Zerg Rush: Difference between revisions

Latest revision as of 05:30, 3 October 2016

Zerg Rush is a type of attack in Starcraft, a game by the company Blizzard. However it was perfected with the slanted eye power of AZNS, specifically, the Koreans who are known to die in obsession with the game (see seppuku and faggot). Pretty silly on its initial view, but it has extreme dramatic potential to piss off people and cause lulz..

Zerglings, the little creatures which are easy to create but easy to kill, are a staple of the newbie set, and are incredibly difficult to deal with - just like newbies.

Origins

The origins of a "Zerg Rush" come from the fact that at the start of a Starcraft game, a zerg player has an advantage to quickly build cheap offensive units faster than any other race. This allows the player to amass Zerglings (the aforementioned cheap offensive unit) and eliminate a player before they even get a chance to finish building a defense. As more retarded n00b gamerz started playing games, they bastardized the word into many different meanings. As such, the meaning of a zerg rush continues to evolve way outside of Starcraft. For example, because in a zerg rush, the player tends to be greatly outnumbered, many people believe a zerg rush to mean build lots of units and attack with them. However, if the tactic is planned for late game, it removes from original rushing part of a zerg rush, because by this point the enemy should have suitable defense. Sadly, this definition of zerg rush seems to be the majority so it is accepted as a proper use of zerg rush.

An extension of the zerg rush is to apply it to other unit types in the game, such as "DT (Dark Templar) Rush" (Dark Templars being permanently cloaked and very powerful) or even in the context of other games, "Grunt Rush", "Minigunner Rush", "Tank Rush", etc. In the true spirit of the original definition of a rush, this would mean to rush to the technological level of that particular unit and use the advantage of that unit to "out tech" the other player.

The use of the term "KEEKEKEEEKEEE!!!1" often accompanies zerg rushes as outlined above (but zerg rushes actually need to have a "Rush" component to it. Don't listen to him about the outnumbered shit, total bullshit), due to the charming and memorable noise the Zerglings make when striking an opponent.

Notable Zerg Rushes

Resident Evil Online Server 2 the player and server owner VVendettas constantly makes maps and uses maps, to piss off new and old fags. The concept is simple:

Create map.

Newfags' join.

Over 9000 zombies pwn.

Lulz are to be had.

From the mouth of the Epic Troll himself:

"It's simple, all I do is open the map selecter, select a blank slate. a wide open space, or somewhere boxed in. set the zombie number to 9999 and press start. Instant lulz." - VVendettas to the raging Faggots who were bitching about how he makes his maps. he did it for the lulz, and saw that it was good.

Note: Resident Evil Online is a piece of shit from BYOND.

The tsunami, earthquake and radiation in Japan ahh...this was good.

Last Thursday Japan was hit by a huge earthquake of over 9000 magnitude. This, of course, is not surprising because Japan is about as prone to natural disasters (magnified by their own stupidity) as Africa is to AIDS. To further the stupidity, they built nuclear reactors close to the shore line. Oh Japan, you so crazy.

What is surprising, however, is that one of the world's richest nations has completely failed to prepare for this inevitable pwning by GodJesus and as a result, civilised countries like North Korea and Iran must lend the Japanese tree fiddy, so that they can rebuild all the animu studios and child sex shops destroyed by the disaster. -Taken from Japan article

The hurricane in Haiti

Those cocks up your mothers' ass

Muslim immigration in Europe

Implementing a Real Zerg Rush

In Starcraft, create a game named "1v1 NO RUSH GOGO!"

Make a bunch of zerglings.

Take your army of zerglings and rush your opponent's camp before he/~~she~~ has time to put up a valid defense.

????

PROFIT

Using "Zerg Rush" in Other Games

Play any real-time strategy game such as Command & Conquer or Warcraft.
Build an ass load of low-level, cheap attack units, for example C&C red alert 2 (shurly ccrat?) This involves playing as a Soviet and building at least 100 (preferably Over 9000) Rhino tanks and then keeping them moving round in circles in enemies base with un-reasonable over use of waypoint mode,
A (crap) version of this is known as the "allied air rape" involving 9 hot-keyed Aircraft carriers, to demolish y00r base.
In Age of Empires 3 start as British, and make sure you have the Factory and Robber Baron cards, so you get 2 factories, and spam fuck with Musketeers and then Zerg Rush with your rockets and Gatling guns after you revolt. STRELETS OUT THE ASS WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS I DON'T EVEN
Company of Heroes start as American, them spam fuck riflemen, or play as British spam bren carriers then zerg rush with Churchills.(You motherfucking cunt)
Type/yell "ZERG RUSH!!111 KEEKEKEKEKE!!" once you get to their base and start your attack.
- (This step is ~~optional~~ mandatory and adds to the "authenticity" of a ZERG RUSH.)
????
PROFIT!!

Using "Zerg Rush" in Dramatic Situations

In a debate, if someone throws a pile of links or facts around, reply with "OMG ZERG RUSH!!!oneoneone"

A comment bomb-type situation (see: Ljpizza_party) could be considered an LJ Zerg Rush.

The quite famous "fifty Hitler post" or nowadays a "fifty Stalin", "fifty Terri Schiavo", "fifty Natalie Holloway", "fifty anorexic" or "2000 Goatses" is an option for zerg rushing a forum when you don't have enough zerg handy.