MMA

File:Mma fan.gif

Brock Lesnar

Mixed Martial Arts aka MMA is a sport in which competitors try to force submission or knock out their opponent. It was originally invented so big bar brawlers could beat the shit out of karate kid nerds who think 45 minutes a week of calisthenics from their fat, ponytail-wearing sensei in a mall will give them uber ninja skillz. Fortunately rules have been added to increase the amount of hugging and testicles to the face, since the only people who watch are closet footfags. The typical MMA fighter wanted to be a professional football player but wasn't good enough so used his high school wrestling background and a bunch of steroids to become a "fighter."

UFC

Ugly Fags Cuddling, or UFC, is the biggest and best MMA organization in the world. The UFC has adopted rules which maximize the man-love and has the best dry-humpers in the world, like Jon Fitch and Gray Maynard. Fighters in the UFC are so shitty that a former pro wrestler who couldn't make it in the NFL became their heavyweight champion in only four fights. John McCain trolled them by banning them from 36 states and getting their TV deal yanked.

Pride FC

Pride was an organization that tried to find the best fighter in the world, and (obviously) to promote gay pride in Japan. Once it was a beacon of awesome for allowing head stomping on the ground, a 10 minute championship round, and a look the other way regarding drug use. It was bought by the UFC and disbanded because their rules discouraged hugging and teabagging by allowing knees to the head and face-stomps.

Gallery of No Homo

Hey, I kinda like that.

DO NOT WANT

Why does he keep talking about panties?

It ain't gay if the balls don't... oh, too late.

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  The athleticism required to be a fighter is low. Even double rainbow guy can do it
• Shoes are optional in the UFC, clothes are not
  Shoes are optional in the UFC, clothes are not
• In Pride removing the underpants was a way to win
  In Pride removing the underpants was a way to win

TL;DR?

See Also

• Cheeseburger Josh
• Professional Wrestling
• Jock

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