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{{spoiler|CloudFlare Enables Miscreants}}
{{spoiler|CloudFlare Enables Miscreants}}
[[Image:Cloudflareerror.png|thumb|What your website [[fail|looks like]] with our [[Shit|Cutting edge]] technology]]
[[File:Cloudflareerror.png|thumb|What your website [[fail|looks like]] with our [[Shit|Cutting edge]] technology]]
[[File:Cloudflare what your site looks when it is up.png|thumb|But to get that last page you first have to get past this. Getting this correct gives you 15 seconds of browsing before you get another one. Half the websites on the net use Cloudflare too so enjoy!]]
[[File:Cloudflare facebook.png|thumb|What every person in the Philippines goes through.]]
'''CloudFlare''' is a [[7 Proxies|content delivery network]] that is responsible for 90% of [[Encyclopædia Dramatica|ED]]'s and [[EDF]]'s downtime, the other 10% being [[Mike Sandy]].
'''CloudFlare''' is a [[7 Proxies|content delivery network]] that is responsible for 90% of [[Encyclopædia Dramatica|ED]]'s and [[EDF]]'s downtime, the other 10% being [[Mike Sandy]].
It uses [[DNS|amazing new technology]] to spread the load between servers, its [[iptables|futuristic intrusion detection systems]] are only comparable to those of [[I_GOT_NORTON|Norton's users'.]]
[[File:CloudFlare-WTF-2.png|thumb|This is because Steve Jobs is dead.]]
It uses [[DNS|amazing new technology]] to spread the load between servers, its futuristic intrusion detection systems are only comparable to those of [[I_GOT_NORTON|Norton's users'.]]
The [[scam|paid version]] includes such [[Retarded|amazing]] features as [[LOL|sanitizing user input]] and a feature called "[[Lolwut|EASIEST SSL EVAR]]". The [[Jew gold| pro]] features also include [[Visual_Basic#VB_in_Hollywood|the advanced threat challenge page]] and [[wat|traffic statistics updated every 15 minutes as opposed to 24 hours]].
The [[scam|paid version]] includes such [[Retarded|amazing]] features as [[LOL|sanitizing user input]] and a feature called "[[Lolwut|EASIEST SSL EVAR]]". The [[Jew gold| pro]] features also include [[Visual_Basic#VB_in_Hollywood|the advanced threat challenge page]] and [[wat|traffic statistics updated every 15 minutes as opposed to 24 hours]].
[[Image:Cloudflarebackend.png|thumb|Behind the scenes at the Cloudcave]]
[[File:Cloudflarebackend.png|thumb|Behind the scenes at the Cloudcave]]
[[Image:Cloudflarefordummies.png|thumb|Clearly for [[Idiot|computer gurus]].]]
[[File:Cloudflarefordummies.png|thumb|Clearly for [[Idiot|computer gurus]].]]
==DDoS and h4x==
==DDoS and h4x==
Latest revision as of 21:21, 17 August 2015
This page contains spoilers — important plot secrets and/or conclusions may be revealed. For example, HOLY SHIT CloudFlare Enables Miscreants!!!1
It's interesting to have public enemy number one using our service but it is important to note that we are not the hosting provider; we're much more similar to something like a network provider where traffic is passing through us and we're not actually storing any of the data. Importantly, if we were to kick them off of our network that wouldn't take the content off the Internet it would just be a little bit slower.
„
—CloudFlare's spokesperson, telling him to chill out.
Being a reasonable personhe let the case go and moved on with his life, but not before sending yet another inquiry, this time asking whether they have ever enforced their own TOS, to which they responded:
“
We are not a web host and we don't censor content on the internet.
Even if we remove a site from CloudFlare it doesn't remove the content
from the internet in any way, shape, or form.When a complaint comes in we provide the direct IP to the site in question so that the person
with the complaint can take their complaint directly to the web host
of the site -- the only people who can ACTUALLY remove the site and
its content from the internet. We comply with every complaint that we receive.