Mix Hyena

Mix Hyena is highly devoted to the Final Solution.

This person has Assburgers Syndrome, so you can't say anything bad! :-( Be aware of that, you insensitive fuck.

Mix Hyena is a whiny furry douchebag who defies stereotypes by being grotesquely thin instead of grotesquely fat. Mix exists in such a constant state of butthurt that even other furries can’t stand him, but it's not his fault because he has Assburgers and thus free license to be a tard. Because of his handicap, Mix gets to live rent-free with his furfag friends and they're not allowed to complain because that would be fursecution.

Mix trolls a convention

Mix lives here.

Mix tried to troll famous furry convention Fuckyifforgy 5000 IRL by wearing a "Something Awful" shirt and yelling "SOMETHINGAWFUL DOT COM." He wants to be a Something Awful goon because he thinks that it's still 2002 and that Something Awful is still funny, but he can't because he is a furry and, as such, a failure in everything he attempts.

Amazingly, the furries did not explode in drama at his appearance, but instead pretty much ignored him. Internet master debater Xydexx had this to say: "To be honest, I didn't think he was doing anything really malicious. I mean, he gave me an I <3 VCL button. That was kinda nice. The worst he did at AC was exercise poor judgment, that's all. Everyone makes mistakes." Thus, Mix has the distinction of being the only person ever to fail in an attempt to troll furries.

Irrefutable Evidence of Mix's Faggotry

• He wrote his own WikiFur page, as evidenced by the fact that it's full of irrelevant bullshit about Mix’s thoughts on religion and other shit nobody cares about.
• He locked his own WikiFur page. Fag.

[18:51] <Jewbacca> not even kidding.
[18:52] <Mix> Not into that.
[18:52] <Mix> My friends are Jewish, and I don't wish to be a racist.
[18:52] <Mix> My Grandpop got murdered in a camp.
[18:54] <Mix> Are you a racist?
[18:55] <Jewbacca> totally.
[18:55] <Mix> Sorry to hear that.
[19:03] <Jewbacca> respond

LOLDONGS

Mix Hates This Article

Mix, in the midst of a pretty rough purging session.

[21:06] <Mix> Well, everything is a lie in that article. And badly worded at that.
[21:06] <weev> ...
[21:06] <weev> WHAT ARTICLE
[21:06] <Mix> http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Mix_Hyena
[21:06] <weev> OKAY
[21:06] <weev> NOW WE ARE GETTING SOMEWHERE
[21:06] <Mix> sorry
[21:06] <weev> okay
[21:07] <weev> so what would you like us to do about it?
[21:07] <Mix> Have the page locked, and/or purged.

If there is one thing this guy knows about, it's purging. Lawl.

Mix's Hatred for Christians and His Beliefs in Polar Energy

Powered by polar energy

"Mix has stated that he has issues with organized religion, most notably Christianity. His hatred towards all religion has had him to believe in a philosophy of spirits and polar energy, though still open-minded towards all other philosophical debates. He then relates his own philosophy to transformations and physical shifting, though he has his doubts."

OLOLOL

Mix's Scritchbook

Mix is also known for his "sketchbook" retardation. The sketchbook is the true window to a furry’s soul, a magical tome that a furry carries with him everywhere so that he can cajole artists into drawing free pictures of his true hermaphrodite-fox-wolf-dragon-taur murrrrrsona in it.

Mix claims to have "a knack for his sketchbook, stating that no one may draw in it if they intend to 'sign' their work." First, the idiot has misused the word "knack," but what do you expect from a furry? Mix’s plan to deny artists credit for their work under the guise of preserving the purity of the art does not sit well with most artists, especially since the real purpose behind the NO SIGNATURE rule is much more sinister: ART THEFT DUN DUN DUN DUUUUN. Also, if an artist signs anything in Mix's book, he will cry the tears of a clown and threaten IRL suicide.

Mix says, "Artwork is supposed to capture a person's soul/spirit, not their signature. The signatures make the work abstract in appearance."

LOL FAG

Current Shit

Greasy as ever, creepin' in the back.

Currently, Mix is living in San Antonio, Texas. He has infiltrated the 'werewolf' subculture, and is busy schmoozing with Wolfie Blackheart (also see: Shadow) and her 'pack'. Of course, I doubt they know about his psychotic history and as soon as he starts being a creeper they'll kick him out. Or maybe they'll welcome him, based on their past fucked-up actions of beheading innocent puppies.

	“	Sorry I've been away. I've tracked down the werewolf packs of San Antonio which I've posted about months ago. I've moved closer to them, and am finally parting my life away from the furry subculture. Is there a difference? Much. Too much to explain two different worlds, but I've seen that furries here REALLY hate the werewolves; while most werewolves don't even know or care what a furry is.	„

External Links

• mix-hyenataur
• Mythbusters porn exists, Mix cries.
• Facebook

Mix Hyena is part of a series on Aspies.

[Back to your happy placeSperg out]

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Mix Hyena is part of a series on Furfaggotry Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.