Burn a Koran Day
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Burn a Koran Day was the brainchild of a rabid Floridian Christfag and Troll pastor called Doctor Terry Jones set to coincide with the anniversary of 9/11 (which also happens to be the official end of Ramadan and Eid el Fitr aka Moslem Christmas Day). To further facilitate teh lulz, Mr Jones contracted with a local armed militia called the “Right Wing Extreme” to provide security -protecting the book-burners, keep things orderly and provide further lulz, drama and Liberal butthurt.
The original event was scheduled to take place on the church grounds, but extreme media coverage has resulted in a national event. However on 9/9/2010 Jones announced that he would cancel his event because Imam Rauf Sharia was no longer going to extend his holy land to ground zero. However after Jones had made this announcement, Imam Rauf Sharia called the Reverend's bluff and said he had made no decision. The two are scheduled to battle on 9/11 in New York to dispute the situation. And thus, the good Doctor will have attained his lifelong goal -and the real point of this whole affair- to get the fuck out of his hick town and go hang out with the Jews in Jew York City.
According to the Failbook page for the event (which has over 14,000 members), on September 11th, 2010, from 6pm - 9pm, they were going to burn the Koran on the property of Dove World Outreach Center in Gainesville, FL in remembrance of the fallen victims of 9/11 and to stand against the evil of Islam. Islam is of the Devil!
It should be noted that if the 24/7 newscycle hadn't jumped all over this hot potato like flies on the shit it is and ignored that batshit insane old coot, this would have pretty much gone unnoticed.
'Doctor' Terry Jones
Terry Jones was born and raised in southeast Missouri and, incidentally, went to high school with Rush Limbaugh. Srsly. Originally a Jew, Dr. Jones embraced Christianity after finding how much fun you can have as a Christian during his 30 years in Europe as a missionary. Upon his return to Florida, Jones became a pastor for the Dove World Outreach Center, a church consisting of a whopping 50 families all of which are probably related. The church also contains a boarding school in which the students are not allowed to do anything other than worship Jesus or hate Islam.
Before his current mission for 15 Minutes of Fame, this Grade A attention whore once lorded over a church in Germany where he taxed the congregation like he was some kind of Xtian L. Ron Hubbard and was fond of telling his sheeple that old nugget of wisdom from Adolf Hitler that "arbecht macht frei" before getting banhammered for being too EXTREME!
Dr. Jones is also a batshit crazy Braveheart fanatic (proof that batshit crazies stick together), and has Braveheart memorabilia in every room of his church. The Youtube channel Jones started is also named "The Braveheart Show".
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In his best selling book Islam is of the Devil he writes:
- Why Islam is not a religion of peace but of violence (he learned it from a reliable source).
- How the political history of Islam can demonstrate what will happen in the future if it is allowed to flourish
- What you can do to take a stand for the truth and engage in the spiritual battle to reclaim nations from the grips of Islam
—Terry Jones | ||
Other Ways to Burn a Koran
- Using a CD burner.
- Use it in place of foil while BBQ-ing roast pigs.
- Use the pages to roll a spliff.
- Stuff it inside a Terry Jones effigy.
- Rip off a smelly muslim women's burka, shave her mustache for firewood and burn it in front of her.
Terry Jones Versus Irony
- Terry Jones is the Christian equivalent of Richard Dawkins.
- Everything in Islam is of the Devil is true.
- His protest has made people hate Christians more than Muslims.
Opposing Groups
The US Army
Recently, Final Boss of US forces in Afghanistan, General David Petraeus, spoke out against Burn a Koran Day, saying that this kind of bullshit could only serve to troll the Taliban causing severe butthurt that would have further endangered the already tenuous welfare of his cannon fodder on the ground.
—Petræus |
General Petræus, however, failed to notice that the Taliban generally get butthurt about anything and everything anyway.
In other news, Defense Undersecretary John Bottom made a personal call to Penelope Lane, 27, of Green Springs, Nevada, to protest that she had been seen placing the Koran on the second shelf in the school library. After some urgent protests, she agreed to keep the Koran on the top shelf, after the local Imam arranged to get her a higher stepstool and helped her cart away some older editions of the Linux Bible to make room.
The Pope, John McRage, Interpol, The US State Department, Hilldog and Black Jesus
As pressure mounted, Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton finally got involved and issued a statement skewering the pastor like a shish kebob hoping that it would take the pressure off the USA's secret Moslem President Obama to come to the rescue of his real Holy Book. However, Hilldog's comedic turn didn't sufficiently assuage the butthurt and Obama was forced to weigh in on the situation, calling it a "recruiting bonanza for Al Qaeda". This after condemnation from the Pope, John McCain, Secretary of Defence Bill Gates. Also, Interpol issued an international warning based on tips from Pakistani intelligence about possible repercussions and the US State Department issued an official warning for all Americans travelling overseas to pretend to be Canadian.
Bitching Bleeding-Heart Liberals
Another group of butthurt Americunts are the liberalfags complaining that burning a religious book about Islam is racist... even though Islam is a religion, not a race.
However it's important to note not everybody opposing Burn a Koran Day is a raghead or inflicted with liberal guilt - some just really, really hate Jews.
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MUSLIMS ARE NOT FASCISTS!
JEWS ARE NOT FASCISTS!
But seriously, fuck christfags ... -
Your hatred of Islam is a form of bigotry ... because of Jews ...
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This however is not racist. -
Don't they?
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Flying planes into a building is one thing, but burning a book? Now that's just evil.
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This man was sadly burnt during an Anti-Koran burning protest in which they burnt the American flag.This man was sadly burnt during an Anti-Koran burning protest in which they burnt the American flag.
Supporting Groups
Conservative Rednecks
Continuing the Christian tradition of burning books that aren't the Bible, inhabitants of America's wang would have been cooking s'mores over Muhammad to celebrate the religious freedom of the USA. Down with Arab "religion"! Up with religious freedom!
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Get a brian morans[sic]!
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Note all the red arrows.
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Note all the green arrows.
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Somewhat ironically Muslims are glad to finally have something to be genuinely offended about.
Internet Tough Guys
Amazon.com and Google are all in favour of the book-burning because they despise the printing press and have been working tirelessly to destroy ink and paper book in their relentless crusade to digitise fucking everything.
The Lulz End
As of September 9, 2010, in a classic case of troll's remorse, Jones has backed down. He has not stood his ground. Instead, he will be traveling to New York on Saturday to meet with the Mosque's organizers.
According to a BBC News Article, he has agreed to not burn the Koran because the Ground Zero Mosque is being moved. The Jew have stated, however, that they have no plan to move it. During a press conference (apparently he hasn't heard the Mosque isn't going to be moved after all), he stated "We would right now ask no one to burn Korans. We are absolutely strong on that. It is not the time to do it." See, the confusion arose because the local Imam who offered to act as a go-between (and went on TV to announce that the Ground Zero Mosque would move) was not actually authorised to do so and was trying to grab himself some TV face-time.
Meanwhile Donald Trump has jumped on the bandwagon by offering to buy the property where the Ground Zero Mosque is slated to be built. And Westboro Baptist Church has stated that they will continue to burn the Koran on the set date... while carrying "GOD HATES AMERICA" signs.
You know, it's pretty fuckin' pathetic when America has to rely on Fred Phelps to show the world that we're not all a bunch of pussies. Maybe the media will let Muslims worldwide know that we've allowed Phelps to run around for the past thirty years picketing the funerals of our own soldiers, picketing where the president's kids go to school, and generally making an ass out of himself. At which point they might get an inkling of the whole freedom of speech thing, and have to go celebrate by blowing up themselves and fellow Muslims, with great victory.
<video type="liveleak" id="6b5_1284240430" position="center" width="570" height="363" />
Disregard That; A master troll, a hero and absolute legend has saved the day
Pastor Jones has now said that the book-burning is now on hold rather than cancelled. The crazy old coot says he was lied to. He had spent days waiting for a sign from God to cancel the protest, and that the sign had come in the form of a deal with a local Imam to relocate a controversial Islamic cultural centre due to be built near Ground Zero in New York. However, since the local Imam had no juice in the matter, he's reneging on the deal.
—Jones |
In addition, the Party Van has paid several visits to Pastor Jones over the last few days.
Even though Pastor Terry Jones backed out of burning the Koran, someone claiming to be inspired him has burned one at Ground Zero.
This Koran burner was later identified and got fired from his New Jersey Transit job.
Two other reverends in Tennessee have also carried out what Terry Jones couldn't bring himself to do.
—Reverend Bob Old, expressing his love with a zippo | ||
Meanwhile, in Indonesia, members of the "religion of peace" are stabbing Christians in retaliation.
Gateshead, England shows The World How To Do It In Style
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Six men have been arrested for inciting racial hatred in Gateshead!!1 |
Geordie chavs show how it's done. They got v&.
Shockingly, these men were arrested, even though THEY BROKE NO LAW. Northumbria Police arrested them on the grounds of inciting racial hatred, not realising that Islam is NOT a race. No wonder that hero Raoul Moat hated them.
Northumbria police are very wrong about racism. Islam is not a race. It's just fucking ink on paper. By arresting them, they have drawn massive media attention.
Videos
Previous Video | Next Video
See Also
- Everybody Draw Mohammed Day Also a good idea
- Ground Zero Mosque The Muslims troll back
- Muhammad Sex Simulator 2015
- Muslim Massacre
- Koran Man
- Mel Gibson
- Fred Phelps
- Trolling IRL
- Troll's Remorse
- You
External Links
- Failbook page
- Pastor Jones' 'church'
- Terry Jones' site
- Terry Jones on TOW
- Jones' personal army, Right Wing Extreme forums. ITT: they discuss Burn A Koran Day.
- Youtube Account
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| Featured article September 10, 2010 | ||
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Burn a Koran Day | Succeeded by Conservapedia |