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"In lulz we trust."

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Article of the Now

The War of Northern Aggression

Also referred to as "The Great Unpleasantness", the War of Northern Aggression (aka: The Civil War, The 'Murrican Civil War, The Revolutionary War Volume 2) occurred at least 100 years ago between the North and South of the United States. A shitload of people died (over 9000), and they did so for one reason (contrary to common knowledge): E-points. It is a great source of drama for many people in the South who still can't believe they lost, and gets great lulz from historians who debate endlessly about the causes of the war and the minutiæ of the battles and battlefields of the war.

In the last 150 years after its end, the American Civil War has since gained a massive cult following, and probably has the largest and most dedicated fanbase besides the Third Reich and CoD. It's so popular that many fans are into a form of cosplay where they dress up like soldiers and "re-enact" the war. They're not quite as bad as furries, but it's still pretty disturbing. It's also worth mentioning that the average CW fanboys are usually bitter American rednecks from the south who are, more than likely, the descendants of Confederate soldiers and are still raging in butthurt envy over the embarrassing defeat of their beloved war heroes.

To many people (and for many reasons), the Civil War was unarguably the most entertaining and lulziest event ever to take place before the Titanic sinking, the Holocaust, Vietnam and 9/11. Because of the high loss of life, the causes of the war, the incompetency of its leaders and the aftermath of the war, it stood as the most epic lulzfest in history to happen until World War II. What makes it all especially hilarious is that the niggers, once freed from centuries of enslavement by Whitey, were duped into believing that they were about to enter in mainstream society and be treated equally (which didn't happen). Women too, tried participating in this war with the vain hope of gaining "rights," which also failed miserably ("The war's over, Miss Barton. Thanks for inventing the Red Cross. Your services are honored. Now get back in the fucking kitchen!"). Also let's not forget about 'ol Good Abe Lincoln's assassination at Ford's Theater; an event that served as the big grand finale of the war as it provided an unexpected plot twist that would shock and blow the minds of audiences worldwide for many years to come.

(( Those Inbred Hicks Weren't Able To Stand Up To The Might Of The North's Pure Blood ))


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