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Carlos Sousa Jr
.
Carlos "Run Run" Sousa Jr. was a fucktarded 17-year-old wannabe thuglife cholo from San Jose who taunted Tatiana the Tiger at the San Francisco Zoo on Christmas Day 2007 by throwing rocks and pine-cones at her and sticking his leg into the exhibit area. To his dismay, the tiger jumped across the moat, used the Mexican's leg as a makeshift rope, and climbed out. The kid got his punk ass promptly chewed, becoming an hero by tiger proxy.
23-year-old Kulbir Dhaliwal was actually the IRL Hate Machine's appetizer. As the tiger clawed and bit his Tandoori ass, Sousa and the younger brother, Amritpal "Paul" Dhaliwal, 19, yelled in hopes of scaring it off him, police said. The cat then went for the main course, slashing Sousa's neck and ripping off his face as the brothers ran to a zoo cafe to smoke moar trees and drink some forties.
After killing Sousa, the tiger followed a trail of marinated blood left by Kulbir about 300 yards to the cafe, where it mauled both men for dessert.
Shortly afterwords, the 5-0 arrived and found the cat sitting next to one of the bloodied brothers. The victim yelled, "Help me! Help me!" and the animal resumed its attack.
As the cops used their patrol car lights to distract the tiger, it turned and began approaching them, leading all four to shit bricks and go 187 on the motherfucker's ass.
A witness now claims that she saw the boys earlier with slingshots, and they were attempting to taunt a lion. Police also found an empty bottle of Jenkem in a car the boys used that day.
Be prepared for another sob-fest filled with speeches of how the teenager is a perfect little angel, and a lawsuit to collect some IRL jewgold. Meanwhile, online communities everywhere are mourning Tatiana over the dead li'l thuglife gobshite by about 99:1.
The Brothers. Such Good Boys
Recent shenanigans: October 9th 2007: Kulbir and Paul Dhaliwal (the two twats with Sousa) were charged with misdemeanor for being fucked up to the gills and resisting a police officer after they were arrested.
Kulbir Dhaliwal allegedly kicked the shit out of a security partition between the back and front seats in a police car after being handcuffed in the incident.
After these two get the band-aids off the munch bites out of their respective asses, they have to show up for these charges January 15th 2008.
—Steuart Scott, the deputy district attorney | ||
According to authorities, after the zoo attack the two surviving "darlings" refused to give their own names, identify the victim or give authorities an account of what occurred. This lack of cooperation, coming so soon after their friend had just been turned into a human Pez dispenser by a flesh eating furry, in no way implies that they did anything wrong, although some have suspected that the issue was more an act of self-preservation - not due to the underage drinking, but to avoid being deported due to lack of green cards.
It is now reported that the two Indian brothers have hired one time Michael Jackson attorney Marc Geragos and plan to sue the San Francisco Zoo for injuries as the result of something that they caused themselves.
Faggtory dug up on the Dhaliwal brother, Lolsuit filed as predicted by ED!
On March 27th 2007, one of the brothers was caught stealing a set of Wii game controllers by stuffing them in his pants at the San Leandro California Target store. He was subsequently cavity searched, booked, and released on a bail of $1500. Incidentally, they won a lolsuit filed against the San Francisco Zoo that same day, as predicted by ED. Maybe they couldn't wait for the settlement to buy those Wii controllers. [1]
EPIC FAILURE CONVICTION
After fucking around for a couple of months, the IRL judge finally threw the book at the sand nigger Paul Dhaliwal, with five counts of felony. Most of the rights he will lose won't be missed by this gangsta wanna be, since homies are too poor / stupid to travel anyways, let alone figure out how voting works. The exception is that he will never have a chance at being more than a petty thug, as his gun privilege has been revoked. ED predicts a career of robbing 7/11 and KFC's using Airsofts and Super Soakers.
I'm Sorry Ms. Miller. I am FOR REALZ
January 3rd 2008: Jennifer Miller was with her husband and two children at the zoo and saw the Dhaliwal Brothers acting like Fucktards Christmas Day.
—Jennifer Miller, being too goddamn stupid to realize tigers aren't lions. |
Supa Secret Pact.
January 5th 2008 Super inside sources at The Chronicle have revealed that the brothers made a pact with each other in the Ambulance as they were bleeding all over the fucking place. This pact: DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING. Howevar, police have seized their cell phones and are currently looking for pix of the incident.
—Kulbir Dhaliwal to his brother, pwnt by a paramedic. | ||
911 Transcripts
The first radio entry was at 5:08 p.m.:
"A VERY AGGITATED [sic] MALE IS CLAIMING HE WAS BITTEN BY AN ANIMAL. … MALE IS BLEEDING FROM THE HEAD."
As the zoo was evacuated:
"ZOO PERSONNEL ARE GOING AROUND TO ADV PEOPLE TO LEAVE"
Rescue squads were initially hesitant to enter the grounds until Tatiana was located:
"MEDICS ARE OUTSIDE WILL NOT ENTER TILL SECURE,".
At one point, the zookeepers may have believed the danger to the victims had passed:
"ZOO PERSONNEL HAVE THE TIGER IN SIGHT AND ARE DEALING WITH IT. THE VICT IS ACROSS THE ZOO INSIDE A CAFÉ,".
But a few minutes later, Tatiana tracked the brothers to the snack bar while officers radioed:
"SCENE IS NOT SAFE" and "SCENE IS NOT SECURE"
At 5:27 p.m., police witnessed Tatiana attacking Paul Dhaliwal:
"CODE 33. HAVE TIGER ON FOOT ATTACKING VICTIM"
(As opposed to "tiger in vehicle attacking victim") But one minute later, they transmitted the message:
"SHOT THE TIGER AT THE CAFÉ VICT BEING ATTENDED TO."
Tatiana was dead. Radio reports that up to four additional tigers were roaming zoo grounds proved false.
Zoo emergency dispatch initially reported that there were two males acting 800 (police code for mentally disturbed) and making shit up. An empty bottle of vodka found in the car of the fresh meat may or may not explain some of this.
Christmas is for Tigers
The classy Dhaliwal brothers told Sousa Sr. that his son wasn't with them. IRL, these smart aspiring hip hop artists were at the San Francisco Zoo about to become Mexican dinner with a side of Indian food, for a 350-pound Siberian tiger.
—Sousa Sr. Not hearing his son laughing his ass off; and Dhaliwhali being racist, because he should know better. Everyone knows that Mexicans don't celebrate Christmas, they celebrate Borderjumpica. | ||
December 30th 2007: Harold and Kumar Paul and Kulbir have been going around the media proclaiming they have called Sousa Sr. to apologize for his kid being pwnt. Apparently It was some other Sousa Sr. they were calling as the father says he has not heard shit:
—Sousa Sr. BAAAAAWWWWWWWWWING and helpless against two kids. | ||
OH LAWD...A Bloody Shoe!
Rumors have it that a bloody shoe was found in the grotto of the Tiger's place. Speculation has arisen that one of these angelic children jumped ass over the fence and was teasing this tiger with one of his legs. Since the tiger had mauled the shit out of a zookeeper's arm the year before, this may have been what experts call a "bad fucking idea." Other theories involve O.J. Simpson, no stranger to bloody accessories.
fukk you tatiana
—Kayana. Not getting that Tatiana is a tiger, and not some ho in SJ, and is also dead | ||
—Kayana, heading to the San Francisco Zoo | ||
A History of Violence
According to a December 30th Article from the SF Chronicle, the zoo has also had past incidents involving safety and security lapses. These incidents included a koala kidnapping, an intruder breaking in and having sex with a sheep, an elephant doing a headstand on a trainer, breaking her pelvis, and Tatiana the Tiger mauling the fuck out of the arm of a zoo keeper attempting to feed her a year earlier.
But what about the poor KITTY??
Sure, it's always sad when an animal has to die because some dumbfuck decides it's time to send in that Darwin Awards entry, but most people understand that shit happens. Furries and furries-in-denial wept bitter tears over the incident, however, lamenting the cops' decision to shoot Tatiana instead of appeasing her with offerings of bellyrubs and catnip, as is standard procedure when dealing with gigantic man-eating animals.
- By no means would I try to downplay the death of a person, but how much sense does it make to destroy an animal that's endangered rather than say, release her to the wild or something :(
- Why kill it (and endangered species)? Shoot it full of tranquilizers and send it into the wild. If it can't survive, then at least you gave it a chance. Forget the fact in on many cases the tranquilizers actually kill the animal.
- It obviously has the instinct to kill things and eat the flesh of things.
Never mind that the tiger was born and raised in captivity, or that killing a human being is about the same as being able to tie your shoes on the wilderness-survival scale. She could totally have survived in the wild! Those meanie cops should've waited for her to kill five or six more people so the zookeeper could get there with his dart gun. That way, she could be released in Bumfuck, Siberia in order to starve to death or get shot by some villager who doesn't give a shit about animal rights when there's a fucking man-eating tiger on the loose, but at least she would've had a chance.
As of June 4, 2008 the San Francisco Medical Examiner determined that Mr. Sousa was HIGH AND DRUNK, yet his family is still going to sue an already understaffed, underfunded organization for what, to prove a point or to bleed a turnip????!!! If they sue and are victorious, say goodbye to the zoo and then goodbye to all the animals that are in the zoo because they will surely be euthanized. Way to prove a point, kill more animals because of an ignorant, idiotic act.
If those assholes didn't ever taunt that tiger in the first place, none of this would have ever happened. That tiger was housed in that cage for two years and never once tried to escape. Smart Carlos, smart. Karma is such a bitch, too bad it came at the cost of the tiger's life, you were just a waste of life waiting to die, whether it be by the hand of a man pulling a trigger or by the paw and jaw of a tiger. Please, for god's sake, just let the lesson be learned - DON'T FUCK WITH WILDLIFE!!!!!
Indian parenting is the reason Carlos Sousa Jr. and Tatiana are dead!
Even Craigslist has something to say about the incident.
—Anonymous Craigslist Racist | ||
—Craigslist Racist #2 Agrees | ||
—Craigslist Racist #3 Jumps on the band wagon | ||
In Defense Of The Dahliwal Brothers
Actually, these two kids have no defense other than temporary insanity, and that can only be accomplished if their attorney Jew can find a judge retarded, gullible, and/or bribable enough to accept the "Little Black Sambo" defense - they were attempting to perform an ancient Afro-Hindu manhood ritual involving young Hindu males tricking tigers to run around a tree in circles until they turn into butter, then stuff themselves with pancakes until they're fat, dumb and happy little pickaninnies. While this defense would probably work quite well in the Deep South, it doesn't stand a snowball's chance in Hell as the case's current jurisdiction is in San Francisco California.
Possible Græt Justice
Police have already reported that the Dhaliwal brothers have been hostile to them in the death investigation. After the attack the brothers refused to give their own names, identify the victim or initially give authorities an account of what occurred.
Whilst currently on the offensive with a fancy 'celebrity' Jew, they'll prolly be needing a public defender when all the facts come out and witnesses come forward. In the end Marc Geragos will drop their case quicker than Britney Spears' lawyers.
Some Possible Charges:
- Contributing to the delinquency of a minor.
- Involuntary manslaughter.
- Negligent homicide.
- Wrongful death.
- Molesting wildlife.
- Violation of probation.
- Culpable negligence.
- Animal abuse to an extinct animal.
- Trespassing.
- Malicious and criminal mischief.
- Reckless endangerment.
- Conspiracy.
- Possession of a deadly weapon.
- Public endangerment.
- Disorderly conduct.
- Perjury (prediction for 2008).
- Contempt of court (prediction for 2008).
- Tampering with evidence (prediction for 2008).
Jewtube Responds
Wow. What a friend. Hopefully, he was mauled by his barking dog immediately afterwards.
Same batshit insane woman BAWWWing about how terrible and insecure the zoo is (see above pic for why she is fucktarded).
Zoo Attack Examination. Show Mauling or GTFO!
Air America's Young Turks. Don't Fuck with a Tiger
Delicious Copy Pasta
—Maggie. Hitting Math. Skipping English. | ||
Gallery
-
Run. There are tigers. -
Next stop was going to be the Hyena petting area, but they didn't get that far. -
Chew Toy -
Scene of the incident -
Cats everywhere were intrigued
-
Goes down better than wetback. -
DO NOT WANT
-
How to Make a Human Pez Dispenser -
But they didn't expect idiots, did they? -
-
The scene of the tragedy -
A higher view -
The aftermath
See Also
External Links
- His MySpace (last login 12/25 lol).
- Kulbir Dhaliwal's MySpace.
His Youtube"This account is suspended."MySpace Memorial Page for the dead chump (Complete with shitty music)- Some shitty memorial pix
- Carlos Sousa Jr. Guest Book. Spam the ever loving fuck out of this.
- My Son is not at the zoo
- Wired Article on MySpace Memorial Pages
- Dhaliwal caught stealing shits from local Target store
- Wii would like to play in your pants.
- Dhaliwal failed at life
| Featured article January 2, 2008 | ||
| Preceded by Penis Nosed Fox |
Carlos Sousa Jr | Succeeded by Guess The Meme |