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Aush0k
THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ. BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM. |
aush0k is an Internet enthusiast from the hack happy kings of ezbake. He was the last of the EPIC SWAT'ers and carders (five expired ID's and his mom's credit card). When he's not busy blanking entire servers at work he enjoys quality time with EDIRC where he whines at zaiger to give him ops. Aush0k has spent much time claiming to ruin people's imagechan experience and being a complete failure on IRC. His hobbies include falsely claiming responsibility for the packet rape of 711chan, 4chan, 420chan and not420chan but in reality he doing absolutely nothing. By hiding behind his BFF's dshocker and Cromlech "CBOSS" they were able to forward these sites some vacation time, to the tune of a week, because what's better than being king of the faggot pile? He was left with only his blog pride & fuckbuddy C as his comrades fell victim to Operation Boss Roast. Afterward he tried to become the big boss of Lulzsec but was rejected. He told Aussie Police that he continued his merciful forwarding of sick time to overstrained websites such as the entire PSN network, various computer "security" agencies, and the CIA but he has the hacking skills of Crash Override. When not being a helpful netizen he spends his time being a lisp voiced cocksucking nerd. He enjoys expertly crafted cakes.
Aush0k's Early Days
This is intrepid shit chatter began his Internet career Reason for going to jail lol as many had being a pasty faced Counter Strike player. Spending his adolescence mindlessly grinding away at South Korean l33t gamers wasn't enough for him though so he decided to begin stealing poorly written code so he could brag about getting banned by 12 year old server admins. After mastering AIMbots he moved onto the chats of Bluehell IRC a skiddie cove popular with people who weren't in the Outback Steakhouse. He slowly honed his master class hacker skills here by watching poor abbo bootleg copies of Hackers and posting pictures of himself in poorly lit rooms. However, he was surely destined for greatness and when BlueHell fell he did what all Aussie children do when not watching the Crocodile hunter he started posting on 4chan. Unfortunately for him he was not greeted with pictures of pokemon and dogcocks but with derision. He reeled back in horror and ran back crying to #ezbake oven where he cried to his underground hacker lair to help him take down the Internet. The following transpired:
1. 420chan and the /i/nsurgents are targeted first and were quickly cooked in the ez bake oven.
2. 711chan was hit, in an attempt to incite action against C & Aush
3. CBoss & Aush visited the partyvan IRC servers, and CBoss took them offline. When they let it back on, they visited #insurgency where januszeal and all of the other Admins sucked both of their dongs,
Victory was claimed even though the real story was that people who run off the shelf weeb imagechans have the security experience of a fat girl obsessed with stuffing their face with pocky, JanusZeal is completely inept at doing anything but having his ass fucked, and chanfags can't seem to operate basic database software. Aushok & Cromlech thought that they could utilize the forces of Anonymous for their own needs, and said they would equip them with a small, outdated oven & a lifetime supply of KFC Vouchers. After the realization that assimilation, reformation or crowning any of the *chan trolls as associates or lackies was impossible due to their level of inferiority, the bosses Cromlech & Aushok left the chan sites and IRCD's alone
Bitches fuck shit up
Aush0k being the epic guy that he is decided to uploaded a video of himself back in 2009 claiming his "return to the internet". In the video he talks (in a very bad accent might I add) about OWNING a few first time 4chan users and plebs from the intarwebz!!!1 These nobodies include, Dshocker, Brittany Holecko, some other gay faggots who he circle jerked with and so on. Fun fact, in the video the guy actually wears his girlfriend's pink pajama pants this includes that he is indeed a kangaroo fucker.]]
—lol tell ur bitch to come here |
Here are some words of wisdom if you are going to be a l33t internet haxor and self proclaimed "legende".
Do not I repeat DO NOT allow your stupid bitch of a whore girlfriend to video tape you singing along karaoke style to some faggot gay ass shit song from a shitty movie/ If your bitch girlfriend does get you to do the following, please make sure the dumb whore doesn't upload the video onto the internet for all to see, this might ruin your e-creed and cause your self esteem to drop down a few BOSS notches. Secondly, do not allow her to post on any Internet forums let alone with your face plastered all over her posts. Lastly, after you have such girl as a romantic partner do not sob deeply when she leaves you and you head to IRC.
Aush0k's "Hard Chats"
Apr 15 15:37:01 * aush0k ([email protected]) has joined #ed Apr 15 15:37:05 <PieAreSquare> Yeah, I meant the people who don't want to do a SFW wiki Apr 15 15:37:06 <LYNX> we all die anyways Apr 15 15:37:10 <Finney> and yes, fucking anon is sooooo stupif Apr 15 15:37:11 <aush0k> hello faggots Apr 15 15:37:14 <Finney> the forums will be NSFW Apr 15 15:37:16 <PieAreSquare> Not everyone is going to want to contributo to ohi Apr 15 15:37:19 <aush0k> what has happened to ed ? Apr 15 15:37:21 <Finney> aush0k: hello boring troll Apr 15 15:37:27 <kasper> PieAreSquare, good Apr 15 15:37:28 <Finney> aush0k: ED evilved Apr 15 15:37:32 <Finney> evolved also Apr 15 15:37:37 <PieAreSquare> ashok: We're not doing it any more, fuck off Apr 15 15:37:55 <Finney> lol Apr 15 15:38:03 <LYNX> aushOk, what's wrong? Apr 15 15:38:05 <PieAreSquare> We're on holiday forever Apr 15 15:38:07 <aush0k> the death of encyclopediadramatica may be attributed to attracting the attention of irc.grove.bz #Grove Apr 15 15:38:20 <PieAreSquare> Never heard of them Apr 15 15:38:21 <Finney> aush0k, if you think that's true, be my guest Apr 15 15:38:21 <PieAreSquare> FUck off Apr 15 15:38:22 <LYNX> ok Apr 15 15:38:33 <ttj> WHY DID WE OFFEND IRC.GROVE.BZ Apr 15 15:38:35 <ttj> WHY Apr 15 15:38:36 <ttj> YOU ASSHOLES Apr 15 15:38:44 <PieAreSquare> I thought it had been well established that we'd been bought and now we're all rich Apr 15 15:38:48 <Finney> lolol Apr 15 15:38:49 <LYNX> aushOk, go start an article about that Apr 15 15:38:53 <Finney> Pie, true Apr 15 15:38:58 <Finney> lol Lynx Apr 15 15:38:59 <Finney> yes Apr 15 15:39:07 <Finney> that is the appropriate course of action: Apr 15 15:39:07 <deuZ> [00:40:15] <aush0k> the death of encyclopediadramatica may be attributed to attracting the attention of irc.grove.bz #Grove Apr 15 15:39:08 <PieAreSquare> I can has my jewgolds nao, Sherrod Apr 15 15:39:13 <deuZ> what the fuck is irc.grove.bz? Apr 15 15:39:19 <deuZ> is that some fucking faggot hivemind? Apr 15 15:39:22 <PieAreSquare> Never heard of it Apr 15 15:39:27 <deuZ> YOU Apr 15 15:39:28 <deuZ> PieAreSquare Apr 15 15:39:35 <deuZ> why did you molest me Apr 15 15:39:40 <aush0k> [17:41:10] <+deuZ> what the fuck is irc.grove.bz? Apr 15 15:39:40 <aush0k> [17:41:16] <+deuZ> is that some fucking faggot hivemind like ED? Apr 15 15:39:46 <PieAreSquare> The answer to that question Apr 15 15:39:46 <Finney> lol Apr 15 15:39:51 * Finney sets ban on *!*@4D73B2E7.7638D553.ACEAA30.IP Apr 15 15:39:55 <Finney> yes hello Apr 15 15:39:59 <PieAreSquare> Is the same as the answer to EVERY question which starts "Why did you molest me" Apr 15 15:40:01 <Finney> you are not saying anything of value Apr 15 15:40:04 <PieAreSquare> Because you were asking it, obv Apr 15 15:40:15 <deuZ> PieAreSquare, was not asking to get molested on the wiki Apr 15 15:40:15 <deuZ> yet i did Apr 15 15:40:16 <deuZ> by you Apr 15 15:40:16 * aush0k ([email protected]) has left #ed
THE ABBO POPO SHOWS UP
—THIS ISNT HARMLESS FUN |
Aush0k was arrested by the didgerido-gooders of the Aussie Feds for grave computer crimes and nefarious hacks. He was quickly awarded a Fosters and a jail cell in Sydney. It has been revealed that aush0k was actually the leader of LulzSec and that Sabu was merely a puppet. However, because the world's entire effort at accurate reporting is fucking zero they never checked their facts. He was in fact a hanger0n much like his entire Internet career. Despite the world police holding Sabu for the better part of almost two years it took the authorities much time to update their Twitters before they could arrest this cubicle slave. He is described as an IT worker who held many sensitive government MSpaint files as the Australian government has no idea how to utilize the Internet. RIP aush0k you 27 year old fuckup.
Aussie version of Goatse
Aush0k being the butt raping queer he is, decided to show off his unwashed anus on MSN to his gay lover Taekesi.
Notice how it's shaved; obviously his boyfriend is into shaved butthole's. Also what's up with it being all pink and stretched? ugh #closet
YouTube
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External Links
- lol arrested
- Template:Youtube2 -His current yt account used to sell Stolen Facebook accounts.
- Template:Youtube2 -Old Youtube account
- Template:Youtube2
-Aush0k Boss's current IRL girlfriend.Dumped LOL!!
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Aush0k is part of a series on Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage. |
Aush0k is part of a series on Ausfailia [Expand]
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