and grammatical errors snaking behind them.

Some EDiots, however, may be on their way to becoming a sophisticated dramacrat, and believe it or not, many sysops began as a slimy EDiot, working their way up and sucking all the dicks to stand king, on a great, shining mountain of shit. Never trust an EDiot, though, as there is a high probability that they are a faggot. In fact some ED users are outed furries, even having deviantART, YTMND or Uncyclopedia profiles on the side.

There are many types and kinds of EDiots, most of them hideously retarded. Although once in a while you will find an EDiot that is truly willing to do it for teh lulz, and if you ever do meet this special kind of breed, give him a slap and tell him to go outside.

The Attacker

 

This particular EDiot is often responsible for articles that have no lulz or categorizing of internet events. They enter ED under the belief that it is an internet hate machine, solely created by bitter and resentful people so as to complain about stuff they don't like. This type of EDiot is what most people on the internetz and IRL view Encyclopedia Dramatica to be infested with, causing a lot of ill-advised hate towards our beautiful site. So it is best to report this type of cancer riddled user directly to the authorities.

The Alcoholic

  This person is a fierce alcoholic

You can help by sending them pamphlets and donating your liver.

This kind of EDiot gets even more EDiotic when they've had a few sips of purple drank. Often drunkenly logging onto ED and accidentally blanking a few pages before falling asleep on the keyboard, on occasion they will only be a lil' bit tipsy and actually manage to create edits that are overflowing with shitty piping and W@ckey WRIT'inG .

Do not mistake this EDiot for having some semblance of a social life because they git crazy with the pimms, they just drink alone and spend hours fapping to wincest, they then proceed to cover themselves in vaseline, adopt the fetal position, and cry pathetically in a corner. GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY.

Alcoholic EDiots are recognizable by their one-line wiki edits and heavy IRC use.

The Underaged

 
Underage B&
This user is under 18.
Meaning they will likely plaster strikethroughs, memes, niggers, faggots, and other overused unfunny bullshit around Encyclopedia Dramatica. You can help by cleaning up after them.


 
Typical underage EDiot

This is an EDiot that still plays with Yu-Gay-Oh cards and has no hairs on his testicles. Note a large number of grammatical errors in this user's EDits, note also their inability to read anything longer than a sentence, so it is difficult for them to learn. A quick clean and fun way to teach them about the fundamentals of Encyclopedia Dramatica is to spam their userpage with a hot piping plate of pain series. The users underage mind will not be able to fathom these kinds of images, which will result in uncontrollable bouts of I'm 12 years old and what is this? before a complete Cerebral Aneurysm.

The underage EDiot does not even comprehend the word satire, so should be kept well away from this site, and b, and all computers actually, mainly because it is their bed time.

The Highschooler

  ED is Not Your High School.

This crybaby was banned for shitting up ED with petty clique drama.
You can help by photoshopping dicks onto their face and plastering it all over campus.

Directly related to The underage, this EDiot is striving to pass his exams so it is understandable that they cannot grasp the concept of ED, often spending hours creating long unfunny edits about people that are making them sad, baw. Much like The attacker but afraid to use naughty swearwords.

This EDiot comes home after a hard day of skool, switches on some super wicked dubstep and adds another angled, sepia profile picture to his facebook account. The highschooler then edits his article about a cheerleader he hates complete with dox, and proceeds to masturbate to a picture of said cheerleader whilst weeping silently, only to have his mother walk in on him. Throwing a pencil case at the closing door, The highschooler screams LEAVE ME ALONE!!1111!!

The Uncyclopedian

  Warning!
This user has been identified as an Uncyclopedic cunt and has been spamming ED with Shit Posts and replacing lulzworthy content with unfunny nonsense, gibberish and anti-lulz. If you spot him/her doing any of those actions, revert every single edit that he/she makes and vandalize the fuck out of his/her userpage.

Another descendant of The underage, this user believes that non-factual LOL SO RANDUM!!1 edits are in any way acceptable or funny, which is why there is a special place in hell reserved for these EDiots, where many demons wearing the face of Oscar Wilde will butt-rape them for all eternity.

Signs of an uncyclopedian include referring to Chuck Norris jokes, an overuse of quotes, and failing to become an hero.

The Gaiafag

 
EDiot is a GaiaFag!
You can help by Telling them to GB2/GAIA.
BE WARNED! They might be pretending to be a /b/tard, making them part of the cancer that is killing /b/.
Their faggotry is relentless.

Weeaboo, camwhore, fat fucks that have nothing better to do other than constantly edit the Anime portal, reverting anything vaguely negative whilst slowly pushing a lubed up figurine of sailor moon into their anus.

Don't worry though, its easy to seek out these particular EDiots for a swift raep-n-ban, due to their meticulously fashioned userpages, decorated with a swarm of gigantic animu eyes, adorable typed emoticons, and talk pages covered in various arse licking and dick sucking from all their other gaiafag friends. These EDiots are also relatively easy to troll into depression, just constantly insinuate that they are fat diseased middle aged men, which they are.

The Furry

 
WARNING
This user is a filthy fucking furfag.


You can help by hunting them down, deriding their psychological maladjustment to life, turning them into roadkill, and performing taxidermy on them.
Watch the CSI episode where it all happens.


These EDiots are possibly the most low-down, vile, putrid, degenerate sick-fucks to ever walk the halls of Encyclopedia Dramatica. Sitting at the computer sweating in a Ninetales suit, these overweight greasy ballbags peruse WikiFur and have no shame. A sad fate awaits these EDitors, as they will undoubtedly Yiff in Hell, if you ever encounter one of these deformed EDiots you should immediately spam the shi-LOOK THERE'S ONE THERE!!!! THERE'S ANOTHER! OH GAWD THEY'RE EVERYWERE!!!! KILL THEM WITH FIRE!!!!!

The Foreigner

Warning!   This contributor has no command of the written Engrish language.

You can help by using really short words and/or pictures.

Despite our best efforts, the internetz are available to non-english speaking countries across the world. So unfortunately there are many spics, negros, nazis, frogs, japs, chinks, wetbacks, greasy spaggettis, serial-killers, pakis, terrorists and klingons that infest our beloved wiki, running around typing edits in some other bullshit language, with no grasp of grammar or diction, and that's just awful.

Any EDiots from the southern states or Scotland can't construct a simple sentence either.

The Wikipedian

Jew
You look like you came from Wikipedia, so it would be nice if you started acting like a Dramatician. I gave you a barnstar as encouragement.

This particular EDiot is again another type that does not understand that ED is a satirical, lulzy wiki. Going through articles and writing blocks and blocks of, albeit grammatically sound, boring, factual tripe. Common symptoms are uninteresting, bland and jew, but you can jazz up this certain pseudo-intellectual EDiot's userpage with some super cool sparkle fun.

WARNING: this type of user will plaster their ragged front-face over all of their articles desperately begging you for monies.

The /b/tard

 
  DESU DESU DESU!  
EDiot is a /b/tard!

You can help by cleaning up after them.
BE WARNED! They are relentless.

 
 
A /b/tard EDiot attempting an article.

Another type of EDiot that is very closely related to The underage. Be prepared for a continuous stream of forced memes and rows and rows of light blue text piping to the aforementioned shit memes. b is, and never was, good, so these EDitor's edits should be swiftly and directly reverted, as we do not want The cancer that is killing /b/ to spread.

Luckily these EDiots consider any Encyclopedia Dramatica user to be a god, and will not attempt any of their shitty trolling if they perceive you to have any shred of authority. So if you encounter one, place the above template on their userpage, and state very clearly and authoritatively, GTFO..


EDiot Social-life

 
 


See Also

External Links


EDiot is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
Click topics to expand
 
EDiot is part of a series on Dying Alone

[DeadCry yourself to sleep]

  Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron AlexisAaron BushnellAaron SwartzAdam LanzaAlexis ArquetteAmanda ToddAmy WinehouseAnal CuntAndy KaufmanAngry GrandpaAnna Nicole SmithAnthony WarnerAsa CoonBrian AdamsBrandon CrispByuuCharmaine DragunCho Seung-HuiChris BenoitChris Harper-MercerChynaCodey PorterDavid BowieDavid CarradineDragoneerEazy-EEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyGeorge SodiniGizgizGleb KorablevHappyCabbieHarambeH.P. LovecraftHeath LedgerJake DavisonJeff WeiseJewWarioJim MorrisonKate SpadeKitty0706Kurt CobainLemonade CoyoteLeelah AlcornLil PeepLiloLoki BlackfangLowtaxMia JaninMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceNathan GaleNikita LytkinOtoya YamaguchiPekka-Eric AuvinenPrinceRandy StairRehtaeh ParsonsRicardo LopezRina PalenkovaRipperRobin WilliamsRonnie McNuttRudolph ZurickRyan PalmeterShawn WoolleyShayShuaibySol PaisStephen PaddockSteve StephensThomas Matthew CrooksTony48219TooDamnFilthyTyler DumstorfVester FlanaganWilliam AtchisonXXXTentacionZhao Zewei

Those Dying Alone

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Their Methods

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Featured article August 17 & August 18, 2011
Preceded by
Ron Paul
EDiot Succeeded by
DrMusic2