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Monica Punk

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Monica Punk is a fat, lesbian autistic with no job who lives at her mom's house, plays 20 instruments despite obviously having learned to play zaro, uploads 50 videos on YouTube a day and thinks she is in a gang despite the fact she calls the police crying when people troll her on the internet.

You can take this job and stick it

Monica is a whale that is both as wide as she is boring, who posted a video in which she repeatedly says "...I just...don't want a job" and complains about how she was dropped from Hot Topic because she was too lazy to work there. She also thinks that she's somehow better than everybody else because she's lazy. Some flaming ensued, followed by a whine-one-one call in a following video.

Since leaving her job, she has decided to become a waste of space paid for by tax slaves to sit on her fat ass, explaining (badly) about how she got there in the first place, and why she can't be bothered working at all.

Of course, Monica never really understood in the first place that if you are on social security and you reveal to the entire world via Social Media that you are too lazy to even fucking think, somebody at social security will eventually take your moniez away due to the fact aren't aren't fucking trying at all.

Monica claims to be about "Fun and games" despite the fact that she's the most boring individual you will ever come across, and therefore the last person you would want to interact with.


   
 
I'm actually too lazy to die
 

 
 

—Monica Punk

   
 
When are you going to shut up and cook the dinner?
 

 
 

—What Monica's careers guidance councilor should be asking her.


The following video has been rated 'R' for 'Retarded' by ED film censors.


Stop bullying me! Baaawwwww!

In full emo form, Monica produced a second video, because enraged social media warriors who had started flame wars on the youtube comments section, had told her to not be lazy and get a job.

What was amusing was Monica's half-assed attempt at producing a video asking people to not bully her because of her last video. For this video, which was such a lazy production, she didn't even move her lips, because she was expecting to get the court's answerphone system to do all the talking which also conveniently taking on her e-writ - taking all the work out of her complaint.

If Monica could only be outgoing enough to make a half decent lie, then perhaps she might be taken seriously - but she won't, so she is now left not only a fat cow, but a lolcow.

Unfortunately - like everything about Monica, she couldn't be bothered even doing that, and hung up and actually called 911. Riiiight - because they're going to run around for a fat, stupid, lazy chick who lies about her age - instead of catching burglars, murderers, or harassing Black people.


Monica again pertained that she wasn't sitting on her ass, but was "A musician, and artist y'know?" in order to waste police time - or not, as she was too lazy to answer the front door, she asked that the police didn't turn up. Probably because if they had, they would have notified social security who would have taken away all of her government moniez.

A series of these rants then followed on her youtube account, mainly hobo-esque rants, but the above selection included the following gem:

   
 
If you say shit about me...urgh...you are gonna owe me a bank
 

 
 

—Monica Punk, on methadone, again paid for by you



If Monica didn't weigh as much as the SS 'Oasis of the Seas', and hadn't been smashed over the head with an ugly tree-trunk at birth, then maybe she might have had something on Jessi Slaughter?


External links


Monica Punk is part of a series on YouTube.

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Monica Punk
is part of a series on
YouTube Ranters

[Get terminatedStart ranting]

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Monica Punk is part of a series on Dying Alone

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